Watch out for predators

124»

Replies

  • Heidijjo
    Heidijjo Posts: 42 Member
    I’m considering starting a running post on my profile with scammers profile names and screenshots of their chats. Anyone feel like contributing?

    It’s getting really old.
  • Retroguy2000
    Retroguy2000 Posts: 1,891 Member
    @Heidijjo You sent me a friend req this week. Since I don't do the friends thing here with anyone, I sent a PM politely declining, as I typically do. I'm just checking that you actually received that? I recall some talk earlier here that messages don't get received except by friends, something like that.
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,768 Member
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    I don't want to be constantly pursued here by a user who comments on nearly everything I write.

    You can Block them in the DM function, unfriend them after blocking them, set them to "Ignore" in the Community. That may not be all of the effects you might hope for, but it seems like it's some of them.

    Doing that stuff without reporting their bad behavior to MFP just leaves them free to bother other users.
    Like clockwork.

    LOL.
    For instance if some MFP user constantly is a 'reply guy' to nearly every post, a good social media platform would allow me to simply block them, and mute any replies.

    . . . even better and making all of us more safe would just be a simple button that allowed me to mute another account.

    Nothing more onerous than just clicking a button.
    AnnPT77 wrote: »

    You can . . . set them to "Ignore" in the Community.

    That's your "Mute" button for replies. Use it.
    Heidijjo wrote: »
    I’m considering starting a running post on my profile with scammers profile names and screenshots of their chats. Anyone feel like contributing?

    It’s getting really old.

    I hear what you're saying, and understand why you might want to do that.

    If you do, make sure nothing visible to others on MFP, or anything you post, will let people find and harass you in the rest of your life: No real name, no location, no IG or FB references, etc., etc. See if your profile photo brings up anything personal if someone does an image search on the web. These aren't necessarily only solo skeezy guys who'll drop their bad habit here if outed. Most? Sure. But I wouldn't count on all of them being that.

    In addition, I'd suggest taking a look at the MFP Community Guidelines. Doing something like what you suggest is at least skating on the edge of some of the rules, and violating those rules can get your ID restricted from the Community or deleted from MFP, just as is done to the creeps who get reported. I wouldn't want that to happen to you.

    Please be careful. This is a noble impulse, but there are risks.

  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 18,429 Member
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    I don't want to be constantly pursued here by a user who comments on nearly everything I write.

    You can Block them in the DM function, unfriend them after blocking them, set them to "Ignore" in the Community. That may not be all of the effects you might hope for, but it seems like it's some of them.

    Doing that stuff without reporting their bad behavior to MFP just leaves them free to bother other users.
    Like clockwork.

    LOL.
    For instance if some MFP user constantly is a 'reply guy' to nearly every post, a good social media platform would allow me to simply block them, and mute any replies.

    . . . even better and making all of us more safe would just be a simple button that allowed me to mute another account.

    Nothing more onerous than just clicking a button.
    AnnPT77 wrote: »

    You can . . . set them to "Ignore" in the Community.

    That's your "Mute" button for replies. Use it.
    Heidijjo wrote: »
    I’m considering starting a running post on my profile with scammers profile names and screenshots of their chats. Anyone feel like contributing?

    It’s getting really old.

    I hear what you're saying, and understand why you might want to do that.

    If you do, make sure nothing visible to others on MFP, or anything you post, will let people find and harass you in the rest of your life: No real name, no location, no IG or FB references, etc., etc. See if your profile photo brings up anything personal if someone does an image search on the web. These aren't necessarily only solo skeezy guys who'll drop their bad habit here if outed. Most? Sure. But I wouldn't count on all of them being that.

    In addition, I'd suggest taking a look at the MFP Community Guidelines. Doing something like what you suggest is at least skating on the edge of some of the rules, and violating those rules can get your ID restricted from the Community or deleted from MFP, just as is done to the creeps who get reported. I wouldn't want that to happen to you.

    Please be careful. This is a noble impulse, but there are risks.

    All of this, and honestly, it seems like a waste of energy. The scammers won't care, they're not here on the forums, they're just flicking out invites and hoping something sticks. Personally I'm just going to stick with not accepting any requests unless I know whop its coming from (and even then, I'm probably going to accept, but then not interact outside the forums for the reasons previously mentioned).
  • SurferGirl1982
    SurferGirl1982 Posts: 568 Member
    @AnnPT77 I was just looking at the MFP Community Guidelines. I haven't finished reading it all, so I may have more questions.

