Single and Resentful
fastfoodietofitcutie
Posts: 523 Member
I love my family dearly but am feeling a little resentful today for having to shell out money again for a family occasion. I’m the oldest of four and unfortunately single. Over the years I have spent thousands on weddings, showers, bachelorette parties, baby showers, christening gifts, etc.. It’s not that I don’t want to celebrate their joyous occasions but I’m sad it will never be returned. In my mid 40’s, I’ll never have a baby and may never get married. It’s not that I’m keeping track of the money and want it back but it would be nice to be acknowledged that I’ve gone above and beyond over the years and have never been celebrated myself. I know that’s selfish. Just feeling sorry for myself today I guess as I’m on my way to celebrate another event that I’ll never have.
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Replies
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SIngle and resentful?
You wanna see true resentment.....
you should try being married.36 -
Just be happy: 1) you have a family you can share life with, many don't, and 2) you have the funds to it, again many don't.
Have a good day.15 -
Lots of hugs to you. It's ok to be a little selfish. Have you discussed your feelings with your family?0
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It makes sense to feel down about this and it's totally ok to acknowledge those feelings. Can you have a birthday bash or something that will bring the people you care about together to celebrate your day? Today I was reading Aliki's book "Feelings" with my kids and there's a boy generously sharing, and a boy with an angry look on his face a ways off hoarding his toys. The sharer says, "It feels good to give." And the recipient says, "It feels good to get." Those two kids are standing together and bonding. If you can, focus on how your sharing brings you closer together to your family and friends. You must be so loved to receive all those invitations. But I also think it's ok to say, "I can't afford to attend that destination wedding," and afford can mean "emotionally afford."8
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fastfoodietofitcutie wrote: »I love my family dearly but am feeling a little resentful today for having to shell out money again for a family occasion. I’m the oldest of four and unfortunately single. Over the years I have spent thousands on weddings, showers, bachelorette parties, baby showers, christening gifts, etc.. It’s not that I don’t want to celebrate their joyous occasions but I’m sad it will never be returned. In my mid 40’s, I’ll never have a baby and may never get married. It’s not that I’m keeping track of the money and want it back but it would be nice to be acknowledged that I’ve gone above and beyond over the years and have never been celebrated myself. I know that’s selfish. Just feeling sorry for myself today I guess as I’m on my way to celebrate another event that I’ll never have.
Throw yourself a lavish birthday party. Ball gown, banquet hall, fancy invites. They will celebrate you and gift you things as well.5 -
Motorsheen wrote: »SIngle and resentful?
You wanna see true resentment.....
you should try being married.
1 -
I have never thought about this aspect.
Coupla things:
Don’t buy your nieces and nephews birthday or Xmas gifts (if you do this already), your siblings will thank you. Trust me
Second, i can’t tell if this is about the money or if it’s just a reminder that you’re single and feel lonely but I just want to say that ‘having someone’ can be desperately lonely too. Marriage is not all it’s cracked up to be. Kids are generally jerks and any parent who says differently probably never actually spends time with their kids 😅. I’m currently engaged in a Mexican standoff with my husband over the dirty dishes and even though it’s been a few days, he still doesn’t even know that I’ve waged battle. I can’t remember the last time we had an engaging conversation. My son is a budding bully and I have to work with him constantly on empathy. My daughter is a martyr and an eternal victim and she’s only 7. Her favorite activity is throwing a tantrum. I spend most days irritable and resentful that I had kids ‘because that’s just what you do’. I know some day they’ll outgrow this but my daily mother’s guilt level is somewhere between self-loathing and a low-grade level of black despair.
Now. Several people might quote this and say “I love my marriage and kids” and that’s great. I’m glad. But the silent majority get it, although most of them are wise enough not to put it out so flatly like this. 😬
So I guess I’m saying.. the grass is always greener. You envy us. We envy you. But I can tell you that no amount of gifts I received for babies or showers or my wedding even come close to making up for what are decidedly my biggest regrets and the loss of my freedom.
