How is it so easy for so many people to eat less?
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When I was your weight I used to cut on 1800-2000ish calories. Now I cut on 1500. I also took a yolo break over the winter where I was probably eating 2500 calories and had to reduce that to 1550 to cut. It's a big adjustment because you get used to eating at a certain time, or certain things... those are all habits you need time to adjust. Hunger is a normal feeling, and you SHOULD feel it... but also be mindful that you're not losing too quickly because that is an indication that your calories are perhaps a bit too low. Everyone is different and I can tell you I cut on this, and someone half your weight may have cut on that... at the end of the day if your data is good the answers you need will be right in front of you
Good luck!1 -
YMMV, but I find that eating more fat helps me a lot, especially at the end of the day. Fat is associated with satiety so it might help to replace some of the carbohydrates you're eating with fats.4
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First of all, the feeling of NOT being stuffed is a great feeling. It means you didn't over eat, you're on track, you have fueled your body properly. I think NOT being stuffed is pleasurable, similar to that post-workout feeling.
It's also very different from hunger. Not being stuffed doesn't mean your stomach is growling and you feel weak or cranky--those feelings are hunger, and you want to eat to avoid that by choosing fruits, vegetables, lean proteins and small amounts of healthy fat.
But I think a lot of it is just learning to embrace leaving a little room. I'm around 135 and maintain at 1600, lose at 1300, and truly and honestly am never hungry (unless I'm at an 11 am meeting that's running really late and I feel better after lunch!!)10 -
I agree with those saying it's mental. The mental part is the hardest part. Those that succeed do it through determination. Most have hungry days where they overeat along the way. But they get back to it. Giving up because of a bad day (or week) solves nothing. Get back to it. Keep getting back to it. Every time.5
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So many great ideas here. Wondering if you could be at peace with including your favorite foods, maybe one a day, and just very small, carefully measured portions? I find I have to have something I love every day, even it's only one small piece of chocolate. As they say, the first couple of bites are the best anyway. Maybe that way you could slowly wean yourself from the larger portions - just knowing you don't have to deprive yourself completely of your favorite foods.4
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You have to find that reason or that motivation to stick with it. When losing weight and/or getting fit becomes as critical as breathing air... you'll be able to do it.4
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I don't think it is really "easy" for anyone, it's just a matter of getting used to it.7
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For me this was all about learning when I am actually hungry and when I'm bored and just mindlessly munching. I identified habits that led to overeating when I wasn't hungry and replaced these with better habits that don't lead to eating.
I started drinking a glass of water 30 mins prior to every meal. I never eat out of a bag and pour a serving size into a bowl or plate. If
You're body isn't used to anything. This is behavior and if you want to change the result you need to change the behavior that provides the result.
Sounds like you tried to stop bad behaviors, but didn't replace these with good behaviors. Our minds are not wired that way. You need to identify habits that lead to overeating and replace these with habits that lead to something else - anything else.
Try this exercise - write down 5 "bad" habits related to overeating. Prioritize these 1 through 5. Scratch off 2 through 5. Identify a behavior you can replace with #1. Keep doing this until it becomes part of your daily routine. Repeat this exercise.
Long term success comes from small changes that have dramatic impact in the long term. Drastic changes rarely lead to success.9 -
I had to get used to being hungry and the people around me had to get used to me being the north end of a southbound donkey. Some things that helped me stick with it until it became a habit....
Pre-log your day (or week) with a meal plan and only purchase the foods on your meal plan.
Don't carry extra cash with you so that you aren't tempted to stop and purchase more food.
If you eat all your calorie by noon, be done for the day...it's the hard way, but it quickly taught me to regulate my intake.
Reducing my intake of soda and sweet tea.
If 16:8, works for you...use it! Putting the time restriction on my intake helps me psychologically prepare for how my day of training and eating is going to go.
If you have a small treat and go over calories, it's not the end of the world...spread it out into calorie burn with walking or running over the next few days.6 -
Weight loss is simple: create a sustained calorie deficit according to the equation CI<CO.
Weight loss is not easy: there are myriad complicating factors that make it challenging to stay the course.
Making a series of small changes that you can build on over time is something that many people have success with and see slow, steady progress that they can stick with. Going for big, drastic changes and looking for significant short term results often is a recipe for failure.
