Where to get help

2

Replies

  • sollyn23l2
    sollyn23l2 Posts: 1,786 Member
    I found that for me, it's about being careful about what food I buy and bring into my house. If it's not there, I can't eat it. If you *must* keep it in the house for other people, absolutely keep it put away where you can't see it.
  • penguinmama87
    penguinmama87 Posts: 1,155 Member
    ghrmj wrote: »
    LifeChangz wrote: »
    @ghrmj ~ so, a few weeks later, middle of the holiday feasting, how's it going?

    I found some helpful tidbits in the Beck book as well - including ideas for dealing with special occasions like the holiday treats we encounter this time of year.

    on regular days - which we'll get back to soon, i think a bit of structure in the evenings can help - instead of freeform eating. I found it helpful to schedule meals/snacks and close the kitchen inbetween - so there was no argument in the brain.

    bingeing, real 'can't help myself' extra eating is a bit of a different ball game - and often leads to feelings of anger/failure after it happens... get up, dust off, look at what happened, strategize what you can do next time - the Beck book is helpful in analyzing these types of things. perhaps most importantly, don't beat yourself up... get up, make a plan, try more.... assess, adjust, try again. eventually you'll fix whatever and take on something else.... can't wait to hear how you're doing again! Cheers :)

    Thanks for asking but I am doing not well. I gained the 5 lbs I lost back over the holidays - so I went back in my usual cycle of sticking to it for a while, losing a bit, and then falling back and failing.
    I honestly don't know why this is so difficult for me, I literally eat things that I know AS I AM EATING them that I shouldn't be, and I don't want them, but I do it anyway. I am reading a book on binge eating, and it talks about breaking that habit so maybe there will be something there that might help. It's honestly embarrassing at this point.

    One thing that has helped me a lot with this kind of thinking is recognizing that one poor choice is one poor choice, not an inevitable predictor of all future choices. It's certainly easier to make good choices when you're in the habit of it, but one thing that amazed me was hearing that some of the long term maintainers here still occasionally have (even unplanned!) meals or days like this. But they dust themselves off and go back to it, and on average the math still all works out.

    I think whether it's nature or nature, for whatever reason some of us are just really primed to seek solace in food, and at least in my case I had to find something else to replace that at least most of the time. I'm a reasonably intelligent person but I couldn't reason with my instinctive brain past a certain point, so my strategy has been to head that off as early as possible. I don't keep certain things in my house, I even locked up foods if I had to keep them at home, I found other things to do to cope when I got really stressed out, and I also started taking care of myself in other ways too that I had been neglecting (sleep being the big one here.) I planned (and prelogged by weight) small treats for myself.

    I don't have to lock things up anymore, but at first I was firmer with myself until the good habit grooves were established.

    I'll also mention that at 6'0" 1500 calories seems really low. I'm 5'6" and I would be absolutely miserable on that. Have you tracked for a solid month to see how the math shakes out? I've learned I'd rather move more and get to eat more than try to eat less and be really hungry all the time. A little discomfort is to be expected, but binging is a lot more likely if you're over restricting.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    ghrmj wrote: »
    LifeChangz wrote: »
    @ghrmj ~ so, a few weeks later, middle of the holiday feasting, how's it going?

    I found some helpful tidbits in the Beck book as well - including ideas for dealing with special occasions like the holiday treats we encounter this time of year.

    on regular days - which we'll get back to soon, i think a bit of structure in the evenings can help - instead of freeform eating. I found it helpful to schedule meals/snacks and close the kitchen inbetween - so there was no argument in the brain.

    bingeing, real 'can't help myself' extra eating is a bit of a different ball game - and often leads to feelings of anger/failure after it happens... get up, dust off, look at what happened, strategize what you can do next time - the Beck book is helpful in analyzing these types of things. perhaps most importantly, don't beat yourself up... get up, make a plan, try more.... assess, adjust, try again. eventually you'll fix whatever and take on something else.... can't wait to hear how you're doing again! Cheers :)

    Thanks for asking but I am doing not well. I gained the 5 lbs I lost back over the holidays - so I went back in my usual cycle of sticking to it for a while, losing a bit, and then falling back and failing.
    I honestly don't know why this is so difficult for me, I literally eat things that I know AS I AM EATING them that I shouldn't be, and I don't want them, but I do it anyway. I am reading a book on binge eating, and it talks about breaking that habit so maybe there will be something there that might help. It's honestly embarrassing at this point.

    One thing that has helped me a lot with this kind of thinking is recognizing that one poor choice is one poor choice, not an inevitable predictor of all future choices. It's certainly easier to make good choices when you're in the habit of it, but one thing that amazed me was hearing that some of the long term maintainers here still occasionally have (even unplanned!) meals or days like this. But they dust themselves off and go back to it, and on average the math still all works out.

    I think whether it's nature or nature, for whatever reason some of us are just really primed to seek solace in food, and at least in my case I had to find something else to replace that at least most of the time. I'm a reasonably intelligent person but I couldn't reason with my instinctive brain past a certain point, so my strategy has been to head that off as early as possible. I don't keep certain things in my house, I even locked up foods if I had to keep them at home, I found other things to do to cope when I got really stressed out, and I also started taking care of myself in other ways too that I had been neglecting (sleep being the big one here.) I planned (and prelogged by weight) small treats for myself.

    I don't have to lock things up anymore, but at first I was firmer with myself until the good habit grooves were established.

    I'll also mention that at 6'0" 1500 calories seems really low. I'm 5'6" and I would be absolutely miserable on that. Have you tracked for a solid month to see how the math shakes out? I've learned I'd rather move more and get to eat more than try to eat less and be really hungry all the time. A little discomfort is to be expected, but binging is a lot more likely if you're over restricting.

    Yes, I'm 5'6" and need 1500 calories PLUS around 500 exercise calories to be happy.

    @ghrmj are you on any medications that are associated with increased appetite? I just found out my antidepressant, Remeron, is also given to people with anorexia to increase appetite >.< With that, I need even more than the 2000 calories to feel satisfied, and have been gaining weight.
  • ghrmj
    ghrmj Posts: 86 Member
    edited January 2023
    kshama2001 wrote: »
    ghrmj wrote: »
    LifeChangz wrote: »
    @ghrmj ~ so, a few weeks later, middle of the holiday feasting, how's it going?

