It's long and boring but I needed to post it...
lauramdx4
Posts: 33 Member
It was about 15 years ago today that my weight became a HUGE problem. (No pun intended) I was always overweight but when I quit smoking...I became a lot more than just overweight. I quit smoking in September 2001 and unfortunately something small and sweet took the place of a cigarette...1 or 2 M&Ms were the best! Then Halloween came....I had 3 young girls and now a house FULL of candy... i probably don't need to finish that part of the story because I'm sure you know the ending because I'm posting on My Fitness Pal.... anyhow here is my pity party..I had a tough day at school ( I am a kindergarten teacher and it is the day after Halloween... who wouldn't have a rough day) I came home...and my son who went trick or treating with friends last night decides it's a great time to count his candy. Long story short, he is down about 20 fun size candy bars because I couldn't stop myself! I feel guilty and I feel like every pound of the 73 I have lost will be back tomorrow when I step on the scale. I know, tomorrow is a new day but this is the first time on this 10 month journey that I have felt this way... I hate that I ate that candy and worse yet, scared that what I did 15 years ago by gaining 100 pounds has just begun again. I'm writing this post in hopes that being able to read it back to myself will help in some way. And if you are reading this, thanks for coming to my pity party.
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Replies
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Every pound wont come back tomorrow and all you can do now is move forward making better choices.
I'm a recovering bulimic. Most days I am good. But occasionally I have had binges. When this happens I consider myself a success if I can stop myself from purging and just keep going the next day with my healthier life. None of us are perfect and I believe most of us have some work to do around our relationship with food.
Congrats on all of the weight that youve lost and on quitting smoking. In the big picture those accomplishments are a much bigger deal than one bad day of eating.19 -
I think you need to focus on your achievements, firstly quitting smoking which is the best thing you could have done for yourself! Congratulations! The weight loss is also a major accomplishment. Don't be so down on yourself! Tomorrow is another day! If you eat in deficit for the rest of the week those candies may not even matter! So get back on that horse, brush today off and try to work on allowing yourself a small treat every now and then so you don't feel deprived8
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Hey, fun size bars are usually only about 90 calories...so only about 1800 cals for 20. (I know, ONLY) Which means, if you don't burn off that many extra this week, less than a pound. I wouldn't make a habit of it but Halloween only happens once a year. Don't overstress, that way leads to comfort eating...take a couple extra walks with the kiddo-he'll need it, too!7
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I agree, you've stopped yourself in the act. Draw a line under it, make a plan for the next week or even day. ..and update in a weeks time when you've stayed the same or lost a little. You can do this, everyone has blips.4
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Have a plan for slip ups. A slip up will not derail you unless you let it go to a full blown derailment. We ALL have slip ups because, HELLO, we are human, not perfect. First shift your mind set. You might be thinking "I always do this! I'm a loser! I can't do this", which is ridiculous when you've already lost 70 lbs, it's obvious that you do NOT always do this and you are a winner, not a loser! Instead, think "I've got this, I can do this, I am already doing this". Have a plan ready made for slip ups. Drink lots of water, feed yourself some especially nutritious food, take a walk, whatever makes you feel healthier and more "self cared" for, yes, care for yourself a little bit better, and be kinder to yourself for awhile. You can do this, you ARE doing this.3
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I'm always slipping up but I haven't gained much weight back in 2.5 years. The fear is still there though. Just log it and get back on track.3
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Congratulations on your success so far. One slip up won't ruin your hard work. You have owned it, now move on. Today is a brand new day!2
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It was about 15 years ago today that my weight became a HUGE problem. (No pun intended) I was always overweight but when I quit smoking...I became a lot more than just overweight. I quit smoking in September 2001 and unfortunately something small and sweet took the place of a cigarette...1 or 2 M&Ms were the best! Then Halloween came....I had 3 young girls and now a house FULL of candy... i probably don't need to finish that part of the story because I'm sure you know the ending because I'm posting on My Fitness Pal.... anyhow here is my pity party..I had a tough day at school ( I am a kindergarten teacher and it is the day after Halloween... who wouldn't have a rough day) I came home...and my son who went trick or treating with friends last night decides it's a great time to count his candy. Long story short, he is down about 20 fun size candy bars because I couldn't stop myself! I feel guilty and I feel like every pound of the 73 I have lost will be back tomorrow when I step on the scale. I know, tomorrow is a new day but this is the first time on this 10 month journey that I have felt this way... I hate that I ate that candy and worse yet, scared that what I did 15 years ago by gaining 100 pounds has just begun again. I'm writing this post in hopes that being able to read it back to myself will help in some way. And if you are reading this, thanks for coming to my pity party.