When I started here on MFP about 4 years ago, I quickly realized that cutting things out was not going to be sustainable for me. Instead, I decided to add things to my lifestyle: More protein, more vegetables, more whole grains, more exercise, more every day activity, more sleep. By doing all this, a little bit at a time, the healthy habits and choices took precedent over the less healthy habits: but by not restricting things I love I was still able to fit in things like ice cream, cookies, pizza and wine in moderation. I lost the weight I set out to lose in about a years time, and have been successfully maintaining since; and never felt that the process was particularly hard or challenging to sustain. Not that there weren't setbacks, there always will be, but by having a reasonable plan, when you get off course it's relatively straightforward to get back on track.
Good luck OP. Just keep swimming!13 -
It's not easy. It will NEVER been easy. I lost my weight in 2011, and I've been up and down upwards of 20lbs since. As soon as I think I have things under control, my mind decides it doesn't want to behave any more and it's all over.
What I find that works is: Never cut ANYTHING out. Pre-log your day and if you can't at least plan ahead as much as possible. Allow yourself treats - then it won't feel like deprivation. Find an activity that you love. It won't feel like a burden then. Go slow. There's no deadline and trust me, Maintainance is HARD. Try and work on a habit for 14 days. Then when you have that one under control, try another. Learning to say NO is the biggest hurdle I had. I used to do whatever I wanted - eat everything on my plate and sometimes other peoples. I had a major regular Soda habit that added 100's of calories to my day without me even noticing.3 -
I think for many of us what is necessary is structure and a plan, and many people think it's just about willpower and don't create a structure and a plan and then get frustrated when they impulsively overeat or are over calories before noon or some such. IMO, if I didn't start with a plan and structure, OF COURSE that would happen.
My personal plan (although everyone's will be different) is to eat 3 meals, with a basic template in my mind for each of them. Breakfast is largely the same every day (there's some variation, nothing major), I premake lunch or have a few default options that I go to, and dinner is based on a basic plan that will be filled in by the foods available. For example, it used to be protein (usually meat/fish), vegetables, starch, and now that I'm low carbing more strictly it substitutes higher fat additions and maybe more veg for the starch. Point is it's pretty standard and takes the thinking out of it. Because I know I don't snack/eat between meals, I am less likely to be tempted to (this takes a week or so to get in the habit of), and if I am tempted I can think about the delicious meal I will have quite soon (a few hours is still quite soon). Every once in a while I might decide to indulge, but I log it and plan in advance how it will fit in.
Now, I do find this hard sometimes. It was not very hard when I had a lot of weight to lose, because then when I wanted to break my plan/pattern, I had a STRONG reason why I did not want to -- I had specific goals, short term (fulfill my weekly eating plan, say) and longer term (lose 8 lbs this month, perhaps), and visualized why it mattered. I think one really hard part about dieting is you think, eh, what's one day as eating this will make no meaningful difference in how fat I am and not eating it won't make me thinner. You need to find a way to think longer term, and for me having my weekly and daily plan fit into a longer term one and knowing if I fulfilled it I would be 150 by October (or close, or whatever it was) and 142 by December and so on, and visualizing the long term results, made it real. Importantly for me I added in other goals that weren't weight-specific, like riding my bike a certain distance or running a particular race or lifting a particular amount.
I am struggling more at maintenance, since it's harder to see it as part of a longer term plan and have a strong why. (I'm maintaining okay, but I can't seem to care enough to lose more weight, as I no longer feel like it's important that I do it NOW vs. 2 weeks from now, and move the ultimate goal back 2 weeks too.) But that's not your current problem.10 -
Usually the problem is that you're either not eating what you should be eating, or you're idle a lot and eat because you're bored. Hunger happens when you miss that feeling of being full or you're bored. There are changes you can make to your diet that will allow you to eat enough to feel full but be low in calories. It's probably going to mean eating more vegetables, low fat meats, low fat cheese, low fat cottage cheese, low fat milk, etc. etc. You likely need to make changes, not try to be at such a high deficit and just go with it. I gave up a lot of the crap I used to eat (like cinnamon rolls, doughnuts for every breakfast, pancakes, waffles, many deserts, and snacking. That's not to say I don't eat those things occasionally but I don't plan my day around them any longer. I try not to be idle for more than an hour or two at night because otherwise I want to snack. Weekends are the worst so I find things to keep me busy and keep me on my feet if possible. It's all about changing your lifestyle. If you can't change your diet and lifestyle then you have no other option but to increase/add calorie burning exercise to make up the difference. For most people that's not sustainable long term.