    I found some helpful tidbits in the Beck book as well - including ideas for dealing with special occasions like the holiday treats we encounter this time of year.

    on regular days - which we'll get back to soon, i think a bit of structure in the evenings can help - instead of freeform eating. I found it helpful to schedule meals/snacks and close the kitchen inbetween - so there was no argument in the brain.

    bingeing, real 'can't help myself' extra eating is a bit of a different ball game - and often leads to feelings of anger/failure after it happens... get up, dust off, look at what happened, strategize what you can do next time - the Beck book is helpful in analyzing these types of things. perhaps most importantly, don't beat yourself up... get up, make a plan, try more.... assess, adjust, try again. eventually you'll fix whatever and take on something else.... can't wait to hear how you're doing again! Cheers :)

    Thanks for asking but I am doing not well. I gained the 5 lbs I lost back over the holidays - so I went back in my usual cycle of sticking to it for a while, losing a bit, and then falling back and failing.
    I honestly don't know why this is so difficult for me, I literally eat things that I know AS I AM EATING them that I shouldn't be, and I don't want them, but I do it anyway. I am reading a book on binge eating, and it talks about breaking that habit so maybe there will be something there that might help. It's honestly embarrassing at this point.

    One thing that has helped me a lot with this kind of thinking is recognizing that one poor choice is one poor choice, not an inevitable predictor of all future choices. It's certainly easier to make good choices when you're in the habit of it, but one thing that amazed me was hearing that some of the long term maintainers here still occasionally have (even unplanned!) meals or days like this. But they dust themselves off and go back to it, and on average the math still all works out.

    I think whether it's nature or nature, for whatever reason some of us are just really primed to seek solace in food, and at least in my case I had to find something else to replace that at least most of the time. I'm a reasonably intelligent person but I couldn't reason with my instinctive brain past a certain point, so my strategy has been to head that off as early as possible. I don't keep certain things in my house, I even locked up foods if I had to keep them at home, I found other things to do to cope when I got really stressed out, and I also started taking care of myself in other ways too that I had been neglecting (sleep being the big one here.) I planned (and prelogged by weight) small treats for myself.

    I don't have to lock things up anymore, but at first I was firmer with myself until the good habit grooves were established.

    I'll also mention that at 6'0" 1500 calories seems really low. I'm 5'6" and I would be absolutely miserable on that. Have you tracked for a solid month to see how the math shakes out? I've learned I'd rather move more and get to eat more than try to eat less and be really hungry all the time. A little discomfort is to be expected, but binging is a lot more likely if you're over restricting.

    Yes, I'm 5'6" and need 1500 calories PLUS around 500 exercise calories to be happy.

    @ghrmj are you on any medications that are associated with increased appetite? I just found out my antidepressant, Remeron, is also given to people with anorexia to increase appetite >.< With that, I need even more than the 2000 calories to feel satisfied, and have been gaining weight.

    No I don't take any medication. It's not my appetite that is the problem, I know I don't eat because of hunger, I have come to realize that I have a problem with binge eating and self control.
  • ghrmj
    ghrmj Posts: 86 Member
    ghrmj wrote: »
    LifeChangz wrote: »
    @ghrmj ~ so, a few weeks later, middle of the holiday feasting, how's it going?

    I found some helpful tidbits in the Beck book as well - including ideas for dealing with special occasions like the holiday treats we encounter this time of year.

    on regular days - which we'll get back to soon, i think a bit of structure in the evenings can help - instead of freeform eating. I found it helpful to schedule meals/snacks and close the kitchen inbetween - so there was no argument in the brain.

    bingeing, real 'can't help myself' extra eating is a bit of a different ball game - and often leads to feelings of anger/failure after it happens... get up, dust off, look at what happened, strategize what you can do next time - the Beck book is helpful in analyzing these types of things. perhaps most importantly, don't beat yourself up... get up, make a plan, try more.... assess, adjust, try again. eventually you'll fix whatever and take on something else.... can't wait to hear how you're doing again! Cheers :)

    Thanks for asking but I am doing not well. I gained the 5 lbs I lost back over the holidays - so I went back in my usual cycle of sticking to it for a while, losing a bit, and then falling back and failing.
    I honestly don't know why this is so difficult for me, I literally eat things that I know AS I AM EATING them that I shouldn't be, and I don't want them, but I do it anyway. I am reading a book on binge eating, and it talks about breaking that habit so maybe there will be something there that might help. It's honestly embarrassing at this point.

    One thing that has helped me a lot with this kind of thinking is recognizing that one poor choice is one poor choice, not an inevitable predictor of all future choices. It's certainly easier to make good choices when you're in the habit of it, but one thing that amazed me was hearing that some of the long term maintainers here still occasionally have (even unplanned!) meals or days like this. But they dust themselves off and go back to it, and on average the math still all works out.

    I think whether it's nature or nature, for whatever reason some of us are just really primed to seek solace in food, and at least in my case I had to find something else to replace that at least most of the time. I'm a reasonably intelligent person but I couldn't reason with my instinctive brain past a certain point, so my strategy has been to head that off as early as possible. I don't keep certain things in my house, I even locked up foods if I had to keep them at home, I found other things to do to cope when I got really stressed out, and I also started taking care of myself in other ways too that I had been neglecting (sleep being the big one here.) I planned (and prelogged by weight) small treats for myself.

    I don't have to lock things up anymore, but at first I was firmer with myself until the good habit grooves were established.

    I'll also mention that at 6'0" 1500 calories seems really low. I'm 5'6" and I would be absolutely miserable on that. Have you tracked for a solid month to see how the math shakes out? I've learned I'd rather move more and get to eat more than try to eat less and be really hungry all the time. A little discomfort is to be expected, but binging is a lot more likely if you're over restricting.

    I'm not over restricting, I realize I have an issue with binge eating and self control. I don't think it has to do with being hungry, it is just a bad habit that I have reinforced and am finding hard to break. The holidays did make it worse because we had a lot of people here and a lot of problem foods. And after that I just got back from a weeks vacation at a resort in the Caribbean, so that didn't help my self control either.

    For a normal person I don't think a 5lbs gain over the holidays and vacation would be a huge deal, and really it isn't a huge deal I guess - but the timing is just bad because I had just lost my first like 6 lbs so for me it is starting over (again) now.

    I want to be healthy and I want to be thin - I just have to keep at it trying strategies and see what works for me. Now that I am back in the normal routine I am back to meditation, journaling and pre logging.
  • ghrmj
    ghrmj Posts: 86 Member
    sollyn23l2 wrote: »
    I found that for me, it's about being careful about what food I buy and bring into my house. If it's not there, I can't eat it. If you *must* keep it in the house for other people, absolutely keep it put away where you can't see it.

