Fit For Future Families - August 2011

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  • godblessourhome
    godblessourhome Posts: 3,892 Member
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    AFM: My husband abruptly decided that he doesn't want to try right now. Which isn't really that much of an issue for me, except his reasoning is rather irritating to me. I got those prenatals and he saw them on the counter, and then he gets very upset with me because we hadn't made a decision one way or the other... He thought that I was making the decision for him, and also that taking prenatal vitamins somehow makes it easier for women to get pregnant. I've tried to explain that it doesn't relate to that at all, and it's just a precaution, and that all women in their childbearing years are recommended to take them, but no change. And that's great, because I am leaning the other way strongly. Ugh!

    ah, geez. boys can be so complicated, can't they? :( i will be praying for you.
  • godblessourhome
    godblessourhome Posts: 3,892 Member
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    my goals this week:
    get hubby and boys in to get measured (tuxes for my sister's wedding)
    get youngest in to dentist (visible cavity)
    make haircut appointment
    take all medication without forgetting
    increase water consumption (i've been slacking)
    eat reasonably during lunches out with friends
    get back in the habit of eating breakfast

    the extra estrogen is making me nauseous. it hasn't affected my hunger levels yet, but i know from past experience that it can. i wouldn't mind a decrease in appetite. my insurance turned down the progesterone gel that they wanted to prescribe, so i will be trying something different. that makes me nervous. and of course, i get to stew about it for the next two months. :)
  • lukimakamai
    lukimakamai Posts: 498 Member
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    Stephanie- Thanks! It is great to be back and get my butt back in gear. Being on MFP helps me be motivated to workout because only logging food sucks :laugh:

    Beth- I'm sorry! :flowerforyou: It sounds like he was just surprised to see the vitamins and wasn't sure what to make of it. I would take the vitamins from here on. You are right, they are good for you weather you are trying or not and doctors recommend taking folic acid at least three months prior to starting to ttc. That way when you decide as a couple it is time to ttc the vitamins will be in your system. Talk it over with him- maybe he has better reasons than that to want to wait or maybe he will realize he was being rash.
  • sdavisneill
    sdavisneill Posts: 115 Member
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    by the way stephanie, you are doing great with using everyone's real name!

    Thanks!! I had an initial list on a sticky note to learn most of the names & I have to look back through old posts every so often. We've had so many wonderful newbies though, so it is getting harder! :tongue:
  • kah78
    kah78 Posts: 391 Member
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    Pantera--sorry about the teeth. I had them completely knock me out when I got mine out, and I was on percocet for almost a week. (My family said I was very funny on Percocet.) But, other than not sleeping for 2 days after stopping the percocet, I was fine after that. I hope it just gets better for you!

    Yesterday I logged food for the first time in a WHILE. I hated doing it. But, getting back up on the saddle is always the hardest, and I need to---with the non-baby drama, it's been going way in the wrong direction. Way, way in the wrong direction. My motivation to exercise is still pretty non-existent, but I"m going back to basics and walked my 30 min this morning. If I can't get myself back under control, I'm going to have to look at something like WW. I just need a kick in the pants or something, and sometimes, paying for something does it for me. Haha. I actually realized that I was "sympathy eating for two". It was like,"Well, if I can't actually be pregnant, I'm going to pretend"--and then I pigged out. I told myself that if I can get myself back on track without paying for the help, then I get to keep the money I would have spent. :happy: We'll see.....

    I'm going through a "resignation phase" of an unsuccessful TTC battle. The war isn't over, but right now I feel like I'm just licking my wounds after getting my butt whomped. Right now I just don't feel like it's going to happen, and I've been reading all sorts of articles about how to raise an only child. I had to resist an urge to get rid of all the baby stuff I've kept from Josh's babyhood. I still want to try again next month, but this morning I realized, I think my head and heart are still just trying to recover, and it's really trying to wrap itself around this "new reality" of the real possibility of only one kid. I thought I has worked through the disappointment of the IUI not working, but I so have not, apparently. And why I feel this is such a travesty to only have one kid is really the part I struggle with the most. I am so blessed to have DS--but I just can't seem to let go of the guilt and grief of not having what I always thought was a given. I do believe in the power of prayer, but I find my prayers usually don't center on asking for another baby, but to help me to find peace with however this turns out, and to give me strength to keep going, and the wisdom to know when to stop in the meantime.

