Has anyone successfully managed to switch to a higher weight maintenance?
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Relax your eating and you may be surprised. I have noticed that the difference between reasonably relaxed and significantly strained for me averages at no more than 100 something calories. For me, when I decide to relax after a strict period, it starts looking high ast first but levels down to something that isn't too much worse than my strict goal to the point where I wonder why did I even bother going strict? Maybe the constant effort is inadvertently causing you to desire more food than would otherwise be enough to satisfy?
If you feel you won't be able to sustain this and are going to gain weight anyway, why not just give it a month or two of relaxed effort where you just observe without trying to tightly control? Doesn't mean going all out, but just relax enough to where it feels comfortably doable, eating to reasonable satisfaction, recording your calories after you are satisfied and see where your monthly calories tend to average with a sustainable effort level.5 -
I love this quote. Focus on creating a healthy life you can enjoy and let your weight settles where it may. Make sure you live happy, if you aren't you won't be able to maintain it long term.
Dr Yoni Freedhoff
"Best weight” is a non-statistical goal that is easy to set and easy to explain to patients. Patients can diet themselves down to any weight they put their minds to, but to maintain that weight, they need to actually enjoy the lifestyle that got them there.
A patient’s best weight is therefore whatever weight they achieve while living the healthiest lifestyle they can truly enjoy. There comes a point when a person cannot eat less or exercise more and still like their life. The weight they attain while still liking their life is thus their “best” weight, as without the addition of pharmacotherapy or a surgical intervention, no further weight loss will be possible.
We need to remember that in modern society, eating is not simply about survival. We use food for comfort and for celebration and, with the exception of religious prohibitions, there should be no forbidden foods. If your patient cannot use food to comfort or celebrate, or if they consider certain foods “forbidden,” then they are likely on a diet, and unfortunately diets are known to fail over 95% of the time. For sustainable weight management, a patient should be consuming the smallest number of calories that still allows them to enjoy each day. Some days will simply warrant more calories, such as birthdays, anniversaries, religious holidays, and days when injuries, illness or fights with loved ones occur. Simply put, ice-cream and cookies and their cultural and ethnic equivalents are vital parts of a rich life experience.
With exercise, a patient should be encouraged to be as physically active as possible and include as much additional exercise as they can enjoy each day. Some days obviously will allow for more activity than others, but there is a maximum, above which the patient would run out of time or energy, hurt themselves or come to hate exercise. That is when they quit. Eating less and exercising more within the context of a life the patient does not enjoy is the very definition of a diet, which is why diets almost always fail over the long-term. If a patient does not enjoy the way they are living while they are losing weight, they will almost certainly revert to “normal” practices and gain the weight back.13 -
I'm currently in an eating disorder because I'm all over the place I will get to 190lbs then drop back down to 175 in a week. My issue is I'm addicted to this damm stepper challenges where my groups are averaging 20,000 plus steps a day and I have to win. I just need to eat more calories. Two years 178-190 but ya no where near a 5lbs medium I would like to be at..0
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Michael190lbs wrote: »I'm currently in an eating disorder because I'm all over the place I will get to 190lbs then drop back down to 175 in a week. My issue is I'm addicted to this damm stepper challenges where my groups are averaging 20,000 plus steps a day and I have to win. I just need to eat more calories. Two years 178-190 but ya no where near a 5lbs medium I would like to be at..
Haha I can totally relate to that. I got to a stage where i deleted all of my fitbit friends, because the challenges were taking over my life, and they seemed to be filled with people who averaged 40k steps every bloody day of the week
Now i have just a few friends with similar step goals as myself. 5 -
It's all about establishing maintenance calories, during your weightloss I'm willing to bet you went from eating a bunch to an extreme deficit to lose the weight.
A lot of people make this mistake, for some reason we're programmed to believe that eating less means losing weight faster, and it can but in the long run it hurts you because now you're stuck with ridiculously low maintenance calories.
