Asians trying to lose weight

245678

Replies

  • tallp
    tallp Posts: 9
    Hi Kany,

    I feel your pain. why is it the Asian folks, elders etc, feel its ok to comment on your weight!

    and then on the other hand offer you all kinds of nice things to eat and get offended if you dont!!!!

    argh.

    Don't stop going out though, just because some person decides that they can comment on your weight.

    Hang in there

    cheers

    P
  • CaliSweden
    CaliSweden Posts: 62
    Yeah I don't get that one either. They love to feed you like they're feeding an army. But just before they did that they are like "omg you're big!" Sometimes I wonder if it's like a test or something :p Hahaha.
  • Luckydrd
    Luckydrd Posts: 56 Member
    My nickname in Korea was Buddha. Www.flickr.com/photos/madriver
  • Logansmom2011
    Logansmom2011 Posts: 81 Member
    I'm half korean,does that count?Growing up with a korean mom,my weight was always an issue to her.People tried to always tell me its due to her culture and their idea of perfect and being skinny and blah blah blah.I'm never going to be tiny,I got my body from my dads side of the family who is black and native american,so I have the hips,big thighs,boobs and butt.I think even if I do get down to the weight for someone my height which I think I'm between 5'4 and 5'6 not really sure my exact height,that she will still not think I'm small enough because I'm shaped different.
  • mnishi
    mnishi Posts: 419 Member
    .
  • mnishi
    mnishi Posts: 419 Member
    I think my ultimate goal weight is 115 but I'd be happy between 115-120 at 5'2 1/2 :)
    at 125 lbs, I can STILL only fit into size XXXL when I go back to China. "Miss, I'm not sure we carry your size..."




    OMG!!! I'm half Japanese and have always been the fat asian. I went to China about six years ago when I was about 30lbs lighter (130) and shopping around for clothes really depressed me. My size 8 in America is a XXXL in China, Now I understand that us American's are generally fat, but come on 130lbs makes me an XXXL? I can't even imagine who would even fit into a small.

    NOTE: majority of you "fat" asians are not fat by any means. Celebrate your beauty and don't worry about what other people think of you.
  • hello77kitty
    hello77kitty Posts: 260 Member
    I'm an Asian. I grew up in Korea, the land of plastic surgeries and starvation diet camps. We're not talking about "below 1200 net" starvation... we're talking zero calorie starvation.

    So that's why Koreans are so thin! I live in a highly korean populated city and they are the skinniest of all the asians from what I've notiiced. Even the older ladies!
  • queenpushycat
    queenpushycat Posts: 762 Member
    Hi All,

    Are there any other Asians out there trying to lose weight? What are your goals for weight and sizes?
    Doesn't it SUCK being the chubby Asian in the group? Growing up, all my friends were consistently 105lbs!! I was at least 30 lbs heavier than that in high school!! I've also got a larger frame that most Asians...I wear 27" waist jeans and will probably never fit into anything smaller thanks to my wide hips...but I suppose curves come with their benefits too :)

    I think my ultimate goal weight is 115 but I'd be happy between 115-120 at 5'2 1/2 :)
    at 125 lbs, I can STILL only fit into size XXXL when I go back to China. "Miss, I'm not sure we carry your size..."

    Mom was constantly on me to lose weight and catch a man...haha !

    Now that I've got one she doesn't want me to get too skinny because it's not good for bearing male grandchildren...

    LMAO, "Larger frame"? "27" jeans"? Your mom constantly trying to ask you to lose weight. Um, basically you haven't met me yet.

    Yes to your first question, I'm the Asian that REALLY NEED to lose weight, because I'm consider Obese, my BMI is way too high.

    Height is 5ft3. Current Weight is 180lbs.

