Has anyone successfully managed to switch to a higher weight maintenance?
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RunRutheeRun wrote: »I think you'll be a lot happier if you put a few pounds back on. I dropped my weight a bit too low and felt absolutely horrible. After I gained 4lbs back I felt like a different person. I'm shorter than you are, so yeah....I did see that 4lbs a bit, but I still looked fine. It wasn't enough to have me busting out of my pants (they still fit me) and the change in my outlook was worth it. What's the point if it's such a struggle to maintain and is making you feel so bad? This isn't just about the scale number or size of our pants. It's bout being healthy. Physically and mentally!
Yeah I agree.
And you know, I just don't get it. Yesterday I had a 600 calorie deficit and I'm not even kidding, more than 60% of my calories were from some bits of brownie and chocolate chip cookie bars (I've been baking for a bake sale for the school, so I had to sample the stuff, and obviously someone had to lick the spoons, you know). I had a ham, cheese and egg low carb tortilla for breakfast (255 calories), some Amy lean mac'n cheese for lunch (290 calories and it's tiny!), and 2 cups of chicken noodle soup for dinner (180 calories). And I wasn't hungry at all. And TOM is still due soon. And I did 15 miles on my stationary bike and was on my feet most of the day.
My body needs to make up its mind. I'm still not hungry today either and it's 9am!
@Francl27 maybe you had a high calorie day the previous day? I find if I eat high one day, I'm not hungry the next so eat at a higher deficit easily/naturally.
That almost never happens to me actually. My appetite/hunger level just seems completely random.
I had my first meal today at 11am. That never happens.
I'm trying to say this as sensitively as I can, and I hope it doesn't come across as critical (because I sincerely do mean it in a caring way)...this isn't a healthy mindset, and it seems like it would be exhausting and stressful for you. It seems like you're making yourself live in a miserable place for a lot of the time, only for a number on the scale.TavistockToad wrote: »Yeah but that's the issue too though - I still have to be miserable and deprive myself to maintain a lower carb diet. I hate it! And it doesn't always work either, like 2 days ago I only had 11g of carbs for breakfast (from an apple! rest was eggs and sausage) and I was starving after 2 hours... I have to completely change my diet for it to work and it's really not a long term solution at all (plus I have to seriously deprive myself to do that. I like carbs. I still try to make them whole grains/fruit/veggies as much as possible).
I also was never able to handle too much fat (I would get diarrhea and/or stomach pains, two doctors never figured out what the problem was).
So yeah. Plus I can't wrap my head about the fact that I have to restrict more now than when I was losing.
so gain back to 140 and see how you get on and how that feels?
I am 136lbs as of today and losing slowly but consistently (my happy weight is 130-133ish), and can manage on around net 1900 to maintain.
being dizzy all the time doesn't sound right, i agree with see a doctor for that.
sounds like you need a break from the mental torture you have created for yourself.
Yeah but a break is not an option if I end up gaining weight...
I have to schedule my yearly check up though.
I absolutely understand being afraid of gaining all of the weight back. I lost about 80 pounds in my early 20s, down to my lowest of 112 (I'm 5'4"), and I was terrified that it would all come back. I really fixated on maintaining that number, but I didn't look my best, I certainly didn't feel good mentally, and I wasted a ton of time worrying about a number that only I saw.
I'm at 120 now, and I fit into the same jeans as I used to when I was 112. (Yay more muscle!). I've been maintaining my initial loss for 10 years, and depending on my goals I've been anywhere between 120 and 130 for the last 5 years. Within that range, I go up and down between a pant size, and nobody really notices unless I point it out.
Weight is part of health, but it's not the whole story. Our mental health is just as important as our physical health; you've done an amazing job of losing weight and improving your physical health, but maybe it's time to shift your focus onto decreasing your stress. You're not supposed to be hungry all the time, and it's not worth chasing that one particular number on the scale if you have to white-knuckle it the whole way.
I know, and that's why I posted this thread. It's mentally exhausting. That being said, I'm 5'5" and 135 pounds so I'm definitely chunkier than you are (I do have a medium/large frame, but still). The issue too is that I'm not happy with the way I look, as all my fat is on my hips at this point (and belly, but there's so much loose skin that it actually looks worse if I lose there anyway), so it just looks odd in some outfits... plus with my shape I either get a muffin top or my jeans fall off, so it's frustrating as hell.0 -
RunRutheeRun wrote: »Am interested to see the feedback on this post ... I seem to have no trouble staying at 129/130lbs (I average 2000 cals which is a good amount for me at 5ft 2", any less and I feel deprived) but staying a few pounds lower for long periods just seems too much work - even more activity/less food does not make this gal a happy bunny!
