Need to Lose 100 LBS -Robins Thread !

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  • RunawayCurves
    RunawayCurves Posts: 688 Member
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    coolbluecris wrote: »
    ObesityWarrior wrote: »
    I baked two different kinds of cup cakes and several nut loaves today. Still not eating healthy but am feeling a bit better. I have come to conclusion that I will remain morbidly obese for as long as it takes me to get over myself and accept I do not and never will look like Scarlett Johannson. I am so supperficial ,it serves me right to be huge. My eating is part self medicating the bipolar. I honestly believe I would have killed myself decades ago without the food to turn to. Much as I loath binge eating dissorder and being morbodly obese and unhealthy, I must also thank the food binges for being there to get me through where all medications and other support systems failed. So 50% is down to food binges being most effective self medication to date, the other 50% is almost a self harm punishing myself for not being good enough. Maybe if I could just get over myself and accept I am not societies beauty ideal, have a kinder vision and value myself for my inner beauty as I try to do others, maybe then I would be in less emotional pain during bipolar crashes and need less food to medicate myself with. So I am just not going to focus on the fat, I need to focus on seeing my inner beauty.

    You sound like an interesting person, you have intellectualised everything like I have for many years too and I loved reading your post.

    I finally decided that above all else, I just really like food, and if there's something really yummy in the house I usually eat it. That's normal! So I just don't buy overly tempting stuff anymore. And I try to not cook for enough to be left over. I find it's helped immensely.

    You sound lovely, and I wish you an exciting and happy 2017 :-)

    Thank you, nice of you to say. I hope you have a great year too :)
    You are quite right, I love eating yummy things. I am a sensually orientated person. Lovely artwork on walls, colourful infusions of feature walls and throws, lots of mood lighting, all yumminess for the eyes. Love listening to music , usually something on in background for my ears to enjoy, often burn scented oils, candles, inscense sticks, bath bombs, perfumes for my nose, lots of cushions and soft fabric clothing for my touch, of course I love eating stuff. All of my sences are heavilly indulged. It is a blessing really that only the eating causes weight gain, just imagine if indulging the other senses had similar side effects :o .

    Today my delivery of Huel arrived, its a vegan meal replacement product. I tried one drink, it tastes quite artificially sweet, maybe go for the unseatend one next time but it is perfectly drinkable. I did go on to consume an unspecified number of cup cakes and shared some around at a group I went to, my home is now once again devoid of cupcakes. I also made a very haphazzard vegetable soup out of everything in my fridge on verge of going off, not very tasty but I feel virtuouse for having consumed some real life vegetation today. I thought the Huel might be worth having a go at doing a detox with. Sometimes I think I need a break from earting, not a long term thing, just a week or two of huel and whole foods to reset system. Also as it suposedly has everything in it that the body needs I thought it might be good to have around for when I cant manage to eat anything sensible, at least then I could add in a huel or two a day to get some nutrients along with whatever rubbish I eat when mood is bad.

    I am pleased that although my food intake has a lot of room for improvement, one thing that is looking up is my mood. Could be sugar high but I really do not care, just glad to be feeling in a better mood after being stuck in a low for months. Cooking my own naughty treats/junk is an improvement on shop bought junk, at least I know what is in stuff when I make my own and it has a better energy and theraputic value of making it, Baby steps.
  • birgitkwood
    birgitkwood Posts: 486 Member
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    @ObesityWarrior - Laura, you are so amazingly self-reflective. I love that! And I LOVE your description of all the ways in which you indulge all your senses. Your home sounds absolutely lovely - a place I, too, could feel perfectly at home in. Wishing you the best of luck with Huel.
  • birgitkwood
    birgitkwood Posts: 486 Member
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    @FeraFilia - I love my Fitbit and would not have been as successful in my weight loss efforts without it. It's an incredible motivator for me. How your enjoy yours as much. Good luck!
  • birgitkwood
    birgitkwood Posts: 486 Member
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    @pneschich - is it possible maybe for you to use a bike? Maybe a stationary bike at a gym, if necessary? (I belong to Planet Fitness at $10/mos, so pretty affordable.) Just thinking maybe there's a way for you to get some exercise while your foot is healing. So frustrating. Sending positive healing vibes to you, as well as your MIL and your wife & kids.
  • KillionSL
    KillionSL Posts: 24 Member
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    Greetings, one and all! 2017 is the year of being good to me! I'm off to a good start and today I integrated my fitbit with my new smartscale and MFP. I have 114 pounds to lose to get to my goal weight, so this is going to be a great journey! Hope to meet some new friends along the way too!

