Less Alcohol ~ DECEMBER 2022 ~ One Day At A Time
Replies
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@SunnyDays930 I always wonder why some days the craving for alcohol is out in full force, other days it’s a “might be nice, but nah “ and yet other days we don’t even want it! Good for you getting through your cravings! Oh and enjoy the concert. Bring tissues and feel the feels!
@joans1976 good news it didn’t spread to lymph nodes! Woo hoo! Hmmm… 7 times bigger than they thought… can you get new boobs out of this at least🤪? Thinking of you as you continue your healing and the waiting game!
@RockinRobyn672 thanks for the snack suggestion! I’m going to check it out.
@lmlmrn do you have a date for the building closing? We are waiting with bated breath!!! No one could blame you for being a ball of stress.
@bover145 sorry you’ve got it all going on, but good for you for giving yourself grace. That’s so important. Plus, you were able to moderate which is huge! Not a lot of people can do that.
@mfowler883 you have GOT to show me a picture of your awesome new boots when they come in!!!!! On the food front, great job listening to your body instead of eating for the wrong reasons. Makes a huge difference!
AF again tonight. I definitely feel better and my weight is coming down. This past Monday was rough. Methinks I was hungover which made PMS symptoms way worse! I have to have to have to HAVE TO not have more than two drinks each day this weekend. It all falls apart for me when I do.4 -
I'm not gonna lie, I'm struggling tonight. I threw on some music, didn't really overthink it...a playlist of Martin Gore's Counterfeit and Counterfeit 2. When I got my copy of Counterfeit, Gary and I listened to it all the time...he would've loved the second one. I was in a pretty bad place, fighting my demons and mostly losing. G really kept me together, and losing him crushed me. We would drive around back roads for hours on end in the night, listening to music and talking and just enjoying each other's company. We went clubbing, went to parties, went to shows, talked about the things we'd been through and all the things we wanted to do in life, music always providing a backdrop, a perpetual soundtrack. He loved music as much as I do...the morning I got that call, as I tried to process the news, I remember the blackness closing in around me. For months afterward, I would catch myself looking out the window waiting for him to come rolling up, I just....couldn't accept that he was gone.
When I find myself going down these paths, all the memories piling up, I really just want to melt into the floor and disappear, want to stop feeling, want to drown myself in a bottle, want to wrap the warm fuzzy codeine blanket around my brain, anything to make it stop.
I don't have anything here anyway, I'm stuck with it, undiluted, full strength, wide screen and high definition. I know this means I won't get to sleep soon, I will lie awake in the dark while it washes over me until fatigue takes over, playing back every last moment in stark, crisp detail. In the morning I will be exhausted, but I'll get up regardless and do all the things. I'd hoped typing it all out would have some cathartic value, bring some small bit of solace. It didn't.
Nights like this are what make this whole not drinking thing hard for me.
So yeah, AF. 9 of 14 days.
-m9 -
December accountability: 6 days AF
Alcohol: 8 days (17 drinks)
Goal: Limit 2 glasses per day; 12-16 AF days per month.
12/14 - 2 wine; DH bought a few bottles of wine but not 6 to get the discount which is a positive sign
Everyone is recovering from COVID in the family which is wonderful because I was really concerned about the youngest one ... 5 months old. But she is fine. I think DH and I had it the lightest probably because we had Omicron in the spring earlier this year and we had the new booster in September. Everyone else that got it at the wedding in the family had never had COVID before and had not gotten the latest booster but did have boosters in the spring.
My sister though was not at the wedding but she is a teacher. She had Omicron in the spring too and had the booster in October; however she had the worse symptoms of all of us this round ... fever for days, really bad cough, fatigue, etc etc. More than likely because she is a stage 4 breast cancer survivor for the past dozen years and her lungs had been comprised. She had to take the entire week off.
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Hello all! I’m Amanda, I’m from Michigan. I am a crazy cat lady and work for a veterinarian. This will be my sixth month with this group and it has helped me cut back on my drinking so much! I am not ready to say I am 100% sober but last month I had 30 days alcohol free 😃
12/1-12/7: 7 out of 7 AF
12/8:AF
The pain is no joke today, yesterday was my first day back at home and I may have done too much. They only give a 2 day supply of narcotic pain meds, otherwise it’s Tylenol and Ibuprofen. I guess it’s Netflix and chill today for me!