Finding a happy medium is important imo.
We sound similar! I maintained mid 120's for a few years and it wasn't that hard but I did stress about it all the time due to body image issues. I'm 5'1" so technically I was still fat (LOL! Thanks society!)
If I'm not sitting on my a** all day long, 1800-2000 cals/day is maintenance for me too.
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Look up reverse dieting. Basically, it's a gradual increase in calories to allow your metabolism to properly adapt. It's how I move from 1950 calories/day (cutting calories) to 2500 calories/day (maintenance calories) with little to no weight gain (generally .5 to 1 pound at most). Far too many people try to just increase their daily intake by 5-600 calories all at once, and are shocked when they put on ten pounds in a month.
This! I did have to reset my metabolism however after falling into ED territory and starving myself for a year.
I kept being told to eat 2500 calories a day so I gained 15lbs.
Through monitoring weight, calories in & out (using MFP and a fitbit for averages) I found that I maintain on 1800-2000 a day.
It's SO IMPORTANT for us to find balance in all of this.0 -
I'm trying to say this as sensitively as I can, and I hope it doesn't come across as critical (because I sincerely do mean it in a caring way)...this isn't a healthy mindset, and it seems like it would be exhausting and stressful for you. It seems like you're making yourself live in a miserable place for a lot of the time, only for a number on the scale.TavistockToad wrote: »Yeah but that's the issue too though - I still have to be miserable and deprive myself to maintain a lower carb diet. I hate it! And it doesn't always work either, like 2 days ago I only had 11g of carbs for breakfast (from an apple! rest was eggs and sausage) and I was starving after 2 hours... I have to completely change my diet for it to work and it's really not a long term solution at all (plus I have to seriously deprive myself to do that. I like carbs. I still try to make them whole grains/fruit/veggies as much as possible).
I also was never able to handle too much fat (I would get diarrhea and/or stomach pains, two doctors never figured out what the problem was).
So yeah. Plus I can't wrap my head about the fact that I have to restrict more now than when I was losing.
so gain back to 140 and see how you get on and how that feels?
I am 136lbs as of today and losing slowly but consistently (my happy weight is 130-133ish), and can manage on around net 1900 to maintain.
being dizzy all the time doesn't sound right, i agree with see a doctor for that.
sounds like you need a break from the mental torture you have created for yourself.
Yeah but a break is not an option if I end up gaining weight...
I have to schedule my yearly check up though.
I absolutely understand being afraid of gaining all of the weight back. I lost about 80 pounds in my early 20s, down to my lowest of 112 (I'm 5'4"), and I was terrified that it would all come back. I really fixated on maintaining that number, but I didn't look my best, I certainly didn't feel good mentally, and I wasted a ton of time worrying about a number that only I saw.
I'm at 120 now, and I fit into the same jeans as I used to when I was 112. (Yay more muscle!). I've been maintaining my initial loss for 10 years, and depending on my goals I've been anywhere between 120 and 130 for the last 5 years. Within that range, I go up and down between a pant size, and nobody really notices unless I point it out.
Weight is part of health, but it's not the whole story. Our mental health is just as important as our physical health; you've done an amazing job of losing weight and improving your physical health, but maybe it's time to shift your focus onto decreasing your stress. You're not supposed to be hungry all the time, and it's not worth chasing that one particular number on the scale if you have to white-knuckle it the whole way.
I know, and that's why I posted this thread. It's mentally exhausting. That being said, I'm 5'5" and 135 pounds so I'm definitely chunkier than you are (I do have a medium/large frame, but still). The issue too is that I'm not happy with the way I look, as all my fat is on my hips at this point (and belly, but there's so much loose skin that it actually looks worse if I lose there anyway), so it just looks odd in some outfits... plus with my shape I either get a muffin top or my jeans fall off, so it's frustrating as hell.
