Too fat to EVER get pregnant?

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Replies

  • RunWildYoungBeauty
    RunWildYoungBeauty Posts: 43 Member
    JeromeBarry1 wrote: »
    Of course it is possible for obese women to become pregnant and deliver a healthy full-term baby. It is then highly probable the child will grow up first chubby, then fat, then obese, and have a lifetime struggle with obesity.
    I know you want to have a child. Please get into 'momma bear' mode and fight for the wellbeing of your future child by doing the things necessary to attain a healthy weight before initiating your pregnancy.

    I am not credentialed to give medical advice, nor did I sleep at a Holiday Inn Express or any other place last night. But I want to point out that losing weight with bariatric surgery is accomplished by forcing yourself to maintain a calorie deficit for tens of thousands of dollars while losing weight without bariatric surgery is accomplished by forcing yourself to maintain a calorie deficit for free.

    This is what I needed to hear, a-thank-you! ;)
  • karahm78
    karahm78 Posts: 505 Member
    When you lost 100 pounds before, how long did that take you?
  • PatriNina
    PatriNina Posts: 154 Member
    karahm78 wrote: »
    When you lost 100 pounds before, how long did that take you?

    2 months short of 2 years, but it wasn't with a goal weight in mind, or a timeline to stick to; and I remember the last 10-15 pounds wouldn't budge for weeks :)

  • savithny
    savithny Posts: 1,200 Member
    I"m confused about "too fat to consider other ailments" including testing for PCOS, because PCOS is a major primary cause of obesity.
  • nikolabird
    nikolabird Posts: 52 Member
    That Dr should be ashamed of himself! Comments like that just cause damage.
    I would report him and then request a new Dr.
    You need someone who will support you and help to keep you on the right track regarding health and weightloss.
    Stay strong and I wish you all the best in your journey.
  • LPflaum
    LPflaum Posts: 174 Member
    That doctor is a jerk. However, I suspect he was trying the "scared straight" approach. Statistically, being obese pre-pregnancy is not good:
    - Severely obese women are 43% less likely to achieve pregnancy (a 5'6" woman is obese at 186 lbs) http://www.webmd.com/infertility-and-reproduction/news/20071211/obesity-linked-to-infertility-in-women#1
    - Obesity increases your risk of Gestational Diabetes (which raises the diabetes risk in your children), PreEclampasia (a serious disease that can lead to stroke and premature delivery), and sleep Apnea http://www.acog.org/Patients/FAQs/Obesity-and-Pregnancy
    - Being obese during pregnancy increases your risk of miscarriage, congentital heart defects, neural defects, preterm birth, and stillbirth http://www.acog.org/Patients/FAQs/Obesity-and-Pregnancy
    - Being obese significantly raises the risk of infant death. 32% in the Obese I category and 75% in the Obese II category http://www.bu.edu/sph/2016/01/19/strong-link-between-pre-pregnancy-obesity-and-infant-deaths/

    Can you have a healthy pregnancy and be obese? Absolutely. However (and I am truly not trying to be cruel here), you need to understand that you weren't being fat shamed. Your doctor gave you a medical opinion (in a really insensitive manner), based on the above statistics. It's going to be harder for you than most people. The great thing is that you have the power to change that. Your future is not written in stone.

    You can do this. You want the baby badly enough, you can lose the weight again and you can keep it off because you'll want to be as mobile as possible for that little chunk when he/she does arrive. Just take it one step at at time.
  • STLBADGIRL
    STLBADGIRL Posts: 1,693 Member
    Theo166 wrote: »
    The doctor only had a few minutes to give you a reality check and shock you into turning your health around. If blunt gets the job done, I salute him.

    Yes, but I don't want to pay for that shyt. Some people that type of 'reality check' doesn't work for.
  • SoDamnHungry
    SoDamnHungry Posts: 6,998 Member
    Lots of good advice here. My only comment (since I'm not knowledgeable about weight and fertility): go get a new doctor as soon as possible. He/she is a jerk and suggesting surgery isn't helpful when you're willing to try much healthier methods.
  • lorinoye
    lorinoye Posts: 13 Member
    First of all, you need a new doctor. Preferably one with a little bedside manner. I understand not wanting to sugarcoat things, but damn. Have a little compassion.

    Secondly, I know that conceiving while obese does come with certain risks, but it is not impossible. Both of my sisters are obese (~250-280lbs) and they have 6 healthy children between them. So it's not impossible, but it can make it more difficult.

    Keep your head up and keep plowing forward!
  • GemimaFitzTed
    GemimaFitzTed Posts: 260 Member
    PatriNina wrote: »

    I plan on getting my weight down, and go back to a dr.'s office being considerably lighter, in order to avoid this type of experience again.

    Excellent plan! Like you, I have previously lost close to 100lb in the past, and I am doing it again (after two kids and life throwing me curve balls!). You can lose the weight again, you have the experience.