Disclaimer: I love my kids. I do not regret their existence. But I truly hate being a parent and it’s something I need to work out so they never feel as though I resent them. *Edit* This is getting better as they get older, so there’s hope
Most important thing though: I have no intention of invalidating your feelings. I don’t mean to imply that you shouldn’t feel upset because others have it worse. I’m just trying to share the real life aspects of what you feel you’re missing out on.
This is my longest post ever.
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😂0 -
caco_ethes wrote: »I have never thought about this aspect.
Coupla things:
Don’t buy your nieces and nephews birthday or Xmas gifts (if you do this already), your siblings will thank you....
Regarding your whole post, I think you have a good point about the grass is always greener. Additionally, you never know what’s going on behind closed doors but as far as I can tell everyone is very happy in their family units. Not that I don’t want them to be happy, it just makes my envy even worse.
I do have those days or weekends that I am thankful for being able to do what I want but in my mind it doesn’t make up for not having a partner in life.
I hope your situation gets better!1 -
Being single is definitely hard and marriage is hard as well. I have a couple of single friends and I notice that yes sometimes they are lonely but they go out with their girlfriends, get mani's and pedi's, they shop and take care of themselves. If I were you, I would find some friends that you could hang out with, that have the same interests as you and the same situation. It is hard being around married people, when you are single. I would take a trip and do things for yourself, like traveling to a place you have never been before. I would not go all out for every event for the family. I give my nephews practical gifts and I give to them at all times of the year. I hope you can find comfort soon and/or find someone to love.0
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caco_ethes wrote: »I have never thought about this aspect.
Coupla things:
Don’t buy your nieces and nephews birthday or Xmas gifts (if you do this already), your siblings will thank you. Trust me
Second, i can’t tell if this is about the money or if it’s just a reminder that you’re single and feel lonely but I just want to say that ‘having someone’ can be desperately lonely too. Marriage is not all it’s cracked up to be. Kids are generally jerks and any parent who says differently probably never actually spends time with their kids 😅. I’m currently engaged in a Mexican standoff with my husband over the dirty dishes and even though it’s been a few days, he still doesn’t even know that I’ve waged battle. I can’t remember the last time we had an engaging conversation. My son is a budding bully and I have to work with him constantly on empathy. My daughter is a martyr and an eternal victim and she’s only 7. Her favorite activity is throwing a tantrum. I spend most days irritable and resentful that I had kids ‘because that’s just what you do’. I know some day they’ll outgrow this but my daily mother’s guilt level is somewhere between self-loathing and a low-grade level of black despair.
Now. Several people might quote this and say “I love my marriage and kids” and that’s great. I’m glad. But the silent majority get it, although most of them are wise enough not to put it out so flatly like this. 😬
So I guess I’m saying.. the grass is always greener. You envy us. We envy you. But I can tell you that no amount of gifts I received for babies or showers or my wedding even come close to making up for what are decidedly my biggest regrets and the loss of my freedom.
Disclaimer: I love my kids. I do not regret their existence. But I truly hate being a parent and it’s something I need to work out so they never feel as though I resent them. *Edit* This is getting better as they get older, so there’s hope
Most important thing though: I have no intention of invalidating your feelings. I don’t mean to imply that you shouldn’t feel upset because others have it worse. I’m just trying to share the real life aspects of what you feel you’re missing out on.
This is my longest post ever.
I'll be thinking about this when I go swimming today.2 -
I promise you... that grass isn't any greener. It's just different grass.6
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This post actually reminds me of an episode of Sex and the City. Sorry that you feel that way. I second the opinion that you should throw yourself a fantastic birthday party. Gift registry and all.1
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caco_ethes wrote: »I have never thought about this aspect.