Come over to the dark side and lift with us
I know you said earlier that you already lift a few days a week...do you enjoy it? What kind of a program are you doing? (I know you've been around MFP for a long time, so I apologize if you've already had this conversation a million times). I'm VERY biased toward lifting, because I love it, and because it has changed my shape quite a bit. (I'm not carrying as much fat on my hips as I used to, everything in general is much tighter, and even the loose skin on my lower stomach looks better because I have muscle underneath). Your post seems to point strongly toward "time for a recomp, and to focus on improving body composition instead of the number on the scale," but only if that sounds like something you would enjoy. The last thing you need is more body-focused stress.
What if you gave yourself a weight range (say, your CW +/- 5-8 pounds), and also tracked your measurements? (Not sure if you already do or not, but if you don't, you should start). Would it bother you if your weight went up a little but your measurements stayed the same? It shouldn't, but if the thought causes you anxiety, it's a flag that you're not in the best mental space.0 -
I'm trying to say this as sensitively as I can, and I hope it doesn't come across as critical (because I sincerely do mean it in a caring way)...this isn't a healthy mindset, and it seems like it would be exhausting and stressful for you. It seems like you're making yourself live in a miserable place for a lot of the time, only for a number on the scale.TavistockToad wrote: »Yeah but that's the issue too though - I still have to be miserable and deprive myself to maintain a lower carb diet. I hate it! And it doesn't always work either, like 2 days ago I only had 11g of carbs for breakfast (from an apple! rest was eggs and sausage) and I was starving after 2 hours... I have to completely change my diet for it to work and it's really not a long term solution at all (plus I have to seriously deprive myself to do that. I like carbs. I still try to make them whole grains/fruit/veggies as much as possible).
I also was never able to handle too much fat (I would get diarrhea and/or stomach pains, two doctors never figured out what the problem was).
So yeah. Plus I can't wrap my head about the fact that I have to restrict more now than when I was losing.
so gain back to 140 and see how you get on and how that feels?
I am 136lbs as of today and losing slowly but consistently (my happy weight is 130-133ish), and can manage on around net 1900 to maintain.
being dizzy all the time doesn't sound right, i agree with see a doctor for that.
sounds like you need a break from the mental torture you have created for yourself.
Yeah but a break is not an option if I end up gaining weight...
I have to schedule my yearly check up though.
I absolutely understand being afraid of gaining all of the weight back. I lost about 80 pounds in my early 20s, down to my lowest of 112 (I'm 5'4"), and I was terrified that it would all come back. I really fixated on maintaining that number, but I didn't look my best, I certainly didn't feel good mentally, and I wasted a ton of time worrying about a number that only I saw.
I'm at 120 now, and I fit into the same jeans as I used to when I was 112. (Yay more muscle!). I've been maintaining my initial loss for 10 years, and depending on my goals I've been anywhere between 120 and 130 for the last 5 years. Within that range, I go up and down between a pant size, and nobody really notices unless I point it out.
Weight is part of health, but it's not the whole story. Our mental health is just as important as our physical health; you've done an amazing job of losing weight and improving your physical health, but maybe it's time to shift your focus onto decreasing your stress. You're not supposed to be hungry all the time, and it's not worth chasing that one particular number on the scale if you have to white-knuckle it the whole way.
I know, and that's why I posted this thread. It's mentally exhausting. That being said, I'm 5'5" and 135 pounds so I'm definitely chunkier than you are (I do have a medium/large frame, but still). The issue too is that I'm not happy with the way I look, as all my fat is on my hips at this point (and belly, but there's so much loose skin that it actually looks worse if I lose there anyway), so it just looks odd in some outfits... plus with my shape I either get a muffin top or my jeans fall off, so it's frustrating as hell.
Come over to the dark side and lift with us
I know you said earlier that you already lift a few days a week...do you enjoy it? What kind of a program are you doing? (I know you've been around MFP for a long time, so I apologize if you've already had this conversation a million times). I'm VERY biased toward lifting, because I love it, and because it has changed my shape quite a bit. (I'm not carrying as much fat on my hips as I used to, everything in general is much tighter, and even the loose skin on my lower stomach looks better because I have muscle underneath). Your post seems to point strongly toward "time for a recomp, and to focus on improving body composition instead of the number on the scale," but only if that sounds like something you would enjoy. The last thing you need is more body-focused stress.
