What nobody tells you about losing weight
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@matthalloxford Thank you for the info! Every time I lost weight in the past, I regained it all because the idea of "maintenance" never even crossed my mind... I was done losing weight so I could go back to normal, right? lol... anyway, I've learned about the concept of maintenance from others here on MFP and I know I will not regain this time around. I appreciate the specifics you shared, hadn't come across those numbers yet. Congrats on losing those 70 lbs, and keep up the good work!matthalloxford wrote: »At the end of your dieting phase (your cut), you will need to go back to maintenance for a while to let your metabolism reset. This involves carefully tracking your calories as you increase how much you're eating.
During this, you're expected to gain about 2% in water weight (1.5%-2.5% variance day to day). I didn't know this number, so I was sort of fishing in the dark and never quite hit my maintenance in the last phase. I worried that any regain was bad, but a bit of regain is expected and good as long as you don't go beyond it!6 -
Colderinminnesota wrote: »It seems like only women are commenting here, and that's okay, but I'm going to make a comment from a man's perspective. It is truly delightful to look down in the shower and see more than your gut, if you know what I mean. And that profile you see when you're standing sideways in front of the full-length mirror. Wow! It's true what the urologists say. You will look like you have more when it's not surrounded by fat. It's not my intent here to offend anyone, but if you're a guy, you'll know what I mean.
A related observation is that my libido seems to be noticeably higher as a skinny person than as a larger person. (It's still nowhere near my teenage levels, which is probably good as I got very little done back then.)
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That it is possible to walk up multiple flights of stairs without getting winded!6
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They did tell me the last 10 pounds is the hardest, but oh my goodness! I never dreamed it would be this hard!7
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You will notice strangers will look at you differently and say good morning .
Toned people in well fitted clothes get more attention from everyone.5 -
I'm 85 pounds down and 115 to go. Roughly. The biggest thing that I have learned is that your weight loss journey is uniquely yours. Don't compare yourself to others because everyone loses at a different rate and don't let others compare you to themselves. Just because they couldn't do it doesn't mean you can't.13
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That it is easier to get up from the floor
It is easier to play with grandchildren
It is easier to cross my legs
That my food tastes have changed for the better
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I don't remember if I've said this before, but
When I first lost quite a bit, the outside of my thighs hurt, like bruises, but I never saw any bruises. I finally realized that I had lost fat in my upper arms and side chest. My arms now lay flat by my side instead of sticking out. When I walk, they brush my legs. Lol. A good problem!9 -
That over five years in to weight loss, consistent exercise, and careful maintenance, I still have enough extra belly skin to honestly strap on an extra pair of D-cup bras and handily fill the suckers out.
Does it never go away? 🥹
Seriously, I’m grateful to still be in maintenance, should really ought to have bought stock in Lycra by now.
But, just, damn……. so frustrating.12 -
lemonsurprise wrote: »Wanted to make this thread for motivationial purposes more than anything but they don't all have to be super positive! More of what came as a surprise. I'll start..
- how much confidence it will actually bring, especially when strangers start treating you like royalty all of a sudden!
- Sitting (particularly in baths) and laying (particularly in beds) will become ever increasingly uncomfortable.
- how vain you will become! I can't walk past a mirror without checking how I look nowadays!
Your turn!
How scary it is when you FINALLY reach your goal. Im 1 pound away and it scares me. You work so hard to reach it, its consuming, then its like, well.. I did it.. so now what.8 -
christina_thompson2 wrote: »lemonsurprise wrote: »Wanted to make this thread for motivationial purposes more than anything but they don't all have to be super positive! More of what came as a surprise. I'll start..
- how much confidence it will actually bring, especially when strangers start treating you like royalty all of a sudden!
- Sitting (particularly in baths) and laying (particularly in beds) will become ever increasingly uncomfortable.
- how vain you will become! I can't walk past a mirror without checking how I look nowadays!
Your turn!
How scary it is when you FINALLY reach your goal. Im 1 pound away and it scares me. You work so hard to reach it, its consuming, then its like, well.. I did it.. so now what.