Try opening your diary so people can see what you eat and make some suggestions. Here are a few of the substitutions I made:
-Almond milk instead of 2% or whole milk. I'll choose the unsweetened vanilla or lightly sweetened vanilla kind. It's easily half the calories of milk and tastes better if you ask me.
-I eat more chicken, turkey, lean meats. I stay away from hot dogs, bratwurst, hamburger (unless its lean) whenever possible. I eat leaner cuts of pork as well.
-I don't cook with butter if I can avoid it, and I certainly try to never fry things. I'll bake if possible instead. I may use a light coat or spray of EVOO and bake it instead of frying something in oil.
-I learned to like a lot of steamed vegetables as sides.
-I learned to eat a microwaved/baked potato as a side with most meals. Carbs are not your enemy, calories are. Potatoes have fiber and carbs, and are tasty. I simply use a low fat topping like fat free ranch or low fat sour cream salt and pepper on it.
-Sweet potatoes are another option, high in potassium.
-I learned to make higher protein low fat salads using low fat/low calorie dressings. Most of the calories in a salad is from the dressing, so watch that stuff!
-When BBQ'ing I try to use less sauce. I try to season things well enough that less sauce is needed.
-I eat high fiber/low calorie cereals with almond milk for breakfast
-I don't eat fast food very often, and when I do I go to Subway or something similar or if we go out I order the lower calorie menu items.
Those are just some tips to reduce your calories but keep volume of food high. Most people could easily hit a hair under 2000 calories a day without trying with most of those substitutions without any effort and feel full. I've even hit 1800 at times and been too full to eat more. I also work out early in the AM so I go to bed early. It reduces idle time at night in front of the TV.
Just some suggestions. Try taking a 2500 to 2600 calorie day and look back at it and find things you could have done differently to eat the same foods (or similar) and reduce the calories to what your deficit should be. My guess is you could do it and eat the same volume of food. That should give you an idea of the changes you need to make going forward.7 -
AniaMania81 wrote: »I need help. I'm starting to think that I will never be able to lose weight. I've been trying to lose about three years now but it's not working. I lose a pound and quickly gain it back. I can't seem to stick to eating less, I will do it for one or two days at a time (three for the most) and then I get hungry and eat too much. I started off wanting to lose 25 pounds three years ago and since then I have gained another 30 pounds. I am 5'9" and currently 215 pounds and need to get to 160.
I think my maintenance is about 2250 but I normally eat about 2500 so that is what my body is used to. I try reducing to between 1750 and 2000 and to exercise consistently. I'll make it a few days and then feel crazy hungry and overeat again. I tried IF 16:8 and that helped a lot but again, hard to stick to.
On average I eat probably 100 to 120 grams of protein, maybe 100 grams of fat and about 300 grams of carbs. I know it's a lot. I normally exercise about twice a week and with this I gain about a pound a month.
I eat healthy foods everyday - fruit and vegetables, a variety of meat (not processed), beans, oatmeal etc but I eat a lot of unhealthy, high calorie foods too.
Anyone else experienced this and overcame it? I would really appreciate and welcome all thoughts and advice. Thanks for reading.
You've grown accustomed to eating more than you need. You might not even know what true hunger feels like. Lots of what we may think of as hunger, is nothing more than BOREDOM. It's HABIT. You are going to have to get though a couple of weeks of eating less, in order to get your mind and body used to it. It really comes down to sheer determination and willpower. How bad do you want it? Are you going to let food rule your mind and body? Start new habits. Start walking every day. A mile, then 2 then 3, every day. Get up each morning and weigh yourself. EVERY DAY. Track your calories, EVERY DAY. Put sticky notes around your house - NO JUNK FOOD. EAT HEALTHY. I RULE MY OWN BODY.
And do not reward yourself with FOOD. You are not a dog. New clothes are a wonderful reward.
Are you logging food here?5 -
A lot of good stuff here. If I had that same problem, I would consider making the change a little more gradually. Focus on one small thing at a time. If you eat 2500 a day, consider one substitute or one macro change to bring it to 2250. Stay there for a few weeks. Repeat.
