Long time maintainer, and sometimes I want to quit.

2

Replies

  • Jessie24330
    Jessie24330 Posts: 224 Member
    I didn't read all the comments so maybe it's been mentioned but you don't have to log to keep up your streak. Just visit the site and it counts you for that day. So you don't have to worry about losing your streak if you want to take a break.

    I've still got a long way to go but I took a little over a year off without gaining. I weighed myself daily and if my weight started to go up more than a few pounds, I started being more careful until it went back where it started. That's my plan when I get to maintenance. Give myself a few pound "buffer" (since weight is always going to bounce around) and work on it when it hits my limit. Of course I'm not going to go wild everyday so that I'm back to counting calories every week or two, but I'm not going to count every day. At this point, I've pretty well learned how to gauge what I can have and what I can't so I plan to take those skills to maintenance with me.
  • mommarnurse
    mommarnurse Posts: 515 Member
    I can honestly say that I feel exactly like you, to the point of tears out of shear frustration. I don't have answer for you , but definitely some real sympathy.
  • Christine_72
    Christine_72 Posts: 16,049 Member
    Wow! Thank you all for the replies! Reading your thoughts, suggestions and encouragement has been wonderful. Thank you all! I think that my mindset is what is stressing me out. I tend to be a perfectionist about things and I think I feel like to stop logging would somehow equal quitting. I know this makes no sense because I would never go back to just eating mindlessly. The thought of not logging makes me feel panicked. It's become such a second nature.

    Some of you suggested weighing everyday and ironically, we just decided to stop doing that. We've been obsessing over every ounce and we decided to only weigh in weekly instead. This has actually helped a lot, but I still feel like I obsess about logging.

    The thing is, we have certain days of the year that we freely indulge and don't feel guilty (but still log) such as our anniversary, birthdays etc. But, when unexpected life stuff comes up that we don't plan for, it stresses me out and makes me cranky to have to adjust my calories for it. I also feel like we "need" more indulgence days than we used to. We used to be satisfied with a few a year, now I feel tempted to go over calories often.

    We've put ourselves back on a half pound deficit lately because the scale has been creeping up (despite exercise and eating maintenance calories) and it's been frustrating to fight the scale lately. That has definitely added to my temptation to just quit.

    I am thinking of attempting the "log in, but don't log food for a while" idea, just to see if it's even possible for my brain to adjust to that. I always pre log my food the night before, at least to get a rough estimate. I don't know how I would untrain my brain to add the calories in my head.

    I can't imagine ever letting myself gain back 90 pounds. I'm much too aware of my eating now and we maintain a very active lifestyle as well. I try to eat somewhat healthy, but I'll admit, we often make unhealthy choices as long as they fit in our calories. Maybe I should try focusing more on eating the healthy foods I enjoy most of the time, and adding in the unhealthy foods in small doses?

    Again, thank you all for your ideas and support! It's so nice to have a group like this that understands where I'm coming from.

    OP you are not alone. I can 100% relate to the bolded ^^^ I feel the exact same way.

  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    edited August 2016
    Wow! Thank you all for the replies! Reading your thoughts, suggestions and encouragement has been wonderful. Thank you all! I think that my mindset is what is stressing me out. I tend to be a perfectionist about things and I think I feel like to stop logging would somehow equal quitting. I know this makes no sense because I would never go back to just eating mindlessly. The thought of not logging makes me feel panicked. It's become such a second nature.

    Some of you suggested weighing everyday and ironically, we just decided to stop doing that. We've been obsessing over every ounce and we decided to only weigh in weekly instead. This has actually helped a lot, but I still feel like I obsess about logging.

    The thing is, we have certain days of the year that we freely indulge and don't feel guilty (but still log) such as our anniversary, birthdays etc. But, when unexpected life stuff comes up that we don't plan for, it stresses me out and makes me cranky to have to adjust my calories for it. I also feel like we "need" more indulgence days than we used to. We used to be satisfied with a few a year, now I feel tempted to go over calories often.

    We've put ourselves back on a half pound deficit lately because the scale has been creeping up (despite exercise and eating maintenance calories) and it's been frustrating to fight the scale lately. That has definitely added to my temptation to just quit.