    And does it SUCKS to be Chubby Asian in the ethnic group? How about it SUCKS TO THE CORE being the fattest in the "Asians-who-are-thin-but-still-thinks-they-are-fat" group. I'm not trying to be insulting or attacking you or anything. But you have no idea how I feel. My friends have been always the lighter, maybe to them, they are fat. But what about me? That's the reason losing weight in Asian countries, doesn't help. Because they are like "hey! I'm size number 2, I'm fat. I wanna go to size number -13, then I'll be satisfied" Try being size 18 all your life, then yeah, size 2 is like.... tiny weeny.

    Every time I'm at the bus stop or the train station or even just walking around outside, skinny Asian EVERYWHERE. Women are never satisfied their own body, I know that, but it's so exaggerating that they are so damn small, and yet they still complains that they are fat and ugly. (=_=) And I'm like, "okay... so if you're thin and still call yourself fat and ugly, so I'll be the big giant ogre then?"

    Sorry to just burst out like that, but I just can't help it. Asian girls who are size that small and yet they think they are fat will never understand what I am going through right now. So... yeah.

    But still, I will never give up in losing weight. It's just it's harder than everybody expected. If you're size 2, I'm size 18, I have to SUPER EXTRA harder than you. so.... be easy on yourself.
  • CaliSweden
    CaliSweden Posts: 62
    I have plenty of Asian friends like that, who are rail thin, and are like "omg I'm so fat I need to lose weight!" I say omg anymore weight and you'll fall through the cracks in the ground. I'm like geez if they're fat I must make a Sumo wrestler look skinny. But then again they're the same girls that do complain that they don't have enough lady lumps.
  • Kany
    Kany Posts: 336
    Hi Kany,

    I feel your pain. why is it the Asian folks, elders etc, feel its ok to comment on your weight!

    and then on the other hand offer you all kinds of nice things to eat and get offended if you dont!!!!

    argh.

    Don't stop going out though, just because some person decides that they can comment on your weight.

    Hang in there

    cheers

    P

    Thank you. I have started going out again. I told myself that nothing is going to change if I just go to work and stay home. I started having girls night out so the dancing helps burn off the calories. It motivated me enough to lose weight so I can look as good as my friends. I stopped making excuses about exercising. As a matter of fact, I'm looking forward to it now. My husband and I go to the gym almost everyday and I got back into mountain biking with him. It's gotten me back down about 14lbs this year.

    I just don't understand why asian families feel the need to remind you that you gained weight. I know I gained weight, I only look at myself everyday in the mirror. Uh, yeah, I do own a mirror. My husband doesn't seem to mind that I gained so much weight or doesn't even mentions it but others are willingly to give their opinions without being asked.
    SMH...

    Well to all the Asian ladies out there, I know it's tough when people mention your weight. Just know that we are all flawed being and only those who feel the need to remind others of their flaws or "deemed" flaws are the ones who are insecure about themselves the most.
  • eudemonia
    eudemonia Posts: 149 Member
    i'm 5'4", 168lb. my highest weight was a couple of years ago at 210. it always felt a bit awkward to be around my friends when they complain that they need to lose weight, and they seemed to be at a very healthy, acceptable stage. lol i think i've always been the fat one in the group, it didn't matter who i was with. i don't think it will ever be possible for me to look small and delicate like other asians, because my frame seems pretty big. unfortunately, i can't understand the pressure of people who are at a healthy weight to lose a bit more, because i'm someone who is striving to get to that healthy place. i totally dig you on the harshness of the comments, though. my relatives are so blunt when it comes to my appearance, lol.
  • Jeff92se
    Jeff92se Posts: 3,369 Member
    Male. 5ft7" currently 178lbs. While in Japan, people thought of me as heavy or fat. But those dudes are so skinny, it's funny. No muscle. I lift so my weight appears to be higher than it should be BMI - wise. Which I've learned to ignore.

