I can't control myself

nadiamartinez785 · July 2018

This is very embarrassing for me... But I need help I know no one can truly help me except for myself but advice is truly appreciated I have no idea what I am doing I have no motivation no inspiration no hope I can't even look at myself in the mirror I have let myself go I have never been a skinny person but this time I have really done it I'm 5-6 22 years old and weigh 280 pounds I feel like nothing I will ever do will ever change it I feel disgusting I'm so ashamed to even go walking outside my anxiety is so severe it's crippling I can't get my eating in control I feel sick and disgusting and I know people feel the same when they look at me I don't even know what to say anymore maybe someone will read this and give me a shot

kommodevaran · July 2018

To lose weight, you don't really need anything other than a calorie deficit (eat less, move more) and time. All that worry and self-shaming and hope is just noise that makes it harder to eat less (and move more).

007janculler · July 2018

Now that the problem is out in the open, start by recording the food you eat. I have the same amount of weight to lose as you. You have to break the goals down into smaller goals. You can do this, if you want to make a change. Good luck.

nadiamartinez785 · July 2018

That makes sense

nadiamartinez785 · July 2018

007janculler wrote: »

Now that the problem is out in the open, start by recording the food you eat. I have the same amount of weight to lose as you. You have to break the goals down into smaller goals. You can do this, if you want to make a change. Good luck.

Thank you it feels nice knowing I'm not the only one ..and that there is someone else out there in the world fighting the same battle what do you do to keep yourself going?

Nikki_Lee12 · July 2018

You got this! Being on here and recognizing the issue is a great first step! Take everyday one day at a time and just know that you are NOT disgusting.
This community is here for you as we are all here for similar reasons.

TavistockToad · July 2018

nadiamartinez785 wrote: »

This is very embarrassing for me... But I need help I know no one can truly help me except for myself but advice is truly appreciated I have no idea what I am doing I have no motivation no inspiration no hope I can't even look at myself in the mirror I have let myself go I have never been a skinny person but this time I have really done it I'm 5-6 22 years old and weigh 280 pounds I feel like nothing I will ever do will ever change it I feel disgusting I'm so ashamed to even go walking outside my anxiety is so severe it's crippling I can't get my eating in control I feel sick and disgusting and I know people feel the same when they look at me I don't even know what to say anymore maybe someone will read this and give me a shot

are you getting help for the anxiety?

i can guarantee the 98% of people looking at you don't see you, and are not thinking a single thing about you.

manderson27 · July 2018

There are hundreds of us on here. A lot of us have been where you are. Feeling disgusted about ourselves.

BUT and it's a big BUT. Hating yourself will not help anything.

Look at yourself as a work in progress not disgusting, not hopeless, just at a point in your life where you are going to take charge and change.

Go to the success stories forum and take a look at all the people who have lost weight sucessfully. You can read their stories, find out how they did it and take that information and apply it to yourself.

Count your calories, weigh and measure your food and log it honestly and keep to your calorie goal.

You will lose weight, be patient, don't get disheartened if it isn't as fast as you would like. Trust the process it will come off if you stick with it.

It definitely wont come off if you give up the first time you have a bad day.

This is a great place to find friends, tips, recipes and sound advice about nutrition and fitness.

Welcome to MFP

LiftHeavyThings27105 · July 2018

nadiamartinez785 wrote: »

This is very embarrassing for me... But I need help I know no one can truly help me except for myself but advice is truly appreciated I have no idea what I am doing I have no motivation no inspiration no hope I can't even look at myself in the mirror I have let myself go I have never been a skinny person but this time I have really done it I'm 5-6 22 years old and weigh 280 pounds I feel like nothing I will ever do will ever change it I feel disgusting I'm so ashamed to even go walking outside my anxiety is so severe it's crippling I can't get my eating in control I feel sick and disgusting and I know people feel the same when they look at me I don't even know what to say anymore maybe someone will read this and give me a shot

So, if I might....and I am saying this with love (no, don't know you....but know the feeling)….stop saying those ugly things about yourself. Start being kind to yourself. It will change everything for you.

