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I Dated The Above and Ended Up...
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Cooking for her collection in the basement0
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Playing the Easter Bunny.0
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Admiring his cute little cotton tail1
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Living in a tent under a bridge π§
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Being dumped when I wasnβt able to pitch the tent βΉοΈ0
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in church and confessed all my sin0
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Sneaking out the back doors during communion0
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Being called a Heathen after following her lead.0
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She tried to get me exorcisted π but Iβm deaf and kept being like yea letβs do this exercise.. then strange people showed up.1
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Perfecting my exercise technique and form. Reputation is key π€£0
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Getting exercise vids leaked and going viral then leaving the country to Costa Rica π€0
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Communion ? I donβt have that but we ended up finishing the bottle of wine0
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Getting my knees operated on , and having to buy another case of wine0
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Dating a stumbling Wino π€ͺ1
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Hick ---up Hey ya Fab1
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Having a coffee addiction0
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Taking her to coffee rehab0
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Hiring a hitman1
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Getting shwacked I guess π³π€£π€£0
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Buying a casket1
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6 ft under.π³. at least I had a casket. That means she made it look like an accident.0
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Wearing matching outfits ππ1
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Def never happend but she told her friends it did so... We broke up0
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Keeping my clothes under lock and key.
Idk how my tights got stretched.. but Im looking at you π π1 -
Never wanted to share clothes, specially the sparkly thong!ππ€·ββοΈπ1
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Tossing out all my sparkling things? π€·πΌββοΈ
Ohhhhh... nevermind, just My sparkly thongs! π€ͺ0 -
With collection of coffee mugs and ashes from the fireplace0
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A man cuffed to my bbq... now get cooking0
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Never going out for Sushi π₯0
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Moving to another country0
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