Sorry babe. That's a deal-breaker

When she tells me my puns and dad jokes are lame… when I know they are funny and entertaining

When I know the ending to the story three minutes before they stop speaking

Motorsheen wrote: »

TwitchyMagee wrote: »

When I know the ending to the story three minutes before they stop speaking

I completely understand.

All of my stories ends with:

" Rectum !?? .... Damn Near Killed'em!!! "

So when I was a teenager I worked in a Christian bookstore and I have this habit of saying kiss you I hardly know you whenever somebody asks for a tissue and I said it at that bookstore and the assistant manager who was also a stodgy elder of the church got very upset that people would think he was acting inappropriately because I said kiss you I hardly know you and how awesome is it that I was so relatively sheltered for a portion of my life that that never occurred to me.

TwitchyMagee wrote: »

Motorsheen wrote: »

TwitchyMagee wrote: »

When I know the ending to the story three minutes before they stop speaking

I completely understand.

All of my stories ends with:

" Rectum !?? .... Damn Near Killed'em!!! "

So when I was a teenager I worked in a Christian bookstore and I have this habit of saying kiss you I hardly know you whenever somebody asks for a tissue and I said it at that bookstore and the assistant manager who was also a stodgy elder of the church got very upset that people would think he was acting inappropriately because I said kiss you I hardly know you and how awesome is it that I was so relatively sheltered for a portion of my life that that never occurred to me.

I'm willing to bet that the assistant manager / church elder never had himself a full frontal hug with a proper reach-around.

.... probably just one of those church lady, sideways, hip-hugs.... and obviously, without a discreet, casual, side-boob brush-up against.

TwitchyMagee wrote: »

Motorsheen wrote: »

TwitchyMagee wrote: »

Motorsheen wrote: »

TwitchyMagee wrote: »

When I know the ending to the story three minutes before they stop speaking

I completely understand.

All of my stories ends with:

" Rectum !?? .... Damn Near Killed'em!!! "

So when I was a teenager I worked in a Christian bookstore and I have this habit of saying kiss you I hardly know you whenever somebody asks for a tissue and I said it at that bookstore and the assistant manager who was also a stodgy elder of the church got very upset that people would think he was acting inappropriately because I said kiss you I hardly know you and how awesome is it that I was so relatively sheltered for a portion of my life that that never occurred to me.

I'm willing to bet that the assistant manager / church elder never had himself a full frontal hug with a proper reach-around.

.... probably just one of those church lady, sideways, hip-hugs.... and obviously, without a discreet, casual, side-boob brush-up against.

Your familiarity with the culture is impressive.

I kinda get around.

* shrug

Peachesnstuff wrote: »

When they sob uncontrollably without a single tear falling from them lying eyes

Crocodile tears 😂

Codependent
Narcissistic
Gaslighting
Small feet

Toe jam & cheese

ROULER10 wrote: »

Being able to turn her head 360 😐

I’m out

Thick thighs and corduroys

Peachesnstuff wrote: »

Thick thighs and corduroys

Dang, you want me to start a fire with the friction over here ?

bellababy9031 wrote: »

An unwaxed boomerang.

Better bring your Mr Zogs then

Peachesnstuff wrote: »

When he smells like Old Spice

I'm sorry but that's like snuggling up with my Dad

Yo old spice today is. Of the old spice of yester year - with classy fragrances like Swagger and bear claw and the like - a fella rocking old spice today likely smells like the dude with too much cologne on in the club nah I’m sayin - but that prolly doesn’t make it any less if a deal breaker does it ?

When they have to take notes

When I clean up the kitchen after dinner only to find out he has a headache