I need advice... talking to this girl online

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  • KnightOwl
    KnightOwl Posts: 38
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    Don't freak out silly... girls love receiving texts! Especially from a guy that we have given our phone number to. Text away! Get to know her! Make a date and go out and see how it goes. Sometimes online things work out, sometimes they don't. I've met people online that I've really clicked with and some people that weren't who they said they were...you just gotta keep fishing! That's why they call it plenty of fish :)
  • portexploit
    portexploit Posts: 378 Member
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    The many should initiate contact, that's the norm. If she is giving you excuses... one is understandable, but 2 or 3? Drop her, if she is interested, she will come back. When a girl expect me the one to always be calling/texting/messanging her, and she never returns that. I don't bother with her. I studied this entire mating/courtship/female psychology for 2yrs. Yes it's true women love it when you cal/text them, but that's it. It just feeds their ego, and you lose more of your power, masculinity. The more you chase a woman, the more likely... she will walk all over you. Find someone who isn't down for that bs, who cares for you just as much as you care for them.
  • NyxDominique
    NyxDominique Posts: 271 Member
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    This coming from the guy who said earlier.

    kick to the curb, don't waste your time with women bs.


    It is hard when you are just getting back out there. When you start dating again. Took me almost 3 yrs after my faincee to get back out there. To truely be able to open up to another person.

    Some woman wouldn't take advantage of a guy who txt's or calls her. Chasing or not chasing is all childs play and games.

    It should be about chemistry. If it is there then it is. If it is not then that can not be helped and you keep looking.
  • portexploit
    portexploit Posts: 378 Member
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    This coming from the guy who said earlier.

    kick to the curb, don't waste your time with women bs.


    It is hard when you are just getting back out there. When you start dating again. Took me almost 3 yrs after my faincee to get back out there. To truely be able to open up to another person.

    Some woman wouldn't take advantage of a guy who txt's or calls her. Chasing or not chasing is all childs play and games.

    It should be about chemistry. If it is there then it is. If it is not then that can not be helped and you keep looking.

    Yes it is all childs games, and it should be based on chemistry, if she's not responding to well, she's playiing games, or there is no chemistry.
  • Fattack
    Fattack Posts: 666 Member
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    before I text her I'm gonna ask her if it's okay if we take it to that level before I message her. I don't want her to be like who is this?? LOL!

    CHILL OUT. just send her a message like hey, it's <name here> from PoF. Just thought I'd check I took your number down correctly. How are you doing?



    Don't ask her what she's been upto lately, she may interpret it as "Why no message me online waaaagh" and don't be like "oh um is it ok for me to send you this / hope you don't mind" - being apologetic is a real turn off. You can be polite without being apologetic! BE CONFIDENT! Good luck :D
  • myofibril
    myofibril Posts: 4,500 Member
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    The first time we chated on the site she gave me my cell and I told her that I'd like to get to know someone first before we talk/text over the phone and I think that gained me a few bonus points.

    So the first time you chatted she gave you her number but you blew her off saying you wanted to get to know her better online first and you think that got you brownie points?

    Errrr, why exactly? Women don't tend to give out their number just for fun and to any old person. They give it out because they are interested to some degree AT THAT TIME and want you to act on it (well unless you are a moron in a bar who can't tell you are hassling a lady so they get given a fake number...)

    You've knocked her back and to make matters worse you have left her hanging for two weeks. Really? If I were that women I would be thinking: he can't be bothered (not attractive) he's unsure of himself or what he wants (pain in the *kitten*) he's got other women on the go so he can't make time to chat to me (playaaaaa)

    Seems like she was interested but that maybe dropping off as you hang around forever and a day getting your act together.

    It's simple. Grab your nuts. Be a man. Text her. Accept the consequences whatever they may be. Move forwards.
  • RoadDog
    RoadDog Posts: 2,946 Member
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    Put your phone down. Turn off your computer. Go outside. Take a walk in the park. Maybe you'll meet a real person. One that wants to relate outside the realm of cyberspace.

    I don't even know how to text and I'm getting laid.
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,022 Member
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    As a woman, I agree 100% with the following:
    Women don't tend to give out their number just for fun and to any old person. They give it out because they are interested to some degree AT THAT TIME and want you to act on it (well unless you are a moron in a bar who can't tell you are hassling a lady so they get given a fake number...)

    Seems like she was interested but that maybe dropping off as you hang around forever and a day getting your act together.

    If I give a guy my phone number, it means I want him to call me. Not text me. Not Facebook me. Not wait around for me to message him on some website because it's my "turn" to contact him. I want him to pick up the phone and call me. And if he drops the ball and doesn't call me, then I assume he's not interested in me, and I move on.