    Okay--enough philosophical ramblings. Feels good to get it out somehow though. thanks.
  • pixieofdoom
    pixieofdoom Posts: 356 Member
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    Big hugs Karen, glad you feel able to get some of it out. Thinking of you
  • godblessourhome
    godblessourhome Posts: 3,892 Member
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    I'm going through a "resignation phase" of an unsuccessful TTC battle. The war isn't over, but right now I feel like I'm just licking my wounds after getting my butt whomped. Right now I just don't feel like it's going to happen, and I've been reading all sorts of articles about how to raise an only child. I had to resist an urge to get rid of all the baby stuff I've kept from Josh's babyhood. I still want to try again next month, but this morning I realized, I think my head and heart are still just trying to recover, and it's really trying to wrap itself around this "new reality" of the real possibility of only one kid. I thought I has worked through the disappointment of the IUI not working, but I so have not, apparently. And why I feel this is such a travesty to only have one kid is really the part I struggle with the most. I am so blessed to have DS--but I just can't seem to let go of the guilt and grief of not having what I always thought was a given. I do believe in the power of prayer, but I find my prayers usually don't center on asking for another baby, but to help me to find peace with however this turns out, and to give me strength to keep going, and the wisdom to know when to stop in the meantime.

    i've been there with the ttc resignation. i also have tons of mama guilt, but mine is about trying to conceive when my kids are 8 and 9 (and would be 9 and 10 if i deliver in august 2012). i don't want their lives to be adversely affect by MY desires for a larger family, you know? either way, it is tough. hugs and praying for you.
  • msmitch
    msmitch Posts: 21
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    hey, hope you dont mind if i join in. Re-starting my weight loss journey. Both my husband & i are soooo ready to be parents. What's holding us back is my weight. I'm at 260 & want to drop a bunch before ttc. Hopefully this will help to get my butt in gear.
  • taldie01
    taldie01 Posts: 378
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    Karen, I understand the sympathy eating. Ive been on this path where I think hey I could be pregnant so I can eat what ever I want. Hugs to you

    Im supposed to get my period tomorrow. It better just come already. Ive taken a few tests and all neg. We timed it so right this month too. I seriously had myself convinced I was. Eating what I want :blushing: Why is it that some people just sneeze and they are pregnant. Everyone around me is pregnant. Grrrrr so frusterating what am I doing wrong. Wondering if DH should get his guys tested. Has anyone had thier husband lil guys tested? How does this procedure work?

    Just heading out for my lunch time walk take care ladies
  • batgirlrox
    batgirlrox Posts: 105
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    Good day all,

    Luki-Mostly my cheats involved carbs since I've been doing a physician monitored reduced carb diet so that's more what the "cheat" was for since carbs tend to up calories quite quickly.

    Steph- Thanks!

    KLMH-Great job on the weightloss for the week and super exciting about the ovulation regularity too. Hopefully that means you'll be prego in no time!

    Dawn-Thanks!

    Beth- Just give your DH a little bit to breathe. It's a very scary thought for some guys to think of losing their freedom and becoming fathers. I think they are also afraid of the "horror" stories of some girls "tricking" their significant other to get pregnant. Prenatals are recommended to get your folic acid levels up months before you start TTC anyways. Keep your chin up and let him relax a few days before bringing it up again maybe. Good luck any which way.

    MsMitch- Welcome!! Good luck on the losing weight battle first. It is soooooo much better for the babies if we get ourselves healthy first.

    Taldie- It's not uncommon to take 6 months-1 year to get pregnant (even doing everything right) once beginning to try so try stress yourself out about it yet. Temp tracking might help if you've been unsuccessful with it at first. Here is a good article that cleared up a lot of questions for me : http://www.ovulation-calendar.net/fertility-indicators/basal-body-temperature.php Just keep your chin up!

    AFM- I actually have all 4 of my days off this week and I'm very excited about it!! Weighed in this morning at my clinic and am down 5 pounds since last Monday(15th) and I'm stoked about it. It's also a very alkaline diet which is supposed to increase chances of conceiving. Other then that not much new with me although I do have a cute story which has nothing to do with TTC but thought I would share anyways:
    I have 2 (very different personalitied) dogs, a rotty shepard(Harley) who is 4 y/o and a pitbull lab(Rezzer) who is 1.5 years old. Rezzer is a totally "Momma's Boy" who really wont do anything much out of my sight but also has strong seperation anxiety if seperated from the other dog. Harley is much more laid back and doesn't particularly care what I'm doing. Well my front door has an issue with latching unless you slam it quite hard so when my roommate left this morning it didn't quite latch. So Rezzer begins his panicked freak out routine this morning for no apparent reason sitting at the top of the stairs. So he whines there for about 5 mins before I call him to see what his issue is. He comes down stairs to me and whines and paces and nudges for about 5 mins before I realize the other dog wasn't lounging around somewhere in his usual routine. So off I go to investigate the oh so urgent concern of Rezzer who whips up the stairs ahead of me and sits right in front of the open front door. I find Harley wandering around the front yard happy as a clam because he's found a way to get away from his "younger pesky brother." Who knew that even dog siblings tattled on each other?!? Hahaha Just another joy of parenthood I can look forward too ;) Hope everyone has a wonderful day! Babydust to all who want it and fat melting genies to those who want them first!
  • AlisaToth
    AlisaToth Posts: 415 Member
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    Happy happy Wednesday ladies!! It is officially ONE week until I get to see my husband!!! I cannot even express the amount of (not medically enduced) emotions I am feeling...nervous, excited, anxious, prepared, unprepared...and the list goes on!

