WTF?!?! Personal question - opinions welcome!

omg, I thought it was just me...

I am EXTREMELY sexual, but my husband could almost care less about getting it on as much as I would like to. I too have gone months, and before, I used to ask, but after getting turned down a few times, I got over that and tried to wait it out. Eff that. I became very pissy and bratty, because I felt less than desirable.

Turns out he has some "man" issues that we have to deal with and he now has to take testosterone injections. Even though I know what it is now, it still makes me pissy and bratty when its been a while. I can't help it. I'm really pissy and bratty right now. Its been almost 3 weeks now... *sigh*

So, I feel your pain.... *hugs*

Wait.... Huh.... What??? :noway: MONTHS?????? :noway: I am so naive, I had no clue the problem with some dudes was this serious!!!

my bad, it has been a month here and there, but happened over and over. He would do it to make me happy.

Whew! ok, thats not as bad.... still a month is bad, .... good luck to you too!! :frown:

I guess you could talk to him and ask him why he's not attracted to you.......

omg, I thought it was just me...

I am EXTREMELY sexual, but my husband could almost care less about getting it on as much as I would like to. I too have gone months, and before, I used to ask, but after getting turned down a few times, I got over that and tried to wait it out. Eff that. I became very pissy and bratty, because I felt less than desirable.

Turns out he has some "man" issues that we have to deal with and he now has to take testosterone injections. Even though I know what it is now, it still makes me pissy and bratty when its been a while. I can't help it. I'm really pissy and bratty right now. Its been almost 3 weeks now... *sigh*

So, I feel your pain.... *hugs*

Wait.... Huh.... What??? :noway: MONTHS?????? :noway: I am so naive, I had no clue the problem with some dudes was this serious!!!

my bad, it has been a month here and there, but happened over and over. He would do it to make me happy.

Whew! ok, thats not as bad.... still a month is bad, .... good luck to you too!! :frown:

it is still bad, but at least he took the initiative to get it checked out, because as a male in his mid 30's, he was rather concerned that he wasn't all that interested, too.

I guess you could talk to him and ask him why he's not attracted to you.......

wow, did you want to kick her again while she's down? You are old enough to know how incredibly rude that was. It is not always about attraction.

A few of the posts that I've read here mentioned that it could be a medical/psychological issue. I have to say that this is something well worth looking into. Couples counseling, or individual counselling, can be a huge help and don't be afraid to bring up the subject of anti-depressants. A-D's saved my life and my marriage, but it can be difficult for men to admit to depression.

Iit is nice to know, but I do know what his issue is, so I feel really selfish when I act bratty, not to mention I ask when I want it, which is usually later in the evening after he's alrady taken his sleeping meds. But, hey, I want it when I want it... lol

After he takes his sleep meds? I was going to suggest that it could be a control issue but then I read this! You need to jump on it (so to speak) earlier!!!!

I agree with several people that he prolly has low testosterone and needs to see a doctor. My husband has a similar problem, where he is just not interested. I'm the same as you tho, I love sex and could do it every day! When we have had problems with this issue, I stopped asking ans started "taking care of myself." If you really want to get your message across, do it with him in the bed! My husband wasn't able to just lay there without getting involved!

He can. I do it loudly too! :blushing:

There are times when I try, and he rolls over, pushes my hand away, etc. :huh:

Been there once, too...nothing.

Iit is nice to know, but I do know what his issue is, so I feel really selfish when I act bratty, not to mention I ask when I want it, which is usually later in the evening after he's alrady taken his sleeping meds. But, hey, I want it when I want it... lol

After he takes his sleep meds? I was going to suggest that it could be a control issue but then I read this! You need to jump on it (so to speak) earlier!!!!

Ya, I don't really know when he takes all his slew of anti-depressants, testosterone injection, heart pills, blood pressure pills, or his sleeping pills. I guess I could pay more attention and try to schedule my desire for a more desirable time to want it, lol.

Usually, if someone doesn't want to have sex, it's because they don't feel sexy.

It probably has less to do with how he feels about you and much more to do with how he feels about himself.

I completely agree with this! Normally with my marriage he's the one always wanting and I'm the one turning him down. At one point the tables turned and I couldn't understand why he was turning me down. I even accused him of getting it elsewhere! He finally broke down and told me that I was losing weight and looking good and he still felt unsexy and fat and gross. So I started complimenting him more, grabbing his backside, or frontside :blushing: and basically letting him know that he's a sexy man and I love him. That seemed to do the trick.

Good luck to you!!!

I guess you could talk to him and ask him why he's not attracted to you.......

I appreciate the assumption that he's not attracted to me. That definitely helps.

While that was incredibly rude, I love how you handled it with subtle sarcasm. Would've gone right over some people's heads.

When my husband and I were dating, I got frisky one night, and he told me he was too tired. That's when our rule started. Because really, it's not always easy for both people to be in the mood at exactly the same time. I had a long talk with him about how his saying "no" to sex makes me feel. I asked him if he could remember a single time when I had ever turned him down. He couldn't. I then asked him if he would appreciate it if I turned HIM down. He wouldn't.

Sometimes you just do things for your partner in a committed relationship, and sometimes it's when you don't feel like it. And for me, who doesn't want it nearly as much as my husband, I do it anyway. I figure we owe each other that much.