    My bodyfat is approx 19%. Which is right there. Although I'd prefer t be in the mid-teens to maintain. But getting down to the 11% range just to see what that looked like would be nice.
  • queenpushycat
    queenpushycat Posts: 762 Member
    i'm 5'4", 168lb. my highest weight was a couple of years ago at 210. it always felt a bit awkward to be around my friends when they complain that they need to lose weight, and they seemed to be at a very healthy, acceptable stage. lol i think i've always been the fat one in the group, it didn't matter who i was with. i don't think it will ever be possible for me to look small and delicate like other asians, because my frame seems pretty big. unfortunately, i can't understand the pressure of people who are at a healthy weight to lose a bit more, because i'm someone who is striving to get to that healthy place. i totally dig you on the harshness of the comments, though. my relatives are so blunt when it comes to my appearance, lol.

    Lol, I feel you too. And don't get me started on the relatives... They are downright cruel and straightforward. But this year's Chinese New Year, I was ready to bite them back (Polite but crude :P). They said "Oh, you've lost weight." So, they saved themselves. ROFL :P

    When I get married and have kids, I will never want my kids to go through the way I did; being fat and humiliated.
  • jooleeyah
    jooleeyah Posts: 70
    Hi All,

    Are there any other Asians out there trying to lose weight? What are your goals for weight and sizes?
    Doesn't it SUCK being the chubby Asian in the group? Growing up, all my friends were consistently 105lbs!! I was at least 30 lbs heavier than that in high school!! I've also got a larger frame that most Asians...I wear 27" waist jeans and will probably never fit into anything smaller thanks to my wide hips...but I suppose curves come with their benefits too :)

    I think my ultimate goal weight is 115 but I'd be happy between 115-120 at 5'2 1/2 :)
    at 125 lbs, I can STILL only fit into size XXXL when I go back to China. "Miss, I'm not sure we carry your size..."

    Mom was constantly on me to lose weight and catch a man...haha !

    Now that I've got one she doesn't want me to get too skinny because it's not good for bearing male grandchildren...

    LMAO, "Larger frame"? "27" jeans"? Your mom constantly trying to ask you to lose weight. Um, basically you haven't met me yet.

    Yes to your first question, I'm the Asian that REALLY NEED to lose weight, because I'm consider Obese, my BMI is way too high.

    Height is 5ft3. Current Weight is 180lbs.

    And does it SUCKS to be Chubby Asian in the ethnic group? How about it SUCKS TO THE CORE being the fattest in the "Asians-who-are-thin-but-still-thinks-they-are-fat" group. I'm not trying to be insulting or attacking you or anything. But you have no idea how I feel. My friends have been always the lighter, maybe to them, they are fat. But what about me? That's the reason losing weight in Asian countries, doesn't help. Because they are like "hey! I'm size number 2, I'm fat. I wanna go to size number -13, then I'll be satisfied" Try being size 18 all your life, then yeah, size 2 is like.... tiny weeny.

    Every time I'm at the bus stop or the train station or even just walking around outside, skinny Asian EVERYWHERE. Women are never satisfied their own body, I know that, but it's so exaggerating that they are so damn small, and yet they still complains that they are fat and ugly. (=_=) And I'm like, "okay... so if you're thin and still call yourself fat and ugly, so I'll be the big giant ogre then?"

    Sorry to just burst out like that, but I just can't help it. Asian girls who are size that small and yet they think they are fat will never understand what I am going through right now. So... yeah.

    But still, I will never give up in losing weight. It's just it's harder than everybody expected. If you're size 2, I'm size 18, I have to SUPER EXTRA harder than you. so.... be easy on yourself.

    I'm sorry if I insulted you in any way - that was not my intention. I may not be able to understand to extent of what you feel, but please know that I do believe that psychologically we suffer a very similar difficulty - just with a varying degree. There still is pressure to be thin, no matter how thin you are, especially with our shared cultural background. My mom had me chanting the Chinese tongue twister about having fat thighs...it's kind of funny now :) Even at my highest weight, I never thought I was obese - but I was unhappy where I was and am trying to get to a happier place. I never said I was 'fat', I generally use the words: chubby, round, and fluffy (my fav) to describe my shape. In comparison to my friends and by Asian standards...I am!

