This is why people gain weight, and why losing it is so hard.
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Again, I'm not asking you for help, I'm just making conversation about how much it F#*$&%@ sucks.
Yeah, quite often the responses here are meant to illuminate the hordes that are scrambling aimlessly in ignorance, and aren't really attempting to address the OP.
Don't take it personally.
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It sucks. But, the options are to continue eating like you always have and stay they way you are or suck it up and change.
#warcat5 -
rosebarnalice wrote: »So here's were the experiment comes into play. I thought, you know what, I've never just booked out a normal "non deiting" day, lets see how many calories that is. So I went into MFP and loaded up what I would eat on a normal day. Over 4500 calories!!! HOLY S**T!!!! No wonder people get so fat so quickly without even realizing whats happening!
I had a similar "come to begeesus" moment when ai realized what an "average" non-logging day looked like for me--around 3,000 calories.
One thing that helped me put that number into perspective was the RDA guidelines that say that an "average" woman should consume 1600 - 2000 calories, so that 3K number both (a) brought into sharp focus how crazy out of control I was; and (b) got me thinking about what non-eating changes I would have to make in order to be satisfied in the long term of ~1800 calories a day.
Some of those changes (with which I experimented while on my weight loss journey) included:- eating a LOT more high-fiber veggies like cabbage, onions, and squash--which provide a satisfyingly large amount of food for much lower calores
- learning to love SOUP! I want to feel full, and the bulk of a water- or veggie-based (as opposed to cream-based) soup fills me up without adding lots of calories
- being aware of the difference between hunger and thirst. Sometimes, a big ole glass of water is what I REALLY need. . . I just got into the habit of eating rather than drinking when I felt "that way."
- Practicing portion control, getting better at estimating portion size (and confirming my estimates with a scale) and STOPPING when I had eaten a "reasonable" portion-- not when I had an Alice-Sized portion (which was NOT reasonable.)
- focusing on some of the non-eating psychological/ emotional/ headgame things that lead to more eating-- like "I deserve a treat" mentality, or "I really need this beer to relax" mentality, or "I have to eat this or X will be sad" mentality.
By incorporating some of these changes as I worked on my weight loss, I was ready for them when I reached maintenance.
I've been maintaining successfully since February on 1800 calories--but I DO eat most of my exercise calories (between 300- 600 calories) when I work out.
Good luck to you!
I love this....I shall hit copy/paste/print!0 -
LiminalAscendance wrote: »Again, I'm not asking you for help, I'm just making conversation about how much it F#*$&%@ sucks.
Yeah, quite often the responses here are meant to illuminate the hordes that are scrambling aimlessly in ignorance, and aren't really attempting to address the OP.
Don't take it personally.
God forbid we try to help when the post is made in the forum "general weight loss help". It's not like this is the motivation section...9 -
LiminalAscendance wrote: »Again, I'm not asking you for help, I'm just making conversation about how much it F#*$&%@ sucks.
Yeah, quite often the responses here are meant to illuminate the hordes that are scrambling aimlessly in ignorance, and aren't really attempting to address the OP.
Don't take it personally.
God forbid we try to help when the post is made in the forum "general weight loss help". It's not like this is the motivation section...
True. I think a lot of people forget about the other sections of this forum. This probably does belong in the motivation section, since he just wanted to vent (or said that point blank. I've seen many vent threads around here). Plus, I think it's human nature to naturally want to help someone who seems like they are floundering. Also, the advice isn't always solely meant for the OP, but for lurkers as well. I know I've gotten great advice from just lurking certain threads and never posting in it. But that's just my opinion.7 -
Your maintenance calories are only low in relation to what you've been eating. You'll adapt to your new normal soon enough. Just stop looking so far ahead. Of course it's daunting to go look at going from eating 4000 calories to 1800, but it isn't going to be an overnight switch. Your calories are reduced as your weight goes down, and as your weight goes down so will your need for larger quantities.
For example, at one point it was not uncommon for me to eat two whole 12-inch subs in one sitting. Gross, I know, but last week I ordered one 12-inch and got about 3/4 of the way through before feeling stuffed. I forced the last bit down out of habit, but I could've stopped sooner. Next time, maybe just one 6-inch will be enough. This is something I've noticed happening more often. The foods I used to eat with abandon are now foods I enjoy more in smaller quantities and I don't feel deprived by it. That's not to say there aren't times when I want to scarf down three cupcakes and a big bag of chips, but that's something I will learn to deal with over time, I can't expect a lifetime of an unhealthy relationship with food to sort itself out overnight.