I've gone to the emergency room twice in my life because of migraines caused by too much chocolate people at work left as gifts on my desk during the holidays. Yes, I knew I could get sick, but I ate it anyway -- and threw up from migraines for three days. I know all about the self-control thing with sugar, but I have never been able to do that and have to face those facts. I don't have kids so I can control what food I have in my house (no Halloween candy).
I don't have an answer. I just want to say I feel for you. And yes, I feel things like this can cause a slide back into bad health. Make today a new day. Remind yourself of all you went through and that you have chosen to have a better life.4 -
I know that scared feeling of being on a slippery slope back. You're not though. You recognize it as an unhealthy behavior, you owned up to it, & now you can move on.
Maybe next time, if it doesn't undo your work in building good habits, give yourself permission for one or two & fit it into your calories.1 -
You acknowledged it. People on here won't let you slide. We're all here for each other. 10 mos and the loss is awesome. Acknowledged, known, move on. Hey, this is your first Halloween, don't comedown hard, that might just lead to more of the bad. Keep healthy2
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20 fun sized candy bars doesn't contain enough calories to cause even one pound of fat gain. You may experience water weight gain from that binge but you certainly aren't going to gain 20 lbs of fat from it.
Put it behind you and move forward. You can't change the past so there is no point in dwelling on it. The future is within your control. That should be your focus.3 -
Next year put aside 2 bars and tell yourself that's your limit. As for "damage control" now, be sure you log it and move on. This happens to us all. The biggest worry is that you're terrified you'll give up. You need confidence that you can do this long term. The more you beat yourself up, the worse it will be. Best of luck.1
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As others mentioned, you only ate enough to gain ~ 1/2 pound of actual fat. Get right back on track. Don't look at the scale or you might see "fake" gain due to glycogen replenishment. Water binds to glycogen so you will see a woosh up for about 3 days. As you consume the glycogen the water weight will pop back off. Don't let this little blip derail you!1
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You've repented and publicly confessed.
Apologize to the kid for eating his candy. Buy him a small toy to make amends. Then get the heck back on the wagon and get moving.
I'm as guilty as you, but wallowing in guilt just makes it worse in my experience.3 -
You had a bad day, it happens to all of us and will probably happen again. But as I say to my friend yes you fell off the wagon but there is no need to smash the wagon into tiny pieces and use it for fire wood. Acknowledge what happened, climb back on that wagon and see how much you have already accomplished. You can do it.6
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Count the calories of what you ate.. and burn it off with exercise. Teach your subconscious mind that for every action there is an equal or greater reaction. So instead of feeling sorry for yourself.. get your rear on the elliptical for a total of 2 hours. Break up the time. .do what you must.. But work it off.. and then you won't have any reason for a pity party.1
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melaniedscott wrote: »Hey, fun size bars are usually only about 90 calories...so only about 1800 cals for 20. (I know, ONLY) Which means, if you don't burn off that many extra this week, less than a pound. I wouldn't make a habit of it but Halloween only happens once a year. Don't overstress, that way leads to comfort eating...take a couple extra walks with the kiddo-he'll need it, too!
This. It's actually not that big of a deal. I remember when I was in my active weight loss phase we had an out of town wedding and the weekend was spent eating very large portions of calorie dense foods. The guilt was wicked after it was all done, but the crazy thing was I only actually gained about .5lb and it was gone again within a few days of me getting back on task.
This is a life time thing and you're going to have lots of great moments and then a few not so great ones. The important thing is to not let this moment drag you down to the point where you feel like a failure and then stop trying. You've made amazing progress so far and this is just a little blip. Pick yourself up and then move on
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elisa123gal wrote: »Count the calories of what you ate.. and burn it off with exercise. Teach your subconscious mind that for every action there is an equal or greater reaction. So instead of feeling sorry for yourself.. get your rear on the elliptical for a total of 2 hours. Break up the time. .do what you must.. But work it off.. and then you won't have any reason for a pity party.