Increase your calories by 3-500 workout a little harder and see what happens after 4-6 weeks, don't weigh yourself daily, do it once a week and don't add 3-500 calories of junk add more veggies and healthy foods... this will help your body "reset" so that you can maintain your desired weight give or take a few pounds while having a more satisfying diet, and if you ever want to drop any smaller then it allows you to go on a smaller caloric deficit
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I think I'm starting to realize that it might just not possible for me to maintain 135 pounds. I'm just too hungry and miserable because the only way to maintain is to really deprive myself...
Has anyone been in the same situation, gained back a few pounds, then managed to maintain that weight successfully? I'm hoping that maybe my hunger will calm down if I gain a couple pounds back? My main worry obviously is that I'll end up gaining the weight back because the hunger won't go away (I've been around 133-135 for 2.5 years now). I'm 5'5" so it's hardly too little.
Man, I knew it would be hard, but I didn't except to be so miserable and worried all the time. I've hardly had any days when I'm not hungry in the last couple months (my cycles have been 3 weeks instead of 4, which totally sucks). I still hit my protein, fat, and fiber goals most days, but it seems that as soon as I eat a treat, even if it's just a 200 calorie one, I end up too hungry and end up going over by 200 at the end of the day.
I know that hunger isn't necessarily bad, but I get dizzy and just feel awful most of the time when I am (except that one week a month when it doesn't bother me, but that hasn't happened in 2 months now).
I don't believe my goal is too low but who knows? I've calculated my TDEE at 2200, but I don't seem to lose if I go under 2000, or to gain if eat 2300 for a week, so it's just confusing to me. I do 1.5 hour of cycling/uphill walking every day in average, some lifting 2x a week or less, with a rest day every 10 days or so, and other than that it's normal household work, cooking, groceries etc. I've been eating closer to 235-2400 calories a day for 2 weeks now (but I'm PMSing too, so there's that).
You'd think I would stress out less about it after this time.. but nope.
You've maintained at that calorie level for 2.5 years. However, it's only been hard a couple of months? Could it be some hormonal changes causing this? You also mentioned a change in your menses? Have you seen your doctor?5 -
I think I'm starting to realize that it might just not possible for me to maintain 135 pounds. I'm just too hungry and miserable because the only way to maintain is to really deprive myself...
Has anyone been in the same situation, gained back a few pounds, then managed to maintain that weight successfully? I'm hoping that maybe my hunger will calm down if I gain a couple pounds back? My main worry obviously is that I'll end up gaining the weight back because the hunger won't go away (I've been around 133-135 for 2.5 years now). I'm 5'5" so it's hardly too little.
Man, I knew it would be hard, but I didn't except to be so miserable and worried all the time. I've hardly had any days when I'm not hungry in the last couple months (my cycles have been 3 weeks instead of 4, which totally sucks). I still hit my protein, fat, and fiber goals most days, but it seems that as soon as I eat a treat, even if it's just a 200 calorie one, I end up too hungry and end up going over by 200 at the end of the day.
I know that hunger isn't necessarily bad, but I get dizzy and just feel awful most of the time when I am (except that one week a month when it doesn't bother me, but that hasn't happened in 2 months now).
I don't believe my goal is too low but who knows? I've calculated my TDEE at 2200, but I don't seem to lose if I go under 2000, or to gain if eat 2300 for a week, so it's just confusing to me. I do 1.5 hour of cycling/uphill walking every day in average, some lifting 2x a week or less, with a rest day every 10 days or so, and other than that it's normal household work, cooking, groceries etc. I've been eating closer to 235-2400 calories a day for 2 weeks now (but I'm PMSing too, so there's that).
You'd think I would stress out less about it after this time.. but nope.