    Everything is relative, right?

    I recently lost about 20lbs, so I was at 145lbs at 5'2. I was always chubby as a kid (highest weight being 150 in high school - and I'm 2 inches shorter than you) and was never below 130 until I went away to college. I did not feel well at that time, none of my clothes fit and I refused to buy new ones so I wore leggings for the last year or so. Even at my current weight of around 125lbs, I'm still about 20lbs heavier than most of my friends (about 20% of my total body weight on a short frame). I feel healthy and happy at my weight but would still like to lose a bit more just because I would feel more comfortable with myself. My frame is much wider than most of my friends - hip measurement 38 inches and unlike to ever reduce no matter how much weight I lose. I am not, nor will I ever be, slender and delicate. I've learned to embrace my shape and my curves.

    It's not that I'm unsatisfied where I am - but I'd like to go a bit further, tone up and stay in shape for my health.
  • jooleeyah
    jooleeyah Posts: 70
    Male. 5ft7" currently 178lbs. While in Japan, people thought of me as heavy or fat. But those dudes are so skinny, it's funny. No muscle. I lift so my weight appears to be higher than it should be BMI - wise. Which I've learned to ignore.

    My bodyfat is approx 19%. Which is right there. Although I'd prefer t be in the mid-teens to maintain. But getting down to the 11% range just to see what that looked like would be nice.


    I think most Asian guys are too skinny. It's nice to know that you're representing solid muscular Asian guys :)

    What is your preference for Asian girls bodies? I don't feel like Asian guys are attracted to me (body AND personality). My mom once told me that an Asian guy would ever chose me...lol not since junior high anyways. When I use to go out with my friends, the dainty/delicate ones were always chosen first. I feel like most Asian guys don't even really like curves. I'm glad I'm in America where there are men who type a more voluptuous body type...I'd be single forever in China!!

    Thoughts?
  • Jeff92se
    Jeff92se Posts: 3,369 Member
    Male. 5ft7" currently 178lbs. While in Japan, people thought of me as heavy or fat. But those dudes are so skinny, it's funny. No muscle. I lift so my weight appears to be higher than it should be BMI - wise. Which I've learned to ignore.

    My bodyfat is approx 19%. Which is right there. Although I'd prefer t be in the mid-teens to maintain. But getting down to the 11% range just to see what that looked like would be nice.


    I think most Asian guys are too skinny. It's nice to know that you're representing solid muscular Asian guys :)

    What is your preference for Asian girls bodies? I don't feel like Asian guys are attracted to me (body AND personality). My mom once told me that an Asian guy would ever chose me...lol not since junior high anyways. When I use to go out with my friends, the dainty/delicate ones were always chosen first. I feel like most Asian guys don't even really like curves.

    Thoughts?

    The ultra skinny girls (asian or not) isn't particularlly attractive. I would rather date a woman on the curvy side vs the girl that looks like a 10 boy. But since I'm on a fitness kick again, I actually like a fit woman with some muscles. I saw one last night at the gym. Wasn't afraid to lift with us guys in the free weight room.

    Asian parents talk out of their *kitten* sometimes. You should really forget most of that neg crap they feed you.
  • jooleeyah
    jooleeyah Posts: 70
    I think my ultimate goal weight is 115 but I'd be happy between 115-120 at 5'2 1/2 :)
    at 125 lbs, I can STILL only fit into size XXXL when I go back to China. "Miss, I'm not sure we carry your size..."




    OMG!!! I'm half Japanese and have always been the fat asian. I went to China about six years ago when I was about 30lbs lighter (130) and shopping around for clothes really depressed me. My size 8 in America is a XXXL in China, Now I understand that us American's are generally fat, but come on 130lbs makes me an XXXL? I can't even imagine who would even fit into a small.