    Congrats to those who lost this week - remember, even I'd it's not as much as you wanted to lose, a loss is a loss and the scale is moving in the right direction!!

    Batgirl - that is a cute story about ur pups! dogs are so much smarter than most pol give them credit for!

    Karen - hang in there - it'll happen! Thinking about you this month!!

    Taldie - fingers crossed that maybe it was too early for a BFP - I know when I got preggo w my son I was 5 1/2 weeks before it showed up on a HPT and they actually thought I was miscarrying bc my hormone leeks were so low

    AFM - yesterday was officially cd1 (had a bunch of heavy spotting on Monday but no really consistency so I'm not counting it) so round 1 of clomid starts tonight. I've decided to take the pills at night hoping that IF I have side effects I'll sleep thru them! Ahh I can't believe it's time to actually start all this stuff!!
    Also found out this morning that the hubs has to have his gallbladder removed when he gets home. It's been giving him a lit of problems off and on the past couple of years and it's only gotten worse so they will take it out probably the week after we get home from Hawaii. The only silver lining that we found was that because he'll be recovering and won't be Able go fly for 4-6 weeks after the surgery he wont have to go back out on the boat with the squadron in October with everyone else! So he'll be home until after the holidays!!
  • e_amanda
    e_amanda Posts: 19
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    Karen,

    I've done the "sympathy" eating for 2, and I've felt the same about my DS. So lucky to have him but at the same time that I'm failing him. He is so loving and has asked why we don't have a baby at our house several times. Just last month I was ready to sell the infant seat & stroller. If we don't get pregnant in the next 6 months the infant seat will be past the expiry date and useless by the time we had a baby, or it would be too late to sell and get any money back on it. We bought baby gear with the intention of it being used by 2/3 kids before we'd pass it on or sell it. My heart breaks just a little every time I see the crib dissassembled and tucked away under the bed in the "spare room" or any of the baby stuff we've got stashed around the house.

    (((HUGS))) All I can say is you need to spend the time to grieve what you don't have before you can get back to focusing on your health, weight and TTC again. We were forced into a 2-3 month break due to waiting for laparoscopy before cycling again. I am now so glad that we've had these few months. No fertility meds, no doctor's offices, not really caring when AF is due and agonizing over symptoms that are not really there (or are but are a result of prometrium) duing the 2WW. I think in the last week or two I have finally gotten my head back into a healthy space and will be ready to cycle again after the lap. One thing I have been doing lately, instead of focusing on the babies and pregnant mammas everywhere, I deliberately search out siblings that seem to have 3-5 year age gaps. I watch how they interact and how caring the older ones are towards the little ones and it makes me excited to have 4+ years between kids, if we are fortunate enough to ever have a second one.
  • newleafbeth11
    newleafbeth11 Posts: 45
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    Thanks everyone for the advice. I think you are all right and it just kind of threw him for a loop. Mostly, my irritation was a matter of pride for me (as in, how could he think that I would be that kind of woman, and how would that be "entrapment" anyway). But I will talk with him more in a week or two.

    Karen - That is hard stuff. I'm so sorry. But I will be keeping you in my prayers - both for undue mommy guilt (I have met lots of really great only's!) and for peace or help - one way or the other.

    GBOH - I am 7, 8 and 9 years older than my youngest three siblings, and growing up I was actually a lot closer to them than I was to my sister that is barely two years younger than me. Now I'm a bit closer to her, but that has more to do with the fact that 2 out of the youngest 3 are still in high school and their "rebellious years" are frustrating to me. I personally think that 4+ years in age difference can be a real positive for kids growing up. It also helped me learn a lot of responsibility because I was able to help take care of the "little ones" when they were babies/toddlers.
  • lukimakamai
    lukimakamai Posts: 498 Member
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    Karen- :flowerforyou: I’ve been there too! Before starting MFP I spent a couple months admiring my fat belly pretending it was a baby bump. Sounds so weird and eventually it lead me to this site :o) I have also gone through the whole “morning of lost children” phase. It is a totally normal and healthy phase, but I know it was very hard to explain my feelings to my husband and people that have never had problems TTC. They just kept saying. “don’t give up” or “it will happen” Neither are very helpful. So, I will say, I understand!

