"I want to get in shape, unless it requires effort..."

Options
135

Replies

  • rhtexasgal
    rhtexasgal Posts: 572 Member
    Options
    I simply ask people "what's stopping you?" when they say they cannot do what I do. Like I am doing something special? I log my food, I exercise, I eat donuts ... apparently, it's the donuts that does it! They don't understand how I can eat donuts and yet maintain my weight loss. Their eyes glaze over when I mention logging food and heaven forbid - exercise!
  • thelovelyLIZ
    thelovelyLIZ Posts: 1,227 Member
    Options
    I've learned that there are a lot of people out there who would rather make excuses than actually follow through with what they "want." I see it about losing weight, career advancement, learning a new skill etc etc. I wish people would say "it's not a priority to me right now" instead of "I don't have time." I gained back my weight but I was very aware that my diet and workout routine weren't a priority to me at the time- I was hyper focused on my career and getting my financial life in order. Now it's a priority again so I make time for it.

    It just makes me so so so sad. There are so many people out there who you can tell really want something but for whatever reason don't feel empowered to go for it. Most of the time it's well within their grasp but again, it's easier to make excuses and blame external factors than actually go for it.
  • TrishSeren
    TrishSeren Posts: 587 Member
    Options
    My flatmate, my flatmate does this constantly. My bf works training Olympians and future Olympians and even he couldn't get through to my flatmate.
  • OhMsDiva
    OhMsDiva Posts: 1,074 Member
    Options
    all of these reasons is why I stopped answering the question, how did you do it a few months back. I am pretty sure most adults with a few working brain cells can figure out how to lose weight. When someone asks now I just look at them and smile. If they really want to know the answer they will ask sincerely and actually listen. Otherwise, I think it is just something that people say after they see that you have lost weight. Most do not really want to hear that I exercise and monitor what I eat.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,566 Member
    edited January 2017
    Options
    Bry_Lander wrote: »
    The other day I had the same early January conversation in our workplace gym locker room with the same person, regarding the same topic, for probably the third time in the last 5 years.

    Him: “Hey, what do you do to stay in shape?”

    Me: “It is mostly through my diet, I try to eat a set amount of calories and a minimal amount of protein each day”.

    Him: Blank stare. “I don’t see how I can do that every day, I don’t have the time.” (As if I am just some free-spirit who is unburdened by a full time job, kids, etc.).

    Me: “It doesn’t really take that long once you get used to it, you can probably do it in 15 minutes a day”

    Silence.

    Apparently it is too much of a bother to track calories, so this guy just goes on year after year working out consistently every week and never sees any changes. I don’t understand how he can have the discipline to regularly go to the gym and exercise but not to attempt to get his diet under control. The gym is full of them. I have a feeling we will have the same brief, awkward conversation in January 2018 or 2019, lol…
    I'd love to have co ed locker rooms.

    People look for the easiest and minimal effort in most things. Unless it's something they are really interested in achieving, they look for advice that will give them the easy way.


    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png
  • Qskim
    Qskim Posts: 1,145 Member
    Options
    Bry_Lander wrote: »
    kgeyser wrote: »
    I think those actually tend to be the real stumbling blocks for people which derail them. The "eat less, move more" is great in theory, what many people are looking for is someone to help them look at their individual situation and figure out how to implement it. Unfortunately, I think that often gets read as "they don't want it badly enough." It takes some people longer to process everything and be able to see it in a way that is possible in their lives. I figure if people are asking questions, it's because they are trying to learn more and make a change, and that's a good thing.

    I felt like he lost interest when my solution required him to do something different. He wasn’t like “how do you track calories?”, “how big of a deficit do I need to have each day/week?”, “how long do you think it would take me to lose X pounds?”, there was no real follow up. He disengaged after I told him my “secret”, it was almost like he felt he had committed to making an effort to reach out to me, heard something that he didn’t feel was worth attempting, and then moved on. He is an extremely bright guy (I have had work dealings with him over the years) and could easily crunch the numbers if he decided that was what he wanted to do.

    I wonder though what his idea of counting calories is? Years ago 1200cals was the number touted whenever you heard counting calories (this was a thing with me which I did and lost weight). I didn't understand tdee - now, I'm almost embarrassed to say that because that part of the equation was always there, I just didn't "get" it plus back then I had to flick through a little book to get calorie counts of foods - tedious (although I find these days the technological simplicity of an app tedious too - spoilt brat I am when is the diary going to mind read?). I find, even this many years later people still assume calorie counting is some form of VLCD. Understanding I had a range to fall within whereby I could lose weight on cake eating or not cake eating days was a game changer among other things...
  • Strawblackcat
    Strawblackcat Posts: 944 Member
    Options
    JenHuedy wrote: »
    Rachel0778 wrote: »
    JenHuedy wrote: »
    She invited me over for dinner tonight. She said she made boneless/skinless chicken breast, brown rice and steamed broccoli "just for you!" Ummm.... OK. But I hope to hell you don't think I've eaten like that every day for the last 2 1/2 years. I prefer chicken thighs with extra crispy skin, white rice pilaf and broccoli with a little butter or cheese sauce.