    NOTE: majority of you "fat" asians are not fat by any means. Celebrate your beauty and don't worry about what other people think of you.

    I feel your pain...I just ignore the size, buy what I can, and relish the great price/exchange rate!
  • CocoNuttie
    CocoNuttie Posts: 40
    I still remember a fight with my dad when I refused to tell him my weight and he pulled a scale out into a living room and tell me to get on it in front of everyone, I was like 19 yrs old and no more than 55kg(121lbs) then. My lil sis has the same fight 6 yrs later!! He hasn't learned a thing about having daughters. Funny thing is Asian is generally very polite to other ppl but can b very harsh to family members! -_-"

    I lost loads of weight before I went home, Thailand, in July. First time in yearsss my relative and family actually said I look great. I'm 51kg or 112lbs. Funny thing is I wasnt sure the compliments made me happy, I almost feel like I'd rather them ask if I was ok or if I was ill to look so skinny. Ofcourse they were asking what kind of (fad) diet I was on. No one get it when I said I was living a healthy way. Not until they see me gets up in the morning, do 6 miles run, then start the day.

    Best thing is now my dad doesn't ask how much I weight now, he asks how far I can run!! :) ppl do change after all
  • queenpushycat
    queenpushycat Posts: 762 Member
    Hi All,

    Are there any other Asians out there trying to lose weight? What are your goals for weight and sizes?
    Doesn't it SUCK being the chubby Asian in the group? Growing up, all my friends were consistently 105lbs!! I was at least 30 lbs heavier than that in high school!! I've also got a larger frame that most Asians...I wear 27" waist jeans and will probably never fit into anything smaller thanks to my wide hips...but I suppose curves come with their benefits too :)

    I think my ultimate goal weight is 115 but I'd be happy between 115-120 at 5'2 1/2 :)
    at 125 lbs, I can STILL only fit into size XXXL when I go back to China. "Miss, I'm not sure we carry your size..."

    Mom was constantly on me to lose weight and catch a man...haha !

    Now that I've got one she doesn't want me to get too skinny because it's not good for bearing male grandchildren...

    LMAO, "Larger frame"? "27" jeans"? Your mom constantly trying to ask you to lose weight. Um, basically you haven't met me yet.

    Yes to your first question, I'm the Asian that REALLY NEED to lose weight, because I'm consider Obese, my BMI is way too high.

    Height is 5ft3. Current Weight is 180lbs.

    And does it SUCKS to be Chubby Asian in the ethnic group? How about it SUCKS TO THE CORE being the fattest in the "Asians-who-are-thin-but-still-thinks-they-are-fat" group. I'm not trying to be insulting or attacking you or anything. But you have no idea how I feel. My friends have been always the lighter, maybe to them, they are fat. But what about me? That's the reason losing weight in Asian countries, doesn't help. Because they are like "hey! I'm size number 2, I'm fat. I wanna go to size number -13, then I'll be satisfied" Try being size 18 all your life, then yeah, size 2 is like.... tiny weeny.

    Every time I'm at the bus stop or the train station or even just walking around outside, skinny Asian EVERYWHERE. Women are never satisfied their own body, I know that, but it's so exaggerating that they are so damn small, and yet they still complains that they are fat and ugly. (=_=) And I'm like, "okay... so if you're thin and still call yourself fat and ugly, so I'll be the big giant ogre then?"

    Sorry to just burst out like that, but I just can't help it. Asian girls who are size that small and yet they think they are fat will never understand what I am going through right now. So... yeah.

    But still, I will never give up in losing weight. It's just it's harder than everybody expected. If you're size 2, I'm size 18, I have to SUPER EXTRA harder than you. so.... be easy on yourself.