There is no need to lose "as fast as possible". The need is to lose...period. So train yourself. You can't lift heavy weights without lifting light first. It takes training. If you know yourself, give yourself a chance. This is a lifetime lifestyle choice. It can happen over time. You just have to start.4 -
I'm another who had a tough time with just cutting back on calories. I rarely lasted longer than a couple of weeks, although I lasted a few months a couple of times. It was not primarily mental for me but rather that I can't be hungry all the time, That combined with reactive hypoglycemia left me feeling cranky, dizzy and tired. It wasn't sustainable. Too hard.
Like others, I found changing my food made the greatest difference. That was when it got "easy" for me. The only hard part was the first week or two while getting used to new foods (in my case, low carb and high fat - no refined foods or sugars). It required some willpower to avoid those foods, but I found it less so than when I would eat just a bit and then try to stop.
For people like me, abstinence from certain foods is an easier way to go. I just needed to accept that eating my "normal way" is what helped me gain weight so I can't eat that way anymore.
Good luck.3 -
.. dupe!
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Increasing activity also has helped me a lot. I bike to work. That's 40 min of cycling in a day, which adds a couple hundred calories to my budget, which takes me from "no room to eat anything but the basics" to "I can have what I need and a bit of what I want".
If it was easy, no one would get fat. It's not easy for anyone, it's a choice to make changes and stick to them.3 -
"How is it so easy for so many people to eat less?"
Just to respond directly to this: It's not. I've lost 130+ pounds. None of it was "easy". Simple? Sure. Easy? Absolutely not. It took months of building new better eating habits, took months for my palette to readjust. If it was easy everyone would be fit
For tips/recommendations, reduce sugars and simple flours to reduce cravings. Otherwise 90% of this is going to be pure will power. It was for me, and still is. It's still not easy.13 -
I like kommodevaran's response - first you get real and honest with yourself.
First thing I is to accept the boundaries (you can't have it all - just like with everything in life, I suppose...). In some ways I think some have it "easier" in the sense that they have grown up with a healthier mindset towards food, so they have something to revert back to.
Growing up, we had healthy breakfasts, healthy lunches and healthy dinners. We had "splurge" dinners in the weekends (pizza, pasta, tacos) and sweets saturday night. Now I am not saying that is the only way to go - as an adult, I can have these things during weekdays, either in a healthier version or in a moderate amount.
But the point is the mindset behind it - you can't have exactly what you want to eat, all the time, in whichever amount you want. You make priorities.
It's really the same way you manage your money, unless you want to end up in bottomless debt. You really can't have a designer dress whenever you want one, unless you save for it (or the equivalent - workout for it).9 -
Are you always changing how you eat AND starting exercise at the same time? Start with one or the other not both.
Change one thing, master it, then add another. When I say master the small change I don't mean for a week I mean for a month or more, then add the next one. This is a lifestyle, forever, you didn't build bad habits overnight and you won't build better habits overnight either.
Small things, examples (do one at a time)- Reduce by 100 cals at a time
- Exercise for 20 minutes
- Eat only at maintenance
- Give up sodas
- Drink more water (and measure and log it)
That said, you will have some hunger, phantom hunger, and you have to power through it. Have a plan to tackle those moments. Drinks lots of water, stay busy, chew on strays, walk in circles, whatever.
Don't focus on losing weight, focus on feeling better, being healthier.
Forgive yourself when you slip but get right back on the wagon.2 -
When I focus on foods that satiate me, I'm only hungry right before meals. I found more protein and less fast carbs like bread made from flour keeps me fuller. I still eat "junk" but much less of it. When I have pizza, I have less slices and eat it with a big salad.
Prelogging helps considerably - I'll often decide a not-filling food is just not worth the calories.2 -
Easy answer - you are eating too many calories which will keep you at a maintenance level. I suggest the carbs are too high (making you hungrier); and you are eating too much treats. You need to write down everything you eat and drink, so that you can see right there what exactly you are eating. Do that for a couple weeks. You are eating more than you think. If you eat 500 calories a day less, you would lose a pound a week (for most people).1
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Easy (but takes a lot of work, practice, and a few falls here and there.)
I want to be thinner. I want that more than food.
I fill up on protien, fibre fat and liquids, let carbs fall wherever and still include treats.
Make this work for YOU.5 -
There's certainly a mental aspect to it, but in my case and I suspect a lot of people's cases it's not that simple. Without getting too detailed, blood sugar problems can contribute to it, and seem to be pretty common. You might want to ask your doctor about getting your blood sugar tested, and for suggestions about dealing with the results.
