I feel like I’ve screwed up and I’m so tempted to quit.
ashley399
Posts: 3 Member
I was super motivated last week, the scale moved every day, I was cooking healthy meals and doing great. But the scale hasn’t moved down for 3 days and life happened so I haven’t been able to cook. I have twin toddlers and I get so busy taking care of them and the house that cooking seems impossible. They would take a late nap and that would ensure that I couldn’t cook, so I would do take out. Tonight, same story. They napped late. So we did take out. And I ate 2 stupid cookies and 2 pieces of chocolate and even drank some of my husbands coke 😭. My immediate thought was that there is no point in trying to lose weight because it seems impossible.
How do y’all handle it when life happens and there is no time to take an hour for food to cook?? How do you handle the sweet cravings??
How do y’all handle it when life happens and there is no time to take an hour for food to cook?? How do you handle the sweet cravings??
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Replies
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So take out usually is high in sodium so you not losing could be because of water retention.
I don't think I know what a craving is. When I have a hankering for a sweet I usually have it and make sure it fits in my days calorie allotment.
I eat out often so I just try to plan for it to make sure that I can fit everything in my day.
You don't fail if you don't give up. Just move on from today and try to make better choices tomorrow. We all have bad days, just don't turn them into bad weeks, months or years and most importantly don't give up!6 -
Is it better to give up and eat unhealthy or try your best, eat well mostly, and have a cheat every once in a while?
You cannot be expected to be perfect every. single. day. It is impossible and unrealistic and its a goal you are setting for yourself that you will never meet and in return be disappointed and like you can see want to give up. Don't be too harsh on yourself. Continue to do your best and know that you can have a cheat now and again. I know what its like to be trying to be healthy and have kids. My daughter is 2. I cant imagine having twins and juggling your health along with everything else. I can barely juggle all of it with one 2 year old. lol. YOU CAN DO IT! Even if you eat out every once in a while.4 -
Hi Ashley. Deep breaths
You are fine. Really.
A couple of thoughts. The scale just isn't going to move every day. That's just not how the human body works, especially female human bodies with those wonderful monthly cycles. But rest assured, if you are in a consistent calorie deficit, your body is burning fat whether the number on the scale goes down, stays the same, or even temporarily goes up. It takes many weeks to see your real progress.
My kids are older, but I refuse to spend a lot of time on meal prep. Can you throw some meat or chicken or soup ingredients in a crockpot earlier in the day? I love big-batch soups or skillet dishes that can be thrown together easily and last a few days. Tonight, I spent 15 minutes making pizza- pre-made thin crusts, sauce, some chopped ham & a few veggies, & cheese. It was 120 calories a slice (no kidding) and it was delicious Eggs are quick & easy, or maybe an omelet with a few veggies. The kids love burger & smoothie night. Just throw some skim milk, Greek yogurt, spinach, & frozen strawberries in a blender. Very quick & easy. Just keep it simple. And don't be afraid of take-out, but maybe view it as an element of the meal. Pair a burger or a couple of slices of pizza with some fresh fruits & veggies. You don't have to eat any special foods or fussy meals to lose weight, just keep it within your calorie goal.
And speaking of calorie goals, as a young mother, be kind to yourself and don't choose an overly-aggressive goal. A pound a week will get you there and with enough calories to keep you from going crazy or discouraged & giving up. You can do this13 -
How do y’all handle it when life happens and there is no time to take an hour for food to cook?? How do you handle the sweet cravings??
My husband cooks, and we use frozen stuff so that he doesn't have to take an hour for food to cook.
Frozen veg, a low cal soup like La Zuppa, 90 second brown rice and a couple tins of shredded chicken ... toss it all in together, and you've got dinner in about 5 minutes.
Spend some time in a grocery store if you can and see what's available ... or do what I'm about to do and shop for groceries online. Browse. There are lots of decent options out there.
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BTW, many have the mistaken impression that to lose weight, they have to eat "clean" or completely overhaul their diet. Absolutely not true. While a balanced diet is better for our health and will generally help us meet our calorie goals more easily, once we've gotten enough nutrition for the day, there's no extra credit for more broccoli. Eat your cookies and your chocolate if you have room for it in your calorie allowance (though if a particular food is a trigger for you, you may be better off not keeping it in the house).9
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Hi, feel free to add, I have a 16 month old and a 7 month old. I've done this so many times and always given up, because my mind wasn't in it, but this time is different I'm sort of able to fight the cravings. When my belly starts to rumble and just drink a pint of water or squash and it seems to help. If I'm desperately craving sugar I have a fizzy can with no added sugar usually Fanta which is 10 calories (full of crap but keeps me under my calories). After dinner if I have calories left over I have some chocolate but won't if I don't have enough.0
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Make small changes you can sustain for a lifetime. For me, it's all about balance - eat the chocolate and go for a walk or have veggie soup the next day. Too restrictive eating can lead to failure and binges. This is a slow process....a journey. You did not gain your weight in a week so be patient with yourself. It's what we do consistently over the long haul that gets results.