12/9: AF
Pain is still here. I wonder if I did too much? I feel like all I did was sit around. I had a friend come visit me, we used to go to the bar together 3 nights a week and get hammered. We talked about all the stupid things we did under the influence and wonder how we made it out unscathed. Neither of us drink anymore. And we both realized last night we are fine with it!
12/10: AF
Healing, healing, healing. Yesterday was rough.
12/11: AF
12/12: AF
I’m getting impatient waiting for results. When I got diagnosed they should have also said “having cancer is also a big waiting game.” Whatever, I think I will go for a walk today even though it is 30 F and grey. I’m a little paranoid to go the stores right now with all the junk going around.
Have a wonderful Tuesday everyone!
12/13: AF
Back to work today. Oh joy. I got the results of what was tested from surgery. In a nutshell: lymph nodes clear so no current spread of disease! 💪🏼Tumor was much larger than they thought, as in like 7 times larger than they thought so now everything is being reviewed and I wait until Monday. I have mixed emotions about this. I have to take this literally one hour at a time.
12/14: AF
Okay everyone, I work from home. I was not in the clinic wrestling German Shepherds and senile Chihuahuas. It was hard, yes, I am sore today, yes but overall am very lucky I work from home. I so appreciate everyone’s concern. ❤️I met with Psychoncology yesterday and have appointments for 3 therapy resources coming up. I am really looking forward to this as I feel like I need to take a step back and just forget about things for awhile.7 -
@SunnyDays930 How ya doin? How was the concert?
@Womona Seriously. New boobs being considered. Will know more Monday. Big decision!
@Lilylady3k Glad to hear people are recovering!
@ahoy_m8 please give yourself some grace. This time of year involves so much pressure and you had a rough 2022. I think we should all just do what makes us and our loved ones happy and be happy we are together. (I sound like a TV commercial, stop me!)
@mfowler883 I am sorry for your loss, this time of year can make these losses stand out. I assume you’re on Reddit?6 -
If you feel like time is going by too fast, try to go AF for an entire month lol. December seems to be dragging but we are half way through the month now. We've been invited to a NYE/Birthday party for one of my oldest friends so we will go and of course I will be the DD. I am not wild about driving country roads in the dark with drunks out there so we decided to get a hotel near where she lives.
The children's concert did not disappoint. One shy little boy faced the back of the room the entire time. He was not having any of this. I just love the innocence and excitement of these little ones. It was one of those priceless moments. Every person in that room had a huge smile on their face, watching them sing.
We had lunch at a bar after and I was watching the bartender make this beautiful martini with cranberries in it. I said,"oh that is so pretty!", and she took the rest out of the shaker and poured it into a glass and set it in front of me! Yikes. I took a sniff; I am not going to lie, it smelled amazing, but handed it to my DH who dispatched of it quickly and declared it delicious. He took one for the team.....not really, he was happy to try it. So that is another win. Came home and made some gingerbread loaves for gifts and threw an "$18.00" piece of paper in my jar as wine is 8.00 per glass at that bar and I never leave without at least 2. So I rounded to 18 to include tip. Drinking is expensive!
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Oh @mfowler883 my heart aches for you. Your friend Gary sounds like an amazing person. Plus a lot of fun to be around! You wrote such a beautiful tribute to him. Grief is a hell of a thing. You’re minding your own business, and then it hits you like a train and takes your breath away. It’s not a linear journey, at all. We never stop loving those that have gone. He is still with you. Hugs.7
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@SunnyDays930 you're right, drinking is expensive!!!! I’m very impressed that you didn’t even take a sip- that’s some hard core willpower right there. I probably would have caved. How cute with the little boy refusing to face the audience. I love that age, so innocent.5
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Stuck at 11 AF....UGH.....things I did wrong yesterday:
1-had a carb-only lunch (zero protein)
2-don't remember drinking water
3-didn't exercise because it was abnormally freezing cold here
4-had to get blood drawn and sat in the lab with a room full of coughers (I had my mask on)
I should have eaten protein to stabilize my blood-sugar (good blood sugar=good mood & good thinking
I should have drank water throughout the day-dehydration confuses the body and results in over-eating
I should have attempted to exercise indoors, even 15 min, to get myself warmed up
I should have sat in my warm car listening to music while waiting for the lab tech
I plan to not be stupid today like yesterday7 -
This group really helps me hold myself accountable, plus everyone is absolutely great. My monthly goal is 16-19 AF days (3A days max weekly) for weight loss and overall health. I post in the mornings about the previous day.
