A question for men...girls can give opinion too! :D

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  • ArroganceInStep
    ArroganceInStep Posts: 6,239 Member
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    Looks do play a role in attraction, but it's not everything. I'm not saying you're like this, but a lot of women that I know who have a poor self image (attractive or not) end up comparing themselves to others. That puts a negative overtone on any interactions you may have with them. I dated a girl like that in college (well a few, but one in particular). I thought she was quite attractive myself, but she was VERY self-conscious. I often found myself exhausted just trying to convince her that she was decent looking, let alone beautiful. I know a lot of people, women in particular, who are like that. That attitude also often resulted in those folks hanging out with more negative or superficial people that only reinforced their behavior, it's a vicious cycle.

    My advice to you is to stop worrying so much about what guys want, if it's some skinny model b**** or whatever. Just be yourself. Surround yourself with people that make you happy, do the things you like doing, and care about the things you care about. However, you still want to be open to other ideas, new things, and meeting different people. Basically: be the cool chick. In the long run that'll get you further than looks with the right people.

    I'm not going to bash you about you beliefs regarding men liking a particular type of woman. There are plenty of very superficial people out there, and many are part of the dating scene (coincidence? I think not!) But not everyone is like that. I went through my goo-goo for anything with a nice pair of legs and a huge rack phase, but I grew out of it. My fiance is very beautiful, but she's nothing like the girls I used to hang out with in college. There are decent, mature, nice guys out there...you just have to find them. Dating can be brutal, if it weren't, everyone would already be tied down already!
  • Aliwoo1982
    Aliwoo1982 Posts: 7 Member
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    I've always had curves, even when I was much smaller. Never had a problem with men. Get yourself together and stop looking, they will come. I always say, "You have to kiss a couple of frogs before you get to your prince." Good things come to those who wait. :smile:

    I say kiss as many frogs as possible. Just don't let any of them move in or anything crazy like that.

    my mum used to say

    "you gotta lay alot of *kitten* to get good roses"
  • PJilly
    PJilly Posts: 21,660 Member
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    My honest opinion
    I prefer a woman to be curvy....I would prefer not to be able to check for a fractured bone without an x-ray, LOL. But on the flip side, I prefer her to also be healthy so we can enjoy a healthy lifestyle together. After all, who else to enjoy a healthy lifestyle than your partner ??!!

    Yes sir! You can still be healthy and at a normal body weight and still have curves!

    No kidding! I seriously hate when people describe overweight as "curvy."

    I'm an hourglass. No matter what I weigh, I have hips and boobs and am curvy -- at 200 pounds or 90 pounds, thank you very much. (Not that I'll ever be -- or want to be -- 90 pounds, but you get my point.)
    And, conversely, not all overweight women have curves. I have narrow hips, and they're narrow when I'm lean and when I'm fat. The only time I've ever felt remotely curvy was when was pregnant and looked like I had a giant, curvy beachball stuffed under my shirt!
  • jamesdelong
    jamesdelong Posts: 177 Member
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    Does your ComicCon loving woman dress up? I really wanted to go to ComicCon this year, but my boyfriend was worried that pictures of me dressed as Sailor Moon would end up all over the internet, so we passed. I told him that maybe if I dressed as Wonder Woman I'd end up on fewer websites, but he's not convinced.

    He would be correct. At SDCC this year, my husband was snapping pics of all the ones dressed as Wonder Woman. He did not snap one pic of a Sailor Moon girl. He also asked that when I get to a weight I'm comfortable at, I dress was Wonder Woman. Not sure that's gonna happen. :laugh:

    lol - didn't realize anyone would pick up my comic con remark!

    I think it's great to have things like this in common and no my ex never dressed up in public ;)

    @jensvens - You'll find that person soon enough. For me it's best when it happens naturally. Don't get a partner just to have one. I found a great friend first that eventually become a person I grew to love. (no longer together but still good friends and size obviously didn't matter to her because I have always been a hefty guy)
  • hazelnutflav
    hazelnutflav Posts: 391 Member
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    i would not take it to heart maybe the "skinny girl" is giving him what he wants and you never really know what he is thinking so dont blame it on your weight, also he may not want a relationship or a woman who is divorced with kids, maybe he does not want that responsability, if he sees a skinny girl and likes her instead.... Does anyone really know why? no not really.

    he might just want her for sex, a trophy, someone to buy him dinner, or give him a place to sleep, at any rate he will get what he asked for and that maybe the best thing that ever happened to YOU.

    also keep in mind there is a big difference between GIRLS AND WOMEN, you are a woman for sure because you are not willing to settle for anyone less than a man you feel is worthy of you, so keep searching there a plenty of fish in the sea and you will find your man eventually.
  • calderst
    calderst Posts: 222 Member
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    I've never been heavy but when I got close to my goal weight, my husband started stocking the fridge with all my favorite foods. He desires me as I am but I don't think he'd mind if I regained a little more of my curviness.

