We broke up because...
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He said he was going to go get donuts. I waited all excited and he never came back0
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Tricked me into losing a bet just for free drinks.
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In trying to do something nice I brought donuts home and she didn't recognize me....had no clue who I was. Ended up shooting me in my pinky toe before I ran away....0
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She got more excited over the box of Donuts I bought her than the sexy Boudoir photos I gave her0
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she wouldn't feed my donut cravings0
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Won't let me watch hockey because it was too violent0
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Every time we watched hockey together she would bad mouth my beloved Blackhawks!!0
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He got violent when his Blackhawks lost0
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She mocked the Leafs. Granted I did too but I'm allowed to0
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I mocked the Leafs....apparently I'm not allowed to
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All he cared Bout was hockey and not my feelings0
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He wouldn't let me stroke his beard0
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She only wanted to stroke my beard...Noth...well you get the point!0
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The only thing he wanted stroked was his ego
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She insisted I brunch her hair like 152 strokes a nite. It was tiring0
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Lol! She always had food on her mindAliNouveau wrote: »She insisted I brunch her hair like 152 strokes a nite. It was tiring
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She never let me eat.0
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She doesn't approve of my humor so I won't comment!
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She didn't believe in the moon landing.0
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She kept claiming that she had actually been to the moon.0
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He went to jail for Mooning a cop0
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She still pined for her jailed lover0
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She stopped coming for the conjugal visits.0
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He fell in love with Big Bubba in jail
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She went to Prison for paying an Inmate to shank Big Bubba0
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She was behind the whole Bubba shanking0
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She was a one-upper. She'd have a better version of every one of my stories.1
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Her stories always put me to sleep!1
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She would belch like a trucker, and then look at me excitedly for approval.1
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Her futch ovrns were lethal..I died 0
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