Was called a whale yesterday



  • OregonRunner5
    OregonRunner5 Posts: 404 Member
    That's terrible :( Some people are so evil and don't know how to support or build others and just try to scrap out some self-worth by taring others down.

    I don't have a lot of advice except, be kind to yourself. Maybe do a little sluething, how do you feel after particular meals? (grains make me tired, eggs always make my hungrier). What meals would be easy to swap? (In my 30's I started brown bagging my lunch everyday to work and that made a big difference).

    Make gentle kind changes in your life to treat yourself like the queen bee your are and maybe see a good doctor. My weight is primarily hormone related. My daughter has PCOS and her weight is hormones. If you want to get weight loss surgery, a few friends of mine have done that with great results.

    You are always free to say, "No, this does not work for me." Period. It doesn't work for you move on. I've tried a myriad of different diets on for size just to see if they would work for me. Usually there was something about them I liked and kept and it was useful to have the experience and learn more about food.

    Personally I deleted my Facebook account. I know that's almost unheard of, but it was a major source of anxiety in my day. I now share with my family via e-mail, postcards and phone calls. I miss it sometimes, but it sucked down a lot of time and was very distracting. It also gave me unfair messages about myself (I'm such a loser) and helped shape my internal sense of reality (like how the country was on fire and everything was doomed). After withdrawing for months from that, my focus is better, my anxiety is down and I'm thinking better for myself.

    So yeah, beware of groups giving advice - ever! Haha. Good luck to you! ((Hugs))
  • mygrl4meee
    mygrl4meee Posts: 943 Member
    I am sorry you were mistreated. I am struggling a bit myself right now. I lost 100 pounds but slowly gained 30 back.. Right now my goal is just to log my calories. I don't care if I am over.. Just admit the good and bad. Take it a day at a time and make small goals. I hope to start coming being at my calorie goal next Monday.
  • walktalkdog
    walktalkdog Posts: 102 Member
    Hi! My name is Amanda and I have been battling with my weight since I had my first son 10 years ago. When I sit back and think that I let myself go to this point it makes me sick to my stomach. I had one child after another and gained almost a hundred pounds each from both of them. Here I am now at 380 lb and struggling with fun activities I want to do with my children. Not to mention being fat-shamed and called things like a whale on Facebook on the daily from people I don't know. It really brings down your self-esteem and makes you sometimes feel like you don't even want to live anymore. Here I am 30 years old with really a great life. We own our house our car I have been married for five years and my children are 9 and 10. I run a successful business and my husband loves me unconditionally. Even though I have such a great life the one thing holding me back the most is my weight. I can't ride rides with the kids when we go on vacation I can't run around in the backyard with them and play football, and I get out of breath even walking up the stairs to kiss them goodnight. I have been on my fitness pal for a long time but just yesterday for restarted my journey. I want to live and even better life than what I am now. I want to be able to shop in the regular section at the store. I want to be able to buy an awesome pair of tall boots that will fit around my swollen ankles. I want to roll around in the snow and build a snowman with my kids. I'm on here opening myself up like this because I feel like I need more people backing me up so that I can succeed. my only support is my husband and while i love him and is so grateful for him, i really need some friends to help push me! Thank you for reading!

    Reading that some idiot (that doesn't even know you!) on Facebook called you whale is making my blood boil. I hope you are proud of all of your accomplishments; your beautiful family and your own home, car, and business. I understand about being unhappy with your extra weight. May I recommend baby steps, one day at a time, one accomplishment at a time. Set small goals for yourself. Maybe such as walk up the stairs x times per day for one week, then raise that number the next week, and so forth. You will also need to devise a food plan, and be careful with it, which is very difficult with small children, as it's so easy for mom to just eat what they don't, instead of throwing it away. But changing your mindset, again, small, doable changes in small increments, is key.

    Logging every morsel is challenging at times, but it works. Reading the posts on this site are helpful, I think. You got this, girl!
  • RunawayCurves
    RunawayCurves Posts: 688 Member
    I am finding eating high fiber and eliminating most processed stuff especially processed sugar is able to remove food cravings and stop hunger.
  • GiddyupTim
    GiddyupTim Posts: 2,819 Member
    I applaud you for wanting to make changes. That is brave and admirable! Many people have success here. Good luck!
  • try2again
    try2again Posts: 3,562 Member
    edited November 2017
    pinuplove wrote: »
    1. Cut whoever is calling you a whale out of your life completely. They're not worth the time it took you to read that comment, much less any time spent fretting about it.