Or the OP could just keep on with her regular plan, knowing that a few extra calories here and there isn't going to do any real harm to her weight loss goals. It kind of sounds like you're advocating using exercise as a form of punishment, that's a pretty unhealthy way to go about things.8 -
I totally get where you're coming from. Occasions like Halloween usually cause me to fall off the wagon, and once I'm off I get in a downward spiral. I feel like, hey, I already totally ruined my eating for the day, might as well eat 20 more pieces of candy! And the next day, and the next.... This year, I'm dreading this holiday season but I'm going to try REALLY hard to do what others are telling you to do: log it and move on without derailing all your progress. Today is a new day. You can do it!! Thanks for sharing and just know you're not alone. Plus, you've come so far. Be proud of yourself!!1
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What you are doing now is better than what you were doing before, right? You already lost 73 lbs, great job! So there's a hiccup here and there, it's not a big deal if you get back to eating healthy the next day. I had 6 pieces of candy on Halloween and it added up to 350 calories, and had 2 pieces of pizza (520 calories!). I was over my calorie goal for the day. But if I hadn't been tracking what I was eating, I know I would've eaten over a dozen candies and probably an extra piece of pizza and a few bread sticks. Holidays are tough!2
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Would you chastise a friend as harshly as you've done to yourself for such a slip? Stop it. Focus on your accomplishments, shake it off, and move on.4
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Slips happen! Just log in the calories, and don't do it too often. Keep up the good habits you've built over the long term and don't let a slip derail you. Fortunately Halloween candy snatching is a once a year event... I am avoiding grocery shopping this week because I know I would come home with mini peanut butter cups because they were "on sale." That is one thing I cannot exercise any portion control over.
I would apologize to the kid though - I still remember my parents "stealing" my candy. So I would hide it. Way too well. Ask about the ants (or maybe don't).3 -
I wouldn't follow the advice to punish yourself to workout in compensation for those calories. Just move on. You've acknowledged what happened, we all do things we kick ourselves for afterwards, it's just part of being human. No-one can be "perfect" all the time. And frankly, to go 10 months before this happened is quite amazing!5
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I agree with the rest..just move one don't have anymore and stay on track. You have done well and will continue too. I know how it is, I've slipped in the past and my attitude back then was oh geez..the next day I would do it again till I stopped weighing every day stopped logging and gained my weight back. This time around I know I am human, I will have a slip and though I will try not too but I will continue to log, weigh and be accountable. Its done, over now lets all do this together! We can do it.1
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I think it safe to say.......we all slip......this is a life Journey with all kinds of challenges, just learn to forgive yourself and continue on. Something hopefully you can teach to your children? btw ~ Congratulations!! 73# is Amazing!!!!!
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I did the same thing! I ate about 12-15 of those fun size bars, along with some Reese's pb cups, and felt sick the next day! I also felt a little bad about the calories, but then I thought about how it's taken me 3.5 months (100 days) to lose 15 lbs--they're not going to go back on in one night!
Or, you can also look at it this way: the 73 lbs you've lost so far represent losing 255,500 calories worth of (mostly) fat. Is 1800 calories or so in one night really going to affect much? No, especially if you pick yourself up and get back to your deficit (or maintenance or whatever) the next day.4 -
I understand why you don't want to just disregard this experience. I've lost weight and then gained all or most of it back a number of times, and it sucks. You've been very successful at losing the weight (-73 pounds is an amazing accomplishment!), and you naturally want to keep it off.
It seems to me that your post here is a good kind of penance: You've publicly acknowledged that you regret having eaten so much candy at one time, so you're very unlikely to do it again soon. In a sense, you're holding yourself accountable in a way that lets you move on. Very smart!
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I recently had a weekend like this. Olive Garden gets me every time. I started to feel the slippery slope thing too because it happened 2x in a row but this week I've been back on track and have accepted that times like this will inevitably happen. I ended up around maintenence for the week. At first I thought "Maintenance? Noooo!!" And then I thought about where I came from. I didn't gain. I knew there were still limits in place and dammit that Chicken Alfredo and gnocchi soup was delicious! Free yourself of the guilt and continue your journey. There is no race to the finish line when there isn't one. This is our new way of life. Forever. And I promise I'll be eating at Olive Garden more during this lifetime.
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I hope you replace his candy bars:):) JOKE- You will be fine the stress of this event is probably burning those calories as I type.. lol-- Just get back onboard tomorrow look yourself in the mirror and say " I GOT THIS" Good Luck2
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Ditch the guilt as it serves no purpose.
Don't let a small relapse become a collapse!
You are a winner because you made the choice to lose weight and get health.
As many before have said... today is a new day. Any weight gain is likely to be water.... make sure you drink, drink, drink lots of water for a few days.
I'm just back off holiday with my son & family. A week of two glasses of wine a night and a few lapses saw a kg arrive. Got back to my usual ways and within a week it's gone.
You can do this :-)1
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