Less Alcohol - February 2019 - One Day at a Time
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Another weekend in the books! So far since adding alcohol back, I've been able to stick to 4 AF days a week, and no more than 3 drinks in a sitting. This coming weekend will be my first real "test" as one of my closest girlfriends is coming into town and spending 3-4 nights with us. My plan is to drink Fri/Sat but to take it slow and continually check in with myself. It feels very doable right now so I'm hoping it stays that way as the weekend gets closer!1
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drag myself back in here to tell you all that since last thursday I've been drinking something daily LOL! I am HOWEVER stopping myself and saying "ok enough, you have your buzz, now cut it out"..... For V Day only had 3 glasses of wine (we usually get 3-4 bottles) between us (6 people) so that was a big improvement. My friends and I are all mindfully drinking LESS. I am jumping back in and not drinking the rest of the month, I HOPE3
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@marcvb35 one drink less than you normally have is great progress! This thread is great because it’s everyone drinking less- whatever that means to you. It is hard to break the daily habit, but stick with it, soon enough that craving will disappear.
Very inspired by everyone’s journey on this thread. Thanks for being so supportive!2 -
FeelinFooFoo wrote: »Even although I drank too much on Saturday, and am still suffering from a slight hangover I am trying to focus on some positives of what I have achieved. I seem to have managed to stop drinking every weekend and in fact, I don't even want to drink the way I used to be. In fact my recent binge drinking session and awful hangover is now making me question if I want to drink at all! Or maybe start having a limit in place for when I do drink.
This hangover brought with it, a feeling of depression, anxiety and I feel so unorganized and iv slipped off my diet, I just don't see how any of this is worth it.
Lots of things for me to think about.
Your post are really connecting with me. If you have answered this in the past I apologize, but.....how long have you been able to monitor your drinking? Were you an every night drinker?
I feel funny asking these questions, but I am struggling. Love my drinking. Know it MUST change....or completely stop.2 -
2/18 first day of less could be today.
25 years of binge drinking, almost every day, short term goal is to drink only one half gallon a week. long term goal is less then a 1/5th and only drink on the weekend.
todays plan. Don't buy a bottle. only have a couple at the local tavern along with dinner.
2/18 -- walked into the bar with a plan of having 5 whiskey and water with my wife. food service was fast and wife decided to stay home. 4 drinks and 2 giant burgers and I headed home without a bottle in my hand. thought I was tired 4 hours later and went to bed, nope not going to sleep good. stomach cramps and mind racing, did get a little sleep.
2/19 - tummy still aching, eyes still puffy. made it to work on time, not sure what todays plan is. maybe to soon for AF as I have read about some pretty bad health problems from cold turkey, including death. see you tomorrow to finish this story. good luck all and thanks for the support!
Keep coming back. I need you.
I feel like you get it.
I know all here most likely do, but I struggle so much.
Each day is a new beginning.5 -
February accountability ~19 days so far
No Alcohol: 11 days
Alcohol: 8 days (16 drinks)
Goal: AF days 4 per week / 16 per month
You’ll never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine. - John C. MaxwellIncluding the last few days of January to monitor my weekly goal which I surpassed!
Jan 28 - AF
Jan 29 - AF ! Yeah me! Dining Out group.
Jan 30 - AF Office celebration mexican restaurant without margaritas
Jan 31 - Planned 2 but kept to 1 glass wine! Celebrating retirement from company after 30 years
Feb 1 - AF
Feb 2 - AF Brunch without mimosas
Feb 3 - AF
Hit my target of 4 AF days per week again! This is getting easier. It is all about balancing my life choices.
Feb 4 - AF
Feb 5 - AF - I wanted a bottle of wine but we didn’t buy it.
Feb 6 - AF - DH wanted a bottle of wine but we passed.
Feb 7 - Bunco: 2 glasses wine (planned for 1 but poured myself a 2nd out of habit)
Feb 8 - 2 glasses wine
Feb 9 - AF
Feb 10 - AF
Not a good week. Only 2 AF days when the target it 4 for the week. But I’m still good for achieving the monthly goal. And the previous 2 weeks I was 5-6 AF days each week. The camp is definitely a challenge!
Feb 11 - AF
Feb 12 - AF
Feb 13 - 3 glasses wine. DD moving day. DD’s thank you for us caring for their dog for 3 days while they packed and then helping with the move all day … was wine, pizza & Randazzo’s king cake. DH & my first date Feb 13 seems like a zillion years ago.
Note: Challenging weekend ahead (next 4 nights). Usually I have 3-5 drinks per night at the fishing camp. Plus my sister will be there and she brought bottles of wine. Plan 1 drink per evening.