What if you gave yourself a weight range (say, your CW +/- 5-8 pounds), and also tracked your measurements? (Not sure if you already do or not, but if you don't, you should start). Would it bother you if your weight went up a little but your measurements stayed the same? It shouldn't, but if the thought causes you anxiety, it's a flag that you're not in the best mental space.
I just hate lifting lol. Would rather stay like this than bother. When I do it, it's 3 sets of 8-12 reps of the basic moves from stronglift 5x5. But I'm never abe to increase my weights as you're supposed to (I just do more reps, so still aiming for 12 before I increase the weights). I also only have 45lbs adjustable dumbbells (my gym sucks about using the rack and frankly I don't want to bother with it).0 -
I'm 5'5", and while I've dieted down as low as 120 and like my body much better there, it's so much easier to maintain around 130. That was the weight I was for most of high school, and I've been bouncing between 125 and 130 for a couple of years now. I don't have to log, I don't feel hungry, I don't have to actively use restraint much at all. That's where my habits and activity level currently meet. You might do better letting yourself gain a couple of pounds and find if you naturally maintain, but set a limit for how much you're willing to gain. If you decide you're ok gaining 5 lbs but are still hungry and miserable after you do, you'll need to think about other strategies.
Agree with the other posters that a doctor's visit is in order if the dizziness is a regular thing or if any of the symptoms you mentioned are relatively new.0 -
HappyGrape wrote: »I love this quote. Focus on creating a healthy life you can enjoy and let your weight settles where it may. Make sure you live happy, if you aren't you won't be able to maintain it long term.
Dr Yoni Freedhoff
"Best weight” is a non-statistical goal that is easy to set and easy to explain to patients. Patients can diet themselves down to any weight they put their minds to, but to maintain that weight, they need to actually enjoy the lifestyle that got them there.
A patient’s best weight is therefore whatever weight they achieve while living the healthiest lifestyle they can truly enjoy. There comes a point when a person cannot eat less or exercise more and still like their life. The weight they attain while still liking their life is thus their “best” weight, as without the addition of pharmacotherapy or a surgical intervention, no further weight loss will be possible.
This is a very good point...and it's one of the reasons that I think setting some arbitrary number as a goal is not the best idea.
I mean it would be super cool and all if I could maintain somewhere between 165 and 170 and be sub 8% with underwear model abs, etc...but that's not really realistic for me and my overall lifestyle.
I've tried...and it takes an incredible amount of work in terms of both exercising beyond what I really want or have the time to do and being ridiculously anal about my diet...it's no fun, and life is short.
I enjoy healthy living and eating well and regular exercise...but I also enjoy indulgences here and there and going to parties and carousing with the fellas and traveling and enjoying local cuisines, etc. I maintain pretty easily right around 180 and about 15% BF...I can get down to around 175 and 12ish% when I'm training, but that tends to be temporary for an event. I really don't have to think about it much...not that I'm not mindful, but maintaining isn't even close to all consuming...I just live my life for the most part and everything falls into place...
Nobody is going to confuse me with an underwear model anytime soon...but nobody is going to think I'm fat either...most people just think I'm a pretty fit dude who enjoys craft beer and good food and likes to ride his bike.4 -
I think I'm starting to realize that it might just not possible for me to maintain 135 pounds. I'm just too hungry and miserable because the only way to maintain is to really deprive myself...
Has anyone been in the same situation, gained back a few pounds, then managed to maintain that weight successfully? I'm hoping that maybe my hunger will calm down if I gain a couple pounds back? My main worry obviously is that I'll end up gaining the weight back because the hunger won't go away (I've been around 133-135 for 2.5 years now). I'm 5'5" so it's hardly too little.
Man, I knew it would be hard, but I didn't except to be so miserable and worried all the time. I've hardly had any days when I'm not hungry in the last couple months (my cycles have been 3 weeks instead of 4, which totally sucks). I still hit my protein, fat, and fiber goals most days, but it seems that as soon as I eat a treat, even if it's just a 200 calorie one, I end up too hungry and end up going over by 200 at the end of the day.
I know that hunger isn't necessarily bad, but I get dizzy and just feel awful most of the time when I am (except that one week a month when it doesn't bother me, but that hasn't happened in 2 months now).