    It's the worst - I had a house full of people over the holidays who like to eat and brought all kinds of tempting things with them. I mean it's not their fault, it is my fault and my responsibility to control myself I can't expect anyone else to do that for me. I have asked my husband to be a little more careful about what he brings into the house, he tends to buy things because he knows I like them, but he can take it or leave it and has treats in moderation, so I end up eating most of it.
  • ghrmj
    ghrmj Posts: 86 Member
    I logged two full days - yesterday and today and came up to 1600+ calories each day. Not sure how I could go lower than that, so I am going to stick to 1600 - 1700 for a while and see how that goes. I seem to have a lot of fat calories so potentially I could cut back on olive oil I guess - but I use it a lot for cooking not sure I want to take all the enjoyment out of my food.
    I think my diary is open if anyone would like to offer advice. (Note: this is not how I have been eating to gain the weight back, this is how I eat when I stick to plan. This is basically how my meals are but it is the junk and snack food that does me in.)
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    ghrmj wrote: »
    I logged two full days - yesterday and today and came up to 1600+ calories each day. Not sure how I could go lower than that, so I am going to stick to 1600 - 1700 for a while and see how that goes. I seem to have a lot of fat calories so potentially I could cut back on olive oil I guess - but I use it a lot for cooking not sure I want to take all the enjoyment out of my food.
    I think my diary is open if anyone would like to offer advice. (Note: this is not how I have been eating to gain the weight back, this is how I eat when I stick to plan. This is basically how my meals are but it is the junk and snack food that does me in.)

    No, your diary isn't open. You can make it public here: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/account/diary_settings

    I cut down on oil when cooking some foods by using oil spray and a high quality non-stick pan. I often have to wash an extra pan and am fine with it - my non-stick sauté pan is better for sautéing than the pot the recipe is going to end up in so I no longer try to save a pan (and use more oil in the stainless steel pot.)

    If 1600-1700 works for you, that's great. But since you are almost 6' tall, do keep an eye out for that amount of calories causing you to feel deprived and leading to overeating. In that cause, you'd have more success with a consistent smaller deficit than not being able to maintain a larger deficit.

    Heather talks about this often in her Half Size Me podcast:

    https://www.halfsizeme.com/category/podcast/
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,598 Member
    ghrmj wrote: »
    I logged two full days - yesterday and today and came up to 1600+ calories each day. Not sure how I could go lower than that, so I am going to stick to 1600 - 1700 for a while and see how that goes. I seem to have a lot of fat calories so potentially I could cut back on olive oil I guess - but I use it a lot for cooking not sure I want to take all the enjoyment out of my food.
    I think my diary is open if anyone would like to offer advice. (Note: this is not how I have been eating to gain the weight back, this is how I eat when I stick to plan. This is basically how my meals are but it is the junk and snack food that does me in.)

    Diary's not open to non-friends.

    Some general thoughts on what you wrote:

    Is it 1600-1700 that you've been eating, when reporting losses earlier in this thread (around a pound a week, IIRC)? If so, that's a good rate of loss. Working with the hints along the way in this thread (6' tall, 220 pounds at the start, age 57), we'd expect your sedentary TDEE to be around 1900-some at sedentary. In theory, that would make 1600-1700 around half a pound a week loss - which will take time to show up on the scale - but individuals do vary (up or down) from the population-average calculator estimates. Slow but sustainable is fine. Even half a pound a week is 26 pounds in a year.

    Can you experiment with reducing by not eliminating the olive oil, if you haven't already done that? Also, when you review your diary, are there other fat sources that are less important to your satisfaction/happiness than the olive oil? I've greatly reduced the amount of oil I use in cooking, and am still happy with the results . . . but I neither find it captivatingly delicious nor especially sating, so that was probably an easier reduction for me than it would be for you. (I prefer to use things like tamari, yuzu, miso, peri-peri sauce, salsa and a raft of other things to add flavor to foods, vs. oils. Your mileage will vary, for sure.)

    On the snack food front, are there alternative snacks you can find that you enjoy that either are a little lower calorie than your current common choices, or current ones that you can enjoy in smaller portions (maybe a "eat X grams, wait 20 minutes while distracting oneself" rule - that kind of thing helps some people)?

    Some people - I'm one - do better limiting snacks by using pre-portioned ones (yes, costs more and more wasteful packaging). I can handle a individual ice cream cup (I like the Breyer's 100 calorie which are tiny), but if I have a big package in the freezer, I'm more likely to upsize my portion by lots. (One of my current yums is one of those tiny Breyer's vanilla ice cream cups topped with pomegranate molasses, which is surprisingly calorie efficient for its flavor impact).)

    Another option is to look for snacks you enjoy eating that are better contributors to nutrition. They may not be nutritional superstars, but even a bit of extra nutrition can make them easier to fit into an overall calorie-efficient, tasty, overall nutritious day. Just as examples, even though your choices might be different: Since protein is one of my "pay attention" macros (as a vegetarian) I like frozen yogurt bars (especially mint chip and cookie dough) that are about 110 calories but have 5 grams of protein; black bean tortilla chips at 130 calories with 5g protein; and crispy broad beans at 100 calories with 7g protein.

    Those aren't nutrition superstars, but the bit of extra nutrition helps me include them in my eating more often. Like I said, those are just my examples - your goals and choices would differ.

    Best wishes!
  • ghrmj
    ghrmj Posts: 86 Member
    kshama2001 wrote: »
    ghrmj wrote: »
    I logged two full days - yesterday and today and came up to 1600+ calories each day. Not sure how I could go lower than that, so I am going to stick to 1600 - 1700 for a while and see how that goes. I seem to have a lot of fat calories so potentially I could cut back on olive oil I guess - but I use it a lot for cooking not sure I want to take all the enjoyment out of my food.
    I think my diary is open if anyone would like to offer advice. (Note: this is not how I have been eating to gain the weight back, this is how I eat when I stick to plan. This is basically how my meals are but it is the junk and snack food that does me in.)

    No, your diary isn't open. You can make it public here: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/account/diary_settings

    I cut down on oil when cooking some foods by using oil spray and a high quality non-stick pan. I often have to wash an extra pan and am fine with it - my non-stick sauté pan is better for sautéing than the pot the recipe is going to end up in so I no longer try to save a pan (and use more oil in the stainless steel pot.)

    If 1600-1700 works for you, that's great. But since you are almost 6' tall, do keep an eye out for that amount of calories causing you to feel deprived and leading to overeating. In that cause, you'd have more success with a consistent smaller deficit than not being able to maintain a larger deficit.