12/12: Drinks (2.5)
12/13: AF
12/14: Drinks (2.5) - This was a hungry day even though I ate a healthy breakfast and lunch with a snack in between. I make progress then I don't. I had my last NA Lagunatas with dinner. Later I lost my resolve and shared beers and snacks with hubby. I ask myself WHY I do this. Is it boredom or frustration or anxiety about the holiday? Is it because I wanted to try out new healthy snack packs that I purchased? Is it because I haven't finished Xmas shopping? Is it something else? I need to ponder more on this and determine a way to divert myself when it happens. I'm not going to beat myself up. Today is another day. Big picture? I'm doing great. I have one more A day remaining this week. I will do it!
Rolling Total: 7 AF Days out of 146 -
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Hello, I used to have a sobriety thread on here. (Sobriety Matters it was called). I posted something that I later regretted very much. I spoke about my personal experience with moderate drinking and it was very insensitive as it mirrored people's efforts on this thread and I realise I caused offence. I still deeply regret that, all I can say is that I was in a very dark place with my mental health. I just wanted to apologise again wholeheartedly. I did feel ashamed of what I posted. I miss posting on here and I am sorry to have let people down who had supported me on my sober journey. Just want to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and I wish you all the best for 2023. I don't expect anyone wants to hear from me, but I just wanted to apologise again. I will get outa here now. Thanks for listening.
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I'm tired, as expected, although my head's in a better place this morning.@mfowler883 I am sorry for your loss, this time of year can make these losses stand out. I assume you’re on Reddit?
Thanks. Oddly, I don't find that particular times or seasons have much influence on when I get stuck in my head. Places, sometimes. Music, though, is particularly powerful - a lot of times I hear something and it's like stepping through a wormhole straight back into a time and place that is associated with that particular song.
Reddit, nope. I occasionally browse a thread there when looking for some specific info but generally don't much care for reddit. I used to be a lot more active online, but I've more or less ditched all the social media and forums. This thread is about the only place I'm active anymore, because it ties directly to my desire to drink less at this point in my life.Oh @mfowler883 my heart aches for you. Your friend Gary sounds like an amazing person. Plus a lot of fun to be around! You wrote such a beautiful tribute to him. Grief is a hell of a thing. You’re minding your own business, and then it hits you like a train and takes your breath away. It’s not a linear journey, at all. We never stop loving those that have gone. He is still with you. Hugs.
Thanks. He was my best friend, and at times my only friend. It's hard to believe he's been gone for 27 years...half a lifetime ago. A lot of the time, I'm okay, I can think of him and smile. I can hear a song and think, man G would've loved this. I can think of a great story and laugh.
One summer afternoon, perhaps '92 or '93, Gary and I were standing around in the driveway just killing time. He had an '84 Buick Regal four door, and it was his baby, his pride and joy. It was, however, starting to show it's age - the paint was weathered, fading and dull. I ran to the garage and returned with a tin of Mother's and a couple of rags, and I polished a spot perhaps a foot across, right smack in the middle of his trunk lid. It was amazing, the difference was night and day, the paint looked better than new. You could see your face in it, the shine was so clear and deep!
Next time I saw him, he was furious, I'll never forget it. He just went on this rant, "You A-HOLE! I had to polish my WHOLE CAR! I did it by hand, it took HOURS!!!"
God I miss him...
