I Have Noticed Many People Returning, Having Regained Their Weight ...

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  • lucerorojo
    lucerorojo Posts: 790 Member
    edited January 2018
    jennrissa wrote: »
    The 1st time I started losing weight I wasn't using mfp. I ended up gaining weight because a "friend" would convince i.e. claim she couldn't eat unless the person with her was eating too and force my orders to be large instead of the small I asked for, and would claim 10 minutes on the treadmil was all that was needed and then take us to her place so she could spend time on her phone. No surprise I ended up gaining what I lost and then some. I ended up being my heaviest of 240 with her. I was shocked when I saw the number and joined mfp. I usually gain weight back when the school semesters are out and I didn't have access to a gym. Then to top it off I'm an emotional eater. I was raised in the way that everytime something bad happened i would be given food, so it had been my way of dealing with stressful situations. So I've struggled about 4 times losing the same 10-15 pounds in the past 2 years. It's taken me that long to learn to not eat my emotions and that I need to pick healthier options.

    I hope this "friend" treated you (paid for your meal) every time she "forced" you to eat with her. Doesn't sound like a friend at all. Is this what they mean by a "frenemy"? With friends like that... if she didn't even buy your food that is crazy!
  • jessiemax76
    jessiemax76 Posts: 12 Member
    I have lost significant weight for me twice. First time I lost 20 kgs and was in excellent shape. Went on medication for depression and appetite and cravings for foods I had never eaten were crazy, gained it all back. Second time I lost about 12 kg and gained it back as I was just in a bad place, very depressed and just didn't care. Both times I lost the weight being very very restrictive and exercising excessively, I also have had body dysmorphia. When you have mental health issues around weight its just really hard sometimes.
    I am now ready to lose it, which means for me being moderate, eating enough and of everything, and no extreme exercise marathons. My plan is to monitor my weight when I hit goal and keep everything in check.
  • SanaAnum
    SanaAnum Posts: 61 Member
    I kept it off for 2 years.
    Then got married and gained back plus 15 kg.
    One should be careful and not indulge in previous habits.
    Now doing it again to keep it off for lifetime.
  • Nenusky
    Nenusky Posts: 37 Member
    Great thread!
    I lost all the weight i needed to in 16 months, kept it off for 2.5 years, started eating mindlessly and stopped tracking my intake. I gained 22 pounds back out of the 35 i'd initially lost over a year ( i was still exercising).
    Now i'm back to tracking and the weight has started falling off again...so i have to make it a part of me.
  • MissyCHF
    MissyCHF Posts: 337 Member
    edited January 2018
    Is this a confessional? Okay, I eat too much and I'm a chocoholic. No excuses...
  • kazminchu
    kazminchu Posts: 250 Member
    I gained 25lbs back because I never learned how not to use food as an emotional crutch, so a hard year left me binge-eating for weeks at a time and not caring enough to change it.

    I still haven't learned, and I don't think I ever will. I'm okay with the fact I will likely just be yo-yoing (but not as extreme) for the rest of my life. I have an upper limit which kicks me back into gear so I'll never get as bad as I was again.
  • ladyhusker39
    ladyhusker39 Posts: 1,406 Member
    Mellykay88 wrote: »
    I didn’t read all of the posts, so someone may have already said this, but I wanted to give my take on WHY people don’t maintain. I’m 120 lbs into my weigh loss and am a long way from maintenance, but I hope to prepare myself for that part well before it gets here.

    I’m a drug and alcohol counselor, and if we look at obesity and over-eating through the lens of addiction, it makes sense that people regain (relapse). In the addiction treatment field we look at how people change and progress through the “stages of change” from pre-contemplation (not thinking about change at all) to maintenance. Addiction is viewed as a life long illness that requires continuous work. When a person relapses, they leave the maintenance stage and regress to a lower stage. This doesn’t always mean that they go back to the beginning and have to start over. Instead, in most cases, they learn something from the relapse and work back to maintenance. With each relapse or slip they learn more (though depending on circumstances it may take years to get back on track). From reading stories about weight loss, I feel this a pretty good comparison. Many of us will relapse (regain), but if we have a good plan, we will learn from our mistakes and get back on track. Hopefully, we will eventually experience long-term change (recovery). Addicts are encouraged to continue going to meetings for support and I think that for those of us who have lost weight or are losing, support from people on similar paths is crucial to long-term change.

    I hope that makes sense. Sorry if I rambled. :blush:

    Thanks for this post.

    I'm curious what the thought is among addiction treatment professionals about foods/eating/sugar, etc as an addiction. Can you speak to this at all? I'd even be interested in your personal opinion/experience of this very heated issue on this site.
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,783 Member
    I lost about 60 lbs in 14-16 months (from 232 to 176) by counting calories and dedicated exercise, mostly in the way of daily walks, hikes and cycling. I trained from Dec 2014 to April 2015 to ride in a 2-day, 150 mile charity bike ride (I hadn't ridden a bike since I was in middle school - I was 52 when I was training). I thought I had it figured out.

    And I did until I had knee surgery in mid 2015. Recovery was, well, recovery and it took me a while to be up to my previous level of activity. Then, in early 2016, I took on a "part-time" retail job (in addition to my W-F 8-5 "real job") to help with wedding expenses for my daughter. The part time job morphed into 25-30+ hrs a week and I literally didn't have the time (or energy) to walk, hike and ride. Shortly after my daughter's wedding, my step-daughter announced her engagement. So the part time job continued. I was able to quit in April 2017, but by that time, I had gained back about 30+lbs. I attribute that weight gain to a big decrease in activity (and I LOVE my walks, etc - good for mental as well as physical health) and an increase in stress eating (busy, busy schedule - no time to eat good, meal planning etc or just plain worn out tired).