    MsMitch- WELCOME!

    Taldie- Yes, get the swimmers checked! It is awkward for them, but I figure if we can get all the painful tests taken they can *kitten* in a cup. Sorry not very compassionate, probably cause I’m arguing with my DH to get his checked again. Been trying to get him in for his ‘new’ check for 6 months and REALLY irritated that he is giving me such a hard time about it. Sorry for the mini vent.

    Batgirl- 5 pounds in a week WOWZER!!!

    Alisa- One more week! YES, SO EXCITED FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!

    AFM- I weighed in today and I’m down 1 pound. Very excited to see 130s again. Only 4 more pounds to my revised goal weight.
  • AlisaToth
    AlisaToth Posts: 415 Member
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    Just took my first clomid pill...is it strange that I started to cry when I was opening it? It felt like a cross between buyers remorse and excitement...I have so much going on and it is all starting to become real....freaking out a bit...
  • jalara
    jalara Posts: 2,622 Member
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    Hey ladies! I’m back!

    Taldie – I completely understand need to POAS (pee on a stick). I’m a pee-pusher for sure! Sorry for the BFN
    :flowerforyou:
    GBOH – Sorry AF showed during vacay, but hopefully it works out well for October!

    Megga – sorry about the cycle confusion!

    Pantera – Sorry the tooth extraction was so rough! Ensure is a very popular brand of meal replacement shake that is used in healthcare so you BF made a good choice! And I agree 100% that age affects us… we can’t say we weren’t warned though – but I never believed anyone when they told me.

    Kim – welcome back! So good to see you! It doesn’t matter how often we start over, just that we keep at it! Love the goals for the week! Happy anniversary! Enjoy Niagra!

    Amanda (Batgirl) – Congrats on the baptism!

    Beth – I know how it feels to be a weight target for doctors, it sucks – but that’s why I’m here! It sounds like you have great goals for the week! I’m sorry you had hubby are having trouble with the decision. Keep us posted!

    Honey – it sounds like you and your husband are a lot like we were when we first started trying. He wanted me to relax and I wanted to chart and know everything that was going on. Eventually I agreed to hide the details from him unless he asked and he agreed to just let me do I felt I needed to do. Nit was only a few months after that that he started taking an interest in my charting. I think it’s just a guy thing…

    Pam – OMG I am so so so happy for you! Hugs!!!!!!! Eeeeeeeeeekkkk!!!!

    Alisa – yay for seeing hubby! I know the circumstances aren’t ideal for him to stay home – but it’s great you’ll be able have him there for so long! I also take Clomid at night – it seems to work best for me.

    Karen – I’m glad the reunion wasn’t as bas as you thought it might be – it sounds like you handled it like a champ! What you said about “sympathy eating for two” – I completely get that and I don’te think I could have realized it if someone didn’t put it into words.
    I think it’s good that you are recognizing what you are feeling deep inside – so often we just try to shake things off and move on that we don’t take the time to actually FEEL our emotions. It sounds like you are aware of the possibilities surrounding you, which is good even if it doesn’t seem to be. Take your time and do what needs to be done for you (and DS and DH) in a healthy manner. It isn’t a race, no matter if it feels like one.

    Ashley – I’ll be stalking your posts!!! Stop in here anytime!

    Khaver – Congrats on the loss! You’re a rockstar!

    Marissa – welcome!

    Destiny – I’m sorry I can’t help you with the discharge question, but I hope you figure it out!

    Julia – yay for no more BC!!!

    Klm – congrats on the regular cycles and ovulation! And the loss too!

    Msmitch – welcome! Would you like to introduce yourself? If you look back a couple of pages you’ll see the details we about all of us. We’re one big family here!
  • jalara
    jalara Posts: 2,622 Member
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    AFM: We got back today (Wednesday) from Vegas. It was amazing! I'm not a fan of the weather AT ALL though. We left right before a heatwave hit, thank goodness!
    I had a bit of breakdown though because I had a hard time finding some food the first couple of days - being gluten free on vacation is not easy! At one point it was 36 hours without a decent meal (I had fruit and junkfood - the fruit I had bought at the airport and the junkfood was the only thing I could find). Eventually we figured it out and found a couple of really great places to eat, and we bought a cheap toaster and made toast in the mornings for breakfast.
    BUT - aside from that little snafoo it was wonderful! I cried when we went to see Garth Brooks - I have loved him since her came on the scene in 89 and his show was spectacular - just him and a guitar on a stage. Just awesome! We also saw Phantom of the Opera, the Las Vegas 51's baseball game (they're the minor league team for the Toronto Blue Jays which DH loves) and we spent a day at the Grand Canyon.
    Oh - and I love JCPenny! That place is amazing! We don't have one here, but I would recommend it to everyone!!!! I spent about $700 on clothes - yay for shopping!

