We broke up because...
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he complained I was always doing laundry
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She has a fettish involving laundry detergent
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Workout routine was a distraction.
![Bo0g62J.gif[\img]](https://i.imgur.com/Bo0g62J.gif[\img])
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Called his deliberate advances toward me "workouts"0
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I'd catch him watching this ^^ video every night before Sexy time!0
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Always bragging about her independence...
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That's ^^^ the outfit he wore to our wedding0
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She didn't tell me about the other guy0
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She found my internet search history...
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It involved circus clowns and Dwarfs
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She ran away to the circus to be with the clowns and Dwarfs
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She wouldn't let me go watch the circus.0
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He was too much of a clown 0
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It was those darned clown shoes she always wears!0
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Her car was too small for me.0
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I found out he drove this
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Always had 20 guys in her vw bug0
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She didn't like my white caddy!0
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He thought he was a Pimp and called me his B*tch!
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The B*tch wanted me to call her ho and I said no.0
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Had Hohohos all over town!0
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She couldn't tolerate the permanent disfigurement of my soul...0
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He didn't like it when I tried to imitate his New England Accent.0
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He always forgets I live in Maine for part of the year!0
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I cheated on her when she would go to Maine.0
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He kept trying to wrestle alligators in the pool while the kids were trying to swim1
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We disagreed on why little wolf left the lawkeeper.0
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She made me wear a tie everywhere.0
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He carried an inflatable alligator everywhere0
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Dirty rotten cheat!!!0
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