As to the bolded...that's because you don't have a TDEE of exactly XXXX calories...your maintenance calories are a range. Also, are you trying to stay at exactly 135 Lbs...that's pretty much impossible...body weight isn't static. Do you have a maintenance range or are you driving yourself bat *kitten* crazy trying to stay exactly one number.10 -
Others have said it, but you need to decide what's more important to you: maintaining a certain weight range and being hungry/miserable all the time, or gaining some weight and not being hungry/miserable all the time.10
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It's all about establishing maintenance calories, during your weightloss I'm willing to bet you went from eating a bunch to an extreme deficit to lose the weight.
A lot of people make this mistake, for some reason we're programmed to believe that eating less means losing weight faster, and it can but in the long run it hurts you because now you're stuck with ridiculously low maintenance calories.
Increase your calories by 3-500 workout a little harder and see what happens after 4-6 weeks, don't weigh yourself daily, do it once a week and don't add 3-500 calories of junk add more veggies and healthy foods... this will help your body "reset" so that you can maintain your desired weight give or take a few pounds while having a more satisfying diet, and if you ever want to drop any smaller then it allows you to go on a smaller caloric deficit
I didn't really. I went from 213 to 140 in 11 months, then it took me 6 months to lose 8 more (and I've gained 3 back since). I stopped losing altogether when I increased my exercise intensity (I also increased my calories by 200 then, but it shouldn't have been enough to make me maintain instead of losing. Oh well).
I haven't weighed myself in 3 months or something, lol. I go by how my clothes fit, and as far as I can tell, they still fit the same, but yeah... I'm eating more.leejoyce31 wrote: »I think I'm starting to realize that it might just not possible for me to maintain 135 pounds. I'm just too hungry and miserable because the only way to maintain is to really deprive myself...
Has anyone been in the same situation, gained back a few pounds, then managed to maintain that weight successfully? I'm hoping that maybe my hunger will calm down if I gain a couple pounds back? My main worry obviously is that I'll end up gaining the weight back because the hunger won't go away (I've been around 133-135 for 2.5 years now). I'm 5'5" so it's hardly too little.
Man, I knew it would be hard, but I didn't except to be so miserable and worried all the time. I've hardly had any days when I'm not hungry in the last couple months (my cycles have been 3 weeks instead of 4, which totally sucks). I still hit my protein, fat, and fiber goals most days, but it seems that as soon as I eat a treat, even if it's just a 200 calorie one, I end up too hungry and end up going over by 200 at the end of the day.
I know that hunger isn't necessarily bad, but I get dizzy and just feel awful most of the time when I am (except that one week a month when it doesn't bother me, but that hasn't happened in 2 months now).
I don't believe my goal is too low but who knows? I've calculated my TDEE at 2200, but I don't seem to lose if I go under 2000, or to gain if eat 2300 for a week, so it's just confusing to me. I do 1.5 hour of cycling/uphill walking every day in average, some lifting 2x a week or less, with a rest day every 10 days or so, and other than that it's normal household work, cooking, groceries etc. I've been eating closer to 235-2400 calories a day for 2 weeks now (but I'm PMSing too, so there's that).
You'd think I would stress out less about it after this time.. but nope.
You've maintained at that calorie level for 2.5 years. However, it's only been hard a couple of months? Could it be some hormonal changes causing this? You also mentioned a change in your menses? Have you seen your doctor?
It's been a hard two years, lol! I remember that last year at this time was hard too. I guess PMS and Holidays are always making it hard (and I went to a wedding last year at that time too). But yes, I usually had a good week when I wasn't very hungry, now it's 2/3 days a month if I'm lucky.
My doctor appointment is in 2 weeks though... but I know she never sweats it as I'm her only patient who has actually stayed in the normal BMI range for over 2 years after losing close to 80 lbs...0 -
Look up reverse dieting. Basically, it's a gradual increase in calories to allow your metabolism to properly adapt. It's how I move from 1950 calories/day (cutting calories) to 2500 calories/day (maintenance calories) with little to no weight gain (generally .5 to 1 pound at most). Far too many people try to just increase their daily intake by 5-600 calories all at once, and are shocked when they put on ten pounds in a month.6
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Is gaining a little weight going to make a massive difference to your appearance in the mirror? That might be another thing you might want to think about which could help you not to focus on the scale number.