    I am thinking of attempting the "log in, but don't log food for a while" idea, just to see if it's even possible for my brain to adjust to that. I always pre log my food the night before, at least to get a rough estimate. I don't know how I would untrain my brain to add the calories in my head.

    I can't imagine ever letting myself gain back 90 pounds. I'm much too aware of my eating now and we maintain a very active lifestyle as well. I try to eat somewhat healthy, but I'll admit, we often make unhealthy choices as long as they fit in our calories. Maybe I should try focusing more on eating the healthy foods I enjoy most of the time, and adding in the unhealthy foods in small doses?

    Again, thank you all for your ideas and support! It's so nice to have a group like this that understands where I'm coming from.

    OP you are not alone. I can 100% relate to the bolded ^^^ I feel the exact same way.

    Same here. I'm always torn between wanting to go out and indulge a little bit and knowing that I really shouldn't. Frankly sometimes it makes things suck because I end up missing out on fun opportunities.. I mean, yeah, I don't have to eat anything when we decide to go out for ice cream after dinner at the last minute, but sheesh, it sucks (it's a good week when I have a 1500 calorie deficit, so even 200 calories makes a difference - I'm trying to stay on a small deficit too).

    I'm not sure I could stop counting though, even if I didn't log... I'd probably end up doing it mentally anyway (which is what I do when we go out/eat at other people). I suppose it helps to realize that, as it means that I don't think I'll ever be able to actually enjoy my food the same way anyway when I know how many calories are in it... So I log. Might as well. I have noticed that I naturally try to follow my hunger cues now though, so I probably wouldn't go overboard most days, but I guarantee that during PMS I'd probably end up gaining 2 pounds every month if I didn't log.
  • Need2Exerc1se
    Need2Exerc1se Posts: 13,575 Member
    Oh you're post sounds like where I thought I'd be if I had kept up with logging. I'm glad I decided to lose without it.
  • Christine_72
    Christine_72 Posts: 16,049 Member
    edited August 2016
    Today is the last day of winter hooooraaayyy. I have logged everyday for 2 years, and yet i still put on around 3kgs(6lbs) over the winter. If i dont nip it in the bud now, in a few months it will be 6kgs and on and on it will go until it just becomes too hard..
  • crayonbreakywillow
    crayonbreakywillow Posts: 44 Member
    Oh you're post sounds like where I thought I'd be if I had kept up with logging. I'm glad I decided to lose without it.

    Curious...what has your strategy been, since you decided to quit logging?
  • I don't have anything to add since I'm nowhere near maintenance, but I did want to say that I like your screenname :)
  • @amyinthetardis1231 Thank you!!
  • Need2Exerc1se
    Need2Exerc1se Posts: 13,575 Member
    Oh you're post sounds like where I thought I'd be if I had kept up with logging. I'm glad I decided to lose without it.

    Curious...what has your strategy been, since you decided to quit logging?

    Eat light during the week, eat more on the weekends without pigging out, keep an eye on the scale. Lost 30ish lbs and have kept it off for about a year. Just now deciding to lose another 10 lbs so tightening my diet back up a bit.

    I should note that I'm 53 and was at a healthy weight for over 40 of those, so eating reasonable amounts is not something new to me.
  • JenniferNoll
    JenniferNoll Posts: 367 Member
    Wow! 90 pounds! You are my idol!
  • GoneGirl50
    GoneGirl50 Posts: 65 Member
    I lost the weight in about 8 - 9 months, then started to gain very slowly. My new lifestyle changes kept it under 5 - 6 lbs; however, I started to feel invincible, so I began to eat out more frequently, bought a large quantity of chocolates, and quit my walking group (that is another story). I realized that I've gained over 15 lbs back, I decided to get back here and put a stop to it.

