I Dated The Above and Ended Up...

Barbecuing ribs with her..in the flames of eternal torment

Alphabetizing her Soul Collection

I still cant remember.....

Waking up every morning with her staring at me, then asking "Do you know who you are? Do you know where you are?"

Hitched! ...to a post... in her basement

Putting mine on speed dial 😝

Going for walks on the beach daily.

With sand in places I didn't even know I had

With whip welts on my back

North Pole how the hell that just happened

Having dresses for all the occasions! Two closets full!!😳

Dressing down then having pancakes

Skipping and singing show tunes everywhere I went.

Getting the royal treatment I deserve.

It would start out well but over time wed grow distant (he was always out saving something or the other). Eventually I'd become the opposite of him, Bizarro, and wed clash again and again, until we either bonded or only one was left standing.