Less Alcohol - February 2019 - One Day at a Time

Orphia
Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
edited December 19 in Challenges
Do you want to drink less?

Do it because it's a lovely thing to do for yourself! I bet thinking a day off is a sort of punishment hasn't been working.

Be kind to the person you will wake up as.

Join us in drinking less (whatever that means for you) one day at a time as we continue to support and learn from each other.

MFP LESS ALCOHOL ONE DAY AT A TIME
RESOURCE & GENERAL INFORMATION LIST

Remember that we are here for you and care about you. Check in with us when you have time and let us know what you need!

USING OUR THREAD:
  • Join us at any time - this is a day to day challenge.
  • Set your own goal - this thread is about drinking less and you decide what that means to you.
  • There are no scheduled check-ins - post as often or as little as you want or need.
  • AF is an acronym for Alcohol Free. For others commonly used on this site see - https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1069278/acronyms-and-terms-for-new-mfp-members-v-6/p1
  • To follow this thread easily, bookmark it by clicking on the star at the top right of this thread.

TIPS & OBSERVATIONS FROM OUR MEMBERS:

Getting Started or Starting Over - The Early Days
  • Some people find it easier to set small attainable goals at the beginning to help boost confidence.
  • If you have been drinking daily the first days will be some of the hardest and drinking again will feel like a cure but it delays the relief that only time can provide.
  • There will always be a reason to delay the start/restart of your journey.
  • For those ready to commit to being alcohol-free permanently, the videos on YouTube by Craig Beck will help. He also has a program you can join.
  • You may experience mood swings and anxiety during your first two weeks. It is suggested you try and focus on the benefits of your goal.
  • Cravings are said to last only 6 minutes, so find something to distract you like arming yourself with alternatives: tea, mocktails, activities, etc.
  • You may find that filling the time you drink with other activities like exercise or hobbies can be a helpful distraction.
  • If you find them tempting try and avoid events/outings that will have drinking for a time.
  • Don't let pride or shame keep you from asking for the help you need.
  • Sometimes talking it out or posting your thoughts/feelings/struggles may help you work things out for yourself.
  • It is okay that you don't always have all the answers.
  • Some days will be easier than others.
  • You may have initial/increased sugar cravings.
  • You should never take a day that you have lived up to your goals for granted.
  • Celebrate the smaller victories too. Less alcohol is still less alcohol even if your goal was zero at that moment.
  • Once you begin sticking to your goals for one day to many days you should believe you are capable of the same and more because you are.
  • Annie Grace (This Naked Mind author) has a free program on her website (https://www.alcoholexperiment.com/) called the 30 day experiment which can be joined anonymously.
  • Failure is not giving in and drinking. Failure is to stop trying to accomplish your goals.

Life with Less Alcohol
  • It can be helpful to educate yourself with books and web research (Some suggested books and links listed below).
  • There is no benefit to comparing yourself to others because this is a personal journey.
  • You may often feel conflicted. You will know that there are numerous real benefits to sticking to your goal while at the same time think that alcohol is an important part of stress relief, relaxation, celebration, etc.
  • You may feel punished by not drinking or drinking less but that feeling usually fades with time.
  • Sometimes drinking less or quitting will strain friendships that centered around alcohol.
  • Having a list of reasons to stick to your goals handy for yourself can be helpful. Some lists have included remembering how bad it feels to have a hangover, excess/unwanted calories, having a racing heart during the night, sleeplessness, anxiety, and depression.
  • It is a good idea to have a plan for how you might deal with various tempting scenarios before engaging in a social situation.
  • Self-Reflection is an important part of the journey. Once we figure out why we drink we can hopefully use that information to form new habits and make better and more mindful decisions.
  • Sometimes doing something nice for yourself like a little reward for a success makes the journey easier.
  • You will see many helpful suggestions and ideas that work for some people. However, finding what tactics work for you may involve some trial and error.
  • It is not uncommon for certain activities that were once combined with alcohol to trigger temptation. Many have said that outdoor activities in warmer weather made alcohol very tempting.
  • Many that have spent time with no alcohol after drinking again realized that it doesn't enhance experiences like they once believed it did. Some have said they no longer like the taste.
  • Don't forget how sticking to your goal has made your life better and remember it to motivate you again if you fall off your path.
  • If you begin drinking daily again whether planned like a vacation or unplanned you may once again face a struggle to get it under control.
  • For some people it is easier to not drink than it is to moderate drinking. Others have found moderating impossible.

