Less Alcohol ~ DECEMBER 2022 ~ One Day At A Time
Replies
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December accountability: 7 days AF
Alcohol: 10 days (25 drinks)
Goal: Limit 2 glasses per day; 12-16 AF days per month.
12/17 - 4 wine ; my sister had dinner with us on steak night
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Catching up after spending the entire day Saturday looking for one piece of paper I " put in a safe place" as I refer to it when I can't find something. ERrrrr no I never found it.
I had ready planned in advance that lastnight it was ok for alcohol drinks.
Stuck to plan, 2 drinks with food over a two hour span. Then home.
After we got home my husband kept opening the cabinet where his stash of booze is, showing me different options I could indulge in. Funny...I never mentioned I was interested in another drink.
I believe he was just in need of a drinking partner so he could keep having more. I didn't let my drinking brain fall for it. And off to read I went.
December accountability
(3 drinks total)
2 A days
15 AF days
Liking these numbers10 -
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RockinRobyn672 wrote: »
Let me know how you like it. Because I started out with the grapefruit Clausthaler, the original does not do it for me and I would drink a Heinekin00 over it.
I may just breakdown down and try amazon for the grapefruit variety. I bought a case when I visited in New Hampshire last Summer. It was amazing on a hot day.3 -
This group really helps me hold myself accountable, plus everyone is absolutely great. My monthly goal is 16-19 AF days (3A days max weekly) for weight loss and overall health. I post in the mornings about the previous day.
12/12: Drinks (2.5)
12/13: AF
12/14: Drinks (2.5)
12/15: Drinks (2)
12/16: AF
12/17: AF - I asked and they had TWO choices of NA beers at the hole-in-wall where we went for barbecue and live music. I had a St. Pauli Girl NA beer and it was really good. I also tried out the Clausthaler Dry Hopped NA beer that arrived from Amazon, which was also very good. I really appreciate the recommendations and tips. Unfortunately, the NA beer was the best part of that experience
. Barbecue and music .... not so good.
Rolling Total: 9 AF Days out of 17
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Good vibes to each of you going through your own personal stuff right now.
This is a group hug
🙇♀️6 -
@dawnbgethealthy What a great day you had. I'm so glad. The stinger sounds delicious. I may have to try it.3
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@joans1976 You can always express your concerns, but you're right that it may not make a difference. I will share my story here. I had the absolute best dad in the world. He was handsome, cool, funny, and very intelligent although his family was poor and he had to drop out of school to help out on the farm. I was a daddy's girl and he was my hero. I thought he knew everything and could fix anything. He was to me like Andy Griffith was to Opie. The sad part of this story is that he started drinking very heavily about the time I went to college. He had a mid-life crisis and really needed counseling, but was unwilling. He turned into someone we didn't know when he drank. He became the Mr. Hyde of Jekyll and Hyde. My mom did not drink. When drinking he would become verbally abusive to her. Nothing I nor anyone else could say or do stopped him from drinking. I had him committed twice. It was humiliating and the hardest thing I'd ever done in my life. I thought he would hate me but he later told me that I was the one who never gave up on him. My parents split up after 42 years of marriage. He found a drinking partner and lived with her for a few years. I thought he would die an alcoholic but later in life he tired of it, reconnected with an old flame, remarried and totally stopped drinking. We had my dad back for the last 17 years of his life. I will be forever grateful for that. He was back but not quite the same after that. He never could really forgive himself for those 20+ years of heavy drinking. In his mid-80s he started having bad health problems (COPD and memory issues). He took his own life in the end because he didn't want to be a burden. It was hard but I understood his thinking and I've come to terms with it. Anyways, I'm not sure why I'm writing you this long story because it's a bit different from yours other than to say that there's always hope for those you love. You'll have to decide but may be good for your parents to know your concerns at least, and you are showing them by example, which is more than words.8
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AF Christmas Punch
2 c orange juice
2 c cranberry juice
1 c pineapple juice
1 c ginger ale
mix and enjoy!5 -
@mfowler883 I can't imagine what you're going through, but my thoughts are with you.