But I agree with the other posters. In my experience I wasn't happy with the number of calories I was allotted to sustain a particular number. I played around with my numbers and I'm much happier maintaining on a higher calorie diet. And it hasn't had a huge impact on my appearance which I was more concerned about.
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Is gaining a little weight going to make a massive difference to your appearance in the mirror? That might be another thing you might want to think about which could help you not to focus on the scale number.
Good point! I still wear the same size jeans as i did 5-6lbs ago, they are a bit more snug, but not stupid tight. I don't walk around looking like Herman Munster or anything
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Check out the EM2WL group - Eat More 2 Weigh Less. There's heaps of information about what you're experiencing. You're exercising too much for the number of calories you're consuming. There's a TDEE calculator at the top of the EM2WL group page, that I'd recommend you punch your details in and see if they are higher. And check the definitions for activity levels - I think you're very active. You're probably eating below or around BMR rather than TDEE...3
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When I was nursing my daughter I dropped weight like I never have. She refused solids for her first year and gained over 15 pounds from her birthweight, and it was hard for my body to keep up with her.
I'm 5'10' and prior to having her I'd been about 180, but a very active and fit 180.
While nursing her, I noticed that every time my weight dropped below 175, it was like this switch flipped in my brain. I was *crazy* starving and would find myself in front of the fridge eating cheese and eggs and meat. As long as I was above 175 - even a pound? That didn't happen.
I'd try reverse-dieting to a slightly higher weight and see if you feel better. It might literally only take a pound or two to flip *your* switch3 -
HappyGrape wrote: »I love this quote. Focus on creating a healthy life you can enjoy and let your weight settles where it may. Make sure you live happy, if you aren't you won't be able to maintain it long term.
Dr Yoni Freedhoff
I loved this quote so much that I put it in my bullet journal to remind myself every day.
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I think you'll be a lot happier if you put a few pounds back on. I dropped my weight a bit too low and felt absolutely horrible. After I gained 4lbs back I felt like a different person. I'm shorter than you are, so yeah....I did see that 4lbs a bit, but I still looked fine. It wasn't enough to have me busting out of my pants (they still fit me) and the change in my outlook was worth it. What's the point if it's such a struggle to maintain and is making you feel so bad? This isn't just about the scale number or size of our pants. It's bout being healthy. Physically and mentally!2
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I think you'll be a lot happier if you put a few pounds back on. I dropped my weight a bit too low and felt absolutely horrible. After I gained 4lbs back I felt like a different person. I'm shorter than you are, so yeah....I did see that 4lbs a bit, but I still looked fine. It wasn't enough to have me busting out of my pants (they still fit me) and the change in my outlook was worth it. What's the point if it's such a struggle to maintain and is making you feel so bad? This isn't just about the scale number or size of our pants. It's bout being healthy. Physically and mentally!
Yeah I agree.
And you know, I just don't get it. Yesterday I had a 600 calorie deficit and I'm not even kidding, more than 60% of my calories were from some bits of brownie and chocolate chip cookie bars (I've been baking for a bake sale for the school, so I had to sample the stuff, and obviously someone had to lick the spoons, you know). I had a ham, cheese and egg low carb tortilla for breakfast (255 calories), some Amy lean mac'n cheese for lunch (290 calories and it's tiny!), and 2 cups of chicken noodle soup for dinner (180 calories). And I wasn't hungry at all. And TOM is still due soon. And I did 15 miles on my stationary bike and was on my feet most of the day.
My body needs to make up its mind. I'm still not hungry today either and it's 9am!0 -
I think you'll be a lot happier if you put a few pounds back on. I dropped my weight a bit too low and felt absolutely horrible. After I gained 4lbs back I felt like a different person. I'm shorter than you are, so yeah....I did see that 4lbs a bit, but I still looked fine. It wasn't enough to have me busting out of my pants (they still fit me) and the change in my outlook was worth it. What's the point if it's such a struggle to maintain and is making you feel so bad? This isn't just about the scale number or size of our pants. It's bout being healthy. Physically and mentally!