    Even though I'm only about 14 pounds less, I also get hit on less-- which is ok with both the hubby and me. :)
  • Huffdogg
    Huffdogg Posts: 1,934 Member
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    curves ftw. Gimme healthy any day.
  • dhayeskc
    dhayeskc Posts: 9
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    The amount of weight between the ears is what matters most...if you're self-centered, that b word, or simply a little vacant, well no one's going to want to stay around long. Any sane guy would take a curvy woman he can bond with over a *****y model wannabee. Someone else offered good advice. Be yourself...unless you're that person Henny Youngman was talking about: "You have a nice personality...but not for a human being."
  • marktaunton
    marktaunton Posts: 8
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    Give me a 16/18 with the boobs to go with that, and I am in heaven. Give me a 16/18 with no boobs then nah just does not look right.

    For me skinny girls do not appeal to me so much, their backsides do tend to look better in jeans though.

    At the end of the day really it all comes down to personal taste, and also personality, so this is a 50/50 question to ask.
  • IDoIt73
    IDoIt73 Posts: 22 Member
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    You are so damn beautiful.....
  • PhoenixRising17
    PhoenixRising17 Posts: 134 Member
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    I think you are absolutely GORGEOUS and any guy that has a problem with some extra cushion needs to have his head examined you are beautiful! and i totally agree with you that guys are stupid for always going for the skinny dumb airhead types but honestly if thats all they care about then they probably aren't worth your time anyway...dont give up girly you will find someone that deserves you one day! I wish you much luck and success in your weight loss journey!!!! =)
  • Iamfit4life
    Iamfit4life Posts: 3,095 Member
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    skinny girls" that are air-headed, *****y


    Attitude maybe?
  • GymRatRaceRunner
    GymRatRaceRunner Posts: 160 Member
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    Every man has a unique opinion - asking if they all like skinny or curvy is like asking them what their favorite color is...
    black
  • PJilly
    PJilly Posts: 21,660 Member
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    I was so much nicer and smarter when I weighed 25-30 pounds more. :noway:
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    I think you are absolutely GORGEOUS and any guy that has a problem with some extra cushion needs to have his head examined you are beautiful! and i totally agree with you that guys are stupid for always going for the skinny dumb airhead types but honestly if thats all they care about then they probably aren't worth your time anyway...dont give up girly you will find someone that deserves you one day! I wish you much luck and success in your weight loss journey!!!! =)

    So, all the overweight women here who are trying to lose weight are going to suddenly be dumb airheads when they get thin?
  • Iamfit4life
    Iamfit4life Posts: 3,095 Member
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    I think you are absolutely GORGEOUS and any guy that has a problem with some extra cushion needs to have his head examined you are beautiful! and i totally agree with you that guys are stupid for always going for the skinny dumb airhead types but honestly if thats all they care about then they probably aren't worth your time anyway...dont give up girly you will find someone that deserves you one day! I wish you much luck and success in your weight loss journey!!!! =)

    So, all the overweight women here who are trying to lose weight are going to suddenly be dumb airheads when they get thin?

    Clearly
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    I think you are absolutely GORGEOUS and any guy that has a problem with some extra cushion needs to have his head examined you are beautiful! and i totally agree with you that guys are stupid for always going for the skinny dumb airhead types but honestly if thats all they care about then they probably aren't worth your time anyway...dont give up girly you will find someone that deserves you one day! I wish you much luck and success in your weight loss journey!!!! =)

    So, all the overweight women here who are trying to lose weight are going to suddenly be dumb airheads when they get thin?

    Clearly

    Can you imagine if someone came on here and said he or she couldn't understand how any man could possibly be interested in an overweight woman?
  • BrettPGH
    BrettPGH Posts: 4,720 Member
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    Any women who constantly insult "skinny b!tches" are ugly enough inside that I don't really care what they weigh.
  • swordsmith
    swordsmith Posts: 599 Member
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    Every man has a unique opinion - asking if they all like skinny or curvy is like asking them what their favorite color is...

    My favorite color is plaid...

    But to answer the question- I like curvy girls. Sticks hold zero appeal for me- and air headed stick even less. I like a woman who can think and hold her own in an "adult" conversation (i.e. ones not involving shopping or squealing over someone likeing their FB post of a pink hamster)
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    Every man has a unique opinion - asking if they all like skinny or curvy is like asking them what their favorite color is...

    My favorite color is plaid...

    But to answer the question- I like curvy girls. Sticks hold zero appeal for me- and air headed stick even less. I like a woman who can think and hold her own in an "adult" conversation (i.e. ones not involving shopping or squealing over someone likeing their FB post of a pink hamster)

    Some of us thin girls can hold our own in adult conversations. Just sayin'.

    And you can be thin and curvy.

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