An intellect rivaled only by garden tools
Replies
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Oh, and did I mention that one time I was in a massive fancy department store browsing around the clothing racks, and I turned and walked very purposefully towards the next rack and faceplanted into the very clean MIRROR that was in front of me?
That was choice.13 -
I hate those giant mirrors that sometimes adorn the walls of restaurants. I'm terrible with getting tricked into thinking what I'm seeing is another half of the dining room, not a reflection of the one I'm in. One time I saw a friend approaching our table and legit waved at his reflection in the mirror instead of him.7
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nutmegoreo wrote: »Crafty_camper123 wrote: »I'm blonde. And live up to my stereotype on a regular basis. I could have easily written this thread, lol!
One of my best blonde moments:
When I was younger, I made cereal and put the bowl in the trash, the milk in the cupboard, and the cereal in the fridge. It was discovered a short while later when my mom asked why the milk was in the cupboard. I have not put my phone in the fridge yet, but it's only a matter of time.
Other good ones that occur with some frequency:
- I say "good morning" or "good afternoon" to answer the work phone. I don't always say the right thing at the right time of day however. People's reactions to this are pretty funny.
- Make a pot of coffee and turn it on. Wonder why my coffee is clear, and not brown. Remember I forgot to put COFFEE in the pot!
- walking into a room completely forgetting why I am there.
- Trying to throw the whole plate away instead of scraping the food into the trash.
- Stopping at a stop sign (not a light), and waiting for it to turn green.
Ugh, I've made a couple cups of tea without the tea bag. Sad thing is, I did this two days in a row. Never before, and only once since. Yup, it's getting worse with age too.
I find that it helps to go back into the room you came from to remember why you went into the other one.
Not for me, I'll just find another distraction. But in the middle of said distraction it usually comes back to me, LOL. If this gets worse with age, what's it going to be like when I'm actually old(er)?! I've been this way my whole life! 
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Crafty_camper123 wrote: »nutmegoreo wrote: »Crafty_camper123 wrote: »I'm blonde. And live up to my stereotype on a regular basis. I could have easily written this thread, lol!
One of my best blonde moments:
When I was younger, I made cereal and put the bowl in the trash, the milk in the cupboard, and the cereal in the fridge. It was discovered a short while later when my mom asked why the milk was in the cupboard. I have not put my phone in the fridge yet, but it's only a matter of time.
Other good ones that occur with some frequency:
- I say "good morning" or "good afternoon" to answer the work phone. I don't always say the right thing at the right time of day however. People's reactions to this are pretty funny.
- Make a pot of coffee and turn it on. Wonder why my coffee is clear, and not brown. Remember I forgot to put COFFEE in the pot!
- walking into a room completely forgetting why I am there.
- Trying to throw the whole plate away instead of scraping the food into the trash.
- Stopping at a stop sign (not a light), and waiting for it to turn green.
Ugh, I've made a couple cups of tea without the tea bag. Sad thing is, I did this two days in a row. Never before, and only once since. Yup, it's getting worse with age too.
I find that it helps to go back into the room you came from to remember why you went into the other one.
Not for me, I'll just find another distraction. But in the middle of said distraction it usually comes back to me, LOL. If this gets worse with age, what's it going to be like when I'm actually old(er)?! I've been this way my whole life!
I've had moments, but it's definitely getting worse with age. I'm still cute though, so at least there's that.6 -
I'm old, not cute, and who are all you people???6
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snickerscharlie wrote: »I'm old, not cute, and who are all you people???
You have that long flowing purple hair. Although, I suspect you have two horns, not just one. Close enough to cute!4 -
snickerscharlie wrote: »I'm old, not cute, and who are all you people???
You aren't cute - you are stunning. I am assuming that's a selfie you are showing the world.
And all these people are the ones who believe in you!
(I need sleep)3 -
I've left an orange in a duffel bag, in a closet, so long it turned into a brown, wrinkled baseball. How it didn't get moldy is a mystery. Hubby found it looking for something else I lost.
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. - I say "good morning" or "good afternoon" to answer the work phone. I don't always say the right thing at the right time of day however. People's reactions to this are pretty funny.
Oh that reminds me. When I get tired I accidentally mix up my words.