I have had great results with a low-glycemic diet. The cravings that I used to experience are just not there any more. You might ask your doctor about that. A couple of popular ones that are easy to follow are the DASH diet and the South Beach diet, and you can get free information online about both of those.1 -
I agree with everyone else that it is easy for only a very, very few. It's difficult for the rest of us. I disagree that it's mostly mental. Certainly, there are difficult mental challenges to it.
For some of us, it is physical. I'm often hungry. Sometimes I have the willpower to be hungry for a few weeks and follow my eating plan. Other times, I can tough out the hunger for a year or more. But I'm still hungry almost every hour of almost every day. I wake up in the middle of the night with my stomach growling. I wake up weak and shaky from hunger most mornings. I have no blood sugar-type issues that would cause this...I'm just hungry. And ignoring the hunger is like holding your breath...you can do it for only so long before you just give in and take a deep breath (or eat until you're satisfied).
I do find that eating a lot more fat than your average dietician recommends helps. And eating more protein, too. Keeping carbs in the lower ranges of 100-140ish grams a day helps. Eating lots of vegetables for volume helps. Learning new habits over the course of months or years helps. But none of it completely eliminates the problem.
Years ago, I found it interesting to watch the nursing habits of some infants in my family. Some would eat a normal amount and then stop. Others would not stop until mama pulled them away from the breast, and even then they were crying for more. They'd had plenty of milk, were well nourished and a healthy, chubby baby, but were still unsatisfied. I think that continues into adulthood for some of us. We never get full physically even though our nutritional and caloric needs are well met.
I don't know how to fix that, so at this point, it's just discipline and willpower.5 -
It really is amazing that along the way, I learned 2 hardboiled eggs have fewer calories and kept me fuller, longer than a candy bar. I used to eat 150 calorie granola bars, think it was sufficient, and be starving an hour later. I would have the same thought- how do people lose weight like this? The answer is, they aren't eating like that- they did change something about their diet (more protein/fat/fiber for satiety, or portion control, etc). I personally have upped my protein intake and I feel so much better while still losing weight. And I chose the foods I like that have more protein or whatever- it doesn't even feel like deprivation most days. I also learned I eat most of my calories at dinner and I "save" most of my calories for this time (700-1000) and I feel like I can enjoy what I want for dinner.
This is just want has been working for me- and it has taken a lot of personal reflection, tracking, and consistency to find what is working and what is not working.
As others say, its not easy but it is simple. You need to find something that works for you, and stick with it- the results will come and you can absolutely do it without feeling like you are absolutely starving all the time.7 -
Relying on willpower and "just eating less" is really not a strategy at all. If that's all someone is doing, they're almost certainly setting themselves up to fail. There are actual strategies that people use to adapt to eating at a deficit, but the one that works for you may be highly individual, and most people pull from different strategies at once. I'm really not sure why we don't talk more about this concept, because it isn't just toughing it out mentally; there are concrete skills involved.
Some of the strategies that people use include:- Eating the same foods they were eating before, but in smaller amounts
- Making lower-calorie food swaps (like nonfat or 2% milk in place of whole milk)
- Eating higher-volume, lower-calorie foods because they like the feeling of fullness
- Using IF or high/low calorie days
- Starting off with a smaller deficit to ease yourself into it (rather than going for a significant deficit right off the bat)
- Incorporating exercise so you have a higher calorie budget to play with
- Cutting out liquid calories first so you can continue to eat the volume of food you're used to
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Poisonedpawn78 wrote: »How do they do it? They are cyborgs. I don't get it either. Anyone who can blithely say, "log it!" or "it's all mental!" Doesn't understand the complexities of what you and I suffer from. And what so many other people suffer from.
I dont know if this happens to you, but for me when i go grocery shopping, that junk pop/chip/candy isle calls out to me constantly. I would try and avoid the isle but In the past i would cave and go get something every time. For every healthy choice i made, i would say, i could totally get a pop or some chips too.. we all know how that ends.
The last 2 months I have gone to the isle and stared at every single thing that i wanted and mentally said to myself. I love you, but i will NOT buy you today. Forcing myself to stare "the devil" down.
And then Caramel M&Ms happened...sweet baby jesus those things are good. I need an intervention.
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