Yeah I agree.
And you know, I just don't get it. Yesterday I had a 600 calorie deficit and I'm not even kidding, more than 60% of my calories were from some bits of brownie and chocolate chip cookie bars (I've been baking for a bake sale for the school, so I had to sample the stuff, and obviously someone had to lick the spoons, you know). I had a ham, cheese and egg low carb tortilla for breakfast (255 calories), some Amy lean mac'n cheese for lunch (290 calories and it's tiny!), and 2 cups of chicken noodle soup for dinner (180 calories). And I wasn't hungry at all. And TOM is still due soon. And I did 15 miles on my stationary bike and was on my feet most of the day.
My body needs to make up its mind. I'm still not hungry today either and it's 9am!
@Francl27 maybe you had a high calorie day the previous day? I find if I eat high one day, I'm not hungry the next so eat at a higher deficit easily/naturally.0 -
YES! When I started off 4-5 years ago I wanted to maintain a 100-105 lb. figure. In the past year and a half I discovered heavy lifting and now I'm currently bulking and wish to maintain a 115-120 lb. figure but I try to not actually look at the scale that much (I honestly couldn't even tell you how much I weigh right now, haven't stepped on the scale since September) and if I end up at 125 lbs. or so I'd be okay with it! Goals change and that's okay. You want to make fitness and health a lifestyle, which means being happy and feeling good. If you don't feel good at 135 lbs. and think a slight increase would be more attainable for maintenance then that's what you gotta do!1
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I'm trying to say this as sensitively as I can, and I hope it doesn't come across as critical (because I sincerely do mean it in a caring way)...this isn't a healthy mindset, and it seems like it would be exhausting and stressful for you. It seems like you're making yourself live in a miserable place for a lot of the time, only for a number on the scale.TavistockToad wrote: »Yeah but that's the issue too though - I still have to be miserable and deprive myself to maintain a lower carb diet. I hate it! And it doesn't always work either, like 2 days ago I only had 11g of carbs for breakfast (from an apple! rest was eggs and sausage) and I was starving after 2 hours... I have to completely change my diet for it to work and it's really not a long term solution at all (plus I have to seriously deprive myself to do that. I like carbs. I still try to make them whole grains/fruit/veggies as much as possible).
I also was never able to handle too much fat (I would get diarrhea and/or stomach pains, two doctors never figured out what the problem was).
So yeah. Plus I can't wrap my head about the fact that I have to restrict more now than when I was losing.
so gain back to 140 and see how you get on and how that feels?
I am 136lbs as of today and losing slowly but consistently (my happy weight is 130-133ish), and can manage on around net 1900 to maintain.
being dizzy all the time doesn't sound right, i agree with see a doctor for that.
sounds like you need a break from the mental torture you have created for yourself.
Yeah but a break is not an option if I end up gaining weight...
I have to schedule my yearly check up though.
I absolutely understand being afraid of gaining all of the weight back. I lost about 80 pounds in my early 20s, down to my lowest of 112 (I'm 5'4"), and I was terrified that it would all come back. I really fixated on maintaining that number, but I didn't look my best, I certainly didn't feel good mentally, and I wasted a ton of time worrying about a number that only I saw.
I'm at 120 now, and I fit into the same jeans as I used to when I was 112. (Yay more muscle!). I've been maintaining my initial loss for 10 years, and depending on my goals I've been anywhere between 120 and 130 for the last 5 years. Within that range, I go up and down between a pant size, and nobody really notices unless I point it out.
Weight is part of health, but it's not the whole story. Our mental health is just as important as our physical health; you've done an amazing job of losing weight and improving your physical health, but maybe it's time to shift your focus onto decreasing your stress. You're not supposed to be hungry all the time, and it's not worth chasing that one particular number on the scale if you have to white-knuckle it the whole way.12
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