Courting at the gym

2

Replies

  • JennaM222
    JennaM222 Posts: 1,996 Member
    Comment that you've noticed her around a few times and that she getting more fit.

    Isnt that implying that you thought she was fat before? lol

    yes DO NOT say that! Just comment on her dedication to the gym or something! haha
  • beccyleigh
    beccyleigh Posts: 846 Member
    One day I arrived at the gym & was sorting out my music & this bloke asked me what I had playing. Was a good opening line & bless him he was quite nice looking but he noticed the wedding ring & rightly backed off. But if I were a man, that's how I would approach it. Just randomly going up to her & asking her out would be a bit too forward, getting an "in" without being pushy or creepy is the way to go.

    Good luck
  • taco_tap
    taco_tap Posts: 152 Member
    Go for it.. You will probably regret it if you don't. I think I would be flattered. You know the quote "If you cant handle me at my worst, you dont deserve me at my best"
  • Mallory0418
    Mallory0418 Posts: 723 Member
    This exact thing is happening at my gym. It's the cutest thing! This guy and girl go to gym around the same time I do so I've noticed they're talking to each other more everyday! Go for it! I would be very flattered to be hit on at the gym. :smile:
  • KatieJane83
    KatieJane83 Posts: 2,002 Member
    I definitely say go for it! Why not?

    I think I would be really flattered if someone approached me at the gym. And having become recently single, and hoping I'm going to have the nerve to get myself out there, I definitely appreciate a guy making the first move. Sometimes we're just shy! Just keep it a little more casual or informal, as others have said, rather than going for a number right away.
  • dieseljay74
    dieseljay74 Posts: 376
    Hold on a second, let me get my note pad....lol

    I've always heard women saying they hate that....well good to hear. I may have to proceed....
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,021 Member
    Even if it is socially acceptable to attempt this kind of approach in a gym, I am not even sure how to break the ice. In fact, at this present time in my life, I have nothing to offer a woman but my honest friendship. But then that would be another thread I suppose :ohwell:

    I am curious what you mean by this part. Is this a situation where you're married but in the process of getting a divorce and aren't sure you want to date until that's all out of the way? Or is this a situation where you're in a committed relationship, but you've got a crush on a woman at the gym?

    If it's the former, figure out how far you're willing to go. If you know you don't want to date yet, then don't approach her as a guy looking for a date. If you think you might be open to dating, then just be upfront about your marital status.

    If it's the latter, don't even go there. You cannot be friends with a woman you have a crush on. That is a can of worms.
  • HOSED49
    HOSED49 Posts: 642 Member
    how about the Chris Farley approach from Tommy Boy...
  • Being2befit
    Being2befit Posts: 127 Member
    I mean go for it..and worst she can do is look at your weird or think your weird

    but i mean i think alot of guys miss there opportunity just cause they didnt say hello..

    i mean does she talk or stare or look at you??
  • mommyami1
    mommyami1 Posts: 154 Member
    When I used to be a personal trainer some guy bought training from me just so he could talk to me. I ended up marrying him. I say go for it!
  • Scott613
    Scott613 Posts: 2,317 Member
    Ask her to spot you, Say you can't lift that much weight but you wanna look good working out so you need a pretty spotter.
  • livnlite
    livnlite Posts: 520
    1st thing I can advise is "Don't put the cart before the horse'. The term 'courting' insinuates that you have 2 willing participants.

    It's a logical maneuver ... Perhaps, it might be to your advantage to slow down just a tad .. and get to know her a little first before you start expecting ANYTHING in reciprocation. A smile, and a perhaps some friendly small talk can go a long way. Be tactful and polite, and you might just be able to feel how receptive she is. Once you get a feel for what she is all about, then you can decide whether or not you'd like to get to know her better...and visa versee. I think it's a great idea to offer her the opportunity to get to know you a little too. 1st impressions aren't carved in stone but they open doors.

    Ask her out for coffee, walk her to her car, ask for her number or however you want to handle it.
  • efokken
    efokken Posts: 138 Member
    Ask her how her sessions are going with a trainer..... I think guys think they have to start of talking to you by hitting on you first.
    Not so. Just start with general conversation, that way you will be able to feel her out, you can always tell if someone just wants to get back to their workout and will be a Hey type of friend there, or if they are willing to spend a few minutes chit chatting, that's cool too.

    I am always nice to anyone who talks to me or asks me a question at the gym, you never know what it might turn into... go for it!!
  • Krull_the_WarriorKing
    Krull_the_WarriorKing Posts: 650 Member
    Walk over to her with a towel, water bottle and your phone number. Give them to her turn and walk away.
  • Shanna_Inc86
    Shanna_Inc86 Posts: 781 Member
    I wouldn't mid at all either, I agree with beachgirl!

    If you happen to walk past her and you guys lock eyes, smile, say hello and keep walking.

    The next time you see her at the gym if she looks interested ( basically okaying an approach from you and NOT while she is running on the treadmill maybe while stretching or taking a water break ) and you happen to be close mention you see her there alot and ask her how she likes working with her trainer, or something like that. If she is interested, she will not try to make a quick break to get away from you.

    I'm with these ladies and efokken...general conversation...never know where it could lead:smile:
  • ASPhantom
    ASPhantom Posts: 637 Member
    I would say go really slow. Or, enjoy it for what it is. Sounds like a little flirting happening and you could just enjoy it for that.
    Don't rush or then everytime you see her, it will be really awkward.