    It is hard to lose weight, so I"m going to start reading the maintenance community posts before I get to that point. My tentative plan is to do a modified fast one day per week to maintain my weight loss. If I discover a better option, I'll try it. I can't count calories for the rest of my life!
  • srecupid
    srecupid Posts: 660 Member
    I don't want to quit but, I'm also sick of being so fastidius. I went to a deli today and got this for $2.59 0acsn7a09tdc.jpg Alot better than going to subway right? I didn't have breakfast and i walked to the deli which is 2.4 miles one way away as well as walking to dunkin doughnuts for coffee this morning so why do i feel guilty?
  • Need2Exerc1se
    Need2Exerc1se Posts: 13,575 Member
    srecupid wrote: »
    I don't want to quit but, I'm also sick of being so fastidius. I went to a deli today and got this for $2.59 0acsn7a09tdc.jpg Alot better than going to subway right? I didn't have breakfast and i walked to the deli which is 2.4 miles one way away as well as walking to dunkin doughnuts for coffee this morning so why do i feel guilty?

    Oh man, that looks 1,000,000% better than subway.
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    srecupid wrote: »
    I don't want to quit but, I'm also sick of being so fastidius. I went to a deli today and got this for $2.59 0acsn7a09tdc.jpg Alot better than going to subway right? I didn't have breakfast and i walked to the deli which is 2.4 miles one way away as well as walking to dunkin doughnuts for coffee this morning so why do i feel guilty?

    Just eat less later/tomorrow.

    Yesterday I made a whole wheat boule. It came out of the oven at 3.30pm... I had crazy carb cravings so I made myself a sandwich with two huge slices (400 calories of bread!), and some ham and swiss. It was amazing. I ended up skipping dinner (I wasn't that hungry anymore after that), went for a long walk, and I still ended up with a 300+ calorie deficit. Totally worth it.

    Seriously though, most days if I end up giving in to something I'm craving (I also had a big bowl of rice with sugar and milk as a second breakfast yesterday morning!), I still end up under maintenance because I'm just less hungry later anyway... Ok I didn't hit my macros (was only 7/8g off though), but life's too short to deprive yourself all the time.
  • srecupid
    srecupid Posts: 660 Member
    Francl27 wrote: »
    srecupid wrote: »
    I don't want to quit but, I'm also sick of being so fastidius. I went to a deli today and got this for $2.59 0acsn7a09tdc.jpg Alot better than going to subway right? I didn't have breakfast and i walked to the deli which is 2.4 miles one way away as well as walking to dunkin doughnuts for coffee this morning so why do i feel guilty?

    Just eat less later/tomorrow.

    Yesterday I made a whole wheat boule. It came out of the oven at 3.30pm... I had crazy carb cravings so I made myself a sandwich with two huge slices (400 calories of bread!), and some ham and swiss. It was amazing. I ended up skipping dinner (I wasn't that hungry anymore after that), went for a long walk, and I still ended up with a 300+ calorie deficit. Totally worth it.

    Seriously though, most days if I end up giving in to something I'm craving (I also had a big bowl of rice with sugar and milk as a second breakfast yesterday morning!), I still end up under maintenance because I'm just less hungry later anyway... Ok I didn't hit my macros (was only 7/8g off though), but life's too short to deprive yourself all the time.

    My goal is set for sedentary. so far today i have 13,288 steps at 3pm. I'm pretty sure that's not sedentary. I hope my indulgent days balance themself out in the long runr
  • elisa123gal
    elisa123gal Posts: 4,324 Member
    I've only been in maintenance since April after losing 90 lbs but I do have that longing to just eat whatever I want and go back to my old habits! And the jealousy that other people don't have to think about all this as much as I do and they can just go about their lives! Like others, I like being thin and I'm motivated to stay that way but some days are harder than others.

    Something that works for me is taking weekends off of logging. Sometimes just a day, sometimes 3 days. I just eat what I want and don't care. I always gain weight of course, so then I eat at a slight deficit starting Monday morning and it comes off very quickly. I always continue with a high activity level and exercise. And it's not like I eat an entire pizza by myself, I do try to be mindful but I definitely go over by quite a bit and I don't log. I know this wouldn't work for everyone but I like it because i still get to really enjoy food on a regular basis but while still feeling in control of the process. I'd rather eat at a deficit some days and over eat other days than eat at maintenance all the time. But that's just what has worked for me. I'm still new to this so I'm assuming what works for me will change too!
    What you are doing is living like a skinny person. That is what they do! I think you've got it down. Skinny people eat what they want..they just don't do it constantly… they cut back after a big weekend..to them it is easy and makes sense and isn't a big deal.
  • PAV8888
    PAV8888 Posts: 14,209 Member
    srecupid wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    srecupid wrote: »
    I don't want to quit but, I'm also sick of being so fastidius. I went to a deli today and got this for $2.59 0acsn7a09tdc.jpg Alot better than going to subway right? I didn't have breakfast and i walked to the deli which is 2.4 miles one way away as well as walking to dunkin doughnuts for coffee this morning so why do i feel guilty?

