Do you wish: your significant other worked out!?
Replies
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I do wish he worked out or was at least active. He is 10 years older than me and has some injuries and health issues that would be immensely helped by a more active lifestyle. I plan to live a long, active life, and I want him to be around for it! I dont nag him about it, though. I do my thing and he does his.2
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msalicia07 wrote: »how do you feel about your significant other working out or do you wish they did? Alot of times I see ppl who workout and their partner doesn't. Are you OK with that or do you wish that could change? Are you more attracted to someone who works out or does it not matter?
My husband can be fit/healthy without working out. Working out is not for everyone. He should do what he enjoys doing for his health. Not something I or social media tells him to do because it’s my hobby or it’s popular. If he prefers to eat his TDEE and read on his spare time why would this bother me?
Hopefully he gets some physical activity or unfortunately he or any will most likely not be healthy.3 -
Theoldguy1 wrote: »msalicia07 wrote: »how do you feel about your significant other working out or do you wish they did? Alot of times I see ppl who workout and their partner doesn't. Are you OK with that or do you wish that could change? Are you more attracted to someone who works out or does it not matter?
My husband can be fit/healthy without working out. Working out is not for everyone. He should do what he enjoys doing for his health. Not something I or social media tells him to do because it’s my hobby or it’s popular. If he prefers to eat his TDEE and read on his spare time why would this bother me?
Hopefully he gets some physical activity or unfortunately he or any will most likely not be healthy.
“He should do what he enjoys doing for his health” covers that. Activity doesn’t have to be in the gym, that’s the point I’m making. Some people stay in shape being active, others play sports, hike, hunt, dance, work in a busy atmosphere. So the “working out” part is completely unnecessary unless it’s something they want to do. Makes no difference to me.2 -
Grace_spaceship wrote: »My partner and I both workout and are generally active people. We rarely workout together. We might show up to the gym together but we go do our own thing. We do a lot of hiking and walking together and other activities.
This. Absolutely this.
We spend quite a lot of time doing our own exercise at the same time in the same place.1 -
If by work out you mean do sport, then yes, because he loves it. And he's good at it. But he's a shift worker and uses that as an excuse to not do any exercise at all. It's a shame because I know that he enjoys it but he can't seem to find a way of fitting something in around his work.0
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Yep it's important to me, I'll say it. Before we had kids we used to go to the gym together and whilst we did our own thing once we got there, it was nice to have someone to spot for me or to do heavy lifts with. Looking after myself is important, not just because I want to look reasonable for my age, but because of the the health benefits. I use it to manage stress and I tend to think everyone is better off for doing exercise in some shape or form, it's a 'no-brainer' if you think about it. Therefore I am glad that my husband does exercise in some shape or form. I have dated people who don't look after themselves, I don't think I would want to go back to that. Not because it's the most important thing in life, but because obviously we only have one body, and whilst obsessing about it won't save anyone, we can hope to live a longer, more active life - hopefully with someone we love.
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he's a grown man...i'm not his keeper2
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I like when we go for walks together. But for the most part, working out w/ my SO is not 'ideal'. For now: I'm more fit and he is just getting restarted (maybe) so if I walk with him, its for the companionship and to encourage him. Not a great 'workout' for me. I want him to be healthy, so in that respect I want him to take care of himself.
But I don't really want him to workout with me. It would limit me.1 -
msalicia07 wrote: »Theoldguy1 wrote: »msalicia07 wrote: »how do you feel about your significant other working out or do you wish they did? Alot of times I see ppl who workout and their partner doesn't. Are you OK with that or do you wish that could change? Are you more attracted to someone who works out or does it not matter?
My husband can be fit/healthy without working out. Working out is not for everyone. He should do what he enjoys doing for his health. Not something I or social media tells him to do because it’s my hobby or it’s popular. If he prefers to eat his TDEE and read on his spare time why would this bother me?
Hopefully he gets some physical activity or unfortunately he or any will most likely not be healthy.
“He should do what he enjoys doing for his health” covers that. Activity doesn’t have to be in the gym, that’s the point I’m making. Some people stay in shape being active, others play sports, hike, hunt, dance, work in a busy atmosphere. So the “working out” part is completely unnecessary unless it’s something they want to do. Makes no difference to me.
