Mental Block
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@JLG1986 Thanks for the supportive thoughts! It’s weird how we can want something so bad and simultaneously prevent it from happening.
@bobsburgersfan I’m sorry you relate to this, and the way you describe it is so accurate. That’s exactly what it’s been like, a switch one day, months or sometimes years go by, then it switches again. Mine started sometime last November and it’s now May! I wasn’t losing but at least I wasn’t gaining. Then in Jan/Feb I started to gain and knew I couldn’t let this go on or I’ll undo all the work I’ve done. Fortunately just confronting it on here and getting some really spectacular advice has helped. Got a new scale yesterday and I’m actually interested in using it.2 -
I think there are all kinds of mental games people play that contribute to weight gain in the first place and weeding out those thought patterns and habits is at least half the battle in weight loss. I have the same issue you describe and it’s interesting that you raise it because I’ve been paying attention to my own thoughts recently. Somehow it’s almost as if giving people the right advice on how to do it, is as good as actually doing it. Just one of those sneaky little lies I tell myself without realizing. Unfortunately the results seem to be lacking!
So true. Couldn’t have said it better. Just being able to talk about it and not feel totally alone (and like I’m failing) is encouraging.1 -
Antiopelle wrote: »Antiopelle wrote: »One thing I do to overcome mental blocks and to stay motivated is create and read flash cards. I’ve created them for a lot of mental traps when it comes to dieting. How to cope with cravings, my why’s etc. You could create one with the reasons why you want to weigh your food and how you will cope if you feel you are resisting it. Then read it every day (set a timer in your phone).
Just my two cents…
This is really interesting! I’m making some for my little brother (Big Brothers Big Sisters program) so I’ll just add some for myself as well. I need to strengthen my why and I think this will target that.
I hope you find it helpful. I'm using an app meant to help students called Anki. It reminds me to read my flashcards every day. The first inkling that my thoughts are going off diet again is when I tend to skip the reminder. After almost a year, this is my first alarm that my mindset is changing.
Not just the flashcards themselves, but being a bit annoyed at the reminder ("I don't have the time now" "I know them by heart anyway" "what good will it do" ...) is my red flag and a sign that my healthy eating habits are at risk.
I am sure that this isn't for everyone, certainly not someone with and ED or who is over-obsessing with food, but it sure works for me.
Awesome, I just downloaded the app. I told my husband about it and he downloaded it too so he can practice Italian, so thanks for the pro tip! I tell myself all those excuses as well, but once I see results then I start to love the process and routine. Just wish I wasn’t so defiant on the way there.
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Definitely understand this feeling! Everyone is different so finding what works for you is important in overcoming this I think. For me, I am hugely successful when I'm strict with what I eat and am meticulous with not letting ANYTHING past my lips without it having touched the scales. In terms of 'what I eat' - technically yes, I could accept the biscuit being offered, add the calories and still ensure I'm within my limit, but for me I can remain more committed overall if I say no to food that won't 'benefit' me. If I give in to temptation I know mentally ill be more likely to cave at some point in the future.
I had a blip recently which ruined my willpower - my sister had a birthday party, and I mentally prepared for 'okay, one day of not weighing food and eating and drinking freely isn't gonna destroy my life' - so I did and it was fun. However I stayed over, and in the morning my sister encouraged macdonals breakfast to cure the hangover... I gave in. Then lunchtime came and she was ordering KFC, I said no then changed my mind (only getting 1 piece of chicken, compared to 'old me' bur still!) THEN... dinner time - they're ordering Dominos, same scenario I say no, then FOMO has me getting a small personal pizza. (Love my sister, but a huge part of me becoming the size I am/was is through a period of living with her where this became normality for me, and was a bad habit my glutinous side continued even after moving out.)
Anywho, this blip resulted in a mental block for about a week after. Even though Monday came, and I was like - alright, you've had your treat, smash it! I'd be weighing everything, but then be like 'oh I'll just eat this bit of cheese ad-hoc, what's the harm?' - pointless behaviour that won't help me or my goals. I eventually snapped out of it, though it's been hard.
Long post sorry haha! Just wanted to share what behaviour causes vs controls My own mental block around this stuff.
