How do you respond to dieting "confessionals"?
Replies
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I have a coworker who does this basically every day. At first I would offer for her to join me on my lunch walk, because it's beautiful outside and such a nice way to get moving in the middle of the day. She always has an excuse why she cant go, despite the fact that she just uses the time to play on her phone in the break room. When she mentions eating I usually just respond with something like "Ohhh yum I love pizza too, I try to limit it to once a month though because I could destroy a full pizza if given the chance!" because I feel like she assumes I only eat "clean" all the time, and that she would have to give up all of her favorite foods but that is not the case. It probably doesn't matter how respond though, they're most likely saying it for themselves, not for you, so nothing you say will make a difference (aside from potentially hurting feelings).4
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jefamer2017 wrote: »
A friend of mine does this too. I say try myfitnesspal and get a food scale. She says it's too much work. I tell her you're always on the phone and in the kitchen so why not. She downloaded the app but has yet to use it. At least she took the first step.
Savage hahaha!4 -
I am glad I found this thread. It makes me a little more aware of how I approach people when it comes to weight being brought up in conversation. I think I tend to be the one talking about what 'I' need to do. I have been here many times off and on. It is up to me to make sure I put in the work.4
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If they compliment you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable, make a joke. "Ugh! You make me feel so fat!" "I used to do that to myself all the time. I finally decided to do something about it." And then let the conversation go its natural way. If they want any particulars on how you lost the weight, share the basics and let it go. Let them lead the conversation. If they want to know more, they'll ask. They probably don't want to know more, and that's okay.1
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The ones that really give me pause are the ones who start out asking for advice (because I have lost over 60 pounds and kept it off a little while) and then interrupt me to tell me I am wrong about what works.11
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CarvedTones wrote: »The ones that really give me pause are the ones who start out asking for advice (because I have lost over 60 pounds and kept it off a little while) and then interrupt me to tell me I am wrong about what works.
Don't you love it when unhealthy people are dispensing advice on how to eat right? This totally reminds me of when my friends on FB were advising me that our pediatrician is treating our daughter's anemia in the wrong way, lol! I didn't say it, but I found myself thinking, "I didn't know you paired that History major with a minor in pediatric medicine."7 -
My husband says to say, "You're not losing weight because surprisingly bitching and whining don't burn that many calories."11
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I was just asked on Monday by two co-workers what I've been doing, that I look great. I said I've been eating less and moving more, waking up at 6am because I need to make time for me. That this is the only body I've been given and I need to feel comfortable. That MFP helps me keep on top of things. I feel like even hearing about change is overwhelming for people, and so they back away slowly. Or perhaps I sounded like Snoopy's teacher: Whomp-whomp-whomp.
I wanted to say that they should stop eating Starburst and Werthers and go out for a walk on our breaks instead of driving to McDonalds or eating Lean Cuisines. And walks with your dog every night is not enough.3 -
I'm usually honest with my friends... If you don't like that they say that every time, tell them. If they're actually curious or they never say stuff like that, tell them how you did it.1
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Well, my response depends on what the person says. If people ask what I've done, I say I've counted calories and started exercising. Where the conversation goes from there depends who I'm talking to and how they respond and how I read them.
Once, I gave detailed responses to specific questions because a person seemed genuinely interested in making improvements but didn't know where to start. Another time, I told someone they looked wonderful because they did. Another time, I told someone that exercise didn't have to be a chore and that it didn't necessarily mean "feeling the burn" the way Jane Fonda told us it had to back in the day. Most of the time, I make sympathetic noises and change the subject because people know what they need to do but were only looking for a magic pill and their face fell when they heard what I did.4 -
One of my coworkers just came over to my cube to say someone she knew ate oatmeal and lost weight so she was going to start eating oatmeal but she doesn’t like it. So then the others told her to add nuts, berries, milk, etc without mentioning calories.
Of course, no one asked the person who has lost 98 lbs so I kept my mouth shut.13 -
One of my coworkers just came over to my cube to say someone she knew ate oatmeal and lost weight so she was going to start eating oatmeal but she doesn’t like it. So then the others told her to add nuts, berries, milk, etc without mentioning calories.
Of course, no one asked the person who has lost 98 lbs so I kept my mouth shut.
I've noticed this in some groups, too - that group members will take weight loss advice from anyone except the one who's lost weight and kept it off (and they know it). It's kinda hilarious.5 -
One of my coworkers just came over to my cube to say someone she knew ate oatmeal and lost weight so she was going to start eating oatmeal but she doesn’t like it. So then the others told her to add nuts, berries, milk, etc without mentioning calories.
Of course, no one asked the person who has lost 98 lbs so I kept my mouth shut.
I've noticed this in some groups, too - that group members will take weight loss advice from anyone except the one who's lost weight and kept it off (and they know it). It's kinda hilarious.
Sometimes I am asked in that setting and when I say I log everything I eat, no exceptions, the feedback is almost always that it's too hard to do. I bite my tongue and don't say it's not hard to do for a few days just to get a sense for where you are at and the real problem is it is too revealing...7 -
CarvedTones wrote: »One of my coworkers just came over to my cube to say someone she knew ate oatmeal and lost weight so she was going to start eating oatmeal but she doesn’t like it. So then the others told her to add nuts, berries, milk, etc without mentioning calories.
Of course, no one asked the person who has lost 98 lbs so I kept my mouth shut.
I've noticed this in some groups, too - that group members will take weight loss advice from anyone except the one who's lost weight and kept it off (and they know it). It's kinda hilarious.
Sometimes I am asked in that setting and when I say I log everything I eat, no exceptions, the feedback is almost always that it's too hard to do. I bite my tongue and don't say it's not hard to do for a few days just to get a sense for where you are at and the real problem is it is too revealing...
I get that too. My phone is like a body part. It's always with me. Just like almost everyone else I know. Put the food on the scale open MFP log the food. It takes 2 seconds longer.3 -
jefamer2017 wrote: »CarvedTones wrote: »One of my coworkers just came over to my cube to say someone she knew ate oatmeal and lost weight so she was going to start eating oatmeal but she doesn’t like it. So then the others told her to add nuts, berries, milk, etc without mentioning calories.
Of course, no one asked the person who has lost 98 lbs so I kept my mouth shut.
I've noticed this in some groups, too - that group members will take weight loss advice from anyone except the one who's lost weight and kept it off (and they know it). It's kinda hilarious.
Sometimes I am asked in that setting and when I say I log everything I eat, no exceptions, the feedback is almost always that it's too hard to do. I bite my tongue and don't say it's not hard to do for a few days just to get a sense for where you are at and the real problem is it is too revealing...
I get that too. My phone is like a body part. It's always with me. Just like almost everyone else I know. Put the food on the scale open MFP log the food. It takes 2 seconds longer.
People don't want to admit that it's actually very simple to do! I hear all the time that it's too much work, they don't want to weigh foods, they don't want to look up entries on the app....i always tell them that most of us have our phones with us all the time and that after doing it for a weeks it becomes second nature.2
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