So lost and alone

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  • JCcatalyst
    JCcatalyst Posts: 11 Member
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    Wow impressed with the caring great responses here! It's your life dear but what heard you say that was huge is you lost 50lbs!!! Wow that takes determination drive willpower motivation and a whole lotta work!! To me that's a lady worth her weight in gold! Pun intended! You are worth so much more believe in you!!!
  • happydaze71
    happydaze71 Posts: 339 Member
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    Ask him to show you his chats on tinder - if it's all innocent and above board, he won't have a problem with it.
    This man does not respect you. Please please please respect yourself enough to walk away.
    Pack your bags and go to your parents house and stay there.
    You are worthy of so much more. Don't for a minute think that you aren't.
  • MelodyMomof2
    MelodyMomof2 Posts: 45 Member
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    It really breaks my heart to read this. You don't deserve to be treated that way. Don't think because you aren't an ideal weight that you deserve to be treated that way. You need to start focusing on you. You won't be alone forever! You are a special person, and if your husband can't see that he doesn't deserve you.
  • MissMaggieMuffin
    MissMaggieMuffin Posts: 444 Member
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    KristenCS9 wrote: »
    Obviously, I don't know your whole situation, but just from what you've said in this thread, it sounds like your husband has been emotionally abusive to you. I speak from experience. It's a painful thing to deal with. I agree with everyone above that you should find a good therapist and do it ASAP. Take care of yourself. You deserve it no matter what he tells you. And congrats on losing 50 pounds. That is an impressive accomplishment! Feel free to PM me if you want to talk.

    ^This^.
    So many red flags in the OP's post!
    A person that is committed to a marriage does not have a tinder account.
    A person that is committed to a marriage does not belittle their partner's self-care.
    A partner that is committed to a marriage supports their partner, makes every effort to get along with their in-laws (doesn't have to love them!).
    And so on.

    Take care of yourself - you deserve love, care, compassion, and support!
  • debbiedavis1965
    debbiedavis1965 Posts: 23 Member
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    Please do not let his negative words influence you in your weight loss. He sounds as if he has a great deal of issues that even you losing weight can't and won't solve. If you want to go old school please message me I'll give you my number and talk with you any time you want. You are so important. Last time I checked being skinny was not in the marriage vows.
  • Veggie_mama
    Veggie_mama Posts: 5 Member
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    Choose yourself. Love yourself. Everyone here has your back! You are a strong woman although you may not believe that at the moment. Love and peace to you, friend. ☮️
  • Lynzdee18
    Lynzdee18 Posts: 500 Member
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    He's not worth it. Period.
  • faithsimmons526
    faithsimmons526 Posts: 162 Member
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    MissMaggieMuffin wrote: »
    KristenCS9 wrote: »
    Obviously, I don't know your whole situation, but just from what you've said in this thread, it sounds like your husband has been emotionally abusive to you. I speak from experience. It's a painful thing to deal with. I agree with everyone above that you should find a good therapist and do it ASAP. Take care of yourself. You deserve it no matter what he tells you. And congrats on losing 50 pounds. That is an impressive accomplishment! Feel free to PM me if you want to talk.

    ^This^.
    So many red flags in the OP's post!
    A person that is committed to a marriage does not have a tinder account.
    A person that is committed to a marriage does not belittle their partner's self-care.
    A partner that is committed to a marriage supports their partner, makes every effort to get along with their in-laws (doesn't have to love them!).
    And so on.

    Take care of yourself - you deserve love, care, compassion, and support!

    This^^ ... and all the other wonderful comments as well. There's nothing more I can add other than to say that you could lose a couple hundred pounds of ugly fat by leaving his a**. He doesn't deserve you. <3
  • fiddletime
    fiddletime Posts: 1,862 Member
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    I was told a long time ago that in a marriage two people are stronger together than apart. While my husband and I could live without each other, each of us brings something to the table that allows the other person to grow and be better. To be stronger.

    You've done a fantastic job losing 50# and working on your health. It seems from your post that you've managed to do this despite your husband, rather than because of him and his help.

    A supportive spouse would help you achieve your goals, not mock you. He would support your relationship with your parents, not dislike it. And on and on. Are you a better person with your husband, or without?
  • Onyx_Eve
    Onyx_Eve Posts: 37 Member
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    You should go to a counselor by yourself to build up your self esteem. You deserve better. When people admit to something they only tell you half the truth. Good luck! Some people lose lots of weight getting out of a bad relationship and surrounding themselves with people who support them. I know it's complicated if you have kids, if you don't have kids, you should leave. No one should humiliate you like that. Marriage is through thick and thin.

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