Long time maintainer, and sometimes I want to quit.

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Replies

  • nowine4me
    nowine4me Posts: 3,986 Member
    Maybe there's an in-between step? What if you continue to track your weight every day or whatever it takes to keep your streak (which is awesome -- by the way), but not log meals. In a few weeks, if that's not working go back to doing what has worked for you.
  • mrmeza123
    mrmeza123 Posts: 34 Member
    I've been on MFP for over four years now, haven't missed a day. I've been on maintenance for three years after successfully losing 90ish pounds. From the beginning, I've loved the control I have over what I eat. Counting calories made sense to me and it worked! My husband and I started MFP together and I love that it's something we share. We are active and walk, bike ride and now run together.

    But lately it's been a struggle. For some reason the scale has been fighting us, even though we are more active than ever. And, I find myself obsessing over it to the point where I feel like it consumes me and I get cranky when anything "interferes" with my planned calories.

    And, sometimes I just want to stop. I don't want to regain the weight, but part of me wants to go back to seeing food in all its pure deliciousness and not seeing numbers when I look at it. I love food and it's something I'm passionate about. We don't deprive ourselves of the things we enjoy, but I get tired of feeling like I have to feel guilty when we overindulge. And I get jealous of how the rest of the world just eats what they want, when they want without stressing over it.

    I've thought of taking a break, but honestly I'm afraid. And, I'm quite proud of my 1,528 day streak. I feel like if we stopped logging, we may lose control and gain all we've lost. I'm also afraid I wouldn't be able to look at food without seeing numbers anyway because I'm so used to knowing the calorie count of everything. Can anyone relate to this? Has anyone successfully stopped logging? Am I doomed to log the rest of my life? I worry that one day I will look back with regret because I allowed myself to be so obsessed with logging that I missed out on enjoying life to the fullest.

    Try logging in a couple days at one time. So your only logging on once or twice the week.
  • crayonbreakywillow
    crayonbreakywillow Posts: 44 Member
    I generally don't comment as I don't consider myself much of a good advice giver. Just thought I would throw in my two cents. Our minds can play some crazy tricks on us. I was O.C.D for most of my life and had to turn the door handle three times every time I walked out the exterior door to make sure it was locked. Eventually the door handle screws wobbled so loose that it fell off and I came home one day to an open door. Now that sounds silly, but I am making a point... you worked so hard to get to where you are. As much as I love this APP it is just an awesome tool. You lost the weight because you made a life decision and stuck with it. Sometimes the mental is the final hurdle, and since you made it through the physical... you are at the finish line. In my humble opinion, if you just maintain the discipline in your nutrition as you have you will be fine. Keep it up.

    As for the "everyone else just eating whatever they want", it will catch up with most at some point in their life and they will be begging to be where you are now. I've fallen off the wagon three times, and I never want to feel that way again. Keep doing what you are doing. Be proud of who you are become, the amount of days you logged means little to the amount of extra days of healthy life you have added for yourself.

    Wishing you the best of luck in your journey. Congrats on being and staying fit!

    I love what you said about this APP being just a tool. You're right. I definitely think it is a mental hurdle I need to overcome. By the way, thanks for the friend request! I also want to mention (because I feel like I have to explain myself!) that if you happen to see my diary for today, you'll see I went way over. My best friend had surgery today and I spent the day at the hospital with her. I decided ahead of time that I wasn't going to worry about what I ate. I'm fine doing this if I decide ahead that I'm going to, and I always log it. I would have been stressed if I hadn't planned for this and I had a day that went way over. So, somewhere in there, it's about controlling and deciding? Anyway, I'm going to be working hard on this mental hurdle. Thanks again!

  • crayonbreakywillow
    crayonbreakywillow Posts: 44 Member
    @RelevantGains I really like this idea! Thank you!!
  • victoria_1024
    victoria_1024 Posts: 915 Member
    I've only been in maintenance since April after losing 90 lbs but I do have that longing to just eat whatever I want and go back to my old habits! And the jealousy that other people don't have to think about all this as much as I do and they can just go about their lives! Like others, I like being thin and I'm motivated to stay that way but some days are harder than others.

    Something that works for me is taking weekends off of logging. Sometimes just a day, sometimes 3 days. I just eat what I want and don't care. I always gain weight of course, so then I eat at a slight deficit starting Monday morning and it comes off very quickly. I always continue with a high activity level and exercise. And it's not like I eat an entire pizza by myself, I do try to be mindful but I definitely go over by quite a bit and I don't log. I know this wouldn't work for everyone but I like it because i still get to really enjoy food on a regular basis but while still feeling in control of the process. I'd rather eat at a deficit some days and over eat other days than eat at maintenance all the time. But that's just what has worked for me. I'm still new to this so I'm assuming what works for me will change too!
  • Jessie24330
    Jessie24330 Posts: 224 Member
    I didn't read all the comments so maybe it's been mentioned but you don't have to log to keep up your streak. Just visit the site and it counts you for that day. So you don't have to worry about losing your streak if you want to take a break.