    I'm fairly new to social media and I don't want to seem ignorant. But, what is trolling? One of the rules says, "I will report trolls instead of engaging them." Since I don't know what a troll is, how would I know that they are a troll to be able to report them?

    Thanks for your help!
  • Heidijjo
    Heidijjo Posts: 42 Member
    @Heidijjo You sent me a friend req this week. Since I don't do the friends thing here with anyone, I sent a PM politely declining, as I typically do. I'm just checking that you actually received that? I recall some talk earlier here that messages don't get received except by friends, something like that.

    No. I’m sorry. I didn’t get a message. But it’s not an issue. I added several people who wanted accountability buddies. I think you may have been in that thread.
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,768 Member
    edited January 9
    @AnnPT77 I was just looking at the MFP Community Guidelines. I haven't finished reading it all, so I may have more questions.

    I'm fairly new to social media and I don't want to seem ignorant. But, what is trolling? One of the rules says, "I will report trolls instead of engaging them." Since I don't know what a troll is, how would I know that they are a troll to be able to report them?

    Thanks for your help!

    The definition is a little squishy, as with so many terms, but basically it's intentionally posting controversial or stupid-seeming or mean things to bait other people into replying. Insincere posts intentionally baiting others into making an emotional or argumentative response, pretty much.

    E.T.A. If someone's being creepy right out here in public on a Community forum post, trolling or not, it's always fine to use "Flag/report" and say why you think the post is inappropriate. The moderators will take a look at the post (after a bit of a delay, but usually within few hours to a day IME), and delete the post if they feel it goes against the Community guideliness.

    That's different from the creepy DMs, which would need to be reported through the Help function or to an MFP staff person or something like that, IMU.
  • SurferGirl1982
    SurferGirl1982 Posts: 568 Member
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    @AnnPT77 I was just looking at the MFP Community Guidelines. I haven't finished reading it all, so I may have more questions.

    I'm fairly new to social media and I don't want to seem ignorant. But, what is trolling? One of the rules says, "I will report trolls instead of engaging them." Since I don't know what a troll is, how would I know that they are a troll to be able to report them?

    Thanks for your help!

    The definition is a little squishy, as with so many terms, but basically it's intentionally posting controversial or stupid-seeming or mean things to bait other people into replying. Insincere posts intentionally baiting others into making an emotional or argumentative response, pretty much.

    OK..I think I understand. Thank you!

  • Heidijjo
    Heidijjo Posts: 42 Member
    edited January 9
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    I don't want to be constantly pursued here by a user who comments on nearly everything I write.

    You can Block them in the DM function, unfriend them after blocking them, set them to "Ignore" in the Community. That may not be all of the effects you might hope for, but it seems like it's some of them.

    Doing that stuff without reporting their bad behavior to MFP just leaves them free to bother other users.
    Like clockwork.

    LOL.
    For instance if some MFP user constantly is a 'reply guy' to nearly every post, a good social media platform would allow me to simply block them, and mute any replies.

    . . . even better and making all of us more safe would just be a simple button that allowed me to mute another account.

    Nothing more onerous than just clicking a button.
    AnnPT77 wrote: »

    You can . . . set them to "Ignore" in the Community.

    That's your "Mute" button for replies. Use it.
    Heidijjo wrote: »
    I’m considering starting a running post on my profile with scammers profile names and screenshots of their chats. Anyone feel like contributing?

    It’s getting really old.

    I hear what you're saying, and understand why you might want to do that.

    If you do, make sure nothing visible to others on MFP, or anything you post, will let people find and harass you in the rest of your life: No real name, no location, no IG or FB references, etc., etc. See if your profile photo brings up anything personal if someone does an image search on the web. These aren't necessarily only solo skeezy guys who'll drop their bad habit here if outed. Most? Sure. But I wouldn't count on all of them being that.

    In addition, I'd suggest taking a look at the MFP Community Guidelines. Doing something like what you suggest is at least skating on the edge of some of the rules, and violating those rules can get your ID restricted from the Community or deleted from MFP, just as is done to the creeps who get reported. I wouldn't want that to happen to you.

    Please be careful. This is a noble impulse, but there are risks.

    Thank you for your sound advice.

