So much of this journey is lonely...

We want to know about your successes, pitfalls and we are ok with your shortcomings because we know you are more than just your faults... we all have them.

I know exactly how you feel. I was doing this for 5 months and had lost 30+ lbs before anyone said anything. Other than my mom and my husband, but they knew I was doing it.

:grumble: :grumble: :grumble:

Oh boy!!! :bigsmile: :bigsmile: The person who did notice and said something got a big hug in the middle of Walmart. :drinker: :drinker:

Thank you for sharing your story. And, congratulations on your loss.

From my personal experience, that I hope you will find helpful: Remember that what people say (or do not say) is a reflection of them, not of you. And remember that to a large degree, you can chose to have supportive people in your life - or not. Joining this site seems like an important step to developing your own supportive community. While we cannot change our mom's, we can add others to our lives who we can support and who will support us.

My own self image issues, and family history have resulted in my bringing negative/emotionally abusive people into my life. Understanding this problem has led me to correct it. We cannot change people who are in our lives, but we can chose who we invite into our lives. We have a great deal of control over this, at least in the long run.

Again, best wishes & congratulations.

Your post here inspired me to join this site/program. This morning I was feeling glum and thinking about how I've lost 18 pounds (out of 45) I need to lose, and no one seems to have noticed. And when I pass on dessert or tell a waiter to leave off the fries or the chips, someone will usually make a comment that implies that I'm the spoilsport in the group or the family. It is a long, lonely road. All I can say is hurray for you for your progress to date, and hang is there! Thank you for posting this. It helped me a lot to find a kindred soul.

You are awesome!!!!! And your loss IS a big deal!!!!! Your post is perfect because it completely solidifies for me why this type of site is so important. We need the help and support of others on a similar journey!!! We need to know how great it is to drag ourselves out of bed to exercise, or meet our water goal, or stay within our calorie goal, or lose a pound or two. It is these small steps that add up to big ones and you are doing it! Keep up the good work, you can do it!!!! I hope one day I can post that I lost 29 pounds. You are my hero!

I AGREE...WE DO NEED ENCOURAGEMENT!!

Yes, it is a lonely road at times but then again we, alone, did this to ourselves. But I applaud your perseverance in trying to reach your goal! Don't let anyone get you down!

You're mom sounds jealous. So sorry. Look for more relationships that are more supporting. If you don't have a network, you gotta build it. We are here for you. I know what you mean. BUT YOU'RE DOING AWESOME!!!! KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK! I hate to say it, but when you are really heavy and you lose weight, it is hard to notice because a little comes from all over and doesn't ususally make a huge difference in how any one part looks.

My three boys knew that I was dieting and working out. But they could tell a difference, try as they might. They finally noticed my weight loss as follows:

17 year old = 25 lbs lost "You're getting there mom, keep it up. It is about fitness, not weight loss."

12 year old = 35 lbs lost "MOM, I CAN FINALLY TELL YOU ARE LOSING WEIGHT, YOU LOOK SMALLER FROM THE BACK!"

6 year old = 43 lbs lot "Mommy, your tummy looks flatter"

Frankly, I did not notice until about 30 lbs. My husband is very careful about what he says because he wants me to know that he loves me no matter what. I wish he's say more, but he compliments the process like, "Great job working out." That is really awesome of him. But the other day he slipped and said "your butt is really toned". YES!!!

Only two outside persons have commented, both hairdressers. Not even anyone at work has said anything and I've lost 43 frigin pounds! Now other family members are starting to notice too.

Agreed that slimmer clothes highlight your loss AND make you feel a lot better. I bought a few new things at the 30 lbs loss mark. Planning on a few more at the 50 lb loss mark. I have a lot more to lose than you do though.

I love MFP because we have a common goal of health and fitness. I almost never spend time on FB anymore.

I have a funny story. Yesterday, I put on a pair of stretch jeans that used to fit and noticed that the legs and butt were baggy. I had to laugh, so I wouldn't cry. I didn't really need to lose weight in the thighs and butt, but at least now I know where the 16 pounds I lost (before I joined MFP) fell off of me. I've been measuring my waist every week and wondering why it wasn't getting smaller! OK sooner or later, if I stay on the program, it will start to come off my abdomen.

It really will start to shrink at some point, if only because there's no place else left to lose it from. :laugh: I'm finding that with my thighs which are really, really starting to tick me off!

I've lost 15 pounds (140 to 125) and a bunch of body fat and I've received no recognition from anyone but my sister who lives 2 hours away and is my biggest inspiration. My husband hasn't said a word and he knows how hard I'm working and sacrificing to make this happen. I've come to the conclusion that he's simply intimidated and perhaps jealous. He knows he needs to lose weight (perhaps 20-25 pounds all in his gut) but hasn't done anything about it. I don't push and I don't nag because I know we all need to reach the point where we're ready to make the necessary changes on our own. I don't need that recognition, because I'm doing this for me, but it would be really nice to finally hear him say something nice.