Coupla things:
Don’t buy your nieces and nephews birthday or Xmas gifts (if you do this already), your siblings will thank you. Trust me
Second, i can’t tell if this is about the money or if it’s just a reminder that you’re single and feel lonely but I just want to say that ‘having someone’ can be desperately lonely too. Marriage is not all it’s cracked up to be. Kids are generally jerks and any parent who says differently probably never actually spends time with their kids 😅. I’m currently engaged in a Mexican standoff with my husband over the dirty dishes and even though it’s been a few days, he still doesn’t even know that I’ve waged battle. I can’t remember the last time we had an engaging conversation. My son is a budding bully and I have to work with him constantly on empathy. My daughter is a martyr and an eternal victim and she’s only 7. Her favorite activity is throwing a tantrum. I spend most days irritable and resentful that I had kids ‘because that’s just what you do’. I know some day they’ll outgrow this but my daily mother’s guilt level is somewhere between self-loathing and a low-grade level of black despair.
Now. Several people might quote this and say “I love my marriage and kids” and that’s great. I’m glad. But the silent majority get it, although most of them are wise enough not to put it out so flatly like this. 😬
So I guess I’m saying.. the grass is always greener. You envy us. We envy you. But I can tell you that no amount of gifts I received for babies or showers or my wedding even come close to making up for what are decidedly my biggest regrets and the loss of my freedom.
Disclaimer: I love my kids. I do not regret their existence. But I truly hate being a parent and it’s something I need to work out so they never feel as though I resent them. *Edit* This is getting better as they get older, so there’s hope
Most important thing though: I have no intention of invalidating your feelings. I don’t mean to imply that you shouldn’t feel upset because others have it worse. I’m just trying to share the real life aspects of what you feel you’re missing out on.
This is my longest post ever.
I can relate to alot of this some days. No judgement here!1 -
Motorsheen wrote: »SIngle and resentful?
You wanna see true resentment.....
you should try being married.
I'm editing this post to recant my previous statement
0 -
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Motorsheen wrote: »SIngle and resentful?
You wanna see true resentment.....
you should try being married.
W3rd G.3 -
fastfoodietofitcutie wrote: »
I don't doubt it, but...I promise you... that grass isn't any greener. It's just different grass.
I would also wonder if you're projecting a bit. Is "everyone" *really* pitying you? And if so, are they pitying you because they think you're missing out on something fantastically wonderful, or because they know you want a family of your own?4 -
fastfoodietofitcutie wrote: »Being 45 and single at every function and have everyone pity you takes its toll.
Like you should care at 45? That is right in the "not caring what other people think" age wheel house. Wait till 50. Then all the pity, insults, and judegement gets really funny.
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Chael2dot0 wrote: »fastfoodietofitcutie wrote: »Being 45 and single at every function and have everyone pity you takes its toll.
Like you should care at 45? That is right in the "not caring what other people think" age wheel house. Wait till 50. Then all the pity, insults, and judegement gets really funny.
Great, something to look forward to!1 -
I'm also 45 and single! I get bummed about it sometimes (like when my dad keeps implying I'm a lesbian, and not in a supportive way) but I'd rather be single than be with someone I don't love, and I just haven't met him yet.
It also helps me to remember that not too long ago, women weren't allowed to be single and active in the world. Jane Austen's characters would have given their right arms to be able to stay single and get jobs without being considered "ruined."
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fastfoodietofitcutie wrote: »I love my family dearly but am feeling a little resentful today for having to shell out money again for a family occasion. I’m the oldest of four and unfortunately single. Over the years I have spent thousands on weddings, showers, bachelorette parties, baby showers, christening gifts, etc.. It’s not that I don’t want to celebrate their joyous occasions but I’m sad it will never be returned. In my mid 40’s, I’ll never have a baby and may never get married. It’s not that I’m keeping track of the money and want it back but it would be nice to be acknowledged that I’ve gone above and beyond over the years and have never been celebrated myself. I know that’s selfish. Just feeling sorry for myself today I guess as I’m on my way to celebrate another event that I’ll never have.