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Thanks again for the kind words, y'all. I sometimes think each of us lives in our own private version of hell. We carry our pains and injuries with us through our lives; some of them simmer down to a dull ache that just occasionally flares up to remind us of their presence.
Most days, I'm pretty okay. Some days, though, I find myself caught up in one thing or another, some old bit of misery that has lingered around.
I know my own weaknesses. I know if I have a drink, I'm going to want to have all the drinks. I know that I'll feel rough in the morning and have to get up and do all the things anyway. I know that I'll consume a million calories worth of alcohol and that alcohol impedes our body's ability to metabolize fats. I know that alcohol has negative effects on our mental health.
And I do it anyway.
Gonna try to stay AF today.
-m7 -
btw @mfowler883 Thank you for sharing your story from your past. You have moved forward and come a long way. But you wanted to change, thats the difference.
Ok no did not stay AF last night nor will I this afternoon (will be 2 beers, nap and done). But I have mentally resolved myself to go back to only a days on the weekend during the next few weeks.
We went to my mothers today and picked up her spare queen sized bed for my daughters family, between that and two blow up beds we are in good shape. Tomorrow I will finish washing all the bedding and make the beds, then the rest of the week small stuff. Like making daughter/family their shampoo, conditioner, body wash. Then I hope when they get here my granddaughter and I will formulate some riff of burts bees for my daughter (including the menthol) and maybe a lotion bar in the shape of a bee/honeycomb. Simple stuff.
Wow mocktail recipes..
@MissMay you have lots of those right? please share you top 4...pretty please.....4 -
yeah, a post can be "edited " , but not "undone". Only a lengthy important post disappears into the ether.....this post is to end my futile attempt to delete something....Merry whatever y'all are celebrating !!
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I learn so much from all of you. This team is about chasing happiness in a healthy way. There's been, I think, about 8-10 of us on here that have been around like 2-3 years?
I hope that all of you find that strength and ability in yourselves to change course and let go of psychological pains that haunt. I have many life events that left me with scars that I still battle.
My thoughts for you all is simple: Look forward, not back. Be open to re-programming your habits. Seek professional or medical support or whatever tools you need. Make a plan for your success. I am.
This is about making yourself happier and healthier. I challenge those of you who feel ready to develop their plan for success for 2023.
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@globalhiker hope you can read these. Here are two recipes from a good AF cocktail book I got last year.
This is the syrup for the pomegranate drink:
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@Womona! Perfect timing. I am making these and if I can get this book I will. Thank you!!! Pomegranate is my #1 fruit and flavor! You're the best!
Separately, @dawnbegethealthy will appreciate this - the 4 slabs of pork spare ribs have been procured ad ready for Christmas grilling
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SunnyDays930 wrote: »The suicide of Ellen's beloved sidekick, Twitch, has me rattled. Everyone saying how happy he seemed, how much he loved his family etc. My very wise, late father often reminded me that, "we all carry an invisible bucket of tears." This is so true. We do not know what the stranger walking past us is suffering, or maybe even those close to us. We must do our best to be kind and compassionate to all. Most of all, we must try to muster up gratitude for what blessings we DO have.
The Christmas season can be very difficult for those that are in grief for whatever reason. Life is never like a Hallmark movie for most of us. We are all just doing the best we can.
I admire every single one of you for sharing your honesty and struggles here. I am sure there are those following this thread silently that feel the same.
Very well said.4 -
@mfowler883 hope you’re having a better day today. Thinking of you!
@joans1976 my parents weren’t drinkers, so no insights to help with that. My dad however, was stubborn as hell!
I did it! No more than two wines each day this weekend! Woo hoo yay me! I feel great. Ready to get back at my workout routine tomorrow. Plus, I had a very productive weekend, so double bonus points!7 -
Chocolate coconut rum mocktini-
Prepare martini glass by putting in freezer or filling with ice for 5 minutes.
Put all of the fallowing into a cocktail shaker and shake away.
Chocolate boost(the nutritional drink)
Rum extract
Cream of coconut
Cool whip
Ice
Get chilled glass and add shredded coconut for rim and some shaved chocolate for top garnish.