(Ps I'm visiting her tonight so wish me luck
- I'm taking my own food, but last time I went she opted to order a kebab, so I'm still gonna need prayers sent my way to stay strong haha!) 6 -
@laurenthecarts It’s impressive you got back on track after a week, well done! Not always easy to do but you did it.
That is a tricky situation. You love your sister and want to spend time with her but she enables behaviors that are counterproductive to your goals. I feel for you. Good luck sticking with your own food, you’ve got this. I think it’s a brilliant idea to prepare for success so you won’t need luck. Let me know how it went.1 -
@ddsb1111 I'm glad you felt heard. That's really important. I love the way @vanmep put it about the mental stuff being at least half the battle. I hope some of the advice you've found here will help. That's what's so awesome about the MFP Community! I've learned so much reading threads. Good for you for posting your issue!1
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It’s been a week- quick update. I got my food scale and it took me a day but I opened it. I’ve been using it intermittently, but I guess that’s better than not at all. I’m trying to shift my mind over to- see this isn’t so bad! When I’m using it, it’s in no way complicated or annoying. And Ann’s right, it makes sense to notate it and move on. I just made a sandwich and as y’all know it has multiple components so weighing would typically feel like a burden but I enjoyed it. It’s taken an entire week to get here but I’m hopeful I’ll be in my flow state in another week or two
I still have mental pushback (for sure!) but the more I use it the less of a burden it feels. I’m just so tired of my excuses and I really want to take control over this aspect of my life. The first step was confronting the issue, I truly believe that.
For anyone else feeling stuck or stubborn about using the scale, I get it and I hope this is a reminder that we need to make changes to see changes, even if it takes longer.
I hope you all have a great weekend4 -
UPDATE: 5 weeks exactly 😊
After getting the support, pep talks, and a little tough love like I needed I’m mentally and physically on track. Down 7.2lbs (mind you the first drop was water), and I got out of my own damn way (wow it let me say damn).
Benefits: mental focus, energy, positive attitude, motivated to work on my projects, I feel lighter, less headaches, better sleep, and no phantom hunger or cravings.
If it’s gonna be hard either way, it might as well be hard in the right direction. 59% there.
Thanks everyone9 -
UPDATE: 5 weeks exactly 😊
After getting the support, pep talks, and a little tough love like I needed I’m mentally and physically on track. Down 7.2lbs (mind you the first drop was water), and I got out of my own damn way (wow it let me say damn).
Benefits: mental focus, energy, positive attitude, motivated to work on my projects, I feel lighter, less headaches, better sleep, and no phantom hunger or cravings.
If it’s gonna be hard either way, it might as well be hard in the right direction. 59% there.
Thanks everyone
Good show: This is one of the best things I've read here all day. I'm sincerely very happy for you.
Keep up the goodness, nothing better than seeing someone accomplish their goals!:flowerforyou: 2 -
UPDATE: 5 weeks exactly 😊
After getting the support, pep talks, and a little tough love like I needed I’m mentally and physically on track. Down 7.2lbs (mind you the first drop was water), and I got out of my own damn way (wow it let me say damn).
Benefits: mental focus, energy, positive attitude, motivated to work on my projects, I feel lighter, less headaches, better sleep, and no phantom hunger or cravings.
If it’s gonna be hard either way, it might as well be hard in the right direction. 59% there.
Thanks everyone
Good show: This is one of the best things I've read here all day. I'm sincerely very happy for you.
Keep up the goodness, nothing better than seeing someone accomplish their goals!:flowerforyou:
TY ☺️. It was a 7 month backslide so I’m relieved I reached out and applied the advice. The momentum is more exhilarating with each passing week.2 -
I don't find weighing and measuring necessary. If I am eating healthy, and logging, then I eat sooooo much healthier than my usual diet. If weighing and measuring does not feel like a sustainable habit to you, then try it without. If you are satisfied with your progress, then keep doing what works.1
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I don't find weighing and measuring necessary. If I am eating healthy, and logging, then I eat sooooo much healthier than my usual diet. If weighing and measuring does not feel like a sustainable habit to you, then try it without. If you are satisfied with your progress, then keep doing what works.
Thank you for your feedback 🙏🏻0 -
I finally started weighing my food regularly when A) I couldn't lose weight without doing it, and
I put my scale somewhere extremely convenient and obvious so I didn't have to take it out and put it away every time I weighed my stuff.