    Heather talks about this often in her Half Size Me podcast:

    https://www.halfsizeme.com/category/podcast/

    Oh my profile was open not my diary. I fixed it. I do cook a lot with olive oil, and have it on my salads. Like yesterday for dinner I cooked fish in olive oil & garlic, air fried green beans tossed in oil, and had it on my salad. That is probably too much I should probably find other ways to cook, or maybe at least make an oil free dressing.
  • ghrmj
    ghrmj Posts: 86 Member
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    ghrmj wrote: »
    I logged two full days - yesterday and today and came up to 1600+ calories each day. Not sure how I could go lower than that, so I am going to stick to 1600 - 1700 for a while and see how that goes. I seem to have a lot of fat calories so potentially I could cut back on olive oil I guess - but I use it a lot for cooking not sure I want to take all the enjoyment out of my food.
    I think my diary is open if anyone would like to offer advice. (Note: this is not how I have been eating to gain the weight back, this is how I eat when I stick to plan. This is basically how my meals are but it is the junk and snack food that does me in.)

    Diary's not open to non-friends.

    Some general thoughts on what you wrote:

    Is it 1600-1700 that you've been eating, when reporting losses earlier in this thread (around a pound a week, IIRC)? If so, that's a good rate of loss. Working with the hints along the way in this thread (6' tall, 220 pounds at the start, age 57), we'd expect your sedentary TDEE to be around 1900-some at sedentary. In theory, that would make 1600-1700 around half a pound a week loss - which will take time to show up on the scale - but individuals do vary (up or down) from the population-average calculator estimates. Slow but sustainable is fine. Even half a pound a week is 26 pounds in a year.

    Can you experiment with reducing by not eliminating the olive oil, if you haven't already done that? Also, when you review your diary, are there other fat sources that are less important to your satisfaction/happiness than the olive oil? I've greatly reduced the amount of oil I use in cooking, and am still happy with the results . . . but I neither find it captivatingly delicious nor especially sating, so that was probably an easier reduction for me than it would be for you. (I prefer to use things like tamari, yuzu, miso, peri-peri sauce, salsa and a raft of other things to add flavor to foods, vs. oils. Your mileage will vary, for sure.)

    On the snack food front, are there alternative snacks you can find that you enjoy that either are a little lower calorie than your current common choices, or current ones that you can enjoy in smaller portions (maybe a "eat X grams, wait 20 minutes while distracting oneself" rule - that kind of thing helps some people)?

    Some people - I'm one - do better limiting snacks by using pre-portioned ones (yes, costs more and more wasteful packaging). I can handle a individual ice cream cup (I like the Breyer's 100 calorie which are tiny), but if I have a big package in the freezer, I'm more likely to upsize my portion by lots. (One of my current yums is one of those tiny Breyer's vanilla ice cream cups topped with pomegranate molasses, which is surprisingly calorie efficient for its flavor impact).)

    Another option is to look for snacks you enjoy eating that are better contributors to nutrition. They may not be nutritional superstars, but even a bit of extra nutrition can make them easier to fit into an overall calorie-efficient, tasty, overall nutritious day. Just as examples, even though your choices might be different: Since protein is one of my "pay attention" macros (as a vegetarian) I like frozen yogurt bars (especially mint chip and cookie dough) that are about 110 calories but have 5 grams of protein; black bean tortilla chips at 130 calories with 5g protein; and crispy broad beans at 100 calories with 7g protein.

    Those aren't nutrition superstars, but the bit of extra nutrition helps me include them in my eating more often. Like I said, those are just my examples - your goals and choices would differ.

    Best wishes!

    My profile was public not my diary - I changed it. I think I was eating around that amount, but I wasn't tracking super consistently.

    I also did 20 minutes each on the treadmill and spin bike each day, and some weights, which I plan to continue, and I walk my dog 30 minutes (she's 13.5 so it's not a great workout - but something :smiley: ) so that will add to my deficit as well.

    Olive oil I cook with almost every day both for sauteeing and in the air fryer as well as salads - looking at my diary it is a lot of calories so I will have to find a way to reduce that.

    Snacks are my downfall and that is where I binge. I am probably better not having them at all. Today I did some cheese and crackers and stuffed dates, they are things that are OK for me to moderate. Anything processed or sugary I am going to try to just stay away from.

    Thanks everyone for supporting a random stranger here, it must be frustrating to listen to the same things over and over. :)
  • PAV8888
    PAV8888 Posts: 14,300 Member
    Olive and other oils... use really does depend on how satiating they are for you.

    They are high calorie; but they can also be satiating.

    One day three years into using MFP while I was weighing my 5 or 6g of olive oil that I was going to use on my salad I noticed that it smelled a bit rancid. Which spelled the end of that bottle. And I realized that its replacement would be the first bottle of olive oil that I would buy since I'd lost weight. Before losing weight I used to buy **several** bottles per year.

    That's the beauty of counting calories. You can review what's worth it and what isn't worth the calories to you AT THIS TIME. And you are even allowed to re-review your position and make further changes. Even to backtrack. Consciously. While meeting your goals! GO YOU! :wink:
  • ghrmj
    ghrmj Posts: 86 Member
    I think I will use this thread and leave my diary open for accountability - I think it helps me stick to plan a bit to kind of "put it out there" in writing. So today my current weight is 218.4. I am going out for brunch so will have to work around that for the rest of the day. Already did my treadmill/bike this morning, and having just a protein shake to keep me going until brunch so I'm not famished when I get there. :)
  • ghrmj
    ghrmj Posts: 86 Member
    PAV8888 wrote: »
    Olive and other oils... use really does depend on how satiating they are for you.

    They are high calorie; but they can also be satiating.

    One day three years into using MFP while I was weighing my 5 or 6g of olive oil that I was going to use on my salad I noticed that it smelled a bit rancid. Which spelled the end of that bottle. And I realized that its replacement would be the first bottle of olive oil that I would buy since I'd lost weight. Before losing weight I used to buy **several** bottles per year.

    That's the beauty of counting calories. You can review what's worth it and what isn't worth the calories to you AT THIS TIME. And you are even allowed to re-review your position and make further changes. Even to backtrack. Consciously. While meeting your goals! GO YOU! :wink:

    Yeah they really make a difference in enjoyment for me for my eggs, and sauteed and air fried veggies. I think I have recipes for some oil free salad dressings though so I will start trying to cut back on that side of it and see how I like that.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    edited January 2023
    ghrmj wrote: »
    kshama2001 wrote: »
    ghrmj wrote: »
    I logged two full days - yesterday and today and came up to 1600+ calories each day. Not sure how I could go lower than that, so I am going to stick to 1600 - 1700 for a while and see how that goes. I seem to have a lot of fat calories so potentially I could cut back on olive oil I guess - but I use it a lot for cooking not sure I want to take all the enjoyment out of my food.
    I think my diary is open if anyone would like to offer advice. (Note: this is not how I have been eating to gain the weight back, this is how I eat when I stick to plan. This is basically how my meals are but it is the junk and snack food that does me in.)