    And I'll let you in on another secret about women: if we really like you, we are NEVER too busy to make time for you. A woman will drop everything just to take a phone call from a man she's interested in. So all this "Oh, I'm really busy with work" stuff is a front. A person who is so busy she doesn't have time to talk to a guy is not going to have her profile on an online dating website.

    Furthermore, although I don't do the online dating thing myself, I don't think there's anything wrong with it if both people have honest intentions from the start. But that means you have to set up some kind of face-to-face meeting pretty much immediately. You cannot "get to know" someone through e-mails and texts and messages, and the longer you put off meeting each other, the more awkward things are going to get (unless you're okay with having an internet girlfriend forever). It's no different than if you met some chick in the produce section at the grocery store and she gave you her number; would you keep texting her and e-mailing her for weeks on end because you want to "get to know" her, or would you call her and ask her on a date?
    It's simple. Grab your nuts. Be a man. Text her. Accept the consequences whatever they may be. Move forwards.

    I agree with this, too, but I say call her instead of texting her. You have her phone number. Just do it. Call her and ask her to meet you for coffee or lunch. Suggest a place and time that's in broad daylight with lots of other people around so she can't pull the "I don't feel safe" card. If she's interested, she'll say yes. If she balks, then give up and move on.
  • fbmandy55
    fbmandy55 Posts: 5,263 Member
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    before I text her I'm gonna ask her if it's okay if we take it to that level before I message her. I don't want her to be like who is this?? LOL!

    CHILL OUT. just send her a message like hey, it's <name here> from PoF. Just thought I'd check I took your number down correctly. How are you doing?



    Don't ask her what she's been upto lately, she may interpret it as "Why no message me online waaaagh" and don't be like "oh um is it ok for me to send you this / hope you don't mind" - being apologetic is a real turn off. You can be polite without being apologetic! BE CONFIDENT! Good luck :D

    I agree with this suggestion. What's the worst case scenario, nothing that bad....
  • boomboom011
    boomboom011 Posts: 1,459
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    Put your phone down. Turn off your computer. Go outside. Take a walk in the park. Maybe you'll meet a real person. One that wants to relate outside the realm of cyberspace.

    I don't even know how to text and I'm getting laid.

    OMG this is the greatest advice ever!!!!!!!!!!!! You made me laugh! I would give you a high 5 if i could! Words of Wisdom!
  • myofibril
    myofibril Posts: 4,500 Member
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    And I'll let you in on another secret about women: if we really like you, we are NEVER too busy to make time for you. A woman will drop everything just to take a phone call from a man she's interested in. So all this "Oh, I'm really busy with work" stuff is a front. A person who is so busy she doesn't have time to talk to a guy is not going to have her profile on an online dating website.

    Exactly. You get a much better indicator of someone's level of interest in you by their actions rather than what they say. If a woman is attracted to you she will make it pretty easy for you to arrange a meeting or to be with her. This works in other areas as well. If you are out and a woman likes what she sees she will manage to plonk herself in your immediate vicinity at some point so you can strike up a conversation or will give you a sign that she welcomes your attention. Then it's your job not to say or do anything too stupid. Job done.
    I agree with this, too, but I say call her instead of texting her.

    Actually, this is a better idea. Cuts out all the faffing...
  • ThermalYew1
    ThermalYew1 Posts: 64 Member
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    Yea.. I'm pretty much given up on her... but now theres this other girl... who is practically my twin!!! I have never met anyone ANYONE who I could relate to so much... but the problem is... she works with my friend and I just friend requested her on FB and I was gonna leave it as that but then she messages me and we just talk and talk and talk... and it's been such a short time and... yeah... we're already starting to plan to hang out... BUT.... my friend likes her and as much as I like her.... I'm still trying to help him out with this girl... she does have a boyfriend though but it doesn't sound like they have a good relationship.... It's starting to get harder and harder the more I get to know her though.. she's like amazing... exactly what I've been looking for and I kinda get the feeling she feels the same way about me... :(
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,022 Member
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    She has a boyfriend AND your friend likes her, too? Recipe for disaster. And this comes one day after you tell us you're still into some chick you met online who keeps blowing you off.

    I'm not trying to be judgmental here, but it sounds to me like you're not emotionally ready for a serious relationship. I'm sensing a pattern of "boy meets girl, girl shows some interest, boy thinks girl is exactly what he's been looking for, girl backs off, boy realizes girl has something else going on, boy looks for the next girl who is exactly what he's been looking for." Wash, rinse, repeat.

    Why would you even consider trespassing on some other guy's territory, especially when the girl appears to be perfectly okay with flirting with other guys behind her boyfriend's back? That's the kind of woman you've always been looking for? You can do better.