    It’s always the same thing. They friend request me, ask what devices I’m using and share a sob story about theirs. Am I married or single? Do I have kids? Where exactly am I from, specifically what city. Almost always in the military away from home.

    When I start firing questions back, they unfriend. 🤣 They get defensive when you question them. I had one guy say, “But that’s not what I asked you.” 😆😂 Poor thing.

    If I just quit responding at first flag, they just sit there quietly. Watching…………

    🥸🤡🥸

    That being said, I’ve run into some great accountability buddies and some new peloton riders. So all is not negative.

    Not sure where to report their usernames to, but I have a list. I’ll figure it out. 🫶🏻
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 18,429 Member
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    @AnnPT77 I was just looking at the MFP Community Guidelines. I haven't finished reading it all, so I may have more questions.

    I'm fairly new to social media and I don't want to seem ignorant. But, what is trolling? One of the rules says, "I will report trolls instead of engaging them." Since I don't know what a troll is, how would I know that they are a troll to be able to report them?

    Thanks for your help!

    The definition is a little squishy, as with so many terms, but basically it's intentionally posting controversial or stupid-seeming or mean things to bait other people into replying. Insincere posts intentionally baiting others into making an emotional or argumentative response, pretty much.

    OK..I think I understand. Thank you!

    It doesn't happen as often anymore but years ago, it wouldn't be uncommon for some jerk, probably a kid, to join the forum and to go around the threads insulting people and throwing out fat jokes etc. That kind of behaviour was the original 'trolling', it's basically posting with the intention to get a rise out of people.
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,768 Member
    Heidijjo wrote: »
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    I don't want to be constantly pursued here by a user who comments on nearly everything I write.

    You can Block them in the DM function, unfriend them after blocking them, set them to "Ignore" in the Community. That may not be all of the effects you might hope for, but it seems like it's some of them.

    Doing that stuff without reporting their bad behavior to MFP just leaves them free to bother other users.
    Like clockwork.

    LOL.
    For instance if some MFP user constantly is a 'reply guy' to nearly every post, a good social media platform would allow me to simply block them, and mute any replies.

    . . . even better and making all of us more safe would just be a simple button that allowed me to mute another account.

    Nothing more onerous than just clicking a button.
    AnnPT77 wrote: »

    You can . . . set them to "Ignore" in the Community.

    That's your "Mute" button for replies. Use it.
    Heidijjo wrote: »
    I’m considering starting a running post on my profile with scammers profile names and screenshots of their chats. Anyone feel like contributing?

    It’s getting really old.

    I hear what you're saying, and understand why you might want to do that.

    If you do, make sure nothing visible to others on MFP, or anything you post, will let people find and harass you in the rest of your life: No real name, no location, no IG or FB references, etc., etc. See if your profile photo brings up anything personal if someone does an image search on the web. These aren't necessarily only solo skeezy guys who'll drop their bad habit here if outed. Most? Sure. But I wouldn't count on all of them being that.

    In addition, I'd suggest taking a look at the MFP Community Guidelines. Doing something like what you suggest is at least skating on the edge of some of the rules, and violating those rules can get your ID restricted from the Community or deleted from MFP, just as is done to the creeps who get reported. I wouldn't want that to happen to you.

    Please be careful. This is a noble impulse, but there are risks.

    Thank you for your sound advice.

    It’s always the same thing. They friend request me, ask what devices I’m using and share a sob story about theirs. Am I married or single? Do I have kids? Where exactly am I from, specifically what city. Almost always in the military away from home.

    When I start firing questions back, they unfriend. 🤣 They get defensive when you question them. I had one guy say, “But that’s not what I asked you.” 😆😂 Poor thing.

    If I just quit responding at first flag, they just sit there quietly. Watching…………

    🥸🤡🥸

    That being said, I’ve run into some great accountability buddies and some new peloton riders. So all is not negative.

    Not sure where to report their usernames to, but I have a list. I’ll figure it out. 🫶🏻

    Some ways to report would be to email the support address (support@myfitnesspal.com), use the "Submit A Request" thing under "Help", or DM the MFP staff. (You can DM MFP staff without being MFP friends with them.)

    There's a form that used to work for this sort of thing, https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSeMXsYdgi8RHydw1Qn-yJCgbygOCL7LUPWbeS6iynnax1I3YA/viewform , but I'm not sure whether that's actively being monitored at this point.