    No, your diary isn't open. You can make it public here: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/account/diary_settings

    I cut down on oil when cooking some foods by using oil spray and a high quality non-stick pan. I often have to wash an extra pan and am fine with it - my non-stick sauté pan is better for sautéing than the pot the recipe is going to end up in so I no longer try to save a pan (and use more oil in the stainless steel pot.)

    If 1600-1700 works for you, that's great. But since you are almost 6' tall, do keep an eye out for that amount of calories causing you to feel deprived and leading to overeating. In that cause, you'd have more success with a consistent smaller deficit than not being able to maintain a larger deficit.

    Heather talks about this often in her Half Size Me podcast:

    https://www.halfsizeme.com/category/podcast/

    Oh my profile was open not my diary. I fixed it. I do cook a lot with olive oil, and have it on my salads. Like yesterday for dinner I cooked fish in olive oil & garlic, air fried green beans tossed in oil, and had it on my salad. That is probably too much I should probably find other ways to cook, or maybe at least make an oil free dressing.

    Your diary is open, thanks. The meal you mentioned was Thursday. I suggest you find an oil entry that includes grams, use that, and weigh all calorie dense foods like oil.

    I really like EVOO in salad, but only have 7 grams. I add 40-50 grams of fat free cottage cheese to my salad dressing. The oil plus cottage cheese makes my brain think I am having a higher fat dressing.

    With a non-stick pan you could reduce the oil for sautéing, or consider roasting the fish and green beans in the oven. (Still toss the green beans in oil, but less of it.) I often use parchment paper on a sheet pan, which reduces or eliminates the need for oil.
  • nsk1951
    nsk1951 Posts: 1,304 Member
    edited January 2023
    Ran across your thread today and read through all 3 pages of it ... and found some thoughts racing through my head of spots that reminded me of myself and the struggles I've been working with as I work on my own weight loss journey. Good luck to you, keep trying and searching.

    Just one thing: these are the points that specifically reminded me of myself ... at the very beginning, you said you carry excess weight around the middle, later you said you tend to binge eat in the evenings and would get frustrated and angry with yourself, and then that you have no problem after dinner but struggle in the afternoon before dinner ... and later; that if you were to make drastic changes it would be processed carbs that you would try cutting out because you tend to over indulge on them. And that you literally eat things that you know AS you eat them that you shouldn't and don't even want them anyway; that it was honestly embarrassing at this point ... Yep, all the things I have said to myself about myself! ... And here is why I point these out ... Has your doctor ever tested your glucose tolerance? Could it be that you have become, now that you are post-menopausal, insulin resistant?

    Of course, I spotted those items because they are my sometimes my own demons! ... I am 78 years old and have been on a lose/regain/re-lose struggle since I was your age. I became insulin resistant when I went through early menopause in my 40's ... and I was, at that time, very relaxed and indulgent on the snacks I ate ... every day I enjoyed whichever ones I wanted ... chips, cookies, cakes, candy, ice cream, pretzels, donuts .. any of them. I had always been able to enjoy those foods whenever I wanted to have them and never had a problem with eating too much of any of them .. until suddenly I found myself eating the whole thing instead of one portion ... And struggling to keep my weight in check. Eventually I became diabetic and have had to cut those foods from my list of edibles. ... I still cannot have any of them without overeating. I never have any problem with overeating when I eat 'regular' food. ... that's my story. Thanks for sharing yours. Again. Good luck.
  • mtaratoot
    mtaratoot Posts: 14,372 Member
    kshama2001 wrote: »
    <snip>
    I suggest you find an oil entry that includes grams, use that, and weigh all calorie dense foods like oil.

    You can easily convert grams of olive oil to ml. One gram of EVOO is 1.11 ml. If I weigh out ten grams, I log eleven ml.

  • DebbsSeattle
    DebbsSeattle Posts: 125 Member
    I have been on a roasted veg kick as of late. We used to just douse our veg in oil. Now I measure out a tablespoon, rub it in my hands and rub all the veg in the bowl before placing on the baking sheet.

    I also would suggest telling your dearest to keep the snack foods out of the house because your health is very important to you. So thanks for thinking of me…I do love those “fave snack food entered here”, but I need to succeed at this new eating plan.

    Give it 5 minutes. When the urge (that I completely recognize by the way) to shove 5 chocolates in your mouth hits, look at the clock, go grab 7 raw, unsalted almonds (~49 calories) chew them slowly until they turn to nothing, pour a glass of water (I like 12 ounces) and drink it. Go brush your teeth with extra minty paste and mouthwash. Did 5 minutes pass. Is the urge gone? Go for a 15 minute walk as brisk as you can muster. Drink a water. Is the urge gone? If your sodium is not a problem for your daily, try adding a teaspoon of soy sauce to your green tea or jasmine tea. You can also consider a collagen peptides powder like Vital Proteins to add to your tea too. 35 calories for one scoop, 9 grams of protein. Consider trying a MCT oil (medium chain triglyceride oil from coconuts) that has multiple positive benefits including staving off hunger and cravings. A teaspoon of the oil - 40 calories, the scoop of protein powder - 35 calories, and soy sauce - 5 calories, make it like a hot soup broth snack that can kill the urge but preserve appetite and calories for a healthful supper. Sometimes we confuse thirst as hunger urges or false cravings. Make sure you are drinking enough pure, unadulterated water in addition to caffeine containing tea. Remember, one caffeine serving cancels one pure water serving. You should end the day with no fewer than 48 ounces net pure water consumed. Sometimes as we burn fat, excess hormones stored in the fat gets released and triggers those urges and cravings. Sometimes we (our body/stomach) just is bored. “Mom…I’m bored…there’s nothing to do but eat”. Take up knitting or crochet…busy hands, busy mind.

    Some people have shortened their eating window with intermittent fasting and report far fewer cravings and urges. We currently follow 16 hours off eating, 8 hours of food eating time. It naturally fits our life. We recently did a well researched extended fast. When I was having hunger pangs, I did physical activity until I raised my heart rate. Sometimes I would do 2 minutes and be good but next time I had to do 2 minutes, 5 times to kill the beast within.

    Taking fresh veg to eat on your commute home could be good along with an ounce of full fat cheese. Could be just enough to stave off the binge when you get home.

    Try daily weigh ins each morning. Consider a body composition scale that provides added feedback more than just weight alone especially if you are pursuing a fitness routine. Your fat may go down but muscle gain offsets the loss so it looks like you are “not succeeding” when in fact you ARE. Take your vital measurements once a week…hips waist bust. More if you want, log them in MFP along with your weight. Hang your next size down pants next to your bed…try them on first thing each morning and also every time you get the craving binge urge. Phone a friend…when the binge demon rears it’s ugly head, pick up the phone and call someone…they may need the boost more than you do.