Yeah, lots I'd probably disagree with here.
Try being married, if you want to learn about money going away that you'll never get back. Try having kids, for that matter.
I know you said you don't want the money back, but if you don't want to spend it, then don't spend it. You can either be the family member who doesn't shell out for occasions, or you can be the one who does. This is everyone's choice. EVERYONE buys into this, at least in my family, so it's just kind of expected.
As far as not getting anything on your return, you get your family and sharing those fun times together. If you don't want to participate in it, you don't have to.
"If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice."7 -
sex and the city covered this...send out a I AM MARRYING MYSELF w a registry. worked for carrie.1
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caco_ethes wrote: »I have never thought about this aspect.
Coupla things:
Don’t buy your nieces and nephews birthday or Xmas gifts (if you do this already), your siblings will thank you. Trust me
Second, i can’t tell if this is about the money or if it’s just a reminder that you’re single and feel lonely but I just want to say that ‘having someone’ can be desperately lonely too. Marriage is not all it’s cracked up to be. Kids are generally jerks and any parent who says differently probably never actually spends time with their kids 😅. I’m currently engaged in a Mexican standoff with my husband over the dirty dishes and even though it’s been a few days, he still doesn’t even know that I’ve waged battle. I can’t remember the last time we had an engaging conversation. My son is a budding bully and I have to work with him constantly on empathy. My daughter is a martyr and an eternal victim and she’s only 7. Her favorite activity is throwing a tantrum. I spend most days irritable and resentful that I had kids ‘because that’s just what you do’. I know some day they’ll outgrow this but my daily mother’s guilt level is somewhere between self-loathing and a low-grade level of black despair.
Now. Several people might quote this and say “I love my marriage and kids” and that’s great. I’m glad. But the silent majority get it, although most of them are wise enough not to put it out so flatly like this. 😬
So I guess I’m saying.. the grass is always greener. You envy us. We envy you. But I can tell you that no amount of gifts I received for babies or showers or my wedding even come close to making up for what are decidedly my biggest regrets and the loss of my freedom.
Disclaimer: I love my kids. I do not regret their existence. But I truly hate being a parent and it’s something I need to work out so they never feel as though I resent them. *Edit* This is getting better as they get older, so there’s hope
Most important thing though: I have no intention of invalidating your feelings. I don’t mean to imply that you shouldn’t feel upset because others have it worse. I’m just trying to share the real life aspects of what you feel you’re missing out on.
This is my longest post ever.
Wow, to use a really inappropriate expression, that was HOT. Like, caco genuinely nailed an awful lot of being a parent and a spouse on the day-to-day.
I think my wife and I get along incredibly well. INCREDIBLY. AND I think we are different than many, many couples. We still have *kitten* awful fights, times where we don't speak to each other, long periods of non-coitus, serious doubt and confusion, etc. AND I THINK WE'RE TOTALLY EXCEPTIONAL! Even happier or more functional than many other couples. And, yet, we aren't really anything special at all, as far as marriage goes.
Caco, your description of your children and how they feel and how you know it will pass but still... those sentiments were on the money. Mine are 3.5 and approx. 1, so they aren't as dramatically developed as yours are, but we can still see the subtle beginnings of megalomaniac and father-hater.
Anyway, just had to chime on on how real this was.
Also, the advice about not getting presents for the nieces and nephews, at least not any more goddamn toys or coloring books, that is solid advice right there.
As for longest post ever: post on!
6 -
JustinAnimal wrote: »caco_ethes wrote: »I have never thought about this aspect.