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Today was different. Had to take the boy shopping to find him some new jeans for work. He's at a really odd size that is hard to find, so it turned into an all day irritating affair. He is progressing and growing and doing well in many ways, but some things he just still doesn't get. Food-wise, I haven't done too poorly. I splurged on a wicked homemade nova lox bagel for brunch which was crazy good if somewhat calorie dense, but was good the rest of the day. Anyway, back home now and winding down. I know I said I was gonna try to make today AF; I've got the remains of a bottle of whiskey barrel aged red sitting over there and I will probably sip on it while listening to Dark Wave tonight. Listening to Hiraes, a melodic death metal band the boy recently turned me on to, until that comes on. I'm glad he wound up with good taste in music! My head is in a good place tonight, so there's that. Early start tomorrow...
BTW, I like the idea of using extracts or flavorings to give an NA cocktail a flavor more evocative of the real deal. That hadn't occurred to me.
-m
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December accountability: 7 days AF
Alcohol: 11 days (27 drinks)
Goal: Limit 2 glasses per day; 12-16 AF days per month.
12/18 - 2 wine at ladies luncheon; DH & I had nothing in the evening
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Hello all! I’m still Amanda, I’m from Michigan. I am still a crazy cat lady and work for a veterinarian. This will be my sixth month with this group and it has helped me cut back on my drinking so much! I am not ready to say I am 100% sober but last month I had 30 days alcohol free 😃
12/1-12/7: 7 out of 7 AF
12/8-12/14: 7 out of 7 AF
Rolling total: 14 out of 14 AF
12/15: AF
My dad always buys a giant bottle of Baileys over the holidays and we put it in coffee and top it with whipped cream (if you want) or pour it over ice. I just perused the interwebz a bit and I don’t see AF Baileys. You can make it but it looks like such a pain in my behind I think I’ll just skip it this year or just have one.
So proud of everyone for their AF streaks, especially during this season that can be tricky.
12/16: AF
Back to my pre-surgical weight today! I gained 5 pounds with that surgery. I’m still not anywhere near where I want to be but any loss in December for me is a win!
12/17: AF
I did way too much yesterday and am paying for it with soreness today. 12 days out from surgery and ready to be back to normal!
I made like 4 million cookies with my mom yesterday, a tradition. She did not start drinking before noon which helped the process go smoother. My dad got pretty toasted before dinner which is odd and I didn’t necessarily like it. I’m kind of at a cross roads with saying something about their drinking. For one, they are going to keep drinking if they want to. And they are still getting used to me not drinking with them. However, they are already unsteady on their feet and adding alcohol makes their fall risk go up. I know a lot of you deal with partners drinking but have/did/are any of you dealing with an elderly parent drinking?
12/18: AF
I am at day 51 AF. It surprises me when I actually count it up. I still get cravings (?) but they pass. I always think of the whole movie I guess. I was actually waking up in the middle of the night, suddenly, and vomiting, even on nights I had not drank anything. Scared me. One of many reasons to stop and/or cut back.5 -
Dec 19, Day 19 AF. One more day and I will equal my AF streak of last January. I've lost a measly 3.2 lbs since Dec 1 but they do say if you lose it slowly, it tends to stay off. I must say I have pretty much been eating everything else I want, but the mindless, drunken snacking is gone. That was a lot of calories every evening.
I haven't decided what will happen on January 1st. I waffle between keeping it going, and trying to indulge once in a while. I think I know myself well enough to know what will happen if I open that door again, but I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. Right NOW, I think (hope) I will tell myself, "OK, now lets try for another week" etc. We will see. A drink, like an unopened present, might turn out to be more exciting while it is still wrapped up. Once I open it (drink it) I strongly suspect it won't be nearly as fun as anticipated.6 -
@joans1976 You inspire me so much!5
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@Womona Woohoo! So glad for you! Congrats!