Don't judge the end of your journey by how you feel at the start. Things will change.3 -
LiminalAscendance wrote: »Again, I'm not asking you for help, I'm just making conversation about how much it F#*$&%@ sucks.
Yeah, quite often the responses here are meant to illuminate the hordes that are scrambling aimlessly in ignorance, and aren't really attempting to address the OP.
Don't take it personally.
God forbid we try to help when the post is made in the forum "general weight loss help". It's not like this is the motivation section...
This. If it was posted in the Motivation/Support thread maybe you would have gotten the responses you wanted. The Help thread is usually for people looking for help. And is often frequented by lurkers who are not the OP and also looking for help.
FYI, OP I enjoy my food too. I don't just eat because I'm hungry - food is one of the great joys of life. But I have taken the last couple of years and learned how to structure my diet so that I don't have to think too much, I don't have to spend too much, I definitely LOVE what I eat, and I'm at the correct calorie level too. With all due respect, if all you're eating is a lot of fast food, candy, and soda, experimenting a little with food will get you to a diet that is WAY more yummy and with WAY less calories. You aren't prioritizing delicious food, you're prioritizing convenience.
Sorry I couldn't commiserate, but best of luck.9 -
So before I get into what I'm about to say, I'd like to thank everyone who was constructive towards me while I was having a low moment.
A lot of you gave some great advice, even though I am pretty well versed in weight loss and knew a lot of it already. But here's the thing, I didn't ask for advice. There was no question in my original post. I was just making conversation about how difficult it is going to be to eat a reasonable amount of food once I get to my goal weight. Obviously, I have a problem when it comes to food. For a lot of you its just a thing you do 3ish times a day so you will continue to have energy and live. For me, its almost ceremonious. Eating is not just something I do to survive, its something I thoroughly enjoy. Meal time is something I look forward to for reasons other than hunger. Telling me to just eat healthier/lower calorie/more nutritious/whatever foods is like telling a cocaine addict that he should just smoke pot instead and everything will be alright. It's not a matter of knowing what to do, because God knows I know exactly what to do, its a matter of being able to do it. I'm only on day 12 and I've been doing well so far. There is no reason for me to believe I cant continue what I'm doing for many months. It's after that that concerns me, and once again, its not that I can't, its that I'm having to chose between something I enjoy, and something I need to be healthy. There's no answer, no way to fix it. I didn't ask anyone to help me solve the problem. I was just making conversation about how it sucks.
I love food. Like I LOVE food. It is now, has always been, and probably will always be a thing for me. I am an emotional eater, but I also really love cooking and a great meal and seriously, it's like something that is super important to me. In my family, it's also how you show love. It's not just fuel for me. It never will be.
You're saying you weren't asking for advice (although you did post in the help section), but I'm going to give you some more anyhow. You're on Day 12. Don't worry so much about maintenance right now. Worry about taking it off.
I have been on this journey before. Maybe you have too. If I stress about what it's going to be like after, then it sabotages me NOW. And NOW is what I need to worry about.
And if you are insistent about worrying about what it will be like when you're in maintenance, I think what most of us are telling you is that our ideas of what proper portions look like, shift. They change. You probably will too. There's no reason why you can't have the things you list, just not daily and not in those amounts.
And lastly, this is hard. Pounds do not, and have never melted off of me the way they do some people. Food is like an addiction for me. I hate the fact that I have to log every single thing I eat and will probably need to do that for the rest of my life if I want to be at a healthy weight, but I've come to realize that this is just the way it is for me. You do whatever works for you, but you're in the process. Don't let what comes after sabotage you.
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LiminalAscendance wrote: »Again, I'm not asking you for help, I'm just making conversation about how much it F#*$&%@ sucks.
Yeah, quite often the responses here are meant to illuminate the hordes that are scrambling aimlessly in ignorance, and aren't really attempting to address the OP.
Don't take it personally.
God forbid we try to help when the post is made in the forum "general weight loss help". It's not like this is the motivation section...
This. If it was posted in the Motivation/Support thread maybe you would have gotten the responses you wanted. The Help thread is usually for people looking for help. And is often frequented by lurkers who are not the OP and also looking for help.
FYI, OP I enjoy my food too. I don't just eat because I'm hungry - food is one of the great joys of life. But I have taken the last couple of years and learned how to structure my diet so that I don't have to think too much, I don't have to spend too much, I definitely LOVE what I eat, and I'm at the correct calorie level too. With all due respect, if all you're eating is a lot of fast food, candy, and soda, experimenting a little with food will get you to a diet that is WAY more yummy and with WAY less calories. You aren't prioritizing delicious food, you're prioritizing convenience.