-m5 -
Hi @Holidays22. I read this thread most days and I was following yours as well although my focus is on reducing alcohol rather than eliminating it. I think there are some people on this thread who are AF, though most seem to be focused on reduction. I got a lot out of your thread and am sorry you felt you needed to take it down. I hope you are doing better now.6
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Holidays22 wrote: »Hello, I used to have a sobriety thread on here. (Sobriety Matters it was called). I posted something that I later regretted very much. I spoke about my personal experience with moderate drinking and it was very insensitive as it mirrored people's efforts on this thread and I realise I caused offence. I still deeply regret that, all I can say is that I was in a very dark place with my mental health. I just wanted to apologise again wholeheartedly. I did feel ashamed of what I posted. I miss posting on here and I am sorry to have let people down who had supported me on my sober journey. Just want to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and I wish you all the best for 2023. I don't expect anyone wants to hear from me, but I just wanted to apologise again. I will get outa here now. Thanks for listening.
@bein2today / @Holidays22 I was on the road, moving and traveling when this occurred and did not see what you had posted and did not see a retaliation post towards yours.
I will empathize this to everyone that comes to this thread to read or post.
WE are about drinking LESS. It means something different to each individual.
There are times we all( myself included) get very involved in our own journey to drink LESS and may project an overwhelming excitement for the goals and strategies that it takes to meet out own personal expectations.
WE are all human, things get said and misinterpreted especially with having to type them and not hear the tone in a voice.
I welcome you back to our group, you have been a part of us for years off and on. What ever happened was in the past, and is just that, IN THE PAST.
Thank you for your post, ❤
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@ahoy_m8
Happy birthday month!
I think of you sometimes when my schedule wants me to be AF during the work week. You have been so good about that!4 -
Holidays22 wrote: »Hello, I used to have a sobriety thread on here. (Sobriety Matters it was called). I posted something that I later regretted very much. I spoke about my personal experience with moderate drinking and it was very insensitive as it mirrored people's efforts on this thread and I realise I caused offence. I still deeply regret that, all I can say is that I was in a very dark place with my mental health. I just wanted to apologise again wholeheartedly. I did feel ashamed of what I posted. I miss posting on here and I am sorry to have let people down who had supported me on my sober journey. Just want to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and I wish you all the best for 2023. I don't expect anyone wants to hear from me, but I just wanted to apologise again. I will get outa here now. Thanks for listening.
I don't know the whole story here. I think there's a bit of a difference in mindset and in what is appropriate when comparing sobriety with moderation. Each of us is on our own journey, we don't even always know what the destination is, sometimes we're just putting one foot in front of the other, going through the motions and trying to figure it out. Sometimes we say and do things that come off in unintended ways, sometimes we offend people, sometimes we let our demons drive us to say and do things that are not okay. It's not the end of the world, there is usually room to make amends in the aftermath.
-m4 -
I am Dawn, I live in SE BC Canada
My primary motivation for drinking less is weight loss.
I throw up if I have more than 3 drinks, so moderation on drink days is rarely an issue for me lol.
My recurring goal is 16-20 AF days per month. I squeaked to 16 last month.
I like to do this diary style to keep track.
Wednesday December 14 - AF - I was really craving a drink last night after work, but figured that I had to hang tough for a couple of more days. First Wednesday public skating at a local arena during my break, they finally opened back up. I walk there from work and bring my skates into work so that they are not too cold to put on my feet. Looking forward to doing that every Wednesday between my split shift : - )
Rolling total - 9AF day out of 14 days6 -
@Holidays22 You cannot imagine how happy I am to see you. Everyone's journey is their own and I am sure no one was offended that much. We are all grown ups here. I hope you keep posting. I wish you a very Merry Christmas!
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Holidays22 wrote: »Hello, I used to have a sobriety thread on here. (Sobriety Matters it was called). I posted something that I later regretted very much. I spoke about my personal experience with moderate drinking and it was very insensitive as it mirrored people's efforts on this thread and I realise I caused offence. I still deeply regret that, all I can say is that I was in a very dark place with my mental health. I just wanted to apologise again wholeheartedly. I did feel ashamed of what I posted. I miss posting on here and I am sorry to have let people down who had supported me on my sober journey. Just want to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and I wish you all the best for 2023. I don't expect anyone wants to hear from me, but I just wanted to apologise again. I will get outa here now. Thanks for listening.
I didn't read what you posted that you felt was offensive. I think it's lovely that you apologize but I don't think you really needed to, because there was no ill intent to what you posted (I assume.). I am very happy you are ok though. We were worried about you and missed you!5
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