Feb 14 - 2 beers sunset at the fishing camp this weekend
Feb 15 - 1 glass of wine with Mom's 82nd birthday dinner
Feb 16 - 1 beer
Feb 17 - 2 beer
Feb 18 - 3 glasses of wine. Bookclub: Turned out the hostess had a company come in and do a surprise wine tasting session.
Feb 19 - AF
Feb 20 - Bookclub: Plan AF (Annual physical)
Feb 21 - Alumnae Meeting called For the Love of Wine & Girl Scout Cookies … this pairing tasting could be a real challenge!
Feb 22 -
Feb 23 -
Feb 24 -0 -
2/18 first day of less could be today.
25 years of binge drinking, almost every day, short term goal is to drink only one-half gallon a week. long term goal is less than a 1/5th and only drink on the weekend.
today’s plan. Don't buy a bottle. only have a couple at the local tavern along with dinner.
2/18 -- walked into the bar with a plan of having 5 whiskey and water with my wife. food service was fast, and wife decided to stay home. 4 drinks and 2 giant burgers and I headed home without a bottle in my hand. thought I was tired 4 hours later and went to bed, nope not going to sleep well. stomach cramps and mind racing did get a little sleep.
2/19 - tummy still aching, eyes still puffy. made it to work on time, not sure what todays plan is. maybe too soon for AF as I have read about some pretty bad health problems from cold turkey, including death. see you tomorrow to finish this story. good luck all and thanks for the support!
2/20 – good morning, I made a decision before the end of the work day to drink more then 2/18 – I asked my wife to help me help us by helping me which could help me help everyone , I wrote up a plan, printed it , and picked up a half gallon (normally 2 days provisions) and showed her the plan. She filled the flask and hid the bottle from me, I have a detailed taper off plan for the next 2 weeks and I do not want to fail like last week.
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@marcvb35 one drink less than you normally have is great progress! This thread is great because it’s everyone drinking less- whatever that means to you. It is hard to break the daily habit, but stick with it, soon enough that craving will disappear.
Very inspired by everyone’s journey on this thread. Thanks for being so supportive!
lol -thank you but on 2/18 I did plan on 5 weak drinks from the bar and only had 4. just so you know this was way less then normal and I had to make a new plan.
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AbandondedKSCharger wrote: »
Keep coming back. I need you.
I feel like you get it.
I know all here most likely do, but I struggle so much.
Each day is a new beginning.
I am back --- This is my AA because I am to shy to speak out in public (without a drink) and I don't plan on quitting drinking 100%. I will be here for all but remember I am an addict/extremist and probably do not have good or healthy advice on drinking less or dieting. kinda on a diet break right now to focus on the drinking
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AbandondedKSCharger wrote: »
Keep coming back. I need you.
I feel like you get it.
I know all here most likely do, but I struggle so much.
Each day is a new beginning.
I am back --- This is my AA because I am to shy to speak out in public (without a drink) and I don't plan on quitting drinking 100%. I will be here for all but remember I am an addict/extremist and probably do not have good or healthy advice on drinking less or dieting. kinda on a diet break right now to focus on the drinking
The fact that you are here sharing with us is inspiration, so dont think you dont have something to offer us. Good for you that you are making a plan- that is a fantastic first step. YOU GOT THIS!3 -
2/1: 3 drinks
2/2: AF
2/3: 1 drink
2/4: AF
2/5: AF
2/6: 1 Beer.
2/7: 6 beers, 2 shots and frustration
2/8: AF
2/9: Um, went to a rock concert...so too much to count
2/10: AF
2/11: 2 beers
2/12: AF
2/13: AF
2/14: a 6 pack basically.
2/15: AF
2/16: AF
2/17: 2 beers.
2/18: AF
2/19: AF4 -
@AbandondedKSCharger @FeelinFooFoo @marcvb35 Some may not reveal just how dark there struggles have been, or still are, here. I had gotten to every night drinking (oh, and sometimes at lunch, and sometimes a 4 am IPA after insomnia after a night of drinking). I very well could still be if my bf had not become less and less tolerant. While I owe him gratitude, I'm still kinda pissed off at him. Anyway, thought I'd be really honest here and share an entry from my journal I wrote last weekend.