    My husband and I and our 10 year old daughter travel the US and Canada full-time in an RV so we get to see the world this year while we're working on dropping the pounds. :)
  • coolbluecris
    coolbluecris Posts: 228 Member
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    ObesityWarrior glad you're feeling good about yourself and life x
  • coolbluecris
    coolbluecris Posts: 228 Member
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    KillionSL wrote: »
    Greetings, one and all! 2017 is the year of being good to me! I'm off to a good start and today I integrated my fitbit with my new smartscale and MFP. I have 114 pounds to lose to get to my goal weight, so this is going to be a great journey! Hope to meet some new friends along the way too!

    My husband and I and our 10 year old daughter travel the US and Canada full-time in an RV so we get to see the world this year while we're working on dropping the pounds. :)

    Hello KillionSL

    My husband and I have considered the RV way of life. Can you tell me about your experience and how you made it all work with jobs, expenses etc? Thank so much :-)
  • RachaelPooh
    RachaelPooh Posts: 5,887 Member
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    Wednesday I had my first gain of my DASH Plan. Today (Friday) I had my first stay the same. :confused: I know I shouldn't expect a loss everyday but it was so exciting to see that first week. Everyday the scale would be down half to three pounds. Losing weight is hard.
  • pneschich
    pneschich Posts: 325 Member
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    Friday freak out! Had a horrible stress eating frenzy yesterday. Saw it coming, watched it roll in, felt like merde' when it was done. As if MIL and her cancer, impending surgery and its associated craziness, foot in a boot and life wasn't enough I got an email from my big brothers group home asking me if I noticed any signs of Alzheimer's, quite common in Down's syndrome after 50, so I wracked my brain and have those new worries. Holy smokes! Glad my wife and dog still love me or I could be a country song. Back on the reservation today. I'm afraid to calculate the calories I ate yesterday! I wish I could have made myself do something. I knew I was doing it. It soothed something but didn't make anything better or clearer. Wanted to walk but it hurts and the boot is awkward. I am noticing the lack of exercise in many ways, libido at the top of the list. Mood a very very distant second (others might rank them differently but I'm not asking the wife's opinion on it). Gotta get up and move.
  • Misnomer971
    Misnomer971 Posts: 104 Member
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    @FeraFilia - Congrats on the new FitBit (and on having family/friends who actually listen)! I am all about gadgets, and even get vicariously excited about other people's new toys. :)

    @ObesityWarrior - Great attitude!

    @KillionSL and @TheMerryBoffin - I'm pretty new here, myself, but welcome!

    @MermaidPrincessRach - Even when you know it's likely, a plateau or gain can still be frustrating. And yeah, this weight loss stuff definitely isn't for wusses. You've totally still got this, though!

    @pneschich - Oh man, I'm sorry things have been so tough lately. I can't imagine anyone begrudging you a stress-eating frenzy...frankly, I'm impressed that it was only one day! :) You'll figure out a way to move more, even with the boot.

    As for me, yesterday and Wednesday were high-calorie days (though nothing like Thanksgiving or New Year's Day): my dad had cataract surgery early yesterday morning so I drove up there on Wednesday and spent the night, and we went to dinner that evening and then had a late breakfast after the surgery. I logged everything, though. I've been surprised to discover how much logging helps, even (especially?) on the "bad" days.

    For Friday Fitness, I'm pleased to be able to say that I walked 1 mile (@ 3mph) three times this week. I think that's a record for me. :smiley: And I recently had a "duh" moment where I realized that I don't have to choose between the treadmill and my dumbbells each day: I can walk in the mornings and use the weights in the evenings. It's time for me to step up the treadmill stuff, though...I need to either start walking faster, or going farther than 1 mile. Or maybe both. I hope to figure it out this weekend.
  • campfirequeen1
    campfirequeen1 Posts: 317 Member
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    I'm just about ready to get back in the Nashville house and it can't happen soon enough. I'm sick of eating, and who in the world would have ever guessed I would say a thing like that? LOL I'm so ready to go back to my healthy eating and normal life. I'm very grateful that I've had family and friends that welcomed me to stay with them over the past five weeks and share their food, which of course had lots of Christmas goodies. And yes, it was planned as a ten day thing but true to all the HGTV type remodels, when you start monkeying with a house built in the early 1950s, you WILL run into the unexpected! So the cost soared up and the time to accomplish it did as well.

