What's wrong with me


Background: I'm 52 and have been obese most of my life with occasional pockets of time when I was merely overweight. I know the theories, know about healthy eating, benefits of exercise, good sleep and so on. I've been on this site for a few years now and have taken a long break from logging and weighing myself. I tend to yoyo, losing weight when I'm away on a placement working (I'm a live in carer) because I eat less and am more active, and then put it all back on when I'm on my break in between placements, because I eat more and don't move around so much. I'm very much aware of why I am obese.

This morning I decided it was time to give logging food and MFP another go. I spent a few hours checking up recipes of food I like and will be able to eat happily, while being mindful of the calories. I checked my fridge and cupboards, made a shopping list and went to the supermarket so that I would be ready in the morning for that fresh start after a weigh in.

I had the list in my hand as I did my shopping, sticking to it really well, with only a small addition of a yoghurt I love and had forgotten about. I stopped by the plant based section to pick up some tofu and then I saw them ... a pack of Tesco 6 mini savoury pies. Basically a vegan substitute for pork pies. Freaking delicious, especially when warmed up in a microwave.

And I was totally aware that I shouldn't buy them, because if I did, I would eat all of them once I got home. I stood there looking at them and after a mini internal tantrum, I put them in my basket and bought them. And yes, once I got home, I ate them. About 1100 cals, just like that.

I mean, that's ridiculous, isn't it?


  • saktii2323
    saktii2323 Posts: 27 Member
    Have you ever looked into whether or not you have an ED? Binge eating disorders can happen on a spectrum
  • rs604
    rs604 Posts: 18 Member
    Maybe it’s Menopause?
  • susanUK1969
    susanUK1969 Posts: 6 Member
    I've tinkered with the notion but not taken it further than internet searches. Binge eating seems to be more of a regular planned thing. I think what I do is more of an impulsive and sabotaging thing. I'm quite certain that if I hadn't been planning to start logging food again, I wouldn't have done it. I'm really annoyed with myself.
  • NedStarksHat
    NedStarksHat Posts: 6 Member
    It is fear of missing out. I can relate.
  • ReenieHJ
    ReenieHJ Posts: 9,724 Member
    edited January 30
    Dang, now I want some Butter Butter cookies.

    ETA: wth is up with the disagrees? These people are making valid points and coming from their own POV, how can a person disagree with that?