    So, I'm back to the drawing board. But it has been slow. Hopefully 2018 will be the year that I can lose another 60 lbs to get down to my goal of 140-150ish pounds.

    Successful weight loss and maintenance is a lifestyle change, but sometimes life gets in the way...
  • mordant57
    mordant57 Posts: 58 Member
    I was in a bad car accident a year ago, which halted all exercise. Got depressed and inactive...finally changing things for the better. While I didn’t gain TOO much weight, I am so very out of shape now.
  • ms_havisham
    ms_havisham Posts: 42 Member
    I have lost and gained repeatedly over the last 20 years, not just since I began MFP years ago. I have Crohn's Disease and flare-ups cause me to lose weight quickly and then meds, illness, or surgery lead me to pack it on. I would tend to diet to lose, but with my focus only on numbers I would often lose the weight far too quickly and that would make me sick, beginning the whole vicious cycle again. A friend and I have been working at this for nearly a year now, and the key phrase is "sustainable change". Changing diet in a way that we trust ourselves to maintain in the future (including cheesy delicious fattening food but keeping it in its place) and choosing exercise that we actually enjoy as much as possible. We keep goals reachable and reasonable, planning for off days so they don't feel like a failure and lead to disappointment and discouragement. It is meant to be a positive change, so if it makes me feel bad about myself then I am doing it wrong :smiley: so far I have lost over 40 pounds, and that is with a several month hiatus while I figured out what I could do with a broken ankle that didn't want to heal. I am happy with my progress and feel better for having lost the weight a bit more slowly than I used to. And I set a reasonable goal weight... starting at 215 lbs and set a goal of 150 lbs. I wanted something that felt reachable, and from past experience, I knew I could become scale obsessed, thinking I should lose tons more weight while being able to count ribs. I decided to set a more moderate goal and reevaluate when I know what body I have when I get there. Well over half way there and looking forward to seeing what my life looks like. My best friend did the same thing, reached her goal weight, and reset it for a few more pounds. She met her goal and did amazing, and is just maintaining now.
  • steveko89
    steveko89 Posts: 2,223 Member
    Would you have stayed on mfp longer, tracking, until you had been in maintenance for a year?
    A: I've stayed on MFP through losses and regains. I will continue to use it regardless of what my current goal. That said, since losing weight in high school I've never exceeded the upper limit for a "healthy" weight for my height by more than a few pounds (164-183lbs for 6'1" male per TDEECalculator.net). If I gain weight my log will tell you why, I've either skipped logging meals or whole days, or I consumed far more than my calorie target.

    Would you have lost weight less aggressively so that it was easier to adjust to maintenance?
    A: I'll probably never adjust to maintenance, or I did five years ago and I'm bad at it. It's probably symptomatic of some level of body dysmorphia, but regardless of my weight I've never looked in the mirror and thought "I'm done". I always see something to improve, trim more fat or gain more muscle

    Was your entire focus on the weight loss rather than on changing your entire lifestyle?
    A: Upon that first week of logging I realized I needed to make permanent changes and focus on sustainability rather than just being on or off the wagon. Six years removed from that learning experience my nutrition still isn't perfect, ergo I will continue to work to improve it, much like my physique.

    Did something health related come up that caused you to 'fall off the proverbial wagon' ?
    A: I feel as though I've not let myself come all the way off the wagon, as it were, since that weight gain in 2011. Sure have there been occasions of getting sloppy with what/how much I ate and gained 5-10 lbs? Absolutely, and that was no one's fault but my own.
  • tripitena
    tripitena Posts: 554 Member
    While I am returning, I havent regained exactly. I spent a cpl yrs struggling with seizures and finding a DX. With all the meds and downtime I didn't gain but DID allow myself to become dependent on others to bring me meals and too much was fast food, meat, cheese and crap. I couldn't safely get much exercise so I have zero muscle.
    I'm not back for weight loss but dietary and safe activity ideas. MFP is more than a weight loss and fitness tool for me. :)
  • dsboohead
    dsboohead Posts: 1,899 Member
    docc30 wrote: »
    I was doing great, losing weight, working with a trainer, and definitely getting in better shape. Then, my daughter had medical issues that put her in the hospital for a week. I was still okay, but slowed down a little. Two months later, my wife was diagnosed with cancer. Then, my son-in-law was killed in a car crash. Lastly, my other daughter was diagnosed with breast cancer. During it all, I gained all the weight back. I've been back at it for 40 days. I'll get there again.

    Lord.....how could lightning strike so many times!?
    I am hoping you some semblance of normalcy and peace.
  • MHarper522
    MHarper522 Posts: 108 Member
    I lost about 75 pounds about 8 years ago...and then my life flipped completely. Moved to another country, couldn't work for a couple years waiting for all the immigration stuff. Was at home all the time, living with someone addicted to sweets. Got married, I'm very happy, and he doesn't care about my weight gain, which makes it easier to overlook. Had a baby...

    Gained it back and then some, but ready to be healthier for my little boy, my husband and myself.
  • HDBKLM
    HDBKLM Posts: 466 Member
    bump
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    I think that I didn't really make any mental changes. Losing weight was kind of a game for, watching the numbers drop gave me a thrill. So, when life got hard, I just didn't care enough to keep going.
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