Coupla things:
Don’t buy your nieces and nephews birthday or Xmas gifts (if you do this already), your siblings will thank you. Trust me
Second, i can’t tell if this is about the money or if it’s just a reminder that you’re single and feel lonely but I just want to say that ‘having someone’ can be desperately lonely too. Marriage is not all it’s cracked up to be. Kids are generally jerks and any parent who says differently probably never actually spends time with their kids 😅. I’m currently engaged in a Mexican standoff with my husband over the dirty dishes and even though it’s been a few days, he still doesn’t even know that I’ve waged battle. I can’t remember the last time we had an engaging conversation. My son is a budding bully and I have to work with him constantly on empathy. My daughter is a martyr and an eternal victim and she’s only 7. Her favorite activity is throwing a tantrum. I spend most days irritable and resentful that I had kids ‘because that’s just what you do’. I know some day they’ll outgrow this but my daily mother’s guilt level is somewhere between self-loathing and a low-grade level of black despair.
Now. Several people might quote this and say “I love my marriage and kids” and that’s great. I’m glad. But the silent majority get it, although most of them are wise enough not to put it out so flatly like this. 😬
So I guess I’m saying.. the grass is always greener. You envy us. We envy you. But I can tell you that no amount of gifts I received for babies or showers or my wedding even come close to making up for what are decidedly my biggest regrets and the loss of my freedom.
Disclaimer: I love my kids. I do not regret their existence. But I truly hate being a parent and it’s something I need to work out so they never feel as though I resent them. *Edit* This is getting better as they get older, so there’s hope
Most important thing though: I have no intention of invalidating your feelings. I don’t mean to imply that you shouldn’t feel upset because others have it worse. I’m just trying to share the real life aspects of what you feel you’re missing out on.
This is my longest post ever.
Wow, to use a really inappropriate expression, that was HOT. Like, caco genuinely nailed an awful lot of being a parent and a spouse on the day-to-day.
I think my wife and I get along incredibly well. INCREDIBLY. AND I think we are different than many, many couples. We still have *kitten* awful fights, times where we don't speak to each other, long periods of non-coitus, serious doubt and confusion, etc. AND I THINK WE'RE TOTALLY EXCEPTIONAL! Even happier or more functional than many other couples. And, yet, we aren't really anything special at all, as far as marriage goes.
Caco, your description of your children and how they feel and how you know it will pass but still... those sentiments were on the money. Mine are 3.5 and approx. 1, so they aren't as dramatically developed as yours are, but we can still see the subtle beginnings of megalomaniac and father-hater.
Anyway, just had to chime on on how real this was.
Also, the advice about not getting presents for the nieces and nephews, at least not any more goddamn toys or coloring books, that is solid advice right there.
As for longest post ever: post on!
Gtfoutta here with your good marriage 😅😉0 -
caco_ethes wrote: »I have never thought about this aspect.
Coupla things:
Don’t buy your nieces and nephews birthday or Xmas gifts (if you do this already), your siblings will thank you. Trust me
Second, i can’t tell if this is about the money or if it’s just a reminder that you’re single and feel lonely but I just want to say that ‘having someone’ can be desperately lonely too. Marriage is not all it’s cracked up to be. Kids are generally jerks and any parent who says differently probably never actually spends time with their kids 😅. I’m currently engaged in a Mexican standoff with my husband over the dirty dishes and even though it’s been a few days, he still doesn’t even know that I’ve waged battle. I can’t remember the last time we had an engaging conversation. My son is a budding bully and I have to work with him constantly on empathy. My daughter is a martyr and an eternal victim and she’s only 7. Her favorite activity is throwing a tantrum. I spend most days irritable and resentful that I had kids ‘because that’s just what you do’. I know some day they’ll outgrow this but my daily mother’s guilt level is somewhere between self-loathing and a low-grade level of black despair.
Now. Several people might quote this and say “I love my marriage and kids” and that’s great. I’m glad. But the silent majority get it, although most of them are wise enough not to put it out so flatly like this. 😬
So I guess I’m saying.. the grass is always greener. You envy us. We envy you. But I can tell you that no amount of gifts I received for babies or showers or my wedding even come close to making up for what are decidedly my biggest regrets and the loss of my freedom.
