When a man cheats, is it the woman's fault?

Well, I don't see any reason he couldn't have broken it off before cheating. And anyway, even if she hadn't been awful to him, it's not possible to answer your question because every marriage is different, isn't it? Some people cheat on others out of compulsion or poor impulse control or any number of reasons, not just because they're not treated well. So "is it the woman's fault" isn't a question that can be answered yes resolutely unless that's followed with "because she should do anything to keep her husband from straying" which is just kind of blatantly sexist and outdated. *Sometimes* it's probably the wife's fault a husband feels he *wants* to cheat; however, that still doesn't mean he should. If he's going to, he might as well just propose a divorce beforehand. Same outcome, after all.

oh boy is that a tricky subject.

There is no real justification for cheating. If you're not happy in a relationship then you need to break if off before moving on or work at making your current relationship a good one.

but you're friend can't honestly be surprised he went and found what he was looking for in someone else when she treated him that bad, seriously?

See, that's what we all said! I felt bad for her, but what did she expect?

I do not condone cheating on your spouse EVER. However, I do "understand" it in situations such as this. I have this same viewpoint. If she withheld sex, she shouldn't be surprised that he went looking for it somewhere else. If that makes it "her" fault in your mind then, so be it.

Wow yeah, tricky subject. I think there's so many factors that go into this, it's not a black and white situation. My first instinct is to say that if he was that unhappy he should have left. BUT...we don't know the rest of the story. I had a friend who was going through the same thing with his wife. He felt that he couldn't leave because he was afraid she would run off with his kids. So he cheated. In his case, yes I did have sympathy for him. I felt that if she treated him better he wouldn't have cheated and I felt that it was her fault as much as it was his. I have no sympathy for a man that has a great wife and cheats just to cheat (or vice versa). If a person has tried everything possible with their spouse to make things better and it hasn't worked, and cannot leave for some reason, then yes I think there are two parties at fault.

regardless of how she acted or treated him, it was not her fault he cheated. If anything, he should have sat her down and explained how that was making him feel, then if that didn't show any results, LEAVE her, then have lots of crazy sex with everyone, not cheat on her.

This.

Everyone makes their own choices. He chose to cheat. She was wrong for treating him like crap, but that is a different topic. He should have left.

Whean a man cheats, is it the woman's fault? NO! The man was responsible for his own actions. If his wife was treating him that badly, they should have tried to work things out somehow and if they couldn't then get a divorce. There's never any excuse for cheating! I wonder, was the phrase "for better or for worse" a part of their wedding vows?

It takes two people to wreck a marriage. Sounds like she wasn't a great wife, for whatever reason. Cheating is never okay.

It is never anyone's fault, no one can make you cheat.
Having been cheated on and done some cheating of my own,
I find it is passive aggressive behavior.
I prefer a man who can tell me what he wants, even if that is another woman.
I prefer the ability to make my own decision.

It depends,...did she cook and clean around the house for him prior to it happening?

NICE! LOL! I love reading all the male perspectives :laugh:

No relationship problem is ever solved by putting your p*nis in someone else. Likewise, no relationship problem is ever solved by putting yourself on another's p*nis. It's really that simple. If you can't stand the way things are - leave.:grumble:

"It was an accident"

Yes, I understand you accidentally fell on his erect ****.