    I've still got a long way to go but I took a little over a year off without gaining. I weighed myself daily and if my weight started to go up more than a few pounds, I started being more careful until it went back where it started. That's my plan when I get to maintenance. Give myself a few pound "buffer" (since weight is always going to bounce around) and work on it when it hits my limit. Of course I'm not going to go wild everyday so that I'm back to counting calories every week or two, but I'm not going to count every day. At this point, I've pretty well learned how to gauge what I can have and what I can't so I plan to take those skills to maintenance with me.
  • mommarnurse
    mommarnurse Posts: 515 Member
    I can honestly say that I feel exactly like you, to the point of tears out of shear frustration. I don't have answer for you , but definitely some real sympathy.
  • Christine_72
    Christine_72 Posts: 16,056 Member
    Wow! Thank you all for the replies! Reading your thoughts, suggestions and encouragement has been wonderful. Thank you all! I think that my mindset is what is stressing me out. I tend to be a perfectionist about things and I think I feel like to stop logging would somehow equal quitting. I know this makes no sense because I would never go back to just eating mindlessly. The thought of not logging makes me feel panicked. It's become such a second nature.

    Some of you suggested weighing everyday and ironically, we just decided to stop doing that. We've been obsessing over every ounce and we decided to only weigh in weekly instead. This has actually helped a lot, but I still feel like I obsess about logging.

    The thing is, we have certain days of the year that we freely indulge and don't feel guilty (but still log) such as our anniversary, birthdays etc. But, when unexpected life stuff comes up that we don't plan for, it stresses me out and makes me cranky to have to adjust my calories for it. I also feel like we "need" more indulgence days than we used to. We used to be satisfied with a few a year, now I feel tempted to go over calories often.

    We've put ourselves back on a half pound deficit lately because the scale has been creeping up (despite exercise and eating maintenance calories) and it's been frustrating to fight the scale lately. That has definitely added to my temptation to just quit.

    I am thinking of attempting the "log in, but don't log food for a while" idea, just to see if it's even possible for my brain to adjust to that. I always pre log my food the night before, at least to get a rough estimate. I don't know how I would untrain my brain to add the calories in my head.

    I can't imagine ever letting myself gain back 90 pounds. I'm much too aware of my eating now and we maintain a very active lifestyle as well. I try to eat somewhat healthy, but I'll admit, we often make unhealthy choices as long as they fit in our calories. Maybe I should try focusing more on eating the healthy foods I enjoy most of the time, and adding in the unhealthy foods in small doses?

    Again, thank you all for your ideas and support! It's so nice to have a group like this that understands where I'm coming from.

    OP you are not alone. I can 100% relate to the bolded ^^^ I feel the exact same way.

  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,373 Member
    edited August 2016
    Wow! Thank you all for the replies! Reading your thoughts, suggestions and encouragement has been wonderful. Thank you all! I think that my mindset is what is stressing me out. I tend to be a perfectionist about things and I think I feel like to stop logging would somehow equal quitting. I know this makes no sense because I would never go back to just eating mindlessly. The thought of not logging makes me feel panicked. It's become such a second nature.

    Some of you suggested weighing everyday and ironically, we just decided to stop doing that. We've been obsessing over every ounce and we decided to only weigh in weekly instead. This has actually helped a lot, but I still feel like I obsess about logging.

    The thing is, we have certain days of the year that we freely indulge and don't feel guilty (but still log) such as our anniversary, birthdays etc. But, when unexpected life stuff comes up that we don't plan for, it stresses me out and makes me cranky to have to adjust my calories for it. I also feel like we "need" more indulgence days than we used to. We used to be satisfied with a few a year, now I feel tempted to go over calories often.

    We've put ourselves back on a half pound deficit lately because the scale has been creeping up (despite exercise and eating maintenance calories) and it's been frustrating to fight the scale lately. That has definitely added to my temptation to just quit.

    I am thinking of attempting the "log in, but don't log food for a while" idea, just to see if it's even possible for my brain to adjust to that. I always pre log my food the night before, at least to get a rough estimate. I don't know how I would untrain my brain to add the calories in my head.

    I can't imagine ever letting myself gain back 90 pounds. I'm much too aware of my eating now and we maintain a very active lifestyle as well. I try to eat somewhat healthy, but I'll admit, we often make unhealthy choices as long as they fit in our calories. Maybe I should try focusing more on eating the healthy foods I enjoy most of the time, and adding in the unhealthy foods in small doses?

    Again, thank you all for your ideas and support! It's so nice to have a group like this that understands where I'm coming from.

    OP you are not alone. I can 100% relate to the bolded ^^^ I feel the exact same way.

    Same here. I'm always torn between wanting to go out and indulge a little bit and knowing that I really shouldn't. Frankly sometimes it makes things suck because I end up missing out on fun opportunities.. I mean, yeah, I don't have to eat anything when we decide to go out for ice cream after dinner at the last minute, but sheesh, it sucks (it's a good week when I have a 1500 calorie deficit, so even 200 calories makes a difference - I'm trying to stay on a small deficit too).

    I'm not sure I could stop counting though, even if I didn't log... I'd probably end up doing it mentally anyway (which is what I do when we go out/eat at other people). I suppose it helps to realize that, as it means that I don't think I'll ever be able to actually enjoy my food the same way anyway when I know how many calories are in it... So I log. Might as well. I have noticed that I naturally try to follow my hunger cues now though, so I probably wouldn't go overboard most days, but I guarantee that during PMS I'd probably end up gaining 2 pounds every month if I didn't log.