    We have most likely, all experienced this food binge issue. I would love to never feel it again myself. BUT, I’m the only one in my head when it happens…it’s up to me to fight and overcome…the above is what I have in my arsenal of tools. They work 95% of the time. Hope you can glean something from it. Cheers.
  • PAV8888
    PAV8888 Posts: 14,300 Member
    edited January 2023
    mtaratoot wrote: »
    <snip>
    Remember, one caffeine serving cancels one pure water serving.

    Not true. Coffee counts towards your daily hydration.
    You should end the day with no fewer than 48 ounces net pure water consumed.

    Also not exactly true. You do need to stay hydrated, but not over-hydrated. The "eight glasses of water per day" "rule" is a myth. You get water from fruit, foods, coffee, tea, and anything with water in it. Look at the color of your urine to see if you are hydrated. If it's light yellow or straw colored, you are hydrated enough. If you are taking Vitamin B-2 (riboflaven) or a B-complex supplement, it can color your urine bright yellow even if you are hydrated.

    I liked a lot of the ideas in that post--many are definitely worth exploring-- but these two also jumped out at me.

    Thank you for typing this out! :wink:
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,598 Member
    edited January 2023
    Some excellent advice in PP about ideas for managing cravings and appetite.

    But a couple of quibbles:
    . . . consider a collagen peptides powder like Vital Proteins to add to your tea too. 35 calories for one scoop, 9 grams of protein.

    Collagen peptides per se are not a completely protein. They lack at least one essential amino acid (EAA), tryptophan. Complete protein would be more beneficial IMO, unless it just so happens that a person is already getting extra already of the EAA missing from collagen peptides. I'm not saying they're bad, but I think that's a relevant thing to realize. Some collagen peptides supplements are fortified with tryptophan, which may help.

    Try daily weigh ins each morning. Consider a body composition scale that provides added feedback more than just weight alone especially if you are pursuing a fitness routine. Your fat may go down but muscle gain offsets the loss so it looks like you are “not succeeding” when in fact you ARE.

    I'm a big fan of daily weigh ins (plus a weight trending app like Libra for Android, Happy Scale for Apple/iOS, Trendweight, Weightgrapher, etc. . . . even though those just do some statistical smoothing, so can sometimes also mislead).

    But home body composition scales - bioelectrical impedance analysis (BIA) scales - are notoriously inaccurate. They can establish a body composition trend line over time (if one ignores outlier readings), but the absolute values can be very wrong.

    More importantly: Muscle mass gain is a thing of time and patience. (A thing that makes me sad, TBH.)

    Two pounds per month of muscle mass gain would be a very good result achievable under near-ideal conditions. Ideal conditions would include a good progressive strength training program faithfully performed, good overall nutrition (especially but not exclusively ample protein), relative youth, relative maleness, favorable genetics, a calorie surplus, perhaps relative newness to strength training, among other factors.

    I'm not saying no muscle mass can be gained under less than ideal conditions, but it's a good bet that it would happen slower than 2 pounds of mass gain per month.

    On the flip side, 2 pounds a month - half a pound a week - is about the slowest satisfying rate of fat loss most people would accept, and even that can take multiple weeks to show up on the scale amongst normal multi-pound daily fluctuations in water weight and digestive contents en route to becoming waste. From personal experience, a really slow fat loss rate can hide from even those weight trending apps for a month or more.

    The inescapable conclusion is that any realistic rate of muscle mass gain is very unlikely to outpace any reasonably satisfying rate of fat loss.

    I wish it were not so. Fervently.

    Sometimes people are deceived because strength gain can be quite rapid at first. But those early strength gains are primarily from neuromuscular adaptation - better recruiting and using muscle fibers we already have. As that source of strength improvement gets tapped out, the mass gains are more likely to get moving . . . gradually.

    Also misleading: A new strength training routine tends to add water weight, loosely for muscle repair, which does tend to play peek a boo on the scale with fat loss for a while. That water retention can also give a bit of a pumped or toned appearance to the relevant muscles, also leading folks to believe they've gained mass.

    Strength training is a great thing for many reasons, but it requires patient persistence. Not least, it can help us keep what muscle mass we already have, and - perhaps surprisingly to some - overweight/obese people can have more muscle mass than otherwise similar-activity lighter people, simply from carrying that weight through daily life. Since muscle is slow to gain, keeping what we have is a great thing!

    The potential for muscle mass gain to mask fat loss amongst dedicate fat-loss dieters is over-rated, as is - according to research I've read - the metabolic boost from the added muscle at rest. The best estimates of that boost from researchers tend to run in the 2-6 calories per pound of extra muscle per day, at rest. Anecdotally, it does seem to be that more muscular people burn more calories than those of similar size but less muscular . . . but I'd suspect the reason is more that moving is easier and more fun with a bit more muscle, so those who are fitter move more without really thinking about it, maybe not even realizing it.

    Definitely strength training is a good plan for any of us, but I don't want people to be misled about the pace or reasonable expectations.
  • ghrmj
    ghrmj Posts: 86 Member
    kshama2001 wrote: »
    ghrmj wrote: »
    kshama2001 wrote: »
    ghrmj wrote: »
    I logged two full days - yesterday and today and came up to 1600+ calories each day. Not sure how I could go lower than that, so I am going to stick to 1600 - 1700 for a while and see how that goes. I seem to have a lot of fat calories so potentially I could cut back on olive oil I guess - but I use it a lot for cooking not sure I want to take all the enjoyment out of my food.
    I think my diary is open if anyone would like to offer advice. (Note: this is not how I have been eating to gain the weight back, this is how I eat when I stick to plan. This is basically how my meals are but it is the junk and snack food that does me in.)

    No, your diary isn't open. You can make it public here: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/account/diary_settings

    I cut down on oil when cooking some foods by using oil spray and a high quality non-stick pan. I often have to wash an extra pan and am fine with it - my non-stick sauté pan is better for sautéing than the pot the recipe is going to end up in so I no longer try to save a pan (and use more oil in the stainless steel pot.)

    If 1600-1700 works for you, that's great. But since you are almost 6' tall, do keep an eye out for that amount of calories causing you to feel deprived and leading to overeating. In that cause, you'd have more success with a consistent smaller deficit than not being able to maintain a larger deficit.

    Heather talks about this often in her Half Size Me podcast:

    https://www.halfsizeme.com/category/podcast/

    Oh my profile was open not my diary. I fixed it. I do cook a lot with olive oil, and have it on my salads. Like yesterday for dinner I cooked fish in olive oil & garlic, air fried green beans tossed in oil, and had it on my salad. That is probably too much I should probably find other ways to cook, or maybe at least make an oil free dressing.

