How do you respond to dieting "confessionals"?

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Running_and_Coffee
Running_and_Coffee Posts: 811 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
"You look great!" from a friend often turns into, "Ugh, I need to do something myself....I <insert non-diet-friendly behavior here>." Such as, I ate a pizza for lunch, I have gained 10 lbs since I saw you last. I don't want to reply in a way that sounds like I am judgmental, some sort of diet expert or lying. Which means I'm not going to tell them they should or should not have not eaten the pizza, and I'm not going to offer a recipe for a cauliflower crust instead, and I'm also not going to say, "You don't look like you gained an ounce!"

What I usually do is try to change the subject. Like I might say, "Oh, you know me, always on a diet! So how are the kids?" But was just curious how other people respond as I am sure I'm not the only one getting these confessions!
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Replies

  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,742 Member
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    I just try to change the subject.
  • CarvedTones
    CarvedTones Posts: 2,340 Member
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    If they say "I need to make a change" or some variation of that, I say "If you do, you will really be glad you did". If all they do is berate themselves, it's much harder to think of anything to say.
  • Bekah7482
    Bekah7482 Posts: 247 Member
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    I usually say "You can do it!" and then change the subject. I hate when people want to talk diets and weight loss with me but I figure encouraging them and changing the subject means I acknowledged them and also made it so they get that I dont want to talk about weight loss with them.
  • LivingtheLeanDream
    LivingtheLeanDream Posts: 13,342 Member
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    My DIL says all the time she needs to lose weight (she does btw), but I know she doesn't want to hear advice from anyone... she's hoping like so many hope for a magic pill!

    After the nth time recently of her telling me she needed to 'cut back' I mentioned MFP and just counting cals, I just put that idea out there - perhaps she will try it but a person has to be willing to put in the effort to lose...
  • jefamer2017
    jefamer2017 Posts: 416 Member
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    LivingtheLeanDream wrote: »
    My DIL says all the time she needs to lose weight (she does btw), but I know she doesn't want to hear advice from anyone... she's hoping like so many hope for a magic pill!

    After the nth time recently of her telling me she needed to 'cut back' I mentioned MFP and just counting cals, I just put that idea out there - perhaps she will try it but a person has to be willing to put in the effort to lose...

    A friend of mine does this too. I say try myfitnesspal and get a food scale. She says it's too much work. I tell her you're always on the phone and in the kitchen so why not. She downloaded the app but has yet to use it. At least she took the first step.
  • jefamer2017
    jefamer2017 Posts: 416 Member
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    If people ask what I'm doing I tell them. If they just say they need to lose weight I tell them what I'm doing too. Of course most people that come up to me about my weight loss are friends family and coworkers who I am fairly close to so I don't worry about changing the subject. If they didn't want to hear about they'd tell me. I like talking about my weight loss though. I have motivated 2 of my sisters my mother and a few coworkers.
  • jefamer2017
    jefamer2017 Posts: 416 Member
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    amandaeve wrote: »
    I know a few women who can't get 5 words in without saying something hateful about their bodies and/or habits. If I'm feeling tired of hearing it (usually) I say, "Oh" or "Hm" and try to change the subject. If they keep on then I say something like, "Oh, I totally understand, I used to feel that way too. But then I decided to have some self compassion and now things are a lot better." They usually ignore me and keep on so then I say, "You know it's OK to be kind to yourself. How about we focus on what to do right now, or next time?" If they keep rambling after that, I usually have to remove myself from the conversation. Then in the back of my head I wonder if I used to be like that too? How did I get to know so many self-hating women? Is everyone like this? etc, etc.

    Question? Do you feel that if someone says that they are fat is negative speak. Because I have said that to people and they say no you're not. I was over 200lbs. I was FAT. I'm just curious because maybe I made people uncomfortable and now I kind of feel bad. Of course I'd only mention that I was fat when asked what I was doing after work and I'd tell them going home to work out because I am fat.
  • Cbean08
    Cbean08 Posts: 1,092 Member
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    I brush it off.

    If someone complains about how they just overate, I ask them if the food was good.
    If they complain about how they need to lose X lbs, I tell them it's a beautiful day for an outdoor activity.
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,426 Member
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    Just say okay and change the subject if it isn't something you want to get into.

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