I don't believe my goal is too low but who knows? I've calculated my TDEE at 2200, but I don't seem to lose if I go under 2000, or to gain if eat 2300 for a week, so it's just confusing to me. I do 1.5 hour of cycling/uphill walking every day in average, some lifting 2x a week or less, with a rest day every 10 days or so, and other than that it's normal household work, cooking, groceries etc. I've been eating closer to 235-2400 calories a day for 2 weeks now (but I'm PMSing too, so there's that).
You'd think I would stress out less about it after this time.. but nope.
Have you tried backing down the 1.5 hours of cardio per day? I'd be starving too. Maybe 30 minutes of cycling or walking and weight training 3x per week?
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I had all your symptoms till I added good fat back in my diet. I don't know why. I just know I was told not to go too low fat. I use olive oil to cook with, peanut butter on toast, 4% cottage cheese, etc. When I was on Weight Watchers several people had your problem but when they added some good fat back in it rally helped2
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This thread has been very insightful to my current situation, thanks to the OP for sharing!2
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I had all your symptoms till I added good fat back in my diet. I don't know why. I just know I was told not to go too low fat. I use olive oil to cook with, peanut butter on toast, 4% cottage cheese, etc. When I was on Weight Watchers several people had your problem but when they added some good fat back in it rally helped
I do that too
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I think I'm starting to realize that it might just not possible for me to maintain 135 pounds. I'm just too hungry and miserable because the only way to maintain is to really deprive myself...
Has anyone been in the same situation, gained back a few pounds, then managed to maintain that weight successfully? I'm hoping that maybe my hunger will calm down if I gain a couple pounds back? My main worry obviously is that I'll end up gaining the weight back because the hunger won't go away (I've been around 133-135 for 2.5 years now). I'm 5'5" so it's hardly too little.
Man, I knew it would be hard, but I didn't except to be so miserable and worried all the time. I've hardly had any days when I'm not hungry in the last couple months (my cycles have been 3 weeks instead of 4, which totally sucks). I still hit my protein, fat, and fiber goals most days, but it seems that as soon as I eat a treat, even if it's just a 200 calorie one, I end up too hungry and end up going over by 200 at the end of the day.
I know that hunger isn't necessarily bad, but I get dizzy and just feel awful most of the time when I am (except that one week a month when it doesn't bother me, but that hasn't happened in 2 months now).
I don't believe my goal is too low but who knows? I've calculated my TDEE at 2200, but I don't seem to lose if I go under 2000, or to gain if eat 2300 for a week, so it's just confusing to me. I do 1.5 hour of cycling/uphill walking every day in average, some lifting 2x a week or less, with a rest day every 10 days or so, and other than that it's normal household work, cooking, groceries etc. I've been eating closer to 235-2400 calories a day for 2 weeks now (but I'm PMSing too, so there's that).
You'd think I would stress out less about it after this time.. but nope.
Have you tried backing down the 1.5 hours of cardio per day? I'd be starving too. Maybe 30 minutes of cycling or walking and weight training 3x per week?
Ya...that is a lot of cardio. What is the goal here? Is it for calorie burn? Or is it something that you get enjoyment out of? If you get enjoyment out of it I see the benefit. But it might be creating a situation where your appetite exceeds your needs.
If it is for general health you are overdoing it. I do 30 minutes of cardio 3-4 times a week. I had a lung function test for work a few months ago and my results were better than average. My blood pressure is always within the normal range. You really don't need to do that much cardio to reap health benefits.
The american heart association has pretty good guidelines:
http://www.heart.org/HEARTORG/HealthyLiving/PhysicalActivity/FitnessBasics/American-Heart-Association-Recommendations-for-Physical-Activity-in-Adults_UCM_307976_Article.jsp#
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When I hit my original goal weight I wasn't happy with how things were yet, so I continued losing and got all the way down to the low end of a healthy bmi (around 117lbs/5ft, 6in). I didn't have a problem maintaining that weight range, but I didn't like how I looked-upper half was way too gaunt looking (I'm pear shaped). So I did a controlled gain over a few months time and have found my ideal weight at 130-133lbs.
OP- there's quite a bit of wiggle room within a healthy bmi, just experiment with how you feel at different weights within it, and eventually you'll find your ideal spot as well
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I totally get it OP. I got to maintenance and was able to up my calories in maintenance by 100 (really?? One cookie?). After a couple of months of being miserable I decided to add some calories. And have gained 20 pounds back because I really enjoyed eating all the stuff I'd avoided for the past year. At 5'2 and 62 years old my maintenance was 1350.