Hidden Reminders
Yesterday I was digging in my underwear drawer for magic cellulite-be-gone panties. I was going out Saturday night to get my 70’s groove on. It’s been a while since I’ve done laundry. It’s sweet for my SO to do my laundry, but my underthings were already on the tight side without getting a 40 minute blast of hot dryer air. In the back corner of my drawer, I found a mini-box of Bota Rose. At first glance, I couldn’t remember if it was full or empty. It was the latter. I suppose people could be grouped into two buckets. Those that hide their alcohol, and those that don’t. I don’t remember when I drank it. I still have one or two full boxes in some drawer. I guess I’m not sure what to do with them. I still have a small mason jar in my jewelry drawer. Drinking while getting ready to go out where my bf wouldn’t see me. I left it there. I think moving it would make the patheticness of it more real. Maybe I’ll repurpose it for rings.
I did try to get my groove on, but it was way too crowded. I’d been feeling like I wanted to have a few glasses of wine for days. Though we had a hotel, we left it open as to whether we’d use it or not. I ended up having a Bud Light, and then an O’Doul’s. I really could have done without the Bud Light, but I don’t like rules, and I didn’t want this not drinking to become a giant thing. It’s hard to explain. I think my workout Saturday morning was key in not really wanting more to drink. That and wanting to feel great waking up.
I found another empty box today in my computer backpack in my home office. I stuffed it into the middle of the kitchen trash and then dumped vacuumed-up-fur on it. Can’t get much safer than that. In order to replace a bad habit with a good habit, I’ve now “hidden” a package of Dove chocolates and vanilla Oreos. I’m kinda hiding it from both of us. So far, the bags are full. However, if I do want to have a little binge, I’m going to binge on stuff I love--not leftover ginger snaps that there was no time to smear on the Christmas ham. (Sorry pig--ham wasn’t my idea and I would never eat it. Except I don’t remember last Christmas dinner because I was snockered, so I might have--I’ll never know.)
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May the force be with me! I'm ice fishing at 9p tonight and safely assume my bf does not want me bringing wine.4
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@mainelylisa thank you. I needed to hear that. Daily, really every day, for atleast 9 years now, I have been trying to talk myself in to quitting. I hear my husband say quitting is for losers. I know AA is the answer. I don't want to go there. Heck, I went to Al-Anon for about 7 years while my husband was out prowling while I was home raising our children. Anyways, every day is a new opportunity to do better. Had a nice 15 minute discussion with a co-worker/friend yesterday about his 2 year sobriety. Again I need to remind myself at this point; I quit smoking 19 years ago. That was a huge accomplishment. I no longer buy 3 - 5 bottles of wine a week. This is still pretty recent that I have accomplished this so it still amazes me I finally hurtled that obstacle. I can overcome this. I know I can. But while going through it, it seems so difficult and never ending. I need to keep beating myself up over the shame of those days I go to work hungover. Oh new one to beat myself up over, I lost my Christmas present from my husband.....a beautiful gold bracelet
It is because I was hungover last Friday....can't find it. So what am I going to do different today? My plan today is NOT to stop at the liquor store and buy another 12 pack. I CAN ………..OHHHHH the anxiety this causes just saying it...….I can go one night without any alcohol. I must. After-all, I want to live to be 100 and I want to play outside chasing my grandchildren. God give me strength. 7 -
@marcvb35 YES!! My AA too...……...I live in a small town and those that don't know I drink, don't need to know...well that's how I feel now....may not be right, but anyways the point is....I am so thankful for this group!
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There are alternatives to AA--which is so not my thing (unless I can go to one with only people like those on Mom :-)). One is Smart Recovery (smartrecovery.org), which is science based, located in both in US and UK, and has online meetings as well.4
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Goal: 4AF days per week. It is a short month.
February 1 - 3 drinks
February 2 - AF
February 3 - 3 drinks - Superbowl was boring this year. I have to rack up some AF days!
February 4 - AF
February 5 - AF
February 6 - AF
February 7 - 3 drinks
February 8 - AF, but was planning on some champagne in the bubble bath. I had such a nice dinner that I didn't have any calories left for champagne - heavy whipping cream chicken pesto with linguine. Lots of calories, but all within my range for the day.
February 9 - AF
February 10 - 3 drinks
February 11 - AF
February 12 - AF
February 13 - 3 drinks
February 14 - AF
February 15 - AF - Mulled wine at my house tomorrow, in between the snowmobile events, bands and fireworks. (We will be out standing in the snow, the streets are closed for the event). The mulled wine will simmer all day. Really looking forward to some wintery fun and the smell that my house will take on from the cinnamon and cloves, oranges, port and wine. I like that I have known about it for weeks and am happy to have racked up AF days this month. If I don't feel well Sunday morning I will just stay in bed.
February 16 - Mulled wine over the course of 8 hours. Kept it topped up every time we came back to my house out of the snow in between events. I actually am not sure how much I had. It was delicious. I don't mind having mulled wine once a year. There is a bunch left over though...