    I have a 3k on Saturday and appointment at the clinic on Monday. Glad to be back!

    Edited to add: as an added bonus - we got a free upgrade on our flight home! Yahoo!
  • sdavisneill
    sdavisneill Posts: 115 Member
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    Welcome back Jalara! I'm so glad you had a wonderful trip despite the food thing. Vegas is so awesome. I'm not even much of a gambler, but I think it is the overabundance of the artificial fantasyland that just makes it intriguing to me. Like Disney for grown-ups. I have also always loved Garth Brooks too and that show sounds amazing. I think I remember you saying something about doing a vow renewal while you were there. Did you end up doing it?
  • kah78
    kah78 Posts: 391 Member
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    Jalara--so glad the trip was fun--i was thinking about you lots! I really had never thought about what life would be like without JCPenny...love that place too! They are closing the JCPenny Outlet near my house soon...I'm so sad.

    Alisa--SO EXCITED FOR YOU!! Yay! And yay for gallbladder surgery so he gets to stay home! (I had issues with mine during pregnancy--no fun!)

    For everyone: Thanks for the kind words. Yesterday was just one of those days where I sat down to "visit" with you all, and that's just what came out. I do tend to be pretty aware of emotions, etc--part of it is training, and part of it is just an exercise in self-awareness, but I understand how powerful they can be, so I try not to ignore them. Otherwise they just blow up at the most inopportune times. DS and I had a good day yesterday, so I got to enjoy some of the "benefits" of only having one child--and I tried to be mindful of it. Right now this doesn't feel like the life I've chosen (which is sorta ironic because with most of my life choices, I've been pretty relaxed about them), but I guess it's the life that has chosen me for the moment, so I need to make the best of it. I don't want to "miss" my son's childhood being focused on having another one.

    I'm trying to get back into the groove with the eating, exercising, etc. I'm not wanting to get up early to workout right now, and I don't like doing it at night--I never feel like I have the energy. I've decided to switch it up a bit by telling myself that if I exercise in the evening, then I get to "sleep in" the next day. So essentially, I'm exercising the night before for the next day. We'll see if the mental trick works--I love getting a good reward, and sleeping in is a great one for me. Eating is going better, but last night we had a family potluck and the control went AWOL. So today is a new day...we'll see how it goes.

    I found a quote yesterday that has stuck with me-- "Happiness is a form of courage." It resonated with me during all this TTC crud. Here's wishing you all happiness and courage for this journey, whether short or long.
  • KHaverstick
    KHaverstick Posts: 308 Member
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    Hey ladies! Quick check in. This has been a blah week for me, mostly because I think I've had a reaction to eating a bit of gluten. I have been eating gluten-free since January, and up until now I've been able to tolerate it in small amounts, but Monday night I was trying to get my little girl to eat something (with gluten in in, of course), and took the tiniest bite. Tuesday I woke up nauseated and with stomach cramps, and actually had to leave work. By mid-morning, I could barely stand up because of the pain. And all of this was on top of period cramps, bachache & bloating. Yesterday I still stayed home from work again, but I'm back in action today, and feeling better, but still not 100%. My best guess is that it was the gluten that caused the reaction. Definitely motivation NOT to eat it again! Also, my husband's cousin's daughter, who was 24, passed away this week. I didn't know her, but it was a sad, sad story (which I do not want to share here). But it was another reason for the blahs this week.

    Enough of the blah's though. I hope everyone is having a great week!

    Jalara--glad you guys had a good trip! Yeah, I can understand not liking the weather in Vegas in August, LOL. Glad you liked JCP...I love it, too! But for me it's pretty common-place, since we've had one here my whole life.

    Karen--I always enjoy reading your posts. You are such a great communicator, and you put so much emotion and detail into describing things. Side note: I once joined WW Online because I got to the point where I was frustrated with myself for not losing, and felt like paying the $15/month would keep me accountable. I did for quite a while, and then life got busy and I quit. When I decided to start back up, I never could get back into it, and that's when I found MFP. But I hear you about the whole paying for something so that you'll actually stick to it!

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