    Your diary is open, thanks. The meal you mentioned was Thursday. I suggest you find an oil entry that includes grams, use that, and weigh all calorie dense foods like oil.

    I really like EVOO in salad, but only have 7 grams. I add 40-50 grams of fat free cottage cheese to my salad dressing. The oil plus cottage cheese makes my brain think I am having a higher fat dressing.

    With a non-stick pan you could reduce the oil for sautéing, or consider roasting the fish and green beans in the oven. (Still toss the green beans in oil, but less of it.) I often use parchment paper on a sheet pan, which reduces or eliminates the need for oil.

    I despise cottage cheese :) - but I get your point. I will be experimenting and making adjustments going forwards.
  • ghrmj
    ghrmj Posts: 86 Member
    nsk1951 wrote: »
    Ran across your thread today and read through all 3 pages of it ... and found some thoughts racing through my head of spots that reminded me of myself and the struggles I've been working with as I work on my own weight loss journey. Good luck to you, keep trying and searching.

    Just one thing: these are the points that specifically reminded me of myself ... at the very beginning, you said you carry excess weight around the middle, later you said you tend to binge eat in the evenings and would get frustrated and angry with yourself, and then that you have no problem after dinner but struggle in the afternoon before dinner ... and later; that if you were to make drastic changes it would be processed carbs that you would try cutting out because you tend to over indulge on them. And that you literally eat things that you know AS you eat them that you shouldn't and don't even want them anyway; that it was honestly embarrassing at this point ... Yep, all the things I have said to myself about myself! ... And here is why I point these out ... Has your doctor ever tested your glucose tolerance? Could it be that you have become, now that you are post-menopausal, insulin resistant?

    Of course, I spotted those items because they are my sometimes my own demons! ... I am 78 years old and have been on a lose/regain/re-lose struggle since I was your age. I became insulin resistant when I went through early menopause in my 40's ... and I was, at that time, very relaxed and indulgent on the snacks I ate ... every day I enjoyed whichever ones I wanted ... chips, cookies, cakes, candy, ice cream, pretzels, donuts .. any of them. I had always been able to enjoy those foods whenever I wanted to have them and never had a problem with eating too much of any of them .. until suddenly I found myself eating the whole thing instead of one portion ... And struggling to keep my weight in check. Eventually I became diabetic and have had to cut those foods from my list of edibles. ... I still cannot have any of them without overeating. I never have any problem with overeating when I eat 'regular' food. ... that's my story. Thanks for sharing yours. Again. Good luck.

    Thanks it is good to know I am not alone, it is hard to admit some of those thoughts out loud sometimes, it really makes me feel weak and, I don't know, like there is something wrong with me that I can't get a handle on this.

    I think I had my glucose tested with regular blood work during my check ups. My doctor has never mentioned it to me but it might be worth checking in with her to see what she says.
  • ghrmj
    ghrmj Posts: 86 Member
    I have been on a roasted veg kick as of late. We used to just douse our veg in oil. Now I measure out a tablespoon, rub it in my hands and rub all the veg in the bowl before placing on the baking sheet.

    I also would suggest telling your dearest to keep the snack foods out of the house because your health is very important to you. So thanks for thinking of me…I do love those “fave snack food entered here”, but I need to succeed at this new eating plan.

    Give it 5 minutes. When the urge (that I completely recognize by the way) to shove 5 chocolates in your mouth hits, look at the clock, go grab 7 raw, unsalted almonds (~49 calories) chew them slowly until they turn to nothing, pour a glass of water (I like 12 ounces) and drink it. Go brush your teeth with extra minty paste and mouthwash. Did 5 minutes pass. Is the urge gone? Go for a 15 minute walk as brisk as you can muster. Drink a water. Is the urge gone? If your sodium is not a problem for your daily, try adding a teaspoon of soy sauce to your green tea or jasmine tea. You can also consider a collagen peptides powder like Vital Proteins to add to your tea too. 35 calories for one scoop, 9 grams of protein. Consider trying a MCT oil (medium chain triglyceride oil from coconuts) that has multiple positive benefits including staving off hunger and cravings. A teaspoon of the oil - 40 calories, the scoop of protein powder - 35 calories, and soy sauce - 5 calories, make it like a hot soup broth snack that can kill the urge but preserve appetite and calories for a healthful supper. Sometimes we confuse thirst as hunger urges or false cravings. Make sure you are drinking enough pure, unadulterated water in addition to caffeine containing tea. Remember, one caffeine serving cancels one pure water serving. You should end the day with no fewer than 48 ounces net pure water consumed. Sometimes as we burn fat, excess hormones stored in the fat gets released and triggers those urges and cravings. Sometimes we (our body/stomach) just is bored. “Mom…I’m bored…there’s nothing to do but eat”. Take up knitting or crochet…busy hands, busy mind.

    Some people have shortened their eating window with intermittent fasting and report far fewer cravings and urges. We currently follow 16 hours off eating, 8 hours of food eating time. It naturally fits our life. We recently did a well researched extended fast. When I was having hunger pangs, I did physical activity until I raised my heart rate. Sometimes I would do 2 minutes and be good but next time I had to do 2 minutes, 5 times to kill the beast within.

    Taking fresh veg to eat on your commute home could be good along with an ounce of full fat cheese. Could be just enough to stave off the binge when you get home.

    Try daily weigh ins each morning. Consider a body composition scale that provides added feedback more than just weight alone especially if you are pursuing a fitness routine. Your fat may go down but muscle gain offsets the loss so it looks like you are “not succeeding” when in fact you ARE. Take your vital measurements once a week…hips waist bust. More if you want, log them in MFP along with your weight. Hang your next size down pants next to your bed…try them on first thing each morning and also every time you get the craving binge urge. Phone a friend…when the binge demon rears it’s ugly head, pick up the phone and call someone…they may need the boost more than you do.

    We have most likely, all experienced this food binge issue. I would love to never feel it again myself. BUT, I’m the only one in my head when it happens…it’s up to me to fight and overcome…the above is what I have in my arsenal of tools. They work 95% of the time. Hope you can glean something from it. Cheers.

    Thanks for taking the time to share your strategies with me, I will try some of them. The book I'm reading about binge eating says to notice your urges and separate yourself and not act on them - and I'm like "ok if I knew how to do that then I wouldn't be in this situation" lol. So some concrete strategies to use will be helpful. (I do drink water - I just don't log it.)
  • mrsmeteor
    mrsmeteor Posts: 40 Member
    I don't have a whole lot to add, just that if you find yourself coming undone at the end of the day, you may not be eating enough during the day. If the evening calories are coming in the form of snacks, maybe you could change the type of snacks you're eating. Instead of chips or Doritos, try a cheddar rice cake if you like something savory. Maybe a greek yogurt with fruit if the issue is that you're wanting something sweet.