Reported Benefits of Less or No Drinking: (Results may be incremental, and/or they may vary)
  • Improved sleep after 2,4,7,10,& 60 days
  • Improved skin/complexion after 10 days
  • Improved ease in weight loss. Not only from the savings of alcohol calories but some report making poor food choices after drinking.
  • Increased energy after as few as 2 days
  • Increase in other fun activities. Some have found that daily drinking became their main recreational activity and their world was decreased in size.
  • Increased productivity
  • Reduction of high blood pressure
  • Lower resting heart rate
  • Less Acid Reflux
  • Significant financial savings
  • More creativity
  • More productivity
  • Better relationships with family

When Alcohol Is Used for Avoidance by @Orphia:
  • We drink to ease the stress of the working day, to avoid it.
  • We drink to avoid anxiety in social situations.
  • We drink to avoid making decisions about not drinking.
The Takeaway on Avoidance:
  • Our problems don't go away if we avoid them. We need to learn to face them.
  • I've learned that not drinking makes the problems often go away (e.g. drinking out of worry about drinking).
  • Having a clear head makes our problems seem much smaller.
  • Having a clear head makes problems easier to solve.

How to Be Kind to "Tomorrow You" by @Orphia
  • Instead of lumbering myself with guilt, headaches, and poor nutrition hangovers in the morning, I think of think how nice it would be not to feel that way tomorrow.
  • I worry about "me" and don't want "Tomorrow Me" to feel awful.
  • Instead of thinking alcohol is something nice to have *now*, think of *NOT drinking* as something nice we can do for the person we are when we awaken in the morning.
  • Do you bank calories for a festive occasion? (Handy tactic, I might add.)
  • We can bank a good mood for when we wake up.
  • We need to have sympathy for "Tomorrow You" and be kind to her/him.
  • Don't look at a day without alcohol as a punishment for being bad or having no willpower.
  • Not drinking is a lovely, sympathetic gesture towards the person we are now, and whom we will wake up as.
  • You’d be kind to a stranger. Be kind to Tomorrow You.
LINKS:
A Sharing Site for Women:
http://www.drinkingdiaries.com/about/

General Information/Blog Sites:
https://thesoberschool.com/
http://www.hipsobriety.com/
https://joinclubsoda.co.uk/
https://thisnakedmind.com/blog/
https://alcoholmastery.com/blog/

Sobriety Blog:
http://mummywasasecretdrinker.blogspot.com/

The Thirty Day Experiment:
https://www.alcoholexperiment.com/

Ten Things That Helped Me Quit Booze:
https://unpickledblog.com/2017/01/04/replacement-behaviours-ten-things-that-helped-me-kick-booze/?wref=tp

The Neuroscience Behind How We Make Decisions:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-athletes-way/201505/the-neuroscience-making-decision

Summary of Book on Addiction:
https://drgabormate.com/book/in-the-realm-of-hungry-ghosts/

Article on the Difference Between Being an Alcoholic and Really Liking to Drink:
https://www.self.com/story/alcoholic-or-just-really-like-to-drink

To the Mom questioning her drinking habits:
http://www.scarymommy.com/questioning-drinking-habits/

Guided Meditations:
http://marc.ucla.edu/mindful-meditations

ALTERNATIVE DRINKS:
Overnight Cold Brew Iced Tea:
https://www.splendidtable.org/story/you-can-cold-brew-iced-tea-while-you-sleep