Disclaimer: I love my kids. I do not regret their existence. But I truly hate being a parent and it’s something I need to work out so they never feel as though I resent them. *Edit* This is getting better as they get older, so there’s hope
Most important thing though: I have no intention of invalidating your feelings. I don’t mean to imply that you shouldn’t feel upset because others have it worse. I’m just trying to share the real life aspects of what you feel you’re missing out on.
This is my longest post ever.
Let's have kids we said. It will be fun we said! **FACEPAML!!**
I totally agree. Being in a marriage where every decision has to be shared, having a family where self-sacrifice is a requirement, dealing with all the non-sense on a daily basis and it seems like a never ending nightmare. Love my kids to pieces but I miss soooooooo much having the freedom. I am always cleaning up messes, being yelled at, managing tantrums, giving discipline. I think to myself, I used to be fun before I had kids!!!!
I practically never do anything for myself and when I do I can barely enjoy it as the guilt comes knocking right away. I feel so isolated, it's not even funny. I am thankful for my husband which I love and I know he truly loves me, but sometimes I just wish for something else. Just being alone. Just being involved with my girlfriends who understood me and actually doing things I enjoy. They both (yes, I only had two girl friends) kind of drifted away as I am really devoted to my family. I just hope my kids one day realize everything I do for them and don't forget about me once they leave the house.
My husband doesn't want to fake interest in the things I love and I feel like I am the only one taking interest in what he likes, otherwise, we never really would spend time together. Apart from loving each other, sometimes I wonder what we have in common (well I guess values and our kids... but that gets boring). As for the kids, I liked spending time with kids more when they weren't mine. How ironic!
I miss being able to sleep. Not being responsible of everyone and everything. Doing things I enjoy and spending time with the people I want just because it's fun, not because it's appropriate. Having a fit body that isn't marked by stretch marks all across. Having a body that doesn't ache so much I can barely do anything. Used to be so fit and in shape and now I'm just a serial dieter and after 3 kids I just can't seem to lose the damn weight.
Oh well, I count my blessings, tell myself it's a season of life. Bottom line, it's the life I chose so no point in regretting it. Just have to make the most out of it. I also think my husband and I are a pretty good couple, but it's not all I thought it would be for sure.
And I totally agree with the gifts things. I had to impose a limit of one gift by family member, and even then I would often rather they don't give anything because it gets so overwhelming, and honestly the more things the kids have the less they enjoy or care fot it.
I often look at those single 30 something living the life, and I think to myself... It would be fun. Maybe at the very end of my life I'll appreciate having all of these people I invested so much time in be there by my side (if they even are) but I feel like I will regret a bunch of stuff I wish I could do but there is always something (whether the lack of time or resources, or the freedom) that keeps me from being able to do.
Even though my husband has I think the same outlook (it's the life I chose so no point in regretting it. Just have to make the most out of it) I think he probably thinks the same thing! The only comfort we have is that we can lean on each other in hard times, and that we suffer together lol.
Same thing applies to you honey, no point in regretting the life you chose, just make the most out of it. Also, you never know when love will come knocking, it's never too late. So just enjoy the ride because it will be over before you know it. oxoxox3 -
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caco_ethes wrote: »I have never thought about this aspect.
Coupla things:
Don’t buy your nieces and nephews birthday or Xmas gifts (if you do this already), your siblings will thank you. Trust me
Second, i can’t tell if this is about the money or if it’s just a reminder that you’re single and feel lonely but I just want to say that ‘having someone’ can be desperately lonely too. Marriage is not all it’s cracked up to be. Kids are generally jerks and any parent who says differently probably never actually spends time with their kids 😅. I’m currently engaged in a Mexican standoff with my husband over the dirty dishes and even though it’s been a few days, he still doesn’t even know that I’ve waged battle. I can’t remember the last time we had an engaging conversation. My son is a budding bully and I have to work with him constantly on empathy. My daughter is a martyr and an eternal victim and she’s only 7. Her favorite activity is throwing a tantrum. I spend most days irritable and resentful that I had kids ‘because that’s just what you do’. I know some day they’ll outgrow this but my daily mother’s guilt level is somewhere between self-loathing and a low-grade level of black despair.
