What should I do?

Angela937
Angela937 Posts: 514 Member
One of my regular hook ups said we're headed towards relationship status. That would be nice to have with him..... some day. But I'm just not there yet. How do I let him know to slow it down without completely breaking it off?
«1

Replies

  • Angela937
    Angela937 Posts: 514 Member
    He knows. I see 3 guys pretty regularly, and he is aware of that.
  • This content has been removed.
  • Angela937
    Angela937 Posts: 514 Member
    He sees other women as well, we're not exclusive.
  • Angela937
    Angela937 Posts: 514 Member
    Louise1491 wrote: »
    You could vomit on him?

    That didn't deter the other guy. He's still hitting me up!
  • Angela937
    Angela937 Posts: 514 Member
    newmeadow wrote: »
    Maybe remind him that you're still married.

    He knows I am married, but separated and filing.
  • Angela937
    Angela937 Posts: 514 Member
    Do you keep some sort of schedule?

    No schedules. Just whenever someone is available and the timing works out.
  • eva_letsdance
    eva_letsdance Posts: 2,731 Member
    Angela937 wrote: »
    One of my regular hook ups said we're headed towards relationship status. That would be nice to have with him..... some day. But I'm just not there yet. How do I let him know to slow it down without completely breaking it off?

    Tell him you don't want a relationship... simple

    Yup this one above. Short and truthful.
  • vikinglander
    vikinglander Posts: 1,547 Member
    Honesty is ALWAYS the best policy. If you want the freedom to do what (or who...) you want, and he wants exclusivity, it probably won't work out. But at least you'll maintain your independence.

    This reminds me of a guy I used to hang with in the 80s, who was single and dating casually, who said to one of his dates, "Ah Baby, don't worry, you're Number One on my list...!"

    She said, "If I'm gonna be Number One, there ain't gonna be no list!"

    Long days and pleasant nights, Angela...
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,782 Member
    So he wants to be promoted from FB to BF....
  • jvcjim
    jvcjim Posts: 812 Member
    sit him down and start talking wedding plans with him; that should slow him down.
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,730 Member
    Seriously. Just tell him the truth.
  • This content has been removed.
  • Angela937
    Angela937 Posts: 514 Member
    Thanks guys. My main concern is making him feel bad, bc I really like him. He's the one I would want a relationship with when the time is right. I just don't want to mess things up.
  • LizIsBack86
    LizIsBack86 Posts: 61 Member
    Be honest and tell him what is right and how you feel..
    Let him know I do not want to get serious, slow down!!!
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    What's your trick?? I can't get one man let alone 3 lmao

    Depends what sort of man you want. Finding men for casual sex is pretty easy IMO
  • JeromeBarry1
    JeromeBarry1 Posts: 10,179 Member
    Tell him that desperation is unbecoming and if he wants to be coming over he needs to slow it down.
  • Angela937
    Angela937 Posts: 514 Member
    What's your trick?? I can't get one man let alone 3 lmao

    Depends what sort of man you want. Finding men for casual sex is pretty easy IMO

    Yep, any guy will jump at the chance for casual sex. But that's not how I ended up with my guys. Two I met on Tinder, and one from a dance club while I was really drunk!
  • bblue656
    bblue656 Posts: 159 Member
    Teach me your ways! I cant even get a guy to take me seriously :(
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    Angela937 wrote: »
    What's your trick?? I can't get one man let alone 3 lmao

    Depends what sort of man you want. Finding men for casual sex is pretty easy IMO

    Yep, any guy will jump at the chance for casual sex. But that's not how I ended up with my guys. Two I met on Tinder, and one from a dance club while I was really drunk!

    You have illustrated my point perfectly! :laugh:
  • Angela937
    Angela937 Posts: 514 Member
    How can you commit to a faithful long term relationship when you practice concurrent hook-ups?

    Well that's my point. I'm not ready for a relationship. I just got out of a 15 year relationship a few months ago, I'm not jumping back into a new one.
  • Angela937
    Angela937 Posts: 514 Member
    Angela937 wrote: »
    What's your trick?? I can't get one man let alone 3 lmao

    Depends what sort of man you want. Finding men for casual sex is pretty easy IMO

    Yep, any guy will jump at the chance for casual sex. Two I met on Tinder, and one from a dance club while I was really drunk!

    I just took that middle sentence out. It was out of place.

    Touche!
  • Angela937
    Angela937 Posts: 514 Member
    138shades wrote: »
    you kind of remind me of that one girl on 90day fiancée.

    Is that a movie?