Mocktail Recipes:
https://www.allrecipes.com/recipes/1822/drinks/mocktails/
https://www.foodandwine.com/cocktails-spirits/mocktails
https://www.townandcountrymag.com/leisure/drinks/how-to/g785/best-mocktail-recipes/

APPS:
BOOKS:
  • The Naked Mind by Annie Grace
  • Alcohol Lied to Me by Craig Beck
  • Rational Recovery by Jack Trimpey
  • The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray
  • The Liars Club, Cherry, and Lit by Mary Karr (3 different publications)
  • Kick the Drink...Easily by Jason Vale
  • Drinking: A Love Story by Caroline Knapp
  • Being Sober: A Step-by-Step Guide to Getting To, Getting Through, and Living in Recovery by Harry Haroutunian
  • The Easy, Illustrated Way to Quit Drinking by Alan Carr
  • Alcohol Explained by William Porter
VIDEOS:

https://youtu.be/T3eIiS-Rl4k
https://youtu.be/Qiueo1nVyF8
https://youtu.be/VB5WyBeFc8U
https://youtu.be/XNr62PhHOC8

Credit and Thanks to the MFP Less Alcohol One Day at a Time participants for their willingness to share their insights and resourcefulness in finding this information.

MFPLARD 07.28.18 Version 2.0 (compiled by @NovusDies ; revised 28 Dec 2018 by Orphia)



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Replies

  • MonkeyMel21
    MonkeyMel21 Posts: 2,396 Member
    I'm in for February! I still have a weight loss goal of at least 3 more lbs to lose. I'm not sure exactly how long that will take but when I do get to my goal weight, I want to still log at maintenance and add alcohol back in while keeping track of it and HOPEFULLY have a more positive relationship with alcohol for the years going forward. The last few years I have drank way too much, too often, and spent ridiculous amounts of money at the liquor store. I have a few planned nights in February that will include alcohol but beyond those, I want to abstain, for the most part. And the few days I may drink with my husband at home, I want to be able to include them in my calorie goal and not just make them nights where I give up and give in to drinking more than I should.
  • Ed_Zilla
    Ed_Zilla Posts: 207 Member
    Today is 1 week AF...

    I noticed my skin feels better this morning. Googled it - yep - drinking affects that too.
  • Lilylady3k
    Lilylady3k Posts: 4,023 Member
    edited February 2019
    I'm ready for February's challenge ... One day at a time!

    Goal: AF days 4 per week / 16 per month

    You’ll never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine. - John C. Maxwell

  • gymbunny09
    gymbunny09 Posts: 69 Member
    Ready for my 2nd month challenge was really pleased with my success in January.

    Only planning on having a few drinks (a glass of wine & 2 g&t ) on the 16th February for my hubbys birthday celebration and we are going out with friends for dinner. The rest of the month I plan to be alcohol free.

    It's my intention to only drink on special occasions or family get togethers & holidays. Which will probably be only once per month.
  • BuffMom84
    BuffMom84 Posts: 180 Member
    Congrats to everyone who had a Dry or mostly Dry January! Now that I look back and think about it, I could have done it as well. I was dedicated enough to do 30 days of yoga last month, so adding a totally AF January probably wouldn't have been too much more difficult than what I'm doing now.

    I still plan on drinking once per week on Friday nights and I'm working on drinking even less on those nights. I tend to stay up too late on Fridays so I'm going to make myself go to bed one hour (and hopefully one beer) earlier tonight.
  • LazyBlondeChef
    LazyBlondeChef Posts: 2,809 Member
    I only drink on weekends and vacations but I know it adds a lot of extra calories each week and for me it's necessary to drink less in order to lose weight and keep it off.

    My goal is to limit myself to two drinks per day Fri-Sun. Currently I do 3-4 spread out over many hours.