    Any of those routes, it would be helpful to explain what's inappropriate, kind of like you did in your post above, rather than just listing the IDs.
  • robertw486
    robertw486 Posts: 2,406 Member
    Just use common sense people. If the initial interactions are sketchy, chances are future interactions will be as well. Nobody needs to use a covert app to communicate when they can do so here, or via a "gasp" actual phone conversation if someone was comfortable enough.

    Scammers are nothing new, and it's not just men. And we can't stereotype that all military men, men with cats, etc, etc are scammers.

    As a former military man with a dog that would put cats to shame, I now feel like I'm less trusted. :'(



    For those that do want more open communication than MFP has without using other communication means, consider starting a group of friends where you can all check in with each other, motivate, etc... but without someone wanting a third party app ID or something of that nature.
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,768 Member
    robertw486 wrote: »
    Just use common sense people. If the initial interactions are sketchy, chances are future interactions will be as well. Nobody needs to use a covert app to communicate when they can do so here, or via a "gasp" actual phone conversation if someone was comfortable enough.

    Scammers are nothing new, and it's not just men. And we can't stereotype that all military men, men with cats, etc, etc are scammers.

    As a former military man with a dog that would put cats to shame, I now feel like I'm less trusted. :'(


    For those that do want more open communication than MFP has without using other communication means, consider starting a group of friends where you can all check in with each other, motivate, etc... but without someone wanting a third party app ID or something of that nature.

    @robertw486, to be clear, and I hope all are clear: To say that many romance scammers who target women are pretending to be military men or doctors with photos of dogs/cats is NOT the same thing as saying all military men who have dogs/cats (most of them real and decent humans) are scammers.

    I wish I could show you the profiles of the obvious romance-scam FRs I've gotten on Facebook, literally dozens in total. It's simply a fact that there's a very high proportion of "military men" (yeah, right) and "doctors" (equally implausible) and sometimes even "military doctors", often with photos that include adorable dogs/cats. High incidence that they "live abroad", too.

    A bunch of the repeat FR scammers here have had the pattern of supposedly-handsome men with either young children or cute pets, claiming to be (oh-so-sad) widowers just looking for companionship. In some cases, image search has turned up whose photo it really is, and it's not someone with the claimed name.

    If there's a stereotype here, it's the scammers who are doing the stereotyping, not the people who observe the scammers' repetitive patterns.

    Here on MFP, you have a long track record as a good guy. You're far from the only one. Most guys here IME are good guys. I won't speak for others, but back when there was a point to FRs here, I accepted many from men, after checking out various aspects of the ID. I still accept some, even though I don't see the point. (I'm sure I made some mistakes in both directions, BTW.)

    I understand why you might feel stereotyped, truly. I'd encourage you to be outraged at the scammers about that, because they exploit things that in real and decent guys like you are signals of empathy and integrity, such as military service, affection for animals, love of their children. They're unconscionable. Their exploitation of your integrity is what has made some women fearful.
  • claireychn074
    claireychn074 Posts: 1,688 Member
    robertw486 wrote: »
    Just use common sense people. If the initial interactions are sketchy, chances are future interactions will be as well. Nobody needs to use a covert app to communicate when they can do so here, or via a "gasp" actual phone conversation if someone was comfortable enough.

    Scammers are nothing new, and it's not just men. And we can't stereotype that all military men, men with cats, etc, etc are scammers.

    As a former military man with a dog that would put cats to shame, I now feel like I'm less trusted. :'(



    For those that do want more open communication than MFP has without using other communication means, consider starting a group of friends where you can all check in with each other, motivate, etc... but without someone wanting a third party app ID or something of that nature.

    There’s a reason why men pushed back against the Me Too movement with the hashtag “not all men”. And then women pushed back with “but always men”.

    I am going to second @AnnPT77 above; a lot of the fake requests we (as women - can’t speak for men) receive, pretend to be forces, doctors or dentists. I’ve also had some “engineers”. The scammers choose them because society celebrates the men who give themselves to service, in protection roles or in saving roles, or in roles which are financially well rewarded. They hope this gets over the first hurdle of suspicion so that they can start to gather information.

    I’m sorry, as Ann said, if you feel stereotyped, but absolutely get angry at the people who have the nerve to take your credentials and use them to scam others.