February 17 - 1/2 of a Caesar out at dinner, then 3 drinks later. Plus I ate a bunch of the strained oranges out of the leftover mulled wine lol. 2 glasses of that left, planning to drink them on Wednesday, put it in the fridge. It has been a really fun BC family day weekend. I do feel good to be moderating. I still feel like having drinks every day, but just don't anymore.
February 18 - AF
February 19 - AF
February 20
February 21
February 22 - planned night out
February 23
February 24
February 25
February 26
February 27
February 28
Running tab: 12 AF days out of 19 days - need at least 4 more AF days to hit my goal for the month.0 -
AbandondedKSCharger wrote: »@mainelylisa thank you. I needed to hear that. Daily, really every day, for atleast 9 years now, I have been trying to talk myself in to quitting. I hear my husband say quitting is for losers. I know AA is the answer. I don't want to go there. Heck, I went to Al-Anon for about 7 years while my husband was out prowling while I was home raising our children. Anyways, every day is a new opportunity to do better. Had a nice 15 minute discussion with a co-worker/friend yesterday about his 2 year sobriety. Again I need to remind myself at this point; I quit smoking 19 years ago. That was a huge accomplishment. I no longer buy 3 - 5 bottles of wine a week. This is still pretty recent that I have accomplished this so it still amazes me I finally hurtled that obstacle. I can overcome this. I know I can. But while going through it, it seems so difficult and never ending. I need to keep beating myself up over the shame of those days I go to work hungover. Oh new one to beat myself up over, I lost my Christmas present from my husband.....a beautiful gold bracelet It is because I was hungover last Friday....can't find it. So what am I going to do different today? My plan today is NOT to stop at the liquor store and buy another 12 pack. I CAN ………..OHHHHH the anxiety this causes just saying it...….I can go one night without any alcohol. I must. After-all, I want to live to be 100 and I want to play outside chasing my grandchildren. God give me strength.
I had been drinking daily before deciding to make the change. Honestly, my choice to do so was really weight based...as long as I kept drinking I kept putting on more and more weight.
The first day that I decided would be AF was really hard! I did 1 AF day the first week, 2 the second 3 the 3rd week, 4 the 4th. Started to lose weight.
Even now, days that I decide will be AF are not easy. There isn't a day that goes by where I don't want to have something - peppermint schnapps in hot chocolate on a cold day for example (many more examples than just that).
Arriving at 4AF days per week is settling in with me. Definitely finding something else to drink is important. Some people on here like to have ginger tea, others bitters in ginger ale.
Being accountable in here and logging daily has been the charm for me, along with the sense of community that this forum offers. Knowing that I will be logging in here the next morning prevents me from having drinks on my planned AF days.
Yes, you can go 1 day AF. Once you do it you will feel a great sense of accomplishment that you did it. We all have to start somewhere if we want change. It is just 1 day.6 -
I see alot of folks here talking about replacing the alcohol with bitters etc. It never dawned on me that its the flavor that is craved. HONESTLY for ME personally, i just want the BUZZ, i want that lull - now that i type this, it even sounds ridiculous to want to be in a lull - lol I dont much care for the taste of a lot of stuff. Aside from a good beer, a nice wine alcohol truly doesnt taste like vanilla ice cream lol.
What are your personal reasons for drinking aside from the dependency? Taste? the feeling? etc6 -
gladys0919 wrote: »I see alot of folks here talking about replacing the alcohol with bitters etc. It never dawned on me that its the flavor that is craved. HONESTLY for ME personally, i just want the BUZZ, i want that lull - now that i type this, it even sounds ridiculous to want to be in a lull - lol I dont much care for the taste of a lot of stuff. Aside from a good beer, a nice wine alcohol truly doesnt taste like vanilla ice cream lol.
What are your personal reasons for drinking aside from the dependency? Taste? the feeling? etc
Probably was the feeling for the most part, but that was because i believed a lot of lies that were in my brain....i've battled with intrusive and ruminating thoughts for about 18 years....and i thought the thoughts were true and the only way to escape was drinking to the point of being buzzed so i could bear myself enough to sleep.
However, i now know that i don't need alcohol to rest because i know these thoughts aren't at all me...but just a way to bring dread and torment. I can't explain the joy i have knowing that i don't need alcohol, but i can drink it because i want a drink now because i just want to , and not feel like it's a self-medicating thing.
Now, its more taste. I live beside two breweries (no joke)...and today i'm gonna treat myself to a couple of IPA's.
Thanks for posting the question!5
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