I've decided that I just need to accept eating healthy and filling foods for life, or being an unhealthy weight. I prefer the former. The more vegetables I eat the more full I am. I make homemade veggie chili with turkey breast for breakfast, and a salad with turkey and avocado for lunch. They totally fill me up. It's dinner and evening snacking that are my downfall.0 -
I'm 5'7 135 and if I go anywhere below that my body lets me know. I start getting low blood sugar, headaches, fatigue and just feel like crap! I know for me just taking a week off from exercise and not worrying about watching calories tends to make me feel a lot better. I hate doing it, but I always feel so much better after the week and I find I am not as ravenous and moody. Your body might just need a break!0
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RunRutheeRun wrote: »I think you'll be a lot happier if you put a few pounds back on. I dropped my weight a bit too low and felt absolutely horrible. After I gained 4lbs back I felt like a different person. I'm shorter than you are, so yeah....I did see that 4lbs a bit, but I still looked fine. It wasn't enough to have me busting out of my pants (they still fit me) and the change in my outlook was worth it. What's the point if it's such a struggle to maintain and is making you feel so bad? This isn't just about the scale number or size of our pants. It's bout being healthy. Physically and mentally!
Yeah I agree.
And you know, I just don't get it. Yesterday I had a 600 calorie deficit and I'm not even kidding, more than 60% of my calories were from some bits of brownie and chocolate chip cookie bars (I've been baking for a bake sale for the school, so I had to sample the stuff, and obviously someone had to lick the spoons, you know). I had a ham, cheese and egg low carb tortilla for breakfast (255 calories), some Amy lean mac'n cheese for lunch (290 calories and it's tiny!), and 2 cups of chicken noodle soup for dinner (180 calories). And I wasn't hungry at all. And TOM is still due soon. And I did 15 miles on my stationary bike and was on my feet most of the day.
My body needs to make up its mind. I'm still not hungry today either and it's 9am!
@Francl27 maybe you had a high calorie day the previous day? I find if I eat high one day, I'm not hungry the next so eat at a higher deficit easily/naturally.
That almost never happens to me actually. My appetite/hunger level just seems completely random.
I had my first meal today at 11am. That never happens.
I'm trying to say this as sensitively as I can, and I hope it doesn't come across as critical (because I sincerely do mean it in a caring way)...this isn't a healthy mindset, and it seems like it would be exhausting and stressful for you. It seems like you're making yourself live in a miserable place for a lot of the time, only for a number on the scale.TavistockToad wrote: »Yeah but that's the issue too though - I still have to be miserable and deprive myself to maintain a lower carb diet. I hate it! And it doesn't always work either, like 2 days ago I only had 11g of carbs for breakfast (from an apple! rest was eggs and sausage) and I was starving after 2 hours... I have to completely change my diet for it to work and it's really not a long term solution at all (plus I have to seriously deprive myself to do that. I like carbs. I still try to make them whole grains/fruit/veggies as much as possible).
I also was never able to handle too much fat (I would get diarrhea and/or stomach pains, two doctors never figured out what the problem was).
So yeah. Plus I can't wrap my head about the fact that I have to restrict more now than when I was losing.
so gain back to 140 and see how you get on and how that feels?
I am 136lbs as of today and losing slowly but consistently (my happy weight is 130-133ish), and can manage on around net 1900 to maintain.
being dizzy all the time doesn't sound right, i agree with see a doctor for that.
sounds like you need a break from the mental torture you have created for yourself.
Yeah but a break is not an option if I end up gaining weight...
I have to schedule my yearly check up though.
I absolutely understand being afraid of gaining all of the weight back. I lost about 80 pounds in my early 20s, down to my lowest of 112 (I'm 5'4"), and I was terrified that it would all come back. I really fixated on maintaining that number, but I didn't look my best, I certainly didn't feel good mentally, and I wasted a ton of time worrying about a number that only I saw.
I'm at 120 now, and I fit into the same jeans as I used to when I was 112. (Yay more muscle!). I've been maintaining my initial loss for 10 years, and depending on my goals I've been anywhere between 120 and 130 for the last 5 years. Within that range, I go up and down between a pant size, and nobody really notices unless I point it out.