Now. Several people might quote this and say “I love my marriage and kids” and that’s great. I’m glad. But the silent majority get it, although most of them are wise enough not to put it out so flatly like this. 😬
So I guess I’m saying.. the grass is always greener. You envy us. We envy you. But I can tell you that no amount of gifts I received for babies or showers or my wedding even come close to making up for what are decidedly my biggest regrets and the loss of my freedom.
Disclaimer: I love my kids. I do not regret their existence. But I truly hate being a parent and it’s something I need to work out so they never feel as though I resent them. *Edit* This is getting better as they get older, so there’s hope
Most important thing though: I have no intention of invalidating your feelings. I don’t mean to imply that you shouldn’t feel upset because others have it worse. I’m just trying to share the real life aspects of what you feel you’re missing out on.
This is my longest post ever.
Let's have kids we said. It will be fun we said! **FACEPAML!!**
I totally agree. Being in a marriage where every decision has to be shared, having a family where self-sacrifice is a requirement, dealing with all the non-sense on a daily basis and it seems like a never ending nightmare. Love my kids to pieces but I miss soooooooo much having the freedom. I am always cleaning up messes, being yelled at, managing tantrums, giving discipline. I think to myself, I used to be fun before I had kids!!!!
I practically never do anything for myself and when I do I can barely enjoy it as the guilt comes knocking right away. I feel so isolated, it's not even funny. I am thankful for my husband which I love and I know he truly loves me, but sometimes I just wish for something else. Just being alone. Just being involved with my girlfriends who understood me and actually doing things I enjoy. They both (yes, I only had two girl friends) kind of drifted away as I am really devoted to my family. I just hope my kids one day realize everything I do for them and don't forget about me once they leave the house.
My husband doesn't want to fake interest in the things I love and I feel like I am the only one taking interest in what he likes, otherwise, we never really would spend time together. Apart from loving each other, sometimes I wonder what we have in common (well I guess values and our kids... but that gets boring). As for the kids, I liked spending time with kids more when they weren't mine. How ironic!
I miss being able to sleep. Not being responsible of everyone and everything. Doing things I enjoy and spending time with the people I want just because it's fun, not because it's appropriate. Having a fit body that isn't marked by stretch marks all across. Having a body that doesn't ache so much I can barely do anything. Used to be so fit and in shape and now I'm just a serial dieter and after 3 kids I just can't seem to lose the damn weight.
Oh well, I count my blessings, tell myself it's a season of life. Bottom line, it's the life I chose so no point in regretting it. Just have to make the most out of it. I also think my husband and I are a pretty good couple, but it's not all I thought it would be for sure.
And I totally agree with the gifts things. I had to impose a limit of one gift by family member, and even then I would often rather they don't give anything because it gets so overwhelming, and honestly the more things the kids have the less they enjoy or care fot it.
I often look at those single 30 something living the life, and I think to myself... It would be fun. Maybe at the very end of my life I'll appreciate having all of these people I invested so much time in be there by my side (if they even are) but I feel like I will regret a bunch of stuff I wish I could do but there is always something (whether the lack of time or resources, or the freedom) that keeps me from being able to do.
Even though my husband has I think the same outlook (it's the life I chose so no point in regretting it. Just have to make the most out of it) I think he probably thinks the same thing! The only comfort we have is that we can lean on each other in hard times, and that we suffer together lol.
Same thing applies to you honey, no point in regretting the life you chose, just make the most out of it. Also, you never know when love will come knocking, it's never too late. So just enjoy the ride because it will be over before you know it. oxoxox
Yes, you never think of any of the frustrations. You make a very valid point and I’m really going to focus on what I do have.0 -
Single is the good life.
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