As an FYI hunting does absolutely nothing to help anyone stay in shape lol.1 -
I just want her to be as healthy as she can be and weight is just a part of that equation. I had to sit her down this year and actually ask her to not workout so much!
She had Fibromyalgia so bad around 6 years ago she literally couldn't do anything. We changed all of our eating habits and found Holistic/Integrative Health practitioners that helped. Along with our complete change of diet, supplements, exercise and chemicals, her health turned around to the point where she was working out six days a week. But I could tell her body wasn't recovering.
My daughter and I sat her down and said, look, you don't have to workout six days a week. She now works out 3 days a week -- longer workout times -- and allows her body to recover the next day. She's doing much better as a result. She (and I) have both put on around 5 pounds through Covid-19, but that's not a big deal. We're both tightening up the diet more to help with that.
She looks great at any weight to me. I don't. I guess if you're concerned about health, that's a legit reason to be concerned if someone doesn't do anything.1 -
We have different styles. I like a structured program with times, amount of days etc. He doesn’t workout in the traditional sense but keeps himself active/fit. His job used to be quite physical but as he’s moved up the food chain it’s become less so. He doesn’t let that make him lazy. While other guys in his position take the golf cart for rounds or have someone lower on the totem pole turning wrenches, he walks the plant and turns the wrenches himself. They think he’s crazy, lol. In 32 years together he’s belonged to a gym once. After a week or two I could tell he was only doing it for me. Just like he’s accepted that I am not a camping/boating/fishing/hiking person I accept he’s not a gym person (he did use the crap out of the racquet ball court though.) I give him a pass on traditional workouts and he gives me a pass on the great outdoors. He’s proof you can remain physically fit without ever stepping into a gym.
All of that said, there was a time that I was obese and he never pressured me about it. There have been times where he’s had a little paunch and I didn’t say a word. I think we both realized that each of us had to get there on our own and in our own way.1 -
midlomel1971 wrote: »he's a grown man...i'm not his keeper
oh I busted out laughing reading that1 -
Dogmom1978 wrote: »msalicia07 wrote: »Theoldguy1 wrote: »msalicia07 wrote: »how do you feel about your significant other working out or do you wish they did? Alot of times I see ppl who workout and their partner doesn't. Are you OK with that or do you wish that could change? Are you more attracted to someone who works out or does it not matter?
My husband can be fit/healthy without working out. Working out is not for everyone. He should do what he enjoys doing for his health. Not something I or social media tells him to do because it’s my hobby or it’s popular. If he prefers to eat his TDEE and read on his spare time why would this bother me?
Hopefully he gets some physical activity or unfortunately he or any will most likely not be healthy.
“He should do what he enjoys doing for his health” covers that. Activity doesn’t have to be in the gym, that’s the point I’m making. Some people stay in shape being active, others play sports, hike, hunt, dance, work in a busy atmosphere. So the “working out” part is completely unnecessary unless it’s something they want to do. Makes no difference to me.
As an FYI hunting does absolutely nothing to help anyone stay in shape lol.
I’m from Montana. This is a big reason why we are typically in good health and shape. It is incredibly hard. I’m sure in others places that may not be the case.3 -
My husband prefers running to lifting, which is fine with me. I both wish he ran more often (he runs once or twice a week. he’s very slim, so not for aesthetics, but I want him to stay healthy as we head into our 40s), and am okay with him not, but that’s purely selfish—we have 12+ practices/games per week for our kids and their sports (usually in evenings). I work out or at least walk an hour a day, every day (usually in the am). If he started putting in significant extra running time, that would be more crunch time for the evenings, since I don’t think waking up before 5 to run and then be at work by 5:45 is going to happen. So selfishly, I’m good w status quo.1
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claireychn074 wrote: »For me it’s actually whether my SO can cope with my exercise. It’s a huge part of my life and eats a reasonable amount of my spare time so he has to be okay with that. But then again I’m an absolute nightmare if I can’t get my endorphin high! Because I like to be active i would struggle to be with someone who was a coach potato, but probably not as much as they’d struggle to cope with me obsessing over weightlifting technique.