Weight is part of health, but it's not the whole story. Our mental health is just as important as our physical health; you've done an amazing job of losing weight and improving your physical health, but maybe it's time to shift your focus onto decreasing your stress. You're not supposed to be hungry all the time, and it's not worth chasing that one particular number on the scale if you have to white-knuckle it the whole way.
I know, and that's why I posted this thread. It's mentally exhausting. That being said, I'm 5'5" and 135 pounds so I'm definitely chunkier than you are (I do have a medium/large frame, but still). The issue too is that I'm not happy with the way I look, as all my fat is on my hips at this point (and belly, but there's so much loose skin that it actually looks worse if I lose there anyway), so it just looks odd in some outfits... plus with my shape I either get a muffin top or my jeans fall off, so it's frustrating as hell.
I think you need to give yourself some love. Our body shapes are what they are. I don't think you would be happier any lighter and I actually think an extra 5 lbs might make a positive difference. I decided to hold on to my 5lb beer weight from summer because I look healthier (mind you I'm 53 so...core cracks to fill in). All my clothes fit better too....plus...more beer.0 -
I think I'm starting to realize that it might just not possible for me to maintain 135 pounds. I'm just too hungry and miserable because the only way to maintain is to really deprive myself...
Has anyone been in the same situation, gained back a few pounds, then managed to maintain that weight successfully? I'm hoping that maybe my hunger will calm down if I gain a couple pounds back? My main worry obviously is that I'll end up gaining the weight back because the hunger won't go away (I've been around 133-135 for 2.5 years now). I'm 5'5" so it's hardly too little.
Man, I knew it would be hard, but I didn't except to be so miserable and worried all the time. I've hardly had any days when I'm not hungry in the last couple months (my cycles have been 3 weeks instead of 4, which totally sucks). I still hit my protein, fat, and fiber goals most days, but it seems that as soon as I eat a treat, even if it's just a 200 calorie one, I end up too hungry and end up going over by 200 at the end of the day.
I know that hunger isn't necessarily bad, but I get dizzy and just feel awful most of the time when I am (except that one week a month when it doesn't bother me, but that hasn't happened in 2 months now).
I don't believe my goal is too low but who knows? I've calculated my TDEE at 2200, but I don't seem to lose if I go under 2000, or to gain if eat 2300 for a week, so it's just confusing to me. I do 1.5 hour of cycling/uphill walking every day in average, some lifting 2x a week or less, with a rest day every 10 days or so, and other than that it's normal household work, cooking, groceries etc. I've been eating closer to 235-2400 calories a day for 2 weeks now (but I'm PMSing too, so there's that).
You'd think I would stress out less about it after this time.. but nope.
Have you tried backing down the 1.5 hours of cardio per day? I'd be starving too. Maybe 30 minutes of cycling or walking and weight training 3x per week?
Yep. I think it's a self fulfilling prophecy. OP wants to be able to eat more food so she tries to increase her calorie burn through long steady state cardio which results in increased hunger. You put so much focus on your cycle and symptoms related to the cycle, and seem to want to blame so much of your hunger on that but I really think it's heavily related to your exercise as well.
I also have said this in your other threads on similar topics OP, if you aren't weighing yourself more than once a month or once every three months then you are missing out on gathering valuable data about your overall maintenance weight range and maintenance calorie range.8 -
It's not crazy cardio at all though. I usually burn 350-400 calories in 1.5 hour (from my HRM) of cycling. It's not that much. I do it because I might as well burn some calories instead of vegetating on the couch while watching TV shows.
My hunger's pretty much gone now since day 2 of my period too. As it usually does. But I have to save calories that week so I have to be very careful about what I eat too. Sigh.1 -
It's not crazy cardio at all though. I usually burn 350-400 calories in 1.5 hour (from my HRM) of cycling. It's not that much. I do it because I might as well burn some calories instead of vegetating on the couch while watching TV shows.
My hunger's pretty much gone now since day 2 of my period too. As it usually does. But I have to save calories that week so I have to be very careful about what I eat too. Sigh.