@RockinRobyn672 Thank you for sharing your story. What a story it is! My dad was my hero and could do no wrong up until I saw my mom get sick in 2011 and I had to be the caregiver and he just kind of….ignored it. I wasn’t mad but I noticed. Now I worry about his drinking because since he lost 75% of his hearing, he makes a lot more mistakes and just seems to be in a different world. I think there’s a touch of senility setting in and then add red wine to that and, well, not good. I’m not sure how to handle it but I definitely do not drink with or in front of them any more and they are still offering me wine (🙄) when I’m there. I used to say no thank you but now I say, “I haven’t been drinking for months now. I have to drive home, I can’t drink. I also have breast cancer, it’s not good for me to drink.” Trying to make them see the difference. *sigh* Sorry for the rant.6 -
@Womona Woohoo! So glad for you! Congrats!
@RockinRobyn672 Thank you for sharing your story. What a story it is! My dad was my hero and could do no wrong up until I saw my mom get sick in 2011 and I had to be the caregiver and he just kind of….ignored it. I wasn’t mad but I noticed. Now I worry about his drinking because since he lost 75% of his hearing, he makes a lot more mistakes and just seems to be in a different world. I think there’s a touch of senility setting in and then add red wine to that and, well, not good. I’m not sure how to handle it but I definitely do not drink with or in front of them any more and they are still offering me wine (🙄) when I’m there. I used to say no thank you but now I say, “I haven’t been drinking for months now. I have to drive home, I can’t drink. I also have breast cancer, it’s not good for me to drink.” Trying to make them see the difference. *sigh* Sorry for the rant.
Thanks!
@RockinRobyn672 That must have been so painful to watch and go through, but I’m glad you got your dad back in the end. Hugs!
@joans1976 does your dad actually wear his hearing aid? I know so many elderly folks who own them but never seem to have them in. That can contribute to the “he’s in another world “ issue. Wine definitely does not help with dottiness and tippiness. As for your dad ignoring when your mom got sick, I think men of that generation are absolutely lost without their wives (even if they were the traditional bread winner “man’s work” guys). I suspect that was his coping mechanism- he just couldn’t deal with the thought of losing her. He is “supposed to” get sick and go first, and the thought of it possibly not being the case rattled him to the core.
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@Womona The hearing aides are an issue. He wears them but we arent sure hes got them set up right. They are attached to his phone. Which hes having more and more trouble with. He goes to the hearing aide doctor A LOT and my mom went with him a few times and explained to the doctor that he cant hear and that he will fake understanding. We think the doctor has him figured out, I mean he cant be the first elderly man shes come across.
When my mom got sick, it was right before hunting season. Nothing, I mean nothing makes this man miss hunting season. She was diagnosed with a brain tumor. She had surgery to remove a tangerine sized mass from her brain (benign we eventually found out) on 11/10 and he left for hunting 12 hours after her surgery. She was still in the ICU but was supposedly going to be okay. I was taking pre-nursing classes full time and working full time and he just...left. It was the first time he ever let me down so I think it sticks in my memory harder.
Obviously what I think Im getting at is my parents are getting older and are requiring more care and are going to lose some of their independence, which is something I need to speak to their doctors about but Im pretty sure the doctors will not want them drinking. Dont even get me started on their driving. Sober.5 -
@Womona Thanks for the mocktail recipes and the name of the book! They look delicious! I'm going to look for that book for me. I may buy one of these for a family member who is also cutting back. I'd also like to buy it for a family member that I'm concerned about but that I'm also concerned it will offend.3
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@joans1976 I had to stop my mom from driving at 89 and it was a constant battle with her until she died at 95. I have a funny story. I allowed her to keep her car so that it would look like someone was home and I know she thought she would be able to sneak and drive it. My hubby researched and found online advice to remove a particular fuse so that the car wouldn't crank and to add a note on the motor that says "Do not repair. Call .... ". So my mom (who was around age 93 at the time) called a neighbor over to figure out what was wrong with the car. He was the one neighbor with whom we didn't share our secret. So my husband missed the call but there was a voicemail where he heard the neighbor telling mom about the note! She never said anything to me about it. I'm sure she knew it was me who was behind it.4
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