    Don't give up. The results don't come right away and you need to be able to work through the frustrating beginning to the point where the results WILL come, and then that will be the motivator. We can't always see the good things that are starting to happen before they make themselves obvious, but they are happening regardless.
  • karahm78
    karahm78 Posts: 505 Member
    You could try misting your olive oil (like with a Misto), you’d get even coverage with less volume/calories.
  • ahoy_m8
    ahoy_m8 Posts: 3,053 Member
    edited January 2023
    mrsmeteor wrote: »
    I don't have a whole lot to add, just that if you find yourself coming undone at the end of the day, you may not be eating enough during the day. If the evening calories are coming in the form of snacks, maybe you could change the type of snacks you're eating. Instead of chips or Doritos, try a cheddar rice cake if you like something savory. Maybe a greek yogurt with fruit if the issue is that you're wanting something sweet.

    Don't give up. The results don't come right away and you need to be able to work through the frustrating beginning to the point where the results WILL come, and then that will be the motivator. We can't always see the good things that are starting to happen before they make themselves obvious, but they are happening regardless.

    This is such a good post. What if you tried eating most of your calories at the time of day when you're typically most hungry? (I'm hungriest around 3pm and always just plan on a really big nutritious snack then. Although not super hungry early, I get into trouble when I eat too little early because I overcompensate later in the day.) And ditto to the "Don't give up" paragraph!
  • ghrmj
    ghrmj Posts: 86 Member
    ahoy_m8 wrote: »
    mrsmeteor wrote: »
    I don't have a whole lot to add, just that if you find yourself coming undone at the end of the day, you may not be eating enough during the day. If the evening calories are coming in the form of snacks, maybe you could change the type of snacks you're eating. Instead of chips or Doritos, try a cheddar rice cake if you like something savory. Maybe a greek yogurt with fruit if the issue is that you're wanting something sweet.

    Don't give up. The results don't come right away and you need to be able to work through the frustrating beginning to the point where the results WILL come, and then that will be the motivator. We can't always see the good things that are starting to happen before they make themselves obvious, but they are happening regardless.

    This is such a good post. What if you tried eating most of your calories at the time of day when you're typically most hungry? (I'm hungriest around 3pm and always just plan on a really big nutritious snack then. Although not super hungry early, I get into trouble when I eat too little early because I overcompensate later in the day.) And ditto to the "Don't give up" paragraph!

    Yeah maybe I will be like the joke about how retired people eat dinner at 4:30. :) Right now I am working and have to eat around my work/commuting schedule, so after breakfast and lunch if I have too much of a snack after work I won't have enough calories left for dinner (which I have with my spouse around 6:30-7). I'm not making excuses, just kind of trying to wrap my head around how that might work. Maybe I should learn to skip breakfast.
  • LifeChangz
    LifeChangz Posts: 456 Member
    @ghrmj ~ nods... good discussion and appreciate your honesty here - it helps us for talking about these kinds of things.

    so, there's regular eating, regular meals/snacks, regular sized meals, regular food choices, can eat what our body needs, smack our lips and go yum, then stop at enough, push the plate away and go think about and do other things... until the next time we need to eat more regular food for our bodies, that we enjoy.... This would be my goal - and what I practice - and go back to practicing after a crash/binge and during struggles.

    would like to share a couple thoughts

    regarding eating patterns, think of a line - left side, no issues, eat appropriately. right side eating disorder extreme. Lots of in-between area - with all sorts of reasons happen for the eating - some benign just joining in at a party to others that are a problem - like eating extra because we can't resist/stop the urge and struggle emotionally. for me, that is the definition of binge or urge to binge - whether it is a compulsive extra bite of a cookie or fixating on a particular package of candy I saw advertised on tv that I think about for 3 weeks and finally go buy 10 packages of the dang candy.... or whatever my eyeball/thoughts land on for whatever reason....

    read a book "overcoming binge eating" by Fairburn - it helped me identify the particulars of the ways/types of binge eating I do - mine tend to be long, rolling periods of extended overeating that don't seem to be anything more than overeating right up until I try to stop and can't. I did not use his food suggestions in the 2nd 1/2 of the book but found the 1st part helpful in a life changing way because it helped me understand me and helped me to put it into words so I could express it and begin to change it.

    Acknowledging that we have an issue with a particular situation is not defeat. It is a place to start. Make a strategy to try practice that, adjust as needed and keep practicing. It is empowering to acknowledge what the actual problems and patterns are.

    an example you mentioned with hubby - i also talked with hubby several times - gave him separate space in kitchen, tried that, no go, asked him to keep in his areas out of sight - i could find that food too during cleaning so no go, asked him to not bring in house.... we adjust as we go...

    an example - hardest time for me is after dinner. so I schedule in an evening snack, bedtime snack and for a long time, a middle of the night snack. reassured myself i could have those snacks. if i forgot, bonus. over time, i stopped middle of the night eating, bedtime snack and sometimes evening snacks... I notice when I am stressed/distressed the urges come back - so that is an emotional trigger, just like tv ads can be a visual trigger, driving past a fast food joint can smell good and trigger urges.

    that's just our brain doing the old usual reaction to seeing something - we can change that by practicing new ways to do it.... that doesn't mean easy - it just means more practice.

    Our goal/expectation is that the RESULT over time as we practice will be an easing, lessening, evaporation of the problem.... the length/intensity of the binge will ease, the time between binges should increase, we get better at getting back up and stop beating ourselves up... and eventually, look back and realize hey! it's getting better.

    I don't think anything difficult is a 1 and done - anything difficult takes time and practice to (re)learn and do... and improving the ways we eat and how we use food is worth doing well.... and I wish this for you! Cheers :)
  • ghrmj
    ghrmj Posts: 86 Member
    edited January 2023
    @LifeChangz

    Thank you for your post - lots of helpful advice that I will try to implement.

    So this evening before bed I have 1) logged all my food for tomorrow, using the suggestions I have included a larger afternoon/evening snack for when I get home from work, and then a smaller than usual dinner. So the calories will be similar but spread out a little more. 2) Told my husband to GET RID of the tin of Quality Street chocolates he brought out today. That is the last thing I need and I want them out of my sight when I get home tomorrow. :)

    Oh and I am gonna try to water sautee my spinach for dinner. I'll add some nutritional yeast to the meal for flavoring and see how that goes.