Yes, exactly! He has to put up w me scheduling workouts into our weekends or when we stay w family, when it would be much easier to just hang out and skip the workout logistics. But he puts up w all of that, plus my boring him to death w workout/progress talk, and pays for my constant succession of injury-related PT, X-rays, etc as I try to pretend I’m invincible without rolling his eyes and saying “I told you so” (not that he ever would!).1 -
Yes...Yes. I. Do.1
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I don't care if my partner doesn't work out. I don't expect her to be doing many hours a year of exercise since I have not worked out every year since the age of 12 or whatever.0
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My wife has always been physically active and extremely attractive. Multiple large baby pregnancies had a cost she was willing to pay. However Ab work is no longer a possibility and legs ache from the veins. She does what she can. My love for her is not based on her outward appearance. However her self image has taken a blow and it has been challenge for her to watch my transition.
That sounds really tough for your wife. I wonder if she knows about the post partum workouts and that Amy at BodyFit has put together? Amy has had two babies, with associated abs issues (she writes: "I am a C-section mama, a VBAC mama, and experienced Diastasis Recti with my second, so my workouts include modifications and options no matter where you are in your journey." These seem to me very good (I have nevery had a baby, but there are lots of post partum women in the facebook group who say that they are excellent programmes. They might appeal to your wife (assuming she is allowed to exercise)?
Amy's website: https://bodyfitbyamy.com/babyfit/
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For myself, I love working out on my own but wish my husband would get moving too. I would give up the pleasure of choosing what I want to do and when i want to do it to be doing this together. He is miles better than he was a few years ago, and we have adjusted our diets so he is no longer overweight (in fact he weighs a good bit less than I do; we are the same height and same age). We managed a few walks this summer before it got too hot, and he is tired alarmingly quickly. I really worry that he is not getting enough exercise to keep healthy.
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I wish my husband or one of my kids would exercise with me, but they don’t. I’ve gotten used to it. In fact, I enjoy the quiet time without anyone ‘in my space’.
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My significant other can do whatever they want. I don't need to wish for it or not. If you are wishing, then you're asking them to change and people are who they are. If they want to change for the better, they will on their own. As for being more attracted to people that exercise, that's a yes for me. Because I know what it takes to do it. But you just can't be attracted to someone. Having a relationship just isn't about attraction.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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I run 5 miles per day averaging 45 minutes to an hour and then I literally sit the rest of the day. That's the only exercise I get and then I have to sit at work most of the day.
My girlfriends job consists of a lot of walking so she does not work out much. Usually I have way more energy at the end of my work day but quite the opposite for her which is understandable. It would bother me if she got no exercise at all. We all know the benefits of exercising but we are becoming so lazy as a society that some people have never even made attempt at it.
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At times my partner has worked out and I haven’t. Right now I go to the gym and he doesn’t. He has been having us go for a family walk 3-4 times a week, where he pushes our daughters wheelchair (because it makes it more like exercise in his mind). I’m not always wanting to go for a walk but I do it to support him, he watches the kiddo so I can work out with my PT.
I will always be supportive of him doing things to improve his health, but it isn’t up to me. My love for him isn’t conditional.1 -
msalicia07 wrote: »Dogmom1978 wrote: »msalicia07 wrote: »Theoldguy1 wrote: »msalicia07 wrote: »how do you feel about your significant other working out or do you wish they did? Alot of times I see ppl who workout and their partner doesn't. Are you OK with that or do you wish that could change? Are you more attracted to someone who works out or does it not matter?
My husband can be fit/healthy without working out. Working out is not for everyone. He should do what he enjoys doing for his health. Not something I or social media tells him to do because it’s my hobby or it’s popular. If he prefers to eat his TDEE and read on his spare time why would this bother me?
Hopefully he gets some physical activity or unfortunately he or any will most likely not be healthy.
“He should do what he enjoys doing for his health” covers that. Activity doesn’t have to be in the gym, that’s the point I’m making. Some people stay in shape being active, others play sports, hike, hunt, dance, work in a busy atmosphere. So the “working out” part is completely unnecessary unless it’s something they want to do. Makes no difference to me.