Doesn't matter what advice people give, or observations they make, it always comes back to your cycle. I don't know what else to say. You didn't answer my question about why not weighing more often so you could try to hone in on weight fluctuations due to calorie fluctuations. Basing everything on hunger and your period just doesn't seem like a reliable form of measurement.9 -
I'm trying to say this as sensitively as I can, and I hope it doesn't come across as critical (because I sincerely do mean it in a caring way)...this isn't a healthy mindset, and it seems like it would be exhausting and stressful for you. It seems like you're making yourself live in a miserable place for a lot of the time, only for a number on the scale.TavistockToad wrote: »Yeah but that's the issue too though - I still have to be miserable and deprive myself to maintain a lower carb diet. I hate it! And it doesn't always work either, like 2 days ago I only had 11g of carbs for breakfast (from an apple! rest was eggs and sausage) and I was starving after 2 hours... I have to completely change my diet for it to work and it's really not a long term solution at all (plus I have to seriously deprive myself to do that. I like carbs. I still try to make them whole grains/fruit/veggies as much as possible).
I also was never able to handle too much fat (I would get diarrhea and/or stomach pains, two doctors never figured out what the problem was).
So yeah. Plus I can't wrap my head about the fact that I have to restrict more now than when I was losing.
so gain back to 140 and see how you get on and how that feels?
I am 136lbs as of today and losing slowly but consistently (my happy weight is 130-133ish), and can manage on around net 1900 to maintain.
being dizzy all the time doesn't sound right, i agree with see a doctor for that.
sounds like you need a break from the mental torture you have created for yourself.
Yeah but a break is not an option if I end up gaining weight...
I have to schedule my yearly check up though.
I absolutely understand being afraid of gaining all of the weight back. I lost about 80 pounds in my early 20s, down to my lowest of 112 (I'm 5'4"), and I was terrified that it would all come back. I really fixated on maintaining that number, but I didn't look my best, I certainly didn't feel good mentally, and I wasted a ton of time worrying about a number that only I saw.
I'm at 120 now, and I fit into the same jeans as I used to when I was 112. (Yay more muscle!). I've been maintaining my initial loss for 10 years, and depending on my goals I've been anywhere between 120 and 130 for the last 5 years. Within that range, I go up and down between a pant size, and nobody really notices unless I point it out.
Weight is part of health, but it's not the whole story. Our mental health is just as important as our physical health; you've done an amazing job of losing weight and improving your physical health, but maybe it's time to shift your focus onto decreasing your stress. You're not supposed to be hungry all the time, and it's not worth chasing that one particular number on the scale if you have to white-knuckle it the whole way.
I know, and that's why I posted this thread. It's mentally exhausting. That being said, I'm 5'5" and 135 pounds so I'm definitely chunkier than you are (I do have a medium/large frame, but still). The issue too is that I'm not happy with the way I look, as all my fat is on my hips at this point (and belly, but there's so much loose skin that it actually looks worse if I lose there anyway), so it just looks odd in some outfits... plus with my shape I either get a muffin top or my jeans fall off, so it's frustrating as hell.
Come over to the dark side and lift with us
I know you said earlier that you already lift a few days a week...do you enjoy it? What kind of a program are you doing? (I know you've been around MFP for a long time, so I apologize if you've already had this conversation a million times). I'm VERY biased toward lifting, because I love it, and because it has changed my shape quite a bit. (I'm not carrying as much fat on my hips as I used to, everything in general is much tighter, and even the loose skin on my lower stomach looks better because I have muscle underneath). Your post seems to point strongly toward "time for a recomp, and to focus on improving body composition instead of the number on the scale," but only if that sounds like something you would enjoy. The last thing you need is more body-focused stress.
What if you gave yourself a weight range (say, your CW +/- 5-8 pounds), and also tracked your measurements? (Not sure if you already do or not, but if you don't, you should start). Would it bother you if your weight went up a little but your measurements stayed the same? It shouldn't, but if the thought causes you anxiety, it's a flag that you're not in the best mental space.
I just hate lifting lol. Would rather stay like this than bother. When I do it, it's 3 sets of 8-12 reps of the basic moves from stronglift 5x5. But I'm never abe to increase my weights as you're supposed to (I just do more reps, so still aiming for 12 before I increase the weights). I also only have 45lbs adjustable dumbbells (my gym sucks about using the rack and frankly I don't want to bother with it).
Off topic, but I tried lifting and just didn't really like it and for the time it took, I would rather do a bit more cardio and get to eat extra LOL.2
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