    I love the taste of cocktails so I've been experimenting with mocktails but they can sometimes be as caloric as the real thing so I'm trying to find ways to minimize that. I drink espresso in the morning and water throughout the day but get bored with it. I don't drink milk at all. I rarely drink tea, juice or soda. I don't have a sweet tooth and like strong flavors so I need low calorie substitutes so ideas are welcome.

  • Sub4_2018
    Sub4_2018 Posts: 52 Member
    @Orphia - Thanks so much for keeping the thread going!

    I'm in for February! I stayed AF for all of January and feel so good that I don't plan to add it back quite yet. I don't know what my overall goal is, but I'm taking it one day at a time and have a short term goal of staying AF until Valentine's Day. Happy February, everyone!
  • WinoGelato
    WinoGelato Posts: 13,454 Member
    In for mindful moderation. Jan was a little more damp than I planned but Feb should be manageable to stick to a plan of weekdays free (other than a business trip mid month and book club) and weekends (Fri -Sat and Sunday may go either way).

    I may even take day one off since this week included a business trip and book club to finish off January with 3 weeknights drinking. :(
  • Lilylady3k
    Lilylady3k Posts: 4,023 Member
    You’ll never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine. - John C. Maxwell

    February accountability ~1 days so far
    No Alcohol: 1 days
    Alcohol: 0 days (0 drinks)
    Goal: AF days 4 per week / 16 per month

    Including the last few days of January to monitor my weekly goal
    Jan 28 - AF
    Jan 29 - AF ! Yeah me! Dining Out group.
    Jan 30 - AF
    Jan 31 - Planned 2 but kept to 1 glass wine! Retiring from company after 30 years
    Feb 1 - AF
    Feb 2 -
    Feb 3 -
    Woohhhooo! Friday - Already have my 4 AF days this week. That wasn’t too hard.
  • Womona
    Womona Posts: 1,813 Member
    Hi all! Felt so good to reduce alcohol (and facial puffiness) that I’m in for February as well. My goal is AF week nights and weekend only drinking- and then only one glass of wine/night instead of 2 or more.

    Had events all week last week and drank every night, so I plan to avoid tonight and tomorrow during the Super Bowl. Good luck everyone!
  • Will_Run_for_Food
    Will_Run_for_Food Posts: 561 Member
    So I made it through January - the longest, coldest, darkest month - sans booze. And I'm really proud of myself for it. But I'm not proud that I drank yesterday (about 5 or 6 drinks) just because it was February 1. In any case, man did I feel it today. I haven't had a headache that bad in ages.

    I treated it sort of as an experiment. I kept a diary of how I felt throughout January and wanted to compare it to how I felt today, the day after drinking. In summary, Saturday mornings are soooooo muuuuuuch betteeeeeeeer without a hangover. Which isn't rocket science, but I am happy for the reminder.

    I've got a few occasions coming up this month where I will plan to have no more than a few drinks. Target is 5 days (or less) over the next three weeks (we're going to an all-inclusive on Feb 23 so I'll cross that bridge when I get there).
  • dawnbgethealthy
    dawnbgethealthy Posts: 7,927 Member
    Polydactylkat wrote: »
    Today I plan to have my first AF day. I’m setting my goals ‘low’ at first as I am making big lifestyle changes between what I eat, what I drink (or don’t drink), and how much I move. Trying to replace my after work drink routine with gym time and/or cooking a nice meal time.

    So I think I’ll try AF today, one Af day this coming week, then increase to 2 next week, then 3,then 4. Ultimate goal - only drink 1 or no days per week, unless there’s a super special occasion and then limit what I have.

    I’m tired of feeling yucky and cloudy headed :( And now that I’m logging, I have WAY too many calories from alcohol. One draft beer can be over 200in itself! Yeesh.

