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Sabotaging sister in law :(
SalmonSister
Posts: 37 Member
As soon as my SIL finds out I'm trying to eat healthy and on a diet, the keyword she zooms into is the word 'diet'. She always tries to encourage bad dieting by having many multiple cheat days and how she makes it her priority to also "help" her friends when she finds out they are on a diet by cooking/inviting to fast foods/alcohol parties. I'm pretty sure she wants people to fail. Which is sad. I just don't know what to do that isn't rude, but I have told her many times, that I'm sticking to my own life changing experience. Any advice? Rant over. Sorry!
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Replies
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Yep. They are out there. Pay them no mind.7
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Tell her to *kitten* off7
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Show her by your actions (sticking to your goal ) that you're serious .. it'll hit the mark for both of you!11
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That is sad. Unfortunately, many users on MFP have encountered those who both purposefully and unintentionally suddenly make sure that whenever someone tries to become healthier, temptations are more present. Consistency is key. Stay strong. Repeat your resolve as necessary AND prove that you mean it by sticking to a reasonable calorie deficit. After all, no matter the environment, it is ultimately you who decides what goes into your body.
If your SIL is also a hindrance in other areas of life, try to distance yourself from her as much as possible.
Good luck!13 -
Try jokingly accusing her of sabotage ever time she tries to push food you don't want, you can probably train her to stop if you're consistent.
:-)14 -
Thanks everyone! It's hard because she admits she like to sabotage healthy eating, but it is up to me to keep my guns strong and stick with my diet!5
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I've learned in this process that I must "drown out the noise" to succeed. I mean all the noise. In laws, over commitment, stress, really anything.
One of my favorite people in the world told me something about my journey that hurt me and I stewed for about 24 hours. Then the light came on and I thought to myself, as much as I'd like support I'm not going to get it. For this weight loss journey, it is a party of one. My rules, my decisions, my life...I love them all dearly but for me to do this I need to keep my head clear.
Usually if someone is giving you a hard time it is simply a reflection of their struggle, shake it off...move on...and keep doing what you're doing. You won't change them.13 -
If it were me, and she actually flat out admits that she likes to sabotage healthy eating, I'd be asking her what the *kitten* her issue is. That's just flatout asshat behaviour.22
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My aunt is pretty infamous on these forums as a sabotager....a true one. She melts butter into my coffees when i pee....
Anyway unless shes packing lard into your food when your not looking she cant harm your efforts. just ignore it :P5 -
JaydedMiss wrote: »My aunt is pretty infamous on these forums as a sabotager....a true one. She melts butter into my coffees when i pee....
Anyway unless shes packing lard into your food when your not looking she cant harm your efforts. just ignore it :P
Unless you SIL is stooping to this level the phrase "No, thank you" should work just fine. Practice saying it in front of the mirror if you have to.4 -
Why are you even discussing your diet with her? You know how she is - what you eat shouldn't even be a topic of discussion with her.13
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I'd politely decline all but one gathering a week or couple of weeks, bank some calories for it and eat whatever is served within my calorie allotment.
You wiill confound her by eating "sabotaged food" and still lose:).
At least that's what I do with similar situations.
10 -
Stop talking about your food. She will move on to something /someone else maybe.
In the meantime, stopping hanging around her. She might not be a good person to have in your life right now.5 -
Ignore her
Don't eat the food
Your responsible for you
She needs help4 -
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You don't have to be rude or aggressive but you do need to be assertive. By being consistently assertive and not giving in she will likely give up.
Don't be timid, stand up for yourself.
At the end of the day though, if rude gets the message across, maybe you need to be rude3 -
shandalynnr wrote: »Thanks everyone! It's hard because she admits she like to sabotage healthy eating, but it is up to me to keep my guns strong and stick with my diet!
She admits it? Seriously? What on earth is going thorough her head? Does she think it's funny to encourage habits that can cut lives short by 10 or 20 years?5 -
shandalynnr wrote: »Thanks everyone! It's hard because she admits she like to sabotage healthy eating, but it is up to me to keep my guns strong and stick with my diet!
If she knows she's being an asshat, just dump the food in her lap and walk away. Certain people don't understand subtleties and/or "no thanks" and need to be, theoretically, hit over the head with a baseball bat before they knock it off.6 -
You can always go and pick suitable resturant, and if she's too much of an annoyance, don't ever see her again. Simple.1
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Ready2Rock206 wrote: »Why are you even discussing your diet with her? You know how she is - what you eat shouldn't even be a topic of discussion with her.
Agree with this - if she is carrying on this way as soon as she finds out you're trying to eat healthier, just don't tell her - simples!1
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