Sorry I couldn't commiserate, but best of luck.
This is a great point: There are many ways to LOVE what you're eating. I LOVE all of the foods I eat. I wouldn't eat them otherwise. I'm a foodie. I really enjoy food. We eat out a few times a week.
WHAT I love has changed. And what I now love fits in the context of my lifestyle.
Again, a paradigm shift.4 -
LiminalAscendance wrote: »Again, I'm not asking you for help, I'm just making conversation about how much it F#*$&%@ sucks.
Yeah, quite often the responses here are meant to illuminate the hordes that are scrambling aimlessly in ignorance, and aren't really attempting to address the OP.
Don't take it personally.
God forbid we try to help when the post is made in the forum "general weight loss help". It's not like this is the motivation section...
This. If it was posted in the Motivation/Support thread maybe you would have gotten the responses you wanted. The Help thread is usually for people looking for help. And is often frequented by lurkers who are not the OP and also looking for help.
FYI, OP I enjoy my food too. I don't just eat because I'm hungry - food is one of the great joys of life. But I have taken the last couple of years and learned how to structure my diet so that I don't have to think too much, I don't have to spend too much, I definitely LOVE what I eat, and I'm at the correct calorie level too. With all due respect, if all you're eating is a lot of fast food, candy, and soda, experimenting a little with food will get you to a diet that is WAY more yummy and with WAY less calories. You aren't prioritizing delicious food, you're prioritizing convenience.
Sorry I couldn't commiserate, but best of luck.
I wasn't going to respond to this when I read the first paragraph, but since the second one was so ridiculous I'll go ahead and hit both.
I understand there are lurkers, and I understand that the people who were trying to help maybe weren't talking to me but just everyone in general, and I respect that. I even appreciate it, because we can all always stand to learn something new.
Now about this deal of prioritizing convenience over delicious food, you couldn't possibly be more wrong. You don't get to decide what is delicious to me, or anyone else, in the same way I don't get to decide on that for you. I eat a lot of different kinds of food, from cheap fast food, to standard sit-down style restaurants, to homecooked meals, to 5 star cuisine, and I'll tell you right now, I'll take a greasy plate of french fries smothered in cheese and chili and bacon and ranch dressing over a pretty piece of steak or chicken or fish and greens any day of the week, and twice on Sunday. I don't care about convenience. I enjoy cooking, which is another thing that everyone in this topic seems to think just doesn't happen when people eat a bunch of bad food. I can make a 2000 calorie dish as well or better than any restaurant can.
[Edited by MFP Staff]6 -
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Everyone has fark it days
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LiminalAscendance wrote: »Again, I'm not asking you for help, I'm just making conversation about how much it F#*$&%@ sucks.
Yeah, quite often the responses here are meant to illuminate the hordes that are scrambling aimlessly in ignorance, and aren't really attempting to address the OP.
Don't take it personally.
God forbid we try to help when the post is made in the forum "general weight loss help". It's not like this is the motivation section...
This. If it was posted in the Motivation/Support thread maybe you would have gotten the responses you wanted. The Help thread is usually for people looking for help. And is often frequented by lurkers who are not the OP and also looking for help.
FYI, OP I enjoy my food too. I don't just eat because I'm hungry - food is one of the great joys of life. But I have taken the last couple of years and learned how to structure my diet so that I don't have to think too much, I don't have to spend too much, I definitely LOVE what I eat, and I'm at the correct calorie level too. With all due respect, if all you're eating is a lot of fast food, candy, and soda, experimenting a little with food will get you to a diet that is WAY more yummy and with WAY less calories. You aren't prioritizing delicious food, you're prioritizing convenience.
Sorry I couldn't commiserate, but best of luck.
I wasn't going to respond to this when I read the first paragraph, but since the second one was so ridiculous I'll go ahead and hit both.
I understand there are lurkers, and I understand that the people who were trying to help maybe weren't talking to me but just everyone in general, and I respect that. I even appreciate it, because we can all always stand to learn something new. It's the people who were being pricks that I'd like to give a big "F#&$ YOU!" to.
Now about this deal of prioritizing convenience over delicious food, you couldn't possibly be more wrong. You don't get to decide what is delicious to me, or anyone else, in the same way I don't get to decide on that for you. I eat a lot of different kinds of food, from cheap fast food, to standard sit-down style restaurants, to homecooked meals, to 5 star cuisine, and I'll tell you right now, I'll take a greasy plate of french fries smothered in cheese and chili and bacon and ranch dressing over a pretty piece of steak or chicken or fish and greens any day of the week, and twice on Sunday. I don't care about convenience. I enjoy cooking, which is another thing that everyone in this topic seems to think just doesn't happen when people eat a bunch of bad food. I can make a 2000 calorie dish as well or better than any restaurant can.