    *Gag* Please tell me she added spices/seasonings at least? I'm all for healthy food, but I hate it when people equate healthy food with bland food.

    I won't be eating there until later tonight. But things aren't promising. When I went there for a cookout this summer the grilled chicken was cremated and the asparagus cooked to mush. I loathe overcooked foods. Boneless skinless chicken takes a bit of skill to cook properly and there is a general tendency in the midwest to cook things into oblivion, then cook 5 more minutes "just in case."

    This reminds me so much of my mother. She brought me up on boneless, skinless, chicken tenders charred black on both sides by our gas grill "to kill the worms". I cooked her and my father a perfect medium-rare leg of lamb for dinner last night and she promptly put her portion into the microwave and turned it into shoe leather. Old habits die hard, I guess.
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    Options
    It seems to me (based on observation and conversations with the many serial dieters I know) that many people actually seem to WANT it to be more complicated than it really is. Gives them a good excuse to not do it if it's really taxing and they can reason their way out of having to change. It's also a way to save face if/when they fail to stick with it. When you set yourself up to do something really difficult or even near impossible, it's easier to excuse failure, but if you fail at something simple, it's embarrassing. Many people have asked me what my "secret" is, and they look at me with blank stares when I tell them the straightforward concepts of eating less, moving more. They are convinced that I'm special or lucky. I hear that a lot - I'm lucky. :s

    Many people are comfortable with the status quo, even if the status quo is kinda crappy. Even if they aren't happy with it, it's what they know, and it's somehow safer than change. I don't think people actually succeed at this kind of thing until they are fully ready. A dedicated mindset is the most important part. You either see it as a priority and make time and effort for it, or you don't. Most of the "dieting" I see people doing is so gimmicky and really looks like fooling around to me. It's amazing how much thought, research, energy and effort people will devote to various other aspects of their lives, but they just can't/don't/won't carry it over to health/fitness. Oh well. :|
  • Cylphin60
    Cylphin60 Posts: 863 Member
    Options
    Bry_Lander wrote: »
    He also asked me if I eat things that are "fattening". I told him I do all of the time, I either allow for them by eating less of other things, exercising, or just accepting that I am going to exceed my caloric limitations that day and move on with life. Then he asked about eating late in the evening. I told him it didn't matter, as long as he ate within his limits it really doesn't matter when he eats.

    He looked really unenthused about all of this, I think he just wanted me to pull a bottle of magic pills out of my gym bag and say "I take one of these each day and they magically make me fit!"

    I swear we work together and you're talking about one of my co-worker/good friends.

    I've got nothing to add to the conversation because what you're saying is copy and pasted right out of my buddies playbook and our conversations.
  • Cylphin60
    Cylphin60 Posts: 863 Member
    Options
    KatzeDerNacht22 wrote: »
    Awww I'm sad people find brown rice and steamed broccoli dull... I do enjoy that stuff.

    They're not doing it right! ;) I love em myself :)
  • CooCooPuff
    CooCooPuff Posts: 4,374 Member
    Options
    One of the things that always gets me is that after having kept a lot of weight off for a few years, heavier members of the family kind of ignores the fact that I had the highest bmi for years.

    They've never tried cutting down portions because "they love food" too much, never tried eating more veggies in different ways because "they're gross", and think you have to "eat clean" all the time to have the best body you can. I was in that position until I started counting. They seem to think it all came naturally.

    This thanksgiving season, one of them honestly asked me what I thought "those super healthy Instagram fitness people" are for Thanksgiving. I said they would basically eat the same thing, got a dirty look and a no way.
  • canteronkat
    canteronkat Posts: 126 Member
    Options
    I don't count calories I'm not fat - it called actually sweating at the gym, increasing your heart rate and muscle failure. People have no idea what it really means to work out.
  • Rachel0778
    Rachel0778 Posts: 1,701 Member
    Options
    KatzeDerNacht22 wrote: »
    Awww I'm sad people find brown rice and steamed broccoli dull... I do enjoy that stuff.

    Don't get me wrong, I enjoy all of those things. I just also enjoy them well seasoned and prepared (and not dull and dry) :)

Categories