Sending you some positive mojo!! 🤩3 -
Deep Breath - don't be so hard on yourself.
Weight loss takes TIME. it is a slow process. you don't loose all the weight in a month when it took you years to put it on.
Weight is not a static number. your weight varies based on time of day, how much water you happen to be retaining, time of the month...lots of factors. so the number on the scale at ANY given day, is just data. it doesn't mean anything. some days i am up 2lbs but that is not a sign i put on two pounds, just a random quirk based on water retention and well lots of other things. Look at trends. Maybe get a trending app (I use Happy Scale). Consider weighing yourself at the same time of day once a week. and take the number with a grain of salt - it's only data.
Eating healthy won't necessarily have you loose weight. for some depending on how they eat it MIGHT. but to loose weight you need to eat at a calorie deficit. and i'll be honest, some clean and health recipes are high cal (for me). So put in your stats into MFP and eat foods you like and keep you full that hit that calorie goal.
lastly - maybe start with a plan. you are strapped for time, understandable with kiddos. Have a plan for smart choices at your regular take out that fit your calorie goal, and hvae some ready to eat quick go to's at home. Ex: frozen veggies, prepared protein (either purchased or cook a huge batch of chicken on the weekend and freeze so it's "ready to go"). Hungry girl has many quick ideas for meal prep to have on hand. Other ideas are eggs (cooked, boiled), tuna cans...2 -
funjen1972 wrote: »For me, it's all about balance - eat the chocolate and go for a walk or have veggie soup the next day.
I like your advice in general, but would advise against this idea of having to "make up" for something we enjoy. There's nothing wrong with chocolate or any other food- if we have room for it in our day, we should enjoy it and not give it a second thought.3 -
funjen1972 wrote: »For me, it's all about balance - eat the chocolate and go for a walk or have veggie soup the next day.
I like your advice in general, but would advise against this idea of having to "make up" for something we enjoy. There's nothing wrong with chocolate or any other food- if we have room for it in our day, we should enjoy it and not give it a second thought.
agreed.
I eat chocolate DAILY. often 2x a day. i don't feel guilty. i successfully lost the weight.2 -
I ate pizza, chocolate, fast food, cookies etc while losing weight. Obviously that's not all I ate, I ate lots of stereotypically "healthy" food too. But if you needed to be perfect to lose weight, no one would ever lose weight. The difference between people who succeed and people who don't, is the people who succeed know that real life happens and they will go off plan and that it's no big deal - as long as they don't quit.
Log your food accurately and consistently. Every day, the good and the bad. The veggies and the cookies and the late night snacks. Hit your calorie goal. Fit in foods you like. Learn from your mistakes. Check out these threads when you get a chance:
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1080242/a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants/p1
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/818701/the-myth-of-motivation-and-what-you-need-instead/p1
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10610953/neat-improvement-strategies-to-improve-weight-loss/p1
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10636388/free-customized-personal-weight-loss-eating-plan-not-spam-or-mlm/p14 -
You only see those daily quick weight drops early on as you are losing a lot of water weight...it doesn't continue like that, it evens out to a normal rate of loss...which is slow. So first things first...realistic expectations...understand that this is a slow, long process and embrace the process...buckle up for the long haul.3
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There's a lot of advice about the scale so I won't chime in because everyone pretty much covered it lol but I noticed you were beating yourself up about having some unhealthy food, listen to your cravings when you get them because when we push ourselves away from food we crave, our bodys want it more! Eat healthy but don't be too strict, for it to be a lifestyle change and not just a diet we need to be happy and eat some unhealthy foods in moderation as long as you get back into eating healthy again.3
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Give yourself a break. There’s a fairly long learning curve in this that rarely gets mentioned.4
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I am a mom to one toddler. I can't imagine having twins.
As others have said, don't beat yourself up and you can still lose weight eating those kinds of foods, just in moderation.
A few things which may already have been said. The scale will fluctuate. You won't see loss every day. Some days you may even see a gain. This could be from water retention due to eating for sodium or starting a new exercise routine, your period, eating more than usual, and so many other things. Stick with it and you will see results over the longer term.
Based on your post it sounds like you try to cook dinner every night. That sounds exhausting and difficult with twin toddlers. My husband and I both work full time (relevant for schedule described below). We typically plan 2-3 dinners per week and eat leftovers the rest of the time . Whichever dinner takes the most time and/or effort to make gets cooked Saturday or Sunday. We then try to select meals that take no more than an hour to make for weeknight cooking. Everything is made in large enough portions to get at least 1 and preferably 2-3 nights of leftovers which can be easily heated up or eaten cold.3 -
I certainly don't manage perfection, and there have been a lot of long periods of time when I really can't be bothered with the whole thing. Sometimes it is enough to just make it through the day!
