Bless your heart!

24

Replies

  • Owlie45
    Owlie45 Posts: 806 Member
    You're so full of *kitten* your eyes are brown.
  • Cerealsensei
    Cerealsensei Posts: 1,625 Member
    KyleGrace8 wrote: »
    6260s1sq81td.jpg

    Lmao this gets me every time
  • cee134
    cee134 Posts: 33,711 Member
    w0sfyxseg7a7.jpg
  • LittleHearseDriver
    LittleHearseDriver Posts: 2,677 Member
    newmeadow wrote: »
    You can't ride two horses with one asss. (Thank you Dr. Phil)

    This is my new life motto! I want it tattooed on my butt.
  • MissDeeDee78
    MissDeeDee78 Posts: 415 Member
    Knock yer self out!
  • DanZiehm
    DanZiehm Posts: 152 Member
    Don't tell me about the pain... Just show me the baby!
  • MissDeeDee78
    MissDeeDee78 Posts: 415 Member
    Who s*it in your Shreddies?
  • klkarlen
    klkarlen Posts: 4,366 Member
    Don't argue with an idiot, anyone watching won't be able to tell you apart.

    I've got a deadline creeping up like cheap shorts.

    Don't try to teach a pig to sing. It's a waste of your time and annoys the pig.
  • Crimson_Fire
    Crimson_Fire Posts: 2,504 Member
    "It's hotter than 2 rats f'n in a wool sock"
  • Jimb376mfp
    Jimb376mfp Posts: 6,236 Member
    edited March 2017
    Credit Vida, my Mother (1917-1974), with these two said to me when I was a kid:

    I'm gonna rake you over the coals!

    I'm gonna snatch you bald headed!
  • jamcdonel
    jamcdonel Posts: 533 Member
    LittleHearseDriver wrote: »
    newmeadow wrote: »
    You can't ride two horses with one asss. (Thank you Dr. Phil)

    This is my new life motto! I want it tattooed on my butt.

    Dammit! I just let my Tattoo Artist's License lapse!
  • ejbronte
    ejbronte Posts: 867 Member
    Well, well, well. Three holes in the ground.

    Here's one, a favorite of my Spanish father: "By the mouth dies the fish."
  • NewlifeinNW
    NewlifeinNW Posts: 3,866 Member
    That's so good it'll make you slap your Grandma
  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
    edited March 2017
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    Steph38878 wrote: »
    It's colder than a well diggers *kitten* in Idaho.

    and hotter than a w horehouse on dollar day

    And hotter than a jalapeno's coochie.
  • kcotey54
    kcotey54 Posts: 24 Member
    "Never panic on dry land"
  • LittleHearseDriver
    LittleHearseDriver Posts: 2,677 Member
    Dadgummit.

    You're finer than frog hair.
  • Rhody_Hoosier
    Rhody_Hoosier Posts: 688 Member
    I'd buy that for a dollar.

    You're mom.
  • synchkat
    synchkat Posts: 37,368 Member
    I've s friend with his own language some gems are

    Mother in the garden
    He or she has a face full of features
    Anyone need the wims?
    She's a fuller figured gal
    Coffee and muff?
  • LittleHearseDriver
    LittleHearseDriver Posts: 2,677 Member
    Son of a hamster.
  • ElizabethHanrahan
    ElizabethHanrahan Posts: 102 Member
    Dumber than a box of rocks.
  • FeraFilia
    FeraFilia Posts: 4,664 Member
    Something my aunt used to say when catching any of us rolling our eyes or something... "Don't you look at me in that tone of voice."

    I have no idea where she got it. It makes no sense. I will probably say it to my own kid at some point.
  • SueSueDio
    SueSueDio Posts: 4,796 Member
    FeraFilia wrote: »
    Something my aunt used to say when catching any of us rolling our eyes or something... "Don't you look at me in that tone of voice."

    I have no idea where she got it. It makes no sense. I will probably say it to my own kid at some point.

    There's a bit more to that one - I used to get it from my older brother...

    "Don't look at me in that tone of voice, it smells a funny colour!" ;)

    One of our family sayings that probably isn't well known relates to trying something again... "And now, with the book!" It comes from this sketch from an 80s UK comedy show, and always stuck with us. :)

    Also, with regard to "Bob's your uncle" - I don't recall exactly what the advert was for, but a few years back there was an ad that wanted to use this phrase in a more upper class kind of way. They said, "And Robert is very much your mother's brother." That's another one that stuck in my mind!
  • 12th___Man
    12th___Man Posts: 2 Member
    On the gravy train with biscuit wheels.
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    My Dad's sayings:

    The *kitten* you get son, isn't always worth the *kitten* you get.
    Men plan and God laughs.
    You never know the real story behind what things appear to be.
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    Son, let me tell ya: *kitten* is just like oxygen; it ain't no big deal til you ain't gettin' none.


    ~ gunny shoemaker, USMC
  • DeficitDuchess
    DeficitDuchess Posts: 3,099 Member
    Hoover Dam it! (I try, not to; cuss)!
  • ejbronte
    ejbronte Posts: 867 Member
    Another family twist, adopted by all of us: "We'll burn that bridge when we come to it."

    A Russian designer on Project Runway (I confess, I watch it), commented that a fellow designer was a "one way monkey".
  • Just_J_Now
    Just_J_Now Posts: 9,551 Member
    Not the sharpest knife in the drawer
  • Rhody_Hoosier
    Rhody_Hoosier Posts: 688 Member
    edited March 2017
    Keep it simple stupid.

    FUBAR.

    F#@k a duck.

    I parked in the back 40.

    Everything is going to hell in a hand basket.
  • LittleHearseDriver
    LittleHearseDriver Posts: 2,677 Member
    Shut the front door.
This discussion has been closed.

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