Now what? Honey, you increase to maintenance but continue on like you still have five pounds to lose. Logging, weighing, recording, watching.
It’s when you slack off and relax that it comes back on.13 -
@springlering62 speaks truth. Maintenance is exactly the same plan as weight loss with the only exception that your calorie goal goes up by just a bit.
Scary? Perhaps. Maybe at first. Maybe the first time you see the scale tick up, because it will. Just like during weight loss, there will be up days and down days. You will be more in touch with those little fluctuations because they aren't masked by an overall decreasing weight trend. Scary perhaps also if you watch the scale continue to go down for a while. Don't stress too much, just pay attention.
Figure out a good calorie goal, then stick to it and OBSERVE the results. Keep tracking. Keep recording exercise. In a few weeks, see if you need to make any changes. You will get it dialed in. The bonus is if you fall off the wagon so to speak, your maintenance goal will get you back to maintenance at any time. It will of course be slower than going back to loss mode. You will have a good idea of what the goal should be.
It also might make sense to develop a goal weight RANGE. I have two; an absolute range and an ideal range. When I am outside of the ideal range, I know I need to make small changes. Like now. When I bump up outside of the absolute range, I have to remind myself to be a bit more aggressive to make sure that it doesn't keep going the wrong way. Vigilance! That's the trick. And - STICK TO IT.9 -
I understand what the original poster means. Dieting is a positive all-consuming activity .. and when one makes goal. Yeah.. there's a feeling of "now what?" Also .. there's an adjustment; finding clothes that look good.. body dysmorphia ... friends and family saying you look sick... the list goes on and on. Being consumed by food and your body seems endless...and a bad idea. But that's about what you have to do.4
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The pressure to always be "on": People start expecting you to be the best version of yourself 24/7, which can be exhausting. You feel like you need to keep up appearances all the time.
The loneliness: As your status or success grows, you may find yourself more isolated, because people treat you differently, or you become wary of who has genuine intentions.5 -
elisa123gal wrote: »… Being consumed by food….
Being consumed by food, instead of the proper way round.
Deep, that.
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@timdavid010 Food for thought: being the best version of yourself is not the same as living up to other people's standards. Nobody is perfect all the time. You being you is enough; and being your authentic self actually means not having to keep up appearances. It's ok to not be who other people expect you to be. When we try to be everything to everyone, we end up not being right for anyone (including ourselves, which is the worst part). You do you!timdavid010 wrote: »The pressure to always be "on": People start expecting you to be the best version of yourself 24/7, which can be exhausting. You feel like you need to keep up appearances all the time.8 -
That a diet that works for one person may not be right for another person - we all belong to subsets of the overweight with different metabolisms and different dietary needs - I’ve wasted too many years trying to lose weight by cutting calories or fat - turns out I need only 60 grams of carbs per day and I can lose weight on 1600 calories a day. Might not work for somebody with a different genetic make-up, but them’s the breaks…5
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@opusfra
I'm glad you found a way of eating that is working for you. It's true that we do indeed have plenty of individual differences in how we process the foods we eat and how our bodies turn fuel into movement. I'm not sure about the rest of your discovery.
A calorie is a measure of energy. If you eat more calories than you burn, you gain weight. If you eat the same amount of energy that you expend, you neither gain or lose. If you eat fewer calories than you burn, you lose weight. If you can lose weight at 1600 calories per day, it shouldn't matter what macronutrients make up those calories. It is important to get enough protein and fat. Carbohydrate is fuel for your brain among other things.5 -
Some negative things too, just so you know what to expect:
- Some things on your body are really saggy and it WILL make you sad at some point. (who cares, it doesn't affect your health)
- The opposite sex will treat you differently, which makes you feel like before you really weren't attractive and worth less (it's not true at all, people will naturally be drawn to thinner healthy people)
- People will start telling you "You look sick" or "you look too skinny" Just because they're used to you looking chubby. My work friend told me I look like a "crackhead" even though I was at a very healthy weight, if not slightly chubby. (Ignore them and laugh)
- You will be criticized by other's for eating healthier food "rabbit food". (Sitting in a lunch room at work, and out with friends this happened multiple times. I told them that that fatty pie and chips was bad for their heart)
- You will be asked if you got sick, or what your secret was. (healthy eating and exercise answer annoys people)
- Getting a little obsessed will happen. Keep an eye on yourself, be healthy and don't step into the ED realm.