    Yes, I started slowly too. When I signed up for MFP I had drinks every single day for 6 months. It became an after work habit to be sure. I started with 2 AF days the first week -- and it was surprisingly hard! I went 3AF the next week and then settled into 4AF per week as my goal.
  • dawnbgethealthy
    dawnbgethealthy Posts: 7,927 Member
    Goal: 4AF days per week. It is a short month.

    February 1 - 3 drinks
    February 2 -
    February 3 - Superbowl!
    February 4
    February 5
    February 6
    February 7
    February 8
    February 9
    February 10
    February 11
    February 12
    February 13
    February 14
    February 15
    February 16
    February 17
    February 18
    February 19
    February 20
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    February 23
    February 24
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    February 26
    February 27
    February 28
  • Lilylady3k
    Lilylady3k Posts: 4,023 Member
    edited February 2019
    February accountability ~2 days so far
    No Alcohol: 2 days
    Alcohol: 0 days (0 drinks)
    Goal: AF days 4 per week / 16 per month

    Including the last few days of January to monitor my weekly goal which I have succeeded!
    Jan 28 - AF
    Jan 29 - AF ! Yeah me! Dining Out group.
    Jan 30 - AF Office celebration mexican restaurant without margaritas :)
    Jan 31 - Planned 2 but kept to 1 glass wine! Celebrating retirement from company after 30 years
    Feb 1 - AF
    Feb 2 - AF Brunch without mimosas
    Feb 3 -
  • MonkeyMel21
    MonkeyMel21 Posts: 2,396 Member
    I did well in January but towards the end starting having a few unplanned days of drinking. Last night was a planned night since I went out with a co-worker. I drank a couple times last week and while I didn’t gain weight, I didn’t keep to my losing trend I had going. I’m excited to get back on track this weekend but today was hard. I have a very small bottle of rum, one of those tiny plastic ones, enough for a few drinks. I really wanted one but it definitely wouldn’t have fit in to my calorie goal. I’m happy that I was able to resist. I wanted to save it for a day next week when I’m home with my husband. I’m hoping I’ll be able to resist it tomorrow as well. I have a big work out planned!

    I’m happy to have you all here for February!
  • WinoGelato
    WinoGelato Posts: 13,454 Member
    Lilylady3k wrote: »
    @kittybeann @WinoGelato @MissMay @Sub4_2018 @Womona
    Thank you to all those that wished me well on the retirement in the January thread. First day of retirement Feb 1 I sat down and decided I needed a plan (you have to know me I LOVE LISTS). Well I mapped out my weekly and daily activities to get myself up and going starting with a walk, bike ride and/or yoga each day. It was wonderful to put on my calendar things that I personally want to accomplish instead of conference calls, meetings, reports, driving 2+hrs round trip to the office, etc etc that kept me at my desk or sitting all day.

    And though I'm celebrating ... the first half of January showed me that I can do that with less wine. Today's retirement celebration brunch I skipped the mimosas. Why is it that when people find out you are retiring they all think of celebrating with food and alcohol? Today was my 5th celebration. (3 out of 5 celebration dinners/brunch AF; Jan 25 celebration was not pretty but Jan 31 I did much better) Whew!

    Considering I’m in the thick of my career on a bit of an upward spiral right now for both responsibilities and stress - I am so envious of that list you made and the plans you have!

    Also so impressive that you’ve stuck to AF through these recent days and events! That is one thing I haven’t mastered yet, outright saying no thanks at social events when others are drinking. I’ve gotten a lot better at limiting myself and stopping once I start - but I still do enjoy the social aspect of drinking with friends.
  • Lilylady3k
    Lilylady3k Posts: 4,023 Member
    @WinoGelato AF vs drinking is a journey for me as well. And trying to limit myself to 1 or 2 when the wine cork is pulled is difficult. I love wine and socializing with friends and family. Right now it was good that I had the focus and desire to stick to a plan. When summer comes along I have a feeling it will be much more difficult to keep that resolve!

    On the career front. Have you read the book "Lean In" by Sheryl Sandberg? Enjoy the move upward.
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