"Nice" guys? blech!

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  • JNick77
    JNick77 Posts: 3,783 Member
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    I went through a nice guy phase and it took some "challenging" relationships and some work on my own confidence to change that around. Now I just don't care, take me or leave me doesn't make a difference to me.
  • maria1113
    maria1113 Posts: 508 Member
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    A woman doesn't want a martyr. She wants an equal, caring, adult partner.

    ^ this applies to me. Seriously.
    I have ended up few times nurturing guys feelings because they have been so insecure. It's not the way to go. And no, I didn't hurt them intentionally, they just didn't understand why I saw them only as a friend. "No, it's not your skin tone. No, it's not your looks. No it's not because I don't find you funny, etc." i guess I'm a cruel b*tch then, huh?
    I'm bit insecure myself, but still I cannot understand the clingy type. Truthfully it scares the crap out of me.
    Healthy self confidence is a turn on. And this doesn't mean arrogant or a jerk.
  • netsirk419
    netsirk419 Posts: 30 Member
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    sending this to one of my Nice Guy friends!

    He is your firend? then you know that he wants you? right?

    lol... Sooo true
  • BigDaddyBRC
    BigDaddyBRC Posts: 2,395 Member
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    ROFLMAO. I would tend to agree to disagree.

    No matter your sex...if you are not confident in WHO you are, then you will always struggle. Man or Woman. Too many women rely solely on their emotions. Men feed on this. Too many men rely solely on logic. Women feed on this.

    There is a balance in the heart, find it. When you find someone else that has, it awesome. If not, their loss. End Story. End Game. 'Nough said.
  • thedodgeruk
    thedodgeruk Posts: 132 Member
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    cool , it points out were i have been oing wrong , and i can see a lot of that in me , NEED TO CHANGE NOW !
  • cartern1
    cartern1 Posts: 270 Member
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    I've actually tried to stop being so nice with women I like

    but i agree, confidence is the key
  • i_love_vinegar
    i_love_vinegar Posts: 2,092 Member
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    one thing I've noticed is there are a lot of guys who think they are nice guys, but aren't lol.

    I've been shocked at the number of guys I've met who considered themselves to be nice guys, when they were total *kitten*.

    i love REAL nice guys. ^^
  • cervenec
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    I've dealt with a few "nice" guys and the biggest problem is that they make themselves so inoffensive there's no way to say no without looking, and feeling like a terrible person. :( I've also seen "nice" guys object women the most- no one is quicker to slut shame than a nice guy.

    It's a really bad cycle that gets reinforced easily. People just need to be more confident and less insecure.

    Look for someone who is kind, rather than nice.
  • PBJunkie
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    I've dealt with a few "nice" guys and the biggest problem is that they make themselves so inoffensive there's no way to say no without looking, and feeling like a terrible person. :( I've also seen "nice" guys object women the most- no one is quicker to slut shame than a nice guy.

    It's a really bad cycle that gets reinforced easily. People just need to be more confident and less insecure.

    Look for someone who is kind, rather than nice.

    I'm guilty of slut shaming. It's just I would simply prefer to grow with my wife sexually and have that respect for each other.