I feel singled out.0 -
LiminalAscendance wrote: »Again, I'm not asking you for help, I'm just making conversation about how much it F#*$&%@ sucks.
Yeah, quite often the responses here are meant to illuminate the hordes that are scrambling aimlessly in ignorance, and aren't really attempting to address the OP.
Don't take it personally.
God forbid we try to help when the post is made in the forum "general weight loss help". It's not like this is the motivation section...
This. If it was posted in the Motivation/Support thread maybe you would have gotten the responses you wanted. The Help thread is usually for people looking for help. And is often frequented by lurkers who are not the OP and also looking for help.
FYI, OP I enjoy my food too. I don't just eat because I'm hungry - food is one of the great joys of life. But I have taken the last couple of years and learned how to structure my diet so that I don't have to think too much, I don't have to spend too much, I definitely LOVE what I eat, and I'm at the correct calorie level too. With all due respect, if all you're eating is a lot of fast food, candy, and soda, experimenting a little with food will get you to a diet that is WAY more yummy and with WAY less calories. You aren't prioritizing delicious food, you're prioritizing convenience.
Sorry I couldn't commiserate, but best of luck.
I wasn't going to respond to this when I read the first paragraph, but since the second one was so ridiculous I'll go ahead and hit both.
I understand there are lurkers, and I understand that the people who were trying to help maybe weren't talking to me but just everyone in general, and I respect that. I even appreciate it, because we can all always stand to learn something new. It's the people who were being pricks that I'd like to give a big "F#&$ YOU!" to.
Now about this deal of prioritizing convenience over delicious food, you couldn't possibly be more wrong. You don't get to decide what is delicious to me, or anyone else, in the same way I don't get to decide on that for you. I eat a lot of different kinds of food, from cheap fast food, to standard sit-down style restaurants, to homecooked meals, to 5 star cuisine, and I'll tell you right now, I'll take a greasy plate of french fries smothered in cheese and chili and bacon and ranch dressing over a pretty piece of steak or chicken or fish and greens any day of the week, and twice on Sunday. I don't care about convenience. I enjoy cooking, which is another thing that everyone in this topic seems to think just doesn't happen when people eat a bunch of bad food. I can make a 2000 calorie dish as well or better than any restaurant can.
Your choice.
Continue to eat like you have been ~~>> remain the over weight man you have been.
Eat better 80% of the time ~~>> lose weight - finally. After years of struggle.
It is so worth it to make these changes. Is it a perfect world (according to jdb) ~~>>No.
No one here really has any say in this. It's your life. Stay big. Your choice. ::shrug::3 -
I would like to see a listing of the food you ate that tallied 4500 calories.
I just cannot fathom that many calories in a day.
@Resistive Off topic but, if you ask, you get. I'm a 5'5" woman, this was a deliberate day off from my food plan (but not logging) so if you ignore my fitbit adjustment that's all food I scarfed, and I skipped lunch
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I would like to see a listing of the food you ate that tallied 4500 calories.
I just cannot fathom that many calories in a day.
@Resistive Off topic but, if you ask, you get. I'm a 5'5" woman, this was a deliberate day off from my food plan (but not logging) so if you ignore my fitbit adjustment that's all food I scarfed, and I skipped lunch
Holy cow! Is that an accurate tally for 5/8 of a medium dominos cheese pizza??1 -
Sabine_Stroehm wrote: »I would like to see a listing of the food you ate that tallied 4500 calories.
I just cannot fathom that many calories in a day.
@Resistive Off topic but, if you ask, you get. I'm a 5'5" woman, this was a deliberate day off from my food plan (but not logging) so if you ignore my fitbit adjustment that's all food I scarfed, and I skipped lunch
Holy cow! Is that an accurate tally for 5/8 of a medium dominos cheese pizza??
Yea, I know... I was thinking it was way too low until I went back and noticed the bolded part.2 -
I would like to see a listing of the food you ate that tallied 4500 calories.
I just cannot fathom that many calories in a day.
It's not that difficult... I've seen folks hit 7000+ on a holiday like Christmas or Thanksgiving.
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The_Enginerd wrote: »
You logged altoids. Now thats dedication. haha11 -
Wow I could never imagine eating 4500 I would explode haha I even struggle eating 2000!1
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