ladies: how can we compliment without it being creepy?

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  • mikajoanow
    mikajoanow Posts: 584 Member
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    I think if you said that, and they took it the wrong way, that is on them. I think women can easily spot the creepy guy, and if its not obvious right away, it usually is sooner (rather than later). What you said does not sound creepy.
  • NiciS72
    NiciS72 Posts: 1,043 Member
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    Personally I like compliments. Now when I get a PM from some dude saying I saw you on the forum and you're hot THAT'S creepy! If the guy has not pics or info on his profile that is also a clue that he's most likely a creeper. If I've seen him post a lot on the boards then I generally know what kind of guy he is and don't take offense.

    I was NOT offended the other day when a dude responded about my underwear purchase NSV. I thought it was cool!
  • ThePhoenixRose
    ThePhoenixRose Posts: 1,985 Member
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    i think you could say any of those listed, and not even register on my creep-o-meter. i tend to like dirty comments, and take them as compliments, though even with that, it's easy to cross the line. i always send an email, warning that i like to talk dirty, that i cross some lines, and that i occasionally talk about sex. almost everyone is cool with it, and they let me know not to censor on their behalf. but, i got a message back from one guy saying he wanted to see me naked, and that he was stroking to my pics. THAT crosses even my line!

    so don't say that, k? thanks.

    I have your pic saved...and i always talk dirty to you ;) cus you are my sexy white chocolate


    but i like it when you do it, so that's not creepy. seriously, there are a few who can talk to me like that. you are one! he was not. this was our first ever interaction!!! ew!
  • Wingmistress
    Wingmistress Posts: 92
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    I often wonder this... both on sites like this one (where there are a lot of attractive people showing off attractive bodies) and just in every day life. As a guy, how can I give a woman a compliment without it being creepy or a come-on or whatever else.

    Say I see a profile pic of someone showing off their abs... can I send them a simple message saying "Hey, great abs!" or "wow, nice abs... your hard work is really paying off!"

    If I'm inline behind someone at Target and I notice their perfume, can I say, "I like your perfume"?

    Is there even such a thing as an innocent compliment any more?

    I see nothing wrong with your compliments. People who compliment are branded as creepy because of others who THINK this is a form of compliment. "Wow, you're hot. The things I would like to do with you..", etc. People immediately brand the decent as creepy.

    Compliment away!!!
  • Secret_Agent_007
    Secret_Agent_007 Posts: 1,082
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    I have your pic saved...and i always talk dirty to you ;) cus you are my sexy white chocolate



    Wow! Thats out there. But it still wouldn't bother me. :tongue:
  • Wingmistress
    Wingmistress Posts: 92
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    If I'm inline behind someone at Target and I notice their perfume, can I say, "I like your perfume"?

    This is one I struggle with. I steer clear of the physical appearance compliments in the real world unless I know the person well enough to where the intentions won't be misinterpreted.

    I also shy away from the perfurme compliments, but there are times it is so intoxicating I want to know what it is. I was having dinner with my daughter a couple weeks ago and the perfume of the waitress was amazing. I wanted to ask but I didn't.

    You should have asked. If she showed any sort of "offense" to a nice compliment, you just follow up with "my wife would love that". People are way too uptight about this stuff.
  • SyntonicGarden
    SyntonicGarden Posts: 944 Member
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    So calling you >> sugar tits << is out then? :grumble:

    That's actually how I sign my holiday cards.... ;)
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
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    Personally I like compliments. Now when I get a PM from some dude saying I saw you on the forum and you're hot THAT'S creepy! If the guy has not pics or info on his profile that is also a clue that he's most likely a creeper. If I've seen him post a lot on the boards then I generally know what kind of guy he is and don't take offense.

    I was NOT offended the other day when a dude responded about my underwear purchase NSV. I thought it was cool!