I stick with it as I continue to try to improve my habits. It makes me more aware of what I am doing, even if I know I shouldn't be doing it!
Happiness is about achievable goals, so maybe try and break it down a bit. Do a bit of prep, if you use the same take away places what are the better choices? Pre-made salads, batch cooking, one pot meals can all be your friend. Soup, baked potatoes, eggs are all easy and quick. But please don't beat yourself up, you have plenty of other stuff to worry about.1 -
Its so hard I get u I have 6 kids. 4 older kids and twin toddlers so the day gets away from me as well I have coilitis so sometimes I couldn't even eat but when I had a good moment I would stuff my face . til I started being more aware of how much harm I was doing to myself. I started using my crock pot more so I could have dinner cooking while I was busy with my little ones or even if I had to go out and for myself portion control helps not only with my weight lost as well my coilitis. Dont be hard on urself u already made the hardest decision which was to be healthy just make small changes and if u mess up don't be too hard on urself2
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Give yourself credit for joining MFP and asking for advice. My feeling is, the weight isn't going to come off overnight, it took a long time for me to gain, so it's going to take a while to lose. I still have mini-binges once in a while, but I track everything and choose more wisely going forward. This is a lifestyle, not a diet. Keep it going, some days are easier than others, but we are with you all the way!1
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I think three days isn’t quite enough to see the progress you want to see, during that time your body is still adjusting to the change in intake. Stick to it, and don’t beat yourself up about having a day where you slipped, this is still all so new. Try to keep it all under the calorie total, and try not to stress so much. After all, stress pushes us for even more of the less nutritional comfort food.
Chin up, you’ve got this.0 -
Life is always happening. You can eat too much and be unhealthy as well as unhappy. Or you can eat properly and become healthy while being unhappy.
Getting happy is a different problem. Generally, count your blessings to become happy. If you can count to 1, that's 1, so start being happy.0 -
So how are you feeling now, OP? Do things feel a little more manageable?0
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I have previously been an "all or nothing" type of person...either I'm eating healthy or I am not. When I am successful it is because I've altered this behavior. For example, last weekend I ate a lot of junk, but I was able to pick back up Monday and I've had a successful week. There are a lot of healthy crock pot recipes on Pinterest that might work for a busy mom with toddlers...0
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Life is going to happen. You're absolutely right. And with kids, you will always be trading one difficult stage for something else. It never gets easier. So with that in mind, why not start now and figure out how to push through and get where you want to be sooner rather than later? Be proactive instead of reactive. There's no better time to start than now.
If making dinner is difficult, why not brainstorm ways to make it easier to get dinners on the table? Lots of good ideas have been offered here. If you occasionally eat out, then why not look at menus ahead of time to find something that fits your calorie goal? If you like treats, why not prelog them so you can fit them in? If you have an off day, so what? Start over tomorrow. Bestow some grace on yourself and move on. Nobody is perfect. In the grand scheme of things, a few off days aren't going to matter. Ask literally anyone who has been successful losing weight (that includes me), and they'll tell you they've had off days. Accept that this is part of the process, and learn how to anticipate these things so you can set yourself up for success.0 -
Why quit? Even if you mess up a day or two each week, at least trying is going to get you further than not trying at all. Keep going and you’ll figure out how it make it all a part of your routine, quit and nothing will change. It’s not easy but it does get easier the longer you stick with it.1
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I can imagine how hard it is to stay on a healthy eating plan with small kids and a husband. So hard! So, it isn't like it is easy. Give yourself a break.
First.. you have to have food in your house ready to go.. you need to find a few hours to meal prep as others have said. In your case.. I'd even buy lean cuisines as a back up for emergencies.. throw some frozen vegetables on top of the meal.. microwave it ..and eat.. you'll still be under 300 calories for your dinner.. if you add a quick salad from ready made cut lettuce.. you're only at 400.
and ordering take out?girl...???? We all know that's not good.. okay tastes good..but not good for a diet EVER. boo! takeout.
You have to plan... failing is part of learning.. you can do this! you are raising twins you are amazing!!!!0 -
A rule that a lot of people apply to healthy eating (Whether their aim is overall loss, gain or just to be healthier) is to the 80:20 rule. If you make sure chocolate, biscuits and junk don't make up more than 20% of your daily intake then you're not going OTT but you can still make room for the junk food if you're craving it. If you like takeaway, just have it once every couple of months (so you've had your takeaway now and in a few months you can treat yourself to another). But 2 cookies and 2 pieces of chocolate when you consider it really isn't a massive disaster.0
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