Don't let the negatives put you off either. There are so many good things, and it makes you learn about other people.8 -
@opusfra Eating low(er)-carb and high(er)-fat seems to be key for me, as well. Eating this way has me feeling energetic and alert in a way a high carb diet doesn't (even while eating only "healthy" fruit/veggie carbs).That a diet that works for one person may not be right for another person - we all belong to subsets of the overweight with different metabolisms and different dietary needs - I’ve wasted too many years trying to lose weight by cutting calories or fat - turns out I need only 60 grams of carbs per day and I can lose weight on 1600 calories a day. Might not work for somebody with a different genetic make-up, but them’s the breaks…
And cutting calories too much will always backfire for me: better to eat a bit more and have more energy to be active, than to restrict calories too much, run out of fuel, and then start in on the cravings & binge eating.
Isn't it fun figuring out what works and what doesn't
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Yup. Urologist told me the same exact thing! It's good to know that one is normal, and not "under-sized"!! 😅
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Food Police are so annoying. And they come from both ends, meaning most will stop you if they think you are eating too much or the "wrong" foods, but also when I was doing intermittent fasting, everyone and their grandma lectured me how I must not skip breakfast and blah blah blah, it was sooo annoying. Especially since 95% of those very same people are seriously overweight! 🤔
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Yes, very true!
But on occasion I will still enjoy my favorite unhealthful foods!
Yesterday I celebrated losing another 10 kg by having a huge 400g hamburger! 🍔
First one I had in about a year I think.
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Yes I hear…yesterday I finally bought new suits to celebrate reaching a goal of losing 30 kg (10-13 more to go, depending on who you ask), and moving from suit jacket size 62 to 50! One suit is even"slim fit" which I never thought I'd wear in this lifetime!! 😀
Now under some pressure to throw my big clothing in the garbage during spring cleaning…but it's hard to throw stuff out. Maybe will try to donate…but in back of my mind still fearful I'll gain the wt back and need the clothing…
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Just my own personal take here, but I got rid of the bigger clothes every time I went down a few sizes.
I’m kinda cheap and my mentality is that I’m much more likely to stay on track if there’s no larger sizes living in the closet. I don’t want to have to jettison my nice small clothes (I’ve seriously upped my fashion game) and spend money to replace with bigger ones.
Man, I remember the days I’d go into Eddie Bauer and just buy one of every XXL color and leave without trying them on. It was all tshirts tunics and leggings, because I mistakenly thought I was hiding the fat gal I was in the lazy style of leggings (Urgh!!) and tunics.
Then there was the day I discovered the XXLs wouldn’t cover my belly any more. 🥺
Get rid of the old big clothes- if you have a plan and think you can handle maintenance responsibly. Otherwise they’re a crutch and implicit permission to fail.7 -
I have gone through my wardrobe and thrown or donated anything that was too big, or even asything I could still get away with but was that frumpy, hide-the-fat-gal style. It's been so empowering! I've also been "shopping in my closet" and celebrating fitting back into some beloved clothes I hung on to in hopes I could wear them again!
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Very good list here. I've always eaten pretty healthy (at least when I make my food) and got comments on it. So, no change for me.
I've lost 50 lbs so far, and everyone is amazed when I say I did it with diet and exercise (for me, especially exercise). These days people don't believe this can be done, with all the push for meds and surgery.
One other thing to consider - I've lost the equivalent of a child so far, but am still 70 lbs away from my goal (which BTW will put me at a BMI of 26, still considered 'overweight.') Even though I've done well, the general public still would see me as 'fat.' It can be frustrating at times to see what you have accomplished and know most people don't see it. But, I just keep looking at the gains in strength, endurance, and physicla abilities over this time last year - THAT is the real success!
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