    THIS!
    Also.. i always think it's shady when people feel the need to message said compliments...but that's just me.
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,370 Member
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    As a public service reminder...if you are a midget it is probably a bad idea to walk up to a lady and tell her that her hair smells nice.
  • toots99
    toots99 Posts: 3,794 Member
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    I often wonder this... both on sites like this one (where there are a lot of attractive people showing off attractive bodies) and just in every day life. As a guy, how can I give a woman a compliment without it being creepy or a come-on or whatever else.

    Say I see a profile pic of someone showing off their abs... can I send them a simple message saying "Hey, great abs!" or "wow, nice abs... your hard work is really paying off!"

    If I'm inline behind someone at Target and I notice their perfume, can I say, "I like your perfume"?

    Is there even such a thing as an innocent compliment any more?

    I don't think that's creepy at all. It's all in how you say it. If you look all leery and were like "I like your perfuuuummmmee..." That would be yucky. Otherwise, keep it nice and simple. :smile:
  • mznisaelaine
    mznisaelaine Posts: 2,262 Member
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    As long as a guy knows the difference between giving a compliment and being preverted than it is generally acceptable. I can tell the difference.
  • liftingbro
    liftingbro Posts: 2,029 Member
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    As a public service reminder...if you are a midget it is probably a bad idea to walk up to a lady and tell her that her hair smells nice.

    I resmeble that comment.
  • staceyseeger
    staceyseeger Posts: 783 Member
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    I never pass up a compliment, giving or receiving! :wink: :wink: :wink:
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
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    As a public service reminder...if you are a midget it is probably a bad idea to walk up to a lady and tell her that her hair smells nice.

    i love you carl.
  • Lizmhoughton
    Lizmhoughton Posts: 92 Member
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    If you dont' have anything nice to say then say nothing at all, but I say if you have something nice then go for it. Just make sure there's no grunting, weird faces, and uncomfortable body language going on when you do. I wouldn't wink either. Those are the no-nos. :)
  • audigal2008
    audigal2008 Posts: 1,129 Member
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    THIS is Creepy!
    I was shopping with my 7 yrs old son. We were in the parking lot getting into my car and two older men started howling at me like dogs and then yelled How you doin? My son asked Mommy who are they? That was just rude IMO. Every girl likes to be complimented, when done in the right way it makes a gal feel good about herself
  • laylina
    laylina Posts: 50
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    I personally love getting compliments. It makes me feel more confident in myself and when your a mom its nice to know you still got it :laugh: . It sounds like you are being respectful and honest so go for it! you'll make at least one person smile. its the comments that are demeaning and disrespectful that are a no no
  • karenjoy
    karenjoy Posts: 1,840 Member
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    I like compliments, although not saying them to my chest helps
  • peripah
    peripah Posts: 120
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    It's all about context.

    Compliment I found to be creepy:

    I was attending a convention in another city a few weeks ago. Our whole club (we're board gamers - we're nerds, whatevs) attended. My friend and I got changed to go out one evening, then went back to the tables to tell everyone else that we were leaving.

    The next afternoon my friend and I were going to play a game with two guys from our club. My friend and one of the guys went to the bathroom and while I was alone with the other guy the conversation went like this:

    Him: Hey, I wanted to tell you - you looked really hot last night.
    Me: Oh! Well, thank you. Nice of you to say.
    Him: No, I mean, you looked HOT. Like, really hot. (Weird hand motions accompanied)
    Me, face starting to burn: Oh.... um... thanks.
    Him: You looked REALLY good.

    Could he have been hitting on me? Perhaps, but he's starting a new relationship and knows I'm married. I can take a compliment, even a flirty one, but that made me feel uncomfortable.

    What he could have said: "Hey, you looked great last night. Did you guys have fun?"
  • BeeElMarvin
    BeeElMarvin Posts: 2,086 Member
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    As a public service reminder...if you are a midget it is probably a bad idea to walk up to a lady and tell her that her hair smells nice.

    Thank you for the timely reminder.

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