    You don't want to have to change gym times. Keep smiling and be yourself. Nothing cheesy.
  • beccyleigh
    beccyleigh Posts: 846 Member
    Walk over to her with a towel, water bottle and your phone number. Give them to her turn and walk away.

    nooooooooooooooo:noway:
  • Navmachine
    Navmachine Posts: 63
    girls like flattery. tell her something along the lines of "hey, i dont want to sound weird, but i've seen you here before a few times. and i notice that you really give it your all when your working out, and i just wanted to tell you that it's really inspiring to me. that energy helps me with my own workout, so keep up the good work, your doing really well for youself." ask her something about her trainer, ask if she likes the trainer's style of teaching and that you have been interested in getting one yourself. keep it gym related, and quick. then when you see her again, give her a wave and a smile or a hello if she's within earshot. dont look like your staring at her often, or that you are interested beyond that conversation. women like guys that are comfortable with themselves enough to go either way.

    wait a couple of times to see if she reciprocates the friendly gestures or begins to talk to you. you can tell alot by someone's receptiveness based on the length of their responses and eye contact.

    also, as long as you have a car, a job, and dont live with your parents, i think you'll have plenty to offer a girl, especially if your intentions are good. if not...you might want to spare her the struggle of having to come pick you up, pay for dinner, and drop you off at home and never getting to be invited in. just keep it friendly.
  • Ocarina
    Ocarina Posts: 1,550 Member
    I think you should definitely attempt to start a conversation. While doing so you should check her ring finger. LOL.

    Nothing wrong with maybe meeting someone at the gym. It's no different from church, the park, the bar, or what have you. You just need to act polite, don't be pushy, and hope for the best.
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    I get werided out when I see people looking at me when I'm working out, except when I'm teaching my classes (so that would be in the weight room or cardio room). I have to be social and polite because I work there (part time, but hey), but I hate feeling oogled. That being said, say "hi" the worst thing that can happen is she rolls her eyes and you know. Just make sure that she's not in the middle of exercising when you do it, catch her on the way out of the gym.
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    by the way, I love that you're 25 and used an old fashioned word like "courting"
  • OranClover
    OranClover Posts: 4
    Just do me a favor and check to see if she has a ring first, I get annoyed when guys ask me out because I sport my wedding ring in plain sight for everyone to see. I am not mean about it or anything, and I do take it as a complement, but sometimes I wish folks were more observant. I even had a guy tell me after I told him I was married and held up my hand "Oh, well ware I am from women ware there ring on the other hand, I think you have it on the wrong hand" funny because he was Scottish and I know from a past relationship with a Scottish fella that he was totally full of Sh*# A simple "oh, well he's a lucky man, sorry to have bothered you" go's a LONG way
  • cnsmith2
    cnsmith2 Posts: 539 Member
    Did you go for it?!?!!?
  • deathstarclock
    deathstarclock Posts: 512 Member
    Oh man I forgot to update this!

    Yeah so the other day like always I notice her in the gym with her trainer and whatever I go about my routine. At the end of my routine I stretch out in this like common area that is next to the bathrooms. I notice her talking to her friends but I don't pay that much mind to it since I am actually focused on stretching. She walks by and goes into the bathroom and she's in the for a while. That's when the idea hits me. I decided I was going to wait until she got out and then leave the gym as she leaves to say something. So like I wait and end up doing extra stretches and I'm thinking this is so obvious but whatever. Finally she comes out and she's showered and changed so I immediately finish what I was doing and its sooo obvious but who cares. I end up holding the door for her and when she's outside I ask her if I can tell her something.

    So what did I say? Well I noticed that her deadlift form is like freaking perfect so I went with that. I told her I was somewhat jealous of her form and just kind of took it from there. So now I have a nickname for her when I see her and its "Deadlift."

    I still feel like a major dork though.
  • Spitfirex007
    Spitfirex007 Posts: 749 Member
    Just go say hello. If she is into you, then it won't really matter if you are at the gym or not.
  • DavyRockhit
    DavyRockhit Posts: 168
    A very interesting topic...we are all going to want to know updates
  • cnsmith2
    cnsmith2 Posts: 539 Member
    lol did she take it well? at least she knows you appreciate her form... ;)
  • jennajava
    jennajava Posts: 2,176 Member
    Hmm, I'm in workout clothes, my hair is in a ponytail, I'm sweating and a guy is still interested in getting my number? I wouldn't mind that at all!

    WORD. If I weren't married, I would consider that a huge compliment. I know I would LOVE it if my husband told me I was lookin' good when I was all gross and sweaty!
  • jennajava
    jennajava Posts: 2,176 Member
    Oh man I forgot to update this!

    Yeah so the other day like always I notice her in the gym with her trainer and whatever I go about my routine. At the end of my routine I stretch out in this like common area that is next to the bathrooms. I notice her talking to her friends but I don't pay that much mind to it since I am actually focused on stretching. She walks by and goes into the bathroom and she's in the for a while. That's when the idea hits me. I decided I was going to wait until she got out and then leave the gym as she leaves to say something. So like I wait and end up doing extra stretches and I'm thinking this is so obvious but whatever. Finally she comes out and she's showered and changed so I immediately finish what I was doing and its sooo obvious but who cares. I end up holding the door for her and when she's outside I ask her if I can tell her something.

    So what did I say? Well I noticed that her deadlift form is like freaking perfect so I went with that. I told her I was somewhat jealous of her form and just kind of took it from there. So now I have a nickname for her when I see her and its "Deadlift."

    I still feel like a major dork though.

    You've broken the ice, now ask her out!
  • jenny95662
    jenny95662 Posts: 997 Member
    Hmm, I'm in workout clothes, my hair is in a ponytail, I'm sweating and a guy is still interested in getting my number? I wouldn't mind that at all!

    yeah i am married but if i wasnt def this lol
This discussion has been closed.

Categories