As an FYI hunting does absolutely nothing to help anyone stay in shape lol.
I’m from Montana. This is a big reason why we are typically in good health and shape. It is incredibly hard. I’m sure in others places that may not be the case.
Here hunting is confined to a 6 or 8 week season out of the year and usually involves lots of beer and convenience foods, driving around on an ATV, and sitting very very still in a blind (or tree stand) for hours on end. It's definitely not a fitness activity.
The SO doesn't work out although he has had sporadic bursts of using the treadmill that someone gave him. His cholesterol levels are almost to the point where he needs medication and he has a lot of back trouble, losing the extra 60 or so pounds he's carrying would probably help a lot. Several years ago he had me create an account on here for him, didn't like the amount of food he got for the allotted calories, and had a habit of choosing the lowest-calorie database entries for things, plus grossly underestimating quantities. He did manage to lose 20 pounds but I'm sure it's all back on now. He needs to want to lose it for his own benefit in order for the tools to actually help him.0 -
I have exercise induced anaphylaxis, it appeared along with other significant medical issues shortly after the birth of my youngest child 8 years ago. I still like to keep as active as possible and predominantly control my weight through food alone, since it’s the item I can most control.
My husband has no significant medical issues, does little to no planned exercise and thinks his job will keep off his weight, lockdown for us proved that he typically eats as much as he burns, however he’s maybe 10kg overweight. He tried an account on here but merely worked based on the database rather than weighing anything. I’d love for him to workout more, he’s previously learnt and taught Kung fu but he’d rather play video games now0 -
msalicia07 wrote: »Dogmom1978 wrote: »msalicia07 wrote: »Theoldguy1 wrote: »msalicia07 wrote: »how do you feel about your significant other working out or do you wish they did? Alot of times I see ppl who workout and their partner doesn't. Are you OK with that or do you wish that could change? Are you more attracted to someone who works out or does it not matter?
My husband can be fit/healthy without working out. Working out is not for everyone. He should do what he enjoys doing for his health. Not something I or social media tells him to do because it’s my hobby or it’s popular. If he prefers to eat his TDEE and read on his spare time why would this bother me?
Hopefully he gets some physical activity or unfortunately he or any will most likely not be healthy.
“He should do what he enjoys doing for his health” covers that. Activity doesn’t have to be in the gym, that’s the point I’m making. Some people stay in shape being active, others play sports, hike, hunt, dance, work in a busy atmosphere. So the “working out” part is completely unnecessary unless it’s something they want to do. Makes no difference to me.
As an FYI hunting does absolutely nothing to help anyone stay in shape lol.
I’m from Montana. This is a big reason why we are typically in good health and shape. It is incredibly hard. I’m sure in others places that may not be the case.
Here hunting is confined to a 6 or 8 week season out of the year and usually involves lots of beer and convenience foods, driving around on an ATV, and sitting very very still in a blind (or tree stand) for hours on end. It's definitely not a fitness activity.
The SO doesn't work out although he has had sporadic bursts of using the treadmill that someone gave him. His cholesterol levels are almost to the point where he needs medication and he has a lot of back trouble, losing the extra 60 or so pounds he's carrying would probably help a lot. Several years ago he had me create an account on here for him, didn't like the amount of food he got for the allotted calories, and had a habit of choosing the lowest-calorie database entries for things, plus grossly underestimating quantities. He did manage to lose 20 pounds but I'm sure it's all back on now. He needs to want to lose it for his own benefit in order for the tools to actually help him.
Cool, sounds like fun! We hunt for our meat for the year. In the mountains in drastic elevations typically. After we hunt we follow game to see where they bed. Cohabit. Where they will come back the following year. Where they shed. This is hunting for most hunters in most states. This is how many of us survive, recreate, and is also a part of our culture which is passed down. But if you have the luxury of drinking and taking a doe down from your vehicle, okay then. My post literally just mentioned hunting as one of the many ways to stay active. If it doesn’t apply to you, that’s perfectly fine too.1 -
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