    Don't even get me started on the friend thing. You've been playing wingman with this girl for your friend, and now you're going to screw him over?
  • BEERRUNNER
    BEERRUNNER Posts: 3,049 Member
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    Put your phone down. Turn off your computer. Go outside. Take a walk in the park. Maybe you'll meet a real person. One that wants to relate outside the realm of cyberspace.

    I don't even know how to text and I'm getting laid.

    Yeah I agree with the guy who wrote this above me............................ OR just throw your computer out the window and flush your cell phone down the toilet. Learning to interact face to face should be step 1 before taking into Cyberspace.
    Just my .2 cents
  • brewingaz
    brewingaz Posts: 1,136 Member
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    before I text her I'm gonna ask her if it's okay if we take it to that level before I message her. I don't want her to be like who is this?? LOL!

    Just f*ckin' do it anyways. She's a chick, she wants some balls, not a p*ssy. She'll be happy you took initiative.
  • EmilySG2011
    EmilySG2011 Posts: 82
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    Dating was so much easier before cellphones and computers. Communication skills were so much stronger and people could actually carry on decent conversation. Now there are so many more opportunities to meet people---yet people seem to be having a much harder time finding someone. I just don't understand. Dating really shouldn't be as hard as people make it. However, women like men with coinfidence---so what do you have to lose? If you want to talk to her then text her---what's the worst thing that could happen? Good Luck!:flowerforyou:
  • TheNewLK
    TheNewLK Posts: 933 Member
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    before I text her I'm gonna ask her if it's okay if we take it to that level before I message her. I don't want her to be like who is this?? LOL!

    Just f*ckin' do it anyways. She's a chick, she wants some balls, not a p*ssy. She'll be happy you took initiative.


    Haha I love a man who takes control
  • Chiquita_Banana
    Chiquita_Banana Posts: 500
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    before I text her I'm gonna ask her if it's okay if we take it to that level before I message her. I don't want her to be like who is this?? LOL!

    Just f*ckin' do it anyways. She's a chick, she wants some balls, not a p*ssy. She'll be happy you took initiative.


    Haha I love a man who takes control

    as do i lol lover u sarry
  • abbyko
    abbyko Posts: 108
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    As a woman, I agree 100% with the following:
    Women don't tend to give out their number just for fun and to any old person. They give it out because they are interested to some degree AT THAT TIME and want you to act on it (well unless you are a moron in a bar who can't tell you are hassling a lady so they get given a fake number...)

    Seems like she was interested but that maybe dropping off as you hang around forever and a day getting your act together.

    If I give a guy my phone number, it means I want him to call me. Not text me. Not Facebook me. Not wait around for me to message him on some website because it's my "turn" to contact him. I want him to pick up the phone and call me. And if he drops the ball and doesn't call me, then I assume he's not interested in me, and I move on.

    And I'll let you in on another secret about women: if we really like you, we are NEVER too busy to make time for you. A woman will drop everything just to take a phone call from a man she's interested in. So all this "Oh, I'm really busy with work" stuff is a front. A person who is so busy she doesn't have time to talk to a guy is not going to have her profile on an online dating website.

    Furthermore, although I don't do the online dating thing myself, I don't think there's anything wrong with it if both people have honest intentions from the start. But that means you have to set up some kind of face-to-face meeting pretty much immediately. You cannot "get to know" someone through e-mails and texts and messages, and the longer you put off meeting each other, the more awkward things are going to get (unless you're okay with having an internet girlfriend forever). It's no different than if you met some chick in the produce section at the grocery store and she gave you her number; would you keep texting her and e-mailing her for weeks on end because you want to "get to know" her, or would you call her and ask her on a date?
    It's simple. Grab your nuts. Be a man. Text her. Accept the consequences whatever they may be. Move forwards.

    I agree with this, too, but I say call her instead of texting her. You have her phone number. Just do it. Call her and ask her to meet you for coffee or lunch. Suggest a place and time that's in broad daylight with lots of other people around so she can't pull the "I don't feel safe" card. If she's interested, she'll say yes. If she balks, then give up and move on.


    Yes! I totally agree with this. Go for it. I'm not against a bit of texting first but don't let it go on for too long otherwise you'll just be stuck in a weird texting relationship.
  • BEERRUNNER
    BEERRUNNER Posts: 3,049 Member
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    Put your phone down. Turn off your computer. Go outside. Take a walk in the park. Maybe you'll meet a real person. One that wants to relate outside the realm of cyberspace.

    I don't even know how to text and I'm getting laid.

    Yeah I agree with the guy who wrote this above me............................ OR just throw your computer out the window and flush your cell phone down the toilet. Learning to interact face to face should be step 1 before taking into Cyberspace.
    Just my .2 cents

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