Once answered phone at end of long day at work with Paperpudding helping, can I speak you?11 -
RelCanonical wrote: »I have totally done the thing where you think a garlic "clove" is the whole garlic in a pasta recipe and all you can taste is garlic for a few days. It was still good, though.
My mom added a whole bulb to a soup once instead of a clove. It was horrendous 😂1 -
nutmegoreo wrote: »Crafty_camper123 wrote: »I'm blonde. And live up to my stereotype on a regular basis. I could have easily written this thread, lol!
One of my best blonde moments:
When I was younger, I made cereal and put the bowl in the trash, the milk in the cupboard, and the cereal in the fridge. It was discovered a short while later when my mom asked why the milk was in the cupboard. I have not put my phone in the fridge yet, but it's only a matter of time.
Other good ones that occur with some frequency:
- I say "good morning" or "good afternoon" to answer the work phone. I don't always say the right thing at the right time of day however. People's reactions to this are pretty funny.
- Make a pot of coffee and turn it on. Wonder why my coffee is clear, and not brown. Remember I forgot to put COFFEE in the pot!
- walking into a room completely forgetting why I am there.
- Trying to throw the whole plate away instead of scraping the food into the trash.
- Stopping at a stop sign (not a light), and waiting for it to turn green.
Ugh, I've made a couple cups of tea without the tea bag. Sad thing is, I did this two days in a row. Never before, and only once since. Yup, it's getting worse with age too.
I find that it helps to go back into the room you came from to remember why you went into the other one.
I find new and wonderful things to do in that room when I try this....only to remember later that I did go in there for something else entirely
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snickerscharlie wrote: »I'm old, not cute, and who are all you people???
You aren't cute - you are stunning. I am assuming that's a selfie you are showing the world.
And all these people are the ones who believe in you!
(I need sleep)
Sleep wasn't my first choice of what you need. 2 -
I used to work in the records department in a hospital, and answered the ever-ringing phone "Medical records, Marti". Nine times out of ten that was how I answered the phone at home. Everybody I knew got used to it, but sometimes there would be a pause, then "oops, wrong number" as people hung up, then called back. Or didn't.4
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I used to work in the records department in a hospital, and answered the ever-ringing phone "Medical records, Marti". Nine times out of ten that was how I answered the phone at home. Everybody I knew got used to it, but sometimes there would be a pause, then "oops, wrong number" as people hung up, then called back. Or didn't.
Oh yes, I definitely said "thank you for calling Google AdWords, may I have your customer ID?" way too many times after I quit that job. I still have the number memorized and accidentally give that out instead of my actual number (but fortunately, I catch myself before I finish).3 -
snickerscharlie wrote: »snickerscharlie wrote: »I'm old, not cute, and who are all you people???
You aren't cute - you are stunning. I am assuming that's a selfie you are showing the world.
And all these people are the ones who believe in you!
(I need sleep)
Sleep wasn't my first choice of what you need.
I don't think I want to know! (Unless it's chocolate, I always need chocolate.) 0 -
a few days before my wedding, i threw out 200 dollars in the garbage.
i still haven't lived that down!
*and yes i had to go through the filth to get it. thank god it was in an envelope*
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snickerscharlie wrote: »snickerscharlie wrote: »I'm old, not cute, and who are all you people???
You aren't cute - you are stunning. I am assuming that's a selfie you are showing the world.
And all these people are the ones who believe in you!
(I need sleep)
Sleep wasn't my first choice of what you need.
I don't think I want to know! (Unless it's chocolate, I always need chocolate.)
Let's go with chocolate, then.
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bannock_and_biceps wrote: »a few days before my wedding, i threw out 200 dollars in the garbage.
i still haven't lived that down!
*and yes i had to go through the filth to get it. thank god it was in an envelope*
I was in such a hurry to leave the hairdresser I almost tipped her a hundred dollar bill. Thankfully she was honest and gave it back.
Glad you found the money.3 -
Got in my car after work today, started it up to get the AC going...and proceeded to dig through my purse looking for my keys
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Looking for my glasses and my keys.
Desperately.
So I can leave the house and remove the dog from the drive through downstairs kitchen window!
Thankfully I found my glasses.... on my forehead.