    I'm sorry if I insulted you in any way - that was not my intention. I may not be able to understand to extent of what you feel, but please know that I do believe that psychologically we suffer a very similar difficulty - just with a varying degree. There still is pressure to be thin, no matter how thin you are, especially with our shared cultural background. My mom had me chanting the Chinese tongue twister about having fat thighs...it's kind of funny now :) Even at my highest weight, I never thought I was obese - but I was unhappy where I was and am trying to get to a happier place. I never said I was 'fat', I generally use the words: chubby, round, and fluffy (my fav) to describe my shape. In comparison to my friends and by Asian standards...I am!

    Everything is relative, right?

    I recently lost about 20lbs, so I was at 145lbs at 5'2. I was always chubby as a kid (highest weight being 150 in high school - and I'm 2 inches shorter than you) and was never below 130 until I went away to college. I did not feel well at that time, none of my clothes fit and I refused to buy new ones so I wore leggings for the last year or so. Even at my current weight of around 125lbs, I'm still about 20lbs heavier than most of my friends (about 20% of my total body weight on a short frame). I feel healthy and happy at my weight but would still like to lose a bit more just because I would feel more comfortable with myself. My frame is much wider than most of my friends - hip measurement 38 inches and unlike to ever reduce no matter how much weight I lose. I am not, nor will I ever be, slender and delicate. I've learned to embrace my shape and my curves.

    It's not that I'm unsatisfied where I am - but I'd like to go a bit further, tone up and stay in shape for my health.

    :smile: I agree with you... LOL, I wasn't insulted. (Maybe a little) But it's just a rant of frustration. :tongue: I didn't mean to sound so mean and harsh. There are a lot of girls here with your size are losing weight, and when I see them, I'm like "Okay, if they are trying to lose weight, then I still have a decade to go to catch up to them." Or worse, with my body shape, I will never be as thin as them. Gradually, I learned to ignore their words and say "It's a battle between me and my fats, not them." So yeah. lol... People here have been so great and kind to me even though we are strangers (as in never met in real life.) But just to let you know tt's really difficult. If you are here in Singapore, you'll blend right in, PERFECTLY. :laugh:
  • splackk
    splackk Posts: 163
    Ahaha, I'm definitely not Asian and don't have Asian parents, but I'm living in Asia and STILL get the remarks. I gained about 10 pounds after I moved and my BOSS told me I looked like I was putting on weight. WTF man, I'm doing my job just as well, stop looking at the size of my butt!

    Now that I've lost nearly everything I want to lose, I'm getting more comments taking hits at my old weight from everywhere. My boss continually telling me it's good I lost the weight, coworkers telling me I was much too fat to be healthy, even friends discussing my weight when we go out. I'm glad the comments now are positive, but if you have that much negative to say about how I looked a few months back I'm not sure we're on the same page, I'm still the same person, after all.

    Anyway, my actual family is the exact opposite. They lie out their teeth concerning weight. Last time I visited I was actually around 145 and all I got were "You look fantastic!" "You look so great!" Oh come now, I know I'm chubby, you don't have to pretend. I know they try and be sensitive but those comments draw as much attention as outright saying I'm too big.
  • jooleeyah
    jooleeyah Posts: 70
    Did you know that in China, when you apply for a job, you put down your height and weight and attach a picture and they can legally not hire you because you're overweight or not attractive enough??
  • jooleeyah
    jooleeyah Posts: 70
    Carolin, I totally understand :) I have friends who complain about their weights at 95-105lbs...l feel like I'll never catch up to that and I don't really want to.I also think that there are probably girls out there much larger than you who might think the same thing about you - that you look great and that they can't catch up to you.