Once in a while when I'm super tired and usually after I've worked out harder than I meant to, I go crazy and eat (usually pistachios or pumpkin seeds for some reason) without weighing them. Other than that I weigh every time.
Once it's a routine, it becomes a lot easier.2 -
I don't find weighing and measuring necessary. If I am eating healthy, and logging, then I eat sooooo much healthier than my usual diet. If weighing and measuring does not feel like a sustainable habit to you, then try it without. If you are satisfied with your progress, then keep doing what works.
Hubby is also like that and can eat without logging and lose weight, but his 'calories out' are much higher than mine. We both eat healthy foods 95% of the time; just the occasional cookie or beer from time to time. But if I don't weigh everything, then I simply eat too much of the healthy stuff. I can easily eat double the amounts I'm supposed to, so for me there simply is no other way than weighing everything unfortunately. And I guess that a lot of people - certainly around goal weight - are the same.2 -
When I started i weighed and measured everything. Now in maintenance I don't often, usually when I'm making burgers or something to get the size even. I do weigh myself every day and if I see a trend up will go back to weighing and being more careful with portions, usually just being more mindful does the job. I do log meals in advance for the week so have a relaxed idea of what my calories are.3
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14 week update from original post:
5/13: No weigh-in
Symptoms: Totally shut down
5/25: 138.6 lbs (highest)
Symptoms: headaches, tired, bloated, brain fog, unmotivated, depressed, hungry, insomnia
8/18: 126.0 lbs
Symptoms: less frequent headaches, more energy, active, interested in playing sports and learning new hobbies, inspired to get dressed for the day, better sleep, positive
Weight loss: -12.6 lbs (or .9 lbs per week)
Changes I made:
- I started using a food scale and gradually improved my logging until it became a habit. It took several weeks to get in the swing of it. I was mentally prepared that I wouldn’t be perfect but I wasn’t going to give up. Once I got in the zone I noticed I started getting control of my hunger again.
- I switched my IF window to OMAD because it works better for me during the summer.
- Completely cut out snacking.
- Drinking a lot of water! Keeping jugs of ice water available at all times surprisingly made me feel more awake/aware/alert
-Spending time outside. Getting fresh air and some vitamin D improved my mood.
Foods I avoided: Nothing off limits
Cravings before: high fat, high salt, snack foods, I wanted to eat out a lot, alcohol
Cravings now: I want to eat at home, craving vibrant salads, fish, rice, pasta, bruschetta, all types of veggies, an occasional Fresca for sweetness, watermelon, grapes, pineapple, steak and chicken veggie bowls, light, bright, and refreshing flavors instead of the dense heavy food before.
Biggest take away: Logging and deciding that no matter how long it takes I wasn’t going to give up until I created the habit. Once that felt comfortable I started adding more activity and other changes one by one. AND, weighing myself consistently (almost every day) at the same time to watch my weight trend. This helped me learn what to expect and what normal fluctuations look like.11 -
I should have been more clear, apologies. No I’m not getting results and it’s because I’m eyeballing too much. My advice for others would be, might wanna weigh for a bit to get a handle on it. BUT, I’m not taking that same advice because of some mental block. I don’t know why it’s there or what to do. So, I came here hoping there was some strategies or explanations others have found for the same problem.
I'm guessing the mental block is because you are worried about what the weighing will show you and then you'll either have to buckle down or decide to NOT buckle down, or if it IS correct then there's another factor that you'll have to figure out. Either way, you'll be confronted with information that will force a decision on your part and you are avoiding that.
Sorry if that was blunt. I've been there.1 -
I should have been more clear, apologies. No I’m not getting results and it’s because I’m eyeballing too much. My advice for others would be, might wanna weigh for a bit to get a handle on it. BUT, I’m not taking that same advice because of some mental block. I don’t know why it’s there or what to do. So, I came here hoping there was some strategies or explanations others have found for the same problem.
Here's a definition for mental block I found on the internet: "A mental block is a psychological obstacle or limiting mindset that prevents you from completing important tasks and achieving success. Mental blocks are invisible barriers standing in the way of your productivity." This came from an article that I am going to read as soon as I finish this comment. https://www.wrike.com/blog/how-overcome-mental-blocks/#:~:text=A mental block is a,the way of your productivity.