    Just eat less later/tomorrow.

    Yesterday I made a whole wheat boule. It came out of the oven at 3.30pm... I had crazy carb cravings so I made myself a sandwich with two huge slices (400 calories of bread!), and some ham and swiss. It was amazing. I ended up skipping dinner (I wasn't that hungry anymore after that), went for a long walk, and I still ended up with a 300+ calorie deficit. Totally worth it.

    Seriously though, most days if I end up giving in to something I'm craving (I also had a big bowl of rice with sugar and milk as a second breakfast yesterday morning!), I still end up under maintenance because I'm just less hungry later anyway... Ok I didn't hit my macros (was only 7/8g off though), but life's too short to deprive yourself all the time.

    My goal is set for sedentary. so far today i have 13,288 steps at 3pm. I'm pretty sure that's not sedentary. I hope my indulgent days balance themself out in the long runr

    >5000 steps = starts to exceed sedentary person calories
    >7500 steps = starts to exceeed lightly active person calories
    >10000 to 12000 steps = starts to exceed active person calories
    >12500 to 15500 steps = starts to exceed very active person calories

    At > 13288 your corresponding MFP setting without logging any additional exercise would be "very active"
  • bfanny
    bfanny Posts: 440 Member
    You can take a break stop logging and see what happens but If you gain 5 lbs then you'll have to make a decision, to start logging or gain more weight and eventually... start logging again ;)
  • Thanks again for all the responses!! Just a little update...so far this week, I haven't really logged. I've continued to weigh and measure my food, and quickly add the calories in my head, but not really log. I have tried not to spend too much time thinking ahead about what I'm going to eat. I've just made sure that each meal (breakfast,lunch,dinner,snacks) has been under the amount of calories I've allotted for that meal. 450-450-600-300. So far, I've been able to add in my head the approximate amount of calories I've had at the end of the day, and I've come in under that every day. I actually think I've been eating less calories this week and feeling more satisfied.

    I may log this weekend because of the holiday and some events I have scheduled that are outside of the ordinary. Chances are, I'll end up over my calories, but I want to allow myself to enjoy without guilt. Anyway, I really feel hopeful that I will be able to eventually quit logging all together and be able to eat intuitively. It's still way too early to know that for sure, but I'm hopeful!
  • stephbroadbelt
    stephbroadbelt Posts: 9 Member
    Thanks all for the discussion! I reached my goal loss of about 15 lbs a year ago and have been logging maintenance since then. I can definitely relate to the OP about having to log. I pre-log most days to see where I can It's just a habit at this point and I don't feel bad about going over as long as I'm under or at maintenance the rest of the week. I've been within 5 lbs of my "goal weight" since last August so I feel pretty confident about being able to cut back when needed.

    Where I'm having trouble is that my maintenance calories according to MFP and TDEE calculators is only about 1300-1400 calories. I have a pretty small build and am relatively active in the warmer months by working in a city and walking to/from public transit, but am getting discouraged about having to think about calories for the rest of my life to not gain a ton of weight. If I go over 1300 and don't have at least 15,000 steps that day I see the difference right away on the scale. For now I'm fine with logging and checking in, but I'm not even 30 yet and I get stuck looking forward and trying to motivate my future-self to exercise which is hard because I barely do now besides walking.
  • chocolate_owl
    chocolate_owl Posts: 1,695 Member
    I'm going to keep following this thread, I really enjoy your updates and am looking forward to seeing how this phase of the process goes for you :) I really hope you get to where you want to be!