    2. Complete your fitness profile here and start diligently logging your food and activity.

    3. Read the forum stickies if you haven't already.

    4. Add friends if you'd like, but don't think of them as a means to push or motivate you. Think of it as a way to keep the journey fun and interesting. Like road tripping with a group of friends rather than driving across Kansas on your own with no radio :lol:

    Just loved this post! That was the first thing I thought... OP, you need to go through and either unfriend people or adjust your privacy settings.

    The second thing I thought was, you can absolutely do this! I'm a lot older than you, but also found myself with young kids that I couldn't keep up with and was feeling bad, physically & mentally, all the time. Don't focus on the overwhelming picture of needing to lose X amount of weight. Set up your profile with a reasonable weekly goal, and just focus each day on the number you need to hit... that's all. Don't overthink it, or try to overhaul your entire lifestyle. Just meet your calorie goal. I know I expected to feel deprived, but when you start of bigger (like I did), you still can eat plenty & lose. Welcome & wish you the best! :)
  • rebben23
    rebben23 Posts: 24 Member
    It's all about you - something will click, the pieces will align, and you will do IT. Hopping onto MyFitnessPal is a great start :)

    I've been called "fat" by complete strangers in public. It cuts like a knife.
  • brightresolve
    brightresolve Posts: 1,024 Member
    lorrpb wrote: »
    You've listed all the reasons you want to do this. If that doesn't push you, no one else can. What this site can do is give you tools that help you accomplish your goals.

    You have a lot of changes to make and no one can make all of them at once. Start by getting a food scale, weigh, and log everything you eat. Don't worry about what to change until you've done that for 2 weeks. Then you can make a plan for a series of Small changes

    This, in addition to the other great and insightful things! YOU CAN DO THIS. You did list all your reasons and they are good ones. Write them down in a note on your phone, stickynote on the refrigerator, 3x5 next to your debit card ... wherever it will remind you when you feel your knees wobble and your resolve soften, and we all do. Losing weight is a journey of single, small choices done "right enough" (not perfectly!) over a long, patient period of time. And that food scale and the logging will help you find out what "right enough" is for you.

    Good luck! Sent you a FR!
  • huntersvonnegut
    huntersvonnegut Posts: 1,176 Member
    All I'll add is that I wish you happiness and health. Whatever form that takes.
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    Here’s a quote to inspire.


    With others I agree that you can change your privacy settings on Facebook. The motive to drive you forward is being to do more stuff with your children. The increased vitality gains are so, so, wonderful.

    I suggest small weekly goals as in, go for three walks this week. Then re evaluate. Keep doing what works and make small changes where you need to.

    Everest is conquered by staging camps. The successful climbers focus on getting to the next camp. That’s it.
  • LearningToFly13
    LearningToFly13 Posts: 329 Member
    You can succeed if you put your mind to it, not because of your husband or anyone else.

    If you do it because of other people you are automatically setting yourself up to fail with a handy excuse of 'it was their fault, they didn't support me'.

    This. People can't make changes for you and they wont always actively encourage and support you. Sad but true. Do it for you because you deserve better and because you can. You can do anything you put your mind to. But you have to start. ...
  • dejavuohlala
    dejavuohlala Posts: 1,821 Member
    Cut all the contact with those that call you names that is going to be detrimental to your weight loss success. To start with log all your food and drink honestly, make a point of logging on MFP everyday and gradually increase your mobility. Enlist the help of some good supportive friends on MFP and if you keep an open food diary we can help you with food choices if that is what you want. Good luck and show those loser name callers what you have achieved.
  • wefts
    wefts Posts: 183 Member
    best advise I can give is chart every day even if you go over your calories , water and fiber are your friends , fiber in its many forms helps keep you full . I am almost half way to my goal in 6 months , and with out fiber supplements and fiber rich foods like broth based soups full of high fiber vegetables , I would not have made it this far . Hunger is the enemy,, plan your day so you are not hungry ,do not wait until you are super hungry to plan meals or snacks , hunger can make you crave things that are not healthy choices, and make you eat in quantities that will slow your progress . I do not mean only eat low cal foods , make sure you save some calories for your favorite foods because you do not want to feel deprived . if you are too strict you will get frustrated.
    you can do this, we are here .