And the keys... below my wallet and gloves
...all of which I was holding in my right hand (keys, then gloves, then wallet)5 -
I missed 3 calls today because I couldn't find my phone, it sounds close but I can't find it.....it waist my back pocket and i kept turning around together closer to the sound
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OMG this thread has been the best thank you OP! 2
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Looking for my glasses and my keys.
Desperately.
So I can leave the house and remove the dog from the drive through downstairs kitchen window!
Thankfully I found my glasses.... on my forehead.
And the keys... below my wallet and gloves
...all of which I was holding in my right hand (keys, then gloves, then wallet)
I once woke up excited about the miraculous improvement in my eyesight, only to realize I had fallen asleep with my contact lenses in. I was disappoint.
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I misplaced my cell phone in my office and wanted to leave. I called (with my office phone) a co-worker who I knew was still there and asked him to call my cell, so I could hear it ring. He said okay and did it. Then a couple of minutes later he stuck his head in my door and said "why didn't you call your phone yourself?" I said, "what do you mean, I couldn't find my phone." And then "oh, right!"12
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nutmegoreo wrote: »Looking for my glasses and my keys.
Desperately.
So I can leave the house and remove the dog from the drive through downstairs kitchen window!
Thankfully I found my glasses.... on my forehead.
And the keys... below my wallet and gloves
...all of which I was holding in my right hand (keys, then gloves, then wallet)
I once woke up excited about the miraculous improvement in my eyesight, only to realize I had fallen asleep with my contact lenses in. I was disappoint.
OMG on that note, one time I got absolutely hammered - like i'm talking so drunk I was catatonic - anyway, somehow before I collapsed on the bed (however it was that I got there), I managed to take my contact lenses out and put them neatly away in their container in the bathroom.
I did not remember doing that.
When I woke up blind because didn't have contacts in, I not only had a shock that I thought I was still blind drunk (because I was so drunk I was blind the night before), but then I went to the bathroom and tried to take my contact lenses out - was there poking my eye and getting frustrated because eye was dry and therefore contact not moving sideways to come off and pouring OptiFree in my eyes and nothing - until I opened the case and saw my lenses neatly sitting in there and realised I was actually blind due to not having my eyes in, rather than due to being blind drunk still.
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snickerscharlie wrote: »Just remembered a recent "Duh" moment.
Made myself a coffee. Had my cellphone on the kitchen counter. Came back into the kitchen a few minutes later and saw the cream still on the counter. "Huh, thought I'd put that back in the fridge!" and proceeded to do so.
About an hour later, I couldn't find my cellphone. Looked everywhere for it. My daughter called it from her cell, and I could hear it ringing faintly from somewhere. It took her calling it about 4 or 5 times before I could zero in on its location, because everytime I got close, it would stop ringing, and it wasn't loud to begin with.
Yup, it was in the fridge.
That's because you knew it would get butter reception!
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I had my own just now. To make a new batch of my keto fat bombs, I frantically searched among the scraps of paper in my home, then among the hits of internet searches, then after pretending to remember how I did it I put all the ingredients in the bowl and only then updated my myfitnesspal recipe for my keto fat bombs.1
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DarkNightBrightDays wrote: »snickerscharlie wrote: »Just remembered a recent "Duh" moment.
Made myself a coffee. Had my cellphone on the kitchen counter. Came back into the kitchen a few minutes later and saw the cream still on the counter. "Huh, thought I'd put that back in the fridge!" and proceeded to do so.
About an hour later, I couldn't find my cellphone. Looked everywhere for it. My daughter called it from her cell, and I could hear it ringing faintly from somewhere. It took her calling it about 4 or 5 times before I could zero in on its location, because everytime I got close, it would stop ringing, and it wasn't loud to begin with.
Yup, it was in the fridge.
That's because you knew it would get butter reception!
Ice cream'd when I found it!4 -
bannock_and_biceps wrote: »a few days before my wedding, i threw out 200 dollars in the garbage.
i still haven't lived that down!
*and yes i had to go through the filth to get it. thank god it was in an envelope*
That reminds me of the time I thought I threw out my ID card that gets me into the building at work, and my friend and I went back to the restaurant, asked to search through the trash, blah blah blah, no luck...and later that day found the card in my jacket pocket. Doh!0 -
Yall, dont feel bad- I repeatedly try to open the front door of my house with my car's key fob 1
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