    It's just about what is right for each person. I've got Latina friends who are happy at 150lbs and looooove all of their curves, yet when I was almost that weight, it wasn't right for me. I'm just here to support and encourage anyone who is trying to get where they want to be :)
  • Mrrwmoo
    Mrrwmoo Posts: 44
    Not only in China, but more so in Korea as well. That's why they're the main plastic surgery hub of Asia ;D. Japanese women go to Korea to get stuff done because it's much cheaper over there. Also, in Japan, they have physical exams at work places every year, and they fine the company if X number of employees are overweight. Guess who gets fired?! XDDD. The elderly in Japan get their waists measured every year too, so the government cracks down on those who have weight-related health problems to save money on the health system I guess.
  • jooleeyah
    jooleeyah Posts: 70
    I'm glad I live in America...
  • Mrrwmoo
    Mrrwmoo Posts: 44
    There's less pressure to be stick thin here, so I'm glad in that aspect ;D.
  • crdav13
    crdav13 Posts: 53 Member
    I totally hear you on this! I am freakishly tall for an asian (i'm 5'7)! I know I am by no means overweight.....at my height I'm currently at 138 (but trying to get down to 125-130) and still fitting into a size 2/4 but its hard not to feel like a giant next to someone who is 5'1 and 95lbs! My family is the same way, whenever you walk into a house its either "oh you gained weight" or "oh you look to skinny" but you can always bet there will be a comment of some sort!

    Maybe it would be good if the US was like other Asian countries and took measurements and whatnot, maybe then the US wouldn't have the obesity problem it does!
  • Mrrwmoo
    Mrrwmoo Posts: 44
    Being tall seems to be more preferred in Korea now though ;3. But you gotta be 100-110 lbs or you'll be considered fat ;-; . . .
    Soo Young from SNSD, a popular Korean girl group, is 5'7" + and she's only a little under 100 lbs, crazy >>.

    I see a massive uproar from America if the government started taking measurements XDD!!!
  • Lift_hard_eat_big
    Lift_hard_eat_big Posts: 2,278 Member
    My mother is 5' and 90 lbs, unfortunately I got her body type, I was 5'9" 130lbs at my high school graduation. I managed to dirty bulk during my Masters Program and was up to 170lbs 23% BF. A year later I'm in the last phase of my recomp and dropped down to 150lbs at 12% BF. Gonna start a clean bulk in Jan. 2012
  • ziggylove
    ziggylove Posts: 57
    I guess I am blessed to grow up in Hawaii because although there are a lot of us 'Asians' here there are also lots of folks of other races/ethnicities, not to mention many 'mixed' people (which I consider myself, though at first glance others probably label me Asian); meaning that we are all very used to seeing many varieties of body types regardless of race. I've also felt very blessed my parents didn't raise my sister and I in a 'traditional' way else I might have suffered the kinds of comments you describe. No doubt some of the Asian immigrants and the Japanese tourists think I am fat, but I have always thought they are too thin and could be probably snapped like brittle sticks. o_o One of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me about my looks was something from my Chinese-Hawaiian grandma who commented: "You look better with some weight." Anyway.. just wanted to say in closing that all of you look darn good, 'Asian' or not. :flowerforyou:
  • zoink66
    zoink66 Posts: 116 Member
    In China, I honestly think a lot of the weight comments don't come from a place of nastiness, but from a place of wanting that person to be his or her best. At least in my experience.

    China is really competitive and there's a high importance on fitting in. I think sometimes when I hear a friend's mother say, "Your gaining too much weight," it's because she's terrified that her daughter won't be as attractive or well off as other daughters, won't get as good of a job (yes, they really do require pictures for a lot of jobs as another poster said!), and might not find a good husband. China's modernizing, but if you're outside of the major cities, it's still extremely traditional and being "fat" (by Chinese standards) really does set you apart, and you don't want that.

    This doesn't really excuse parents or family members from making nasty comments about weight, but I think it does explain it a bit. And modesty is extremely important in China as well. As someone mentioned before, compliments are not handed out easily, so if someone tells you something is "not bad," that's actually a pretty good compliment. Likewise, if someone tells you you look "not so fat," or something like that, it's more like a Western person saying "You look great!"
This discussion has been closed.

Categories