I know that we are our own worst critic. I am king of that club. Well, used to be.

The mind (here I go, people!) is a super powerful thing....if you keep on telling yourself that you are - using your words against you here - sick and disgusting then you will eventually truly believe that. Then it is game over. Don't do that to yourself.

And, props to your courage for admitting that there is a problem. Putting yourself out there is a very scary thing. No worries. You are in good company. Lots and lots of people who can read your post and think to themselves...."been there, done that! So glad that those days are behind me!". You will get there. I do not doubt that for a second.

JaydedMiss · July 2018

i was the same, 5 ft 3 235 pounds and i had insane anxiety about going outside. The best advice i can give is dont complicate it. Eat well, Nourish your body no need to make any drastic changes just start small. Think like if you have a burger with mayo and all the toppings just remove the mayo and use ketchup. Just an example. Small changes at the begining will get the ball rolling and be relatively painless. Start by getting a food scale and learnign about the foods you eat and the better food choices follow. No need to overwhelm yourself. I lost my first 100 pounds without even exercising, I did walk though. Walking is less scary and simpler. Especially once weight loss has begun and you feel a bit more in charge because of it. Start small. Hell even end small. Every baby step/good decision gets you closer to where you want to be. Baby steps.

Weight loss doesnt need to be a huge drastic terrifying change. You dont need to change everything you eat, Or cut anything out forever, or live off salad. The only thing that matters is calories.

That said if your anxious and it sounds like you feel helpless and depressed aswell, I will say focusin on getting in my fruits and veggies and minor activity even just a small walk to get some sunshine does wonders. Even just the small changes i decide to do FOR ME slowly adds confidence and every pound i lost added confidence and i felt empowered vs powerless. Just take baby steps you can do it. And remember your human, You will struggle and eat things above your calories, I binged alot. But i focused on the baby steps. Taking 2 steps forward and 1 back still put me further towards my goal then away from it.

You ARE worth it. You can do it. You will do it. The way you talk about/to yourself is everything. I know its hard but just keep repeating it to yourself. You WILL do it. You ARE worth it. You got this.

TLRD: Baby steps. Just make the small changes and over time everything follows.

Kim_S_G · July 2018

manderson27 wrote: »

There are hundreds of us on here. A lot of us have been where you are. Feeling disgusted about ourselves.

BUT and it's a big BUT. Hating yourself will not help anything.

Look at yourself as a work in progress not disgusting, not hopeless, just at a point in your life where you are going to take charge and change.

Go to the success stories forum and take a look at all the people who have lost weight sucessfully. You can read their stories, find out how they did it and take that information and apply it to yourself.

Count your calories, weigh and measure your food and log it honestly and keep to your calorie goal.

You will lose weight, be patient, don't get disheartened if it isn't as fast as you would like. Trust the process it will come off if you stick with it.

It definitely wont come off if you give up the first time you have a bad day.

This is a great place to find friends, tips, recipes and sound advice about nutrition and fitness.

Welcome to MFP

I second this.

JenWoo77 · July 2018

I have about 70 lbs to lose. I'm a very upbeat person, very positve, bubbly, but hate how I look. I have no motivation to go to the gym when I need to. I just started the Ketogenic way of life and hoping I have the success as my co-workers did. It's hard. It's all a mental have. Put positive quotes up. Do exercises with cans of food or milk jugs full of water. You got this. You can do it.