I have this issue with SO many things in my life. And the hard news is that I tend to be lazy and don't like to work too hard on boring things. (Sometimes, self knowledge is not very pretty.) For example, I know that if I deal with the dishes right away, after every meal, they will not pile up in the sink and spill over onto the countertops. But I don't wanna. So, at the end of the week, every dish I own is dirty, and I pay the price for not doing what I know to do. Too bad I can't eyeball my dishes, right? But I know that if I make the task easy, I am more inclined to do it.
I am pretty good about weighing my food because I've made it easy. (I've learned from watching far too many cooking shows, that weighing food/ingredients is much more accurate than using measuring spoons and cups.) KEY: I keep my scale on the counter where I plate my food. It is a visual reminder to weigh the damn food. If it's tucked away in a drawer or cupboard, I won't see it and I won't weight the damn food. Your mileage may vary.
Sometimes, I just need to sit myself down and give myself a good, stern talking to. I usually know exactly why I'm not doing what I know I need to be doing. (See above about not liking to work hard.) Sometimes I need to reassess my goals and priorities. Sometimes I need to give myself rewards for doing what I know needs to be done. Sometimes I just need to make it easier to do the thing. Best wishes.
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14 week update from original post:
5/13: No weigh-in
Symptoms: Totally shut down
5/25: 138.6 lbs (highest)
Symptoms: headaches, tired, bloated, brain fog, unmotivated, depressed, hungry, insomnia
8/18: 126.0 lbs
Symptoms: less frequent headaches, more energy, active, interested in playing sports and learning new hobbies, inspired to get dressed for the day, better sleep, positive
Weight loss: -12.6 lbs (or .9 lbs per week)
Changes I made:
- I started using a food scale and gradually improved my logging until it became a habit. It took several weeks to get in the swing of it. I was mentally prepared that I wouldn’t be perfect but I wasn’t going to give up. Once I got in the zone I noticed I started getting control of my hunger again.
- I switched my IF window to OMAD because it works better for me during the summer.
- Completely cut out snacking.
- Drinking a lot of water! Keeping jugs of ice water available at all times surprisingly made me feel more awake/aware/alert
-Spending time outside. Getting fresh air and some vitamin D improved my mood.
Foods I avoided: Nothing off limits
Cravings before: high fat, high salt, snack foods, I wanted to eat out a lot, alcohol
Cravings now: I want to eat at home, craving vibrant salads, fish, rice, pasta, bruschetta, all types of veggies, an occasional Fresca for sweetness, watermelon, grapes, pineapple, steak and chicken veggie bowls, light, bright, and refreshing flavors instead of the dense heavy food before.
Biggest take away: Logging and deciding that no matter how long it takes I wasn’t going to give up until I created the habit. Once that felt comfortable I started adding more activity and other changes one by one. AND, weighing myself consistently (almost every day) at the same time to watch my weight trend. This helped me learn what to expect and what normal fluctuations look like.
Wonderful update!
The personal mental commitment is a really big deal, IMO & IME . . . and I think the only option is to find it inside ourselves. Other people can offer ideas, but they can't do it for us.
Congratulations on flipping that switch in your own life. It sounds like you're already reaping the rewards. You're a great example for others: Good show! :flowerforyou:1 -
I should have been more clear, apologies. No I’m not getting results and it’s because I’m eyeballing too much. My advice for others would be, might wanna weigh for a bit to get a handle on it. BUT, I’m not taking that same advice because of some mental block. I don’t know why it’s there or what to do. So, I came here hoping there was some strategies or explanations others have found for the same problem.
I'm guessing the mental block is because you are worried about what the weighing will show you and then you'll either have to buckle down or decide to NOT buckle down, or if it IS correct then there's another factor that you'll have to figure out. Either way, you'll be confronted with information that will force a decision on your part and you are avoiding that.
Sorry if that was blunt. I've been there.
Don’t be sorry, I appreciate your response. Facing reality is a big part of it. When I posted this I gained weight at first, I was really defiant to change. There was a lot of great advice and support here and I used that to remind myself why I needed to change. Little by little I did, and it’s easier now. In my case, I needed to get my mental and emotional self on board, and allow mistakes, as long as I was consistent with logging food and weighing myself.
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