    The major mishap (the reason for undertaking the remodel in the first place was a sagging living room ceiling) was that the dining room ceiling fell, and they propped up the living room ceiling to keep it from following suit but then the kitchen ceiling fell). The walls and ceilings are plaster, it made a monumental mess! So the remodel is complete now, including unexpectedly replacing the outside bathroom wall due to a leak in the window (it's a 1950s style remember) that rotted away the studs and wallboard.

    The carpenters finished yesterday, the cleaning crew is there today and the painters will be in Sat and Sun. Monday I will be home and the 2017 eating plan and healthy lifestyle will begin. I'm so excited! I haven't been on the scale to see the damage done yet, but my clothes say there is damage! UGH Well, it's just part of the journey and I'm not going to sweat what I shoulda, coulda, woulda done and get on with a much improved healthy life and size than I was this time last year and just be thankful!
  • harribeau2012
    harribeau2012 Posts: 644 Member
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    campfirequeen1 enjoy your newish home...Good luck with the new regime too
  • RachaelPooh
    RachaelPooh Posts: 5,887 Member
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    @pneschich I gave you an Awesome. I am confident you will find a way thru! And it'll be Great because you're great! ::cheering and chanting your name:: :smiley:
  • birgitkwood
    birgitkwood Posts: 486 Member
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    @pneschich - what @MermaidPrincessRach said!
  • FeraFilia
    FeraFilia Posts: 4,664 Member
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    Got my new Fitbit in! So that's the good news.

    The bad news is the weather and illness has prevented me from getting out to get my running shoes.

    More good news: I stepped on the scale this morning and saw my pre-holiday festivities low weight. Even after some snacky issues earlier this week, because leftover treats were sitting around and I have zero ability to resist them. I'll get there, eventually.

    I hope the first week of 2017 is treating you all well!
  • pneschich
    pneschich Posts: 325 Member
    edited January 2017
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    @MermaidPrincessRach, @Misnomer971 and @birgitkwood. Thank you! I'm a mess right now. 2 weeks from a life altering change. An inability to do what I need to do. So many things at this time that are so hard for me. So many doubts. So many responsibilities, husband, father, boss, brother. My wife took a photo of me and my siblings , i'm the fat one. It hurts, it's out in the world. Accursed social media. It feels pointless I hurt myself walking. I let stress drive me to the fridge. I am a mess.
  • RachaelPooh
    RachaelPooh Posts: 5,887 Member
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    Sometimes we have trouble seeing the big picture when we are so close to it. You have lost an incredible amount of weight thus far. You are a great father and husband. You are smart and loving and hard working. Very respectable! I doubt your family and friends see you as "the fat one". I bet they see the man who loves them and they have made great memories with and want to share their life with as long as they can because YOU are a great guy! It's not a sin to eat "bad foods". It's okay to let yourself heal and process everything that's going on in your life. And I know after you get your surgery, you will take it one day at a time and the journey will be amazing! Just take a deep breath and know we are all rooting for you!
  • birgitkwood
    birgitkwood Posts: 486 Member
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    @pneschich - at Thanksgiving 2015 a group family picture was taken. There are 20+ ppl in the photo, but my 27 acre body took up half the frame. Wish I could post it here to show you. I was beyond horrified! That was in November, and then it took me another 4 1/2 mos to figure out what to do about it and find the motivation to act. God only knows how much more weight I gained during that time. Now I use that photo (cropped out all the other family mbrs) as my "before" photo, although I probably wasn't even at my heaviest yet. Point is, suddenly the stars aligned in my brain and something clicked. I'll bet it will for you too, when you're ready. You do have a lot on your plate right now - far more than most mere mortals. Be kind to yourself! We all hold you in the light and pray that peace finds you - soon. Sending hugs xx

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