nadiamartinez785 · July 2018

Thank you💜

nadiamartinez785 · July 2018

Wow thank you all ..for taking the time.. you truley made a difference 💘i will take all of your advice ..god bless

twinkit · July 2018

I started at 236 in January. Lost 25 pounds and then maintained for two months while walking 5 days 1 of those months and eating whatever. I started walking 10 minutes one way and 10 minutes back. 6 weeks later I can walk 40-50 minutes 5 days a week. It really motivated me to get my eating back on track. I am 210 now with a long way to go. Even did a cardio circuit class last week. So baby steps. 10 min one way 10 minutes back. Its about a mile. Also, I didn't shoot for 1200 calories a day in the beginning. I am still at 1400 and eating some exercise calories and losing now that both food and exercise are on target. I started at 1800 calories and just cut out alcohol in the beginning. Mechanics, consistency then intensity. Hit the bullseye by going for small changes. Good luck and best wishes.

bpotts44 · July 2018

See a professional about the anxiety. I suffer from anxiety as well and professional help was the solution. Next if you are struggling to control your eating, get all the junk food out of the house and commit to logging all your food.

Deviette · July 2018

Feel for you

The advice that everyone is giving here is amazing. And just something I'd like to add:
- Motivation doesn't make you lose weight
- Inspiration doesn't make you lose weight
- Hope doesn't make you lose weight
- Hating yourself doesn't make you lose weight
- A consistent calorie deficit makes you lose weight

As long as you consistently have a calorie deficit, then you will lose weight. You will have days when you hate yourself, days when you want to give up, days when you can't be bothered anymore.
It doesn't matter about all of that. As long as you have a calorie deficit, you will lose weight. No matter what, just keep logging. Feel like crap? Keep logging. Can't be bothered? Keep logging. Massively over ate and feel super guilty about it? Doesn't matter, log it!

The difference between people who try to diet and fail, and people who successfully lose weight and keep it off, is that when the initial motivation and initial feeling of happiness when the weight starts to go, wears off; they just keep going. Even if they don't want to, they just keep going.

Good luck, you can add me as a friend if you want

arbuckle57 · July 2018

sounds like me, at the beginning of the year i had 100 lbs to loose, iv lost 55 so far. I found out the calories my body should have by this site and try and eat with it. Iv cut sodas snacks and carbs. Instead i have bought a smaller plate to eat off, so my mind thinks its getting the same. I eat loads veg, no more meat a day than the palm of my hand. In the morning have porridge or eggs or something similar no more than 400 cals. No sugar, look out for sucrose, lactose cane sugar on items anything 'ose as its sugar disguised. I can't tell you how much i hated myself, hiding in long cardigans and tents. I was on meds as i was so low. Slowly you get you back. Don't worry if you have an eating frenzy one day, just start again the next day. We all do it. Basically never diet just eat properly. message if you want support i'll add you. We could support each other, two wanderers on our way to slimsville haha

ChubbyRose84 · July 2018

Hugz.

Eating enough protein and sauteed or roasted veggies can help. Especially the protein.

You don't have to workout in public, you can workout in private. There's tons of workout videos you can buy on Amazon. There's TONS of fitness channels on YouTube. Jessica Smith, Lucy Wyndham-Read, FitnessBlender, HASfit, etc.

ruffneckred · July 2018

Hi, great thread. I also suffer from social anxiety, just dread taking a walk, especially by myself. Just feel all the eyeballs, especially nosy neighbors watching and judging. I have found some relief in a website called 7cups, deals with mental health issues of all kinds. I get inspiration on MFP, when I see others liking my entry in log for the day, i guess I just don't want to disappoint them. Good luck, have a great day.

KonaKat · July 2018

You are your biggest enemy and I am not saying that to be nasty. The average person on the outside world is so wrapped up in their own problems that when they see you, it is a momentary registering for them. Our mind and what we believe plays a big role, more than what others do. Anyone losing weight will have challenges and those vary from person to person. Start by setting a goal of losing 5 pounds; don't look at the big picture as it can get overwhelming. Want to walk? Do it inside the house until you reach a comfort level for going outside. Each day is a new day. Just tell yourself that today I will eat less and walk in house. You can do it for one day, Then that one day's success leads to another day...and it is just a day in itself. Don't look at the time it will take to lose the weight. Focus upon one day at a time, exercise any way you can, and log your food....one day at a time.

I can't control myself

Replies

Categories