    At my heaviest, my periods disappeared. As I was losing the weight, my periods came back and are regular as clockwork. At maintenance, I conceived the first month we tried.

    Suggesting surgery is, imho, lazy. When you feel more comfortable about conducting investigations into potential infertility issues, suss out the doctor. Last thing you want is a lazy SoB being your Obgyn during pregnancy.

    Good luck!


  • cassandrarodriguez89
    cassandrarodriguez89 Posts: 239 Member
    I believe that if you want a healthy baby its wise to loose weight if the doctor is concerned. My doctor warning me that gaining more than 35lbs during pregnancy would directly hurt my baby for the rest of his life. So the doctor is right by being concerned. However, if you loose only 50lbs and are still considered obese, yet your eating healthy and staying very active I see no issue in getting pregnant. The effect will be positive on the baby regardless of your size plus you will not gain weight during pregnancy because you will still be loosing weight. My doctor would set heavier girls on diets and exercise regimines to keep their body and babies healthy. He was very sucessful. I think your doctor is absolutely CRAZY for saying you should get surgery!!!! That would still mean your body is unhealthy REGARDLESS of your appearance, which is still bad for the baby. Your goal is not to get pregnant, its to have a healthy baby.
  • liftingmomlife
    liftingmomlife Posts: 47 Member
    plenty of obese women get pregnant all the time without any issue. however, being severely overweight while being pregnant can (and often does) create issues for mom and baby... which can result in a high risk pregnancy. i do know that being super overweight can throw off a woman's cycle, and i've heard that women who have had this issue were able to get regular again once losing some weight. so, that's step one. focus on dropping the weight with the goal of getting your body regular, and as healthy as possible for a little person to grow in. that way, you CAN go back to that gyno if it still doesnt happen and he wouldn't be able to give you that ind of response again. it's a little nuts to me that he was pushing surgery so hard before something natural... i feel like him saying something like, "your weight could be a primary reason as to why you aren't getting pregnant. let's work on that first... come back to me in 6 months for a re-visit and we'll go from there." i mean, sometimes tough love is necessary but goodness gracious! throwing weightloss surgery at you like that is extreme! you've lost the weight before, girl, and you can do it again! ESPECIALLY since you have such an amazing reason to!! good luck, sweetie.
  • cassandrarodriguez89
    cassandrarodriguez89 Posts: 239 Member
    Yeah, dont do surgery! Go natural. And ignore his advice, even if your still obese after loosing 50lbs you can continue the healthy path during pregnancy, still loose weight and STILL HAVE A HEALTHY BABY
  • savithny
    savithny Posts: 1,200 Member
    PatriNina wrote: »
    witchywoman167 wrote: »
    Sorry if I repeat anything that's been said, but I wanted to throw my 2 cents in.
    First of all OP, I sincerely hope you changed doctors.
    Second, are you on birth control pills?
    Third, have you had a complete blood work up and discussed/ been diagnosed with PCOS?
    I am 37 years old, and I'm just now being diagnosed with PCOS, which explains why I got pregnant on 3 separate occasions while on birth control pills.
    Google the symptoms, and if you feel like you have them, discuss it with your (hopefully new) doctor.

    Hello,

    1. Going to find a new doctor.
    2. I've never taken birth control pills.
    3. I've done quite a bit of research on PCOS, but I haven't been diagnosed (or tested - on the count of being "too fat to consider other ailments").

    I plan on getting my weight down, and go back to a dr.'s office being considerably lighter, in order to avoid this type of experience again.

    Please don't make seeing a doctor contingent on getting your weight down - find a doctor who can take more than three minutes to talk to you, who understands what's fact and what's myth, and is NOT taking kickbacks from a bariatric surgeon. A doctor who knows, for example, that PCOS can cause obesity, rather than the other way around.

    But don't wait for weight loss to see a doctor, okay? Many women do that, and it's a vicious cycle:
    https://kateharding.net/2007/07/12/fat-hatred-kills-part-one/

  • nomesw84
    nomesw84 Posts: 101 Member
    It is NOT impossible!

    I fell pregnant with my son when I was about 300lbs and neither my midwife nor consultant were overly concerned by my weight.

    Now, I'm not saying it is the ideal thing, to fall pregnant while obese, however, it does not mean you can't have a perfectly healthy pregnancy.

    Unfortunately my son was born sleeping in September 2016 when I was 7 months pregnant, it was however due to something genetic and NOTHING to do with my weight, it would have happened if I was 100 or 1,000 lbs!

    I am back here now as I want to be in a better place with my weight before I consider another child. It is a possibility we will need to have IVF for genetic reasons therefore I need to lose weight for this to be an option.

    I wish you all the best, please feel free to get in contact if you would like to talk further x
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