Picky 7 year old!

No one's trying to be mean, just trying to express that a picky child is picky because of the parent.

That is really not true. My brother grew up in a household where we ate at Indian, Ethiopian, Morrocan, Japaenese, REAL Chinese (we lived in Europe) restaurants almost every night, or my parents would host a dinner party every weekend serving glazed duck or moussaka or something equally complex. My brother was still a picky eater. I was not. My cousin gives her kids all kinds of foods. One of her sons is a picky eater. The others are not. It has nothing to do with the parents.

THANK YOU!

No thats because of personality that the other two didnt become picky.The child that is picky is picky because the child is allowed to be picky.

Oh my....there was a lot of bashing going on here, when someone was asking for help! As a picky eater myself, I stand firm and srong on the issue of "tough love" and it not working. My parents tried the whole "eat what I cook or eat nothing and you will eventually get hungry." No eventually I still refused to eat, lost a lot of weight and the school tried turning my parents in for malnutrition...I would spit out EVERYTHING my parents gave me. It got to the point where I would sneak downstairs at night and get a bowl of cereal because I was sooooo hungry! My parents let me eat hotdogs every night so I would stay alive. They would throw in fruit when possible of hide pureed carrots in spaghetti sauce if they could. Food tramautized me so much as a child I still refuse to try new things to this day. You CAN NOT CHANGE a picky eater....to this day I HATE most veggies. I have just learned how to substitute into my diet lots of fruits and the veggies I do eat.

WOW. Maybe some of you should stop judging the OP. Are you all perfect parents? SHEESH!

I was on foodstamps for almost eight months back in 2006. I was a single, unemployed mother who got $186 in foodstamps each month. Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and spaghetti with plain marinara were staples in our home during that time. You can buy a cheap loaf of white bread (ick) and a jar of peanut butter and jelly for $5 and get 12 sandwiches out of it. It becomes a problem between buying healthy food and buying filling food. It's not an easy decision, but seriously, sometimes it's what gets you through. Until you've had to choose between a pot of mac and cheese for .65 cents and one tomato for the same cost, STOP JUDGING.

As far as snack cakes go, when you're poor, there is mental turmoil in the fact that you can't buy your kid new clothes, the toys his friends have or a fancy new bike. So you give the kid a Ding Dong instead. It's a bad habit and it's setting the kid up for bad choices in the future, yes-- but being poor is a serious struggle when you see your kid suffering. You'd do anything to see him smile. And sometimes a Ding Dong will make him smile. I'm not saying he should eat a box a day, of course, but at least try to put yourself in her shoes before you judge.

To the OP, try letting him make his own stuff or making a game of it. My daughter is 7 and I notice that one sure thing to get her to try something new is those stupid sample stations at Sam's Club. She gets excited and will try things she'd NEVER try at home. Try making a game of it-- play "sample." Or make a mini "buffet" of healthy things. Make it creative and they'll be more likely to eat healthily. Also, try making the things he already eats healthier. Instead of white bread, switch to a light bread or a whole wheat bread. Buy naturally sweetened preserves (like Polaner All-Fruit) instead of regular jelly.

Thank you so much for what you said! I have no job, which means no extra income, which also means that 200 is the ONLY money I have for food. so yeah buying the "crap" lasts longer throughout the month than buying healthy food that will last two weeks. Until you have been poor you dont know how hard it is to buy food. Not only do I have to use that money to buy food for the house that also includes 5 meals a week for school.
I am so tired of people telling me that being poor means nothing and that I can still provide the good stuff for my son. No I can not. the last time I tried to buy nothing but healthy food on my FS I ran out of food two weeks before I got more FS. I am done defending myself against the over oppinionated people that seem to think they know the "right" way of doing things. Until you are flat *kitten* poor and broke, shut up!

Shut up? OK HERE I GO! My ex left a month ago and isnt paying child support. I have no income and am a full time student. 3OO a month in food stamps and guess what?!? WE DONT HAVE THE MONEY FOR CRAPPY FOOD! I have THREE kids! Check my food diary people! Learn to shop better!

WOW. Maybe some of you should stop judging the OP. Are you all perfect parents? SHEESH!

I was on foodstamps for almost eight months back in 2006. I was a single, unemployed mother who got $186 in foodstamps each month. Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and spaghetti with plain marinara were staples in our home during that time. You can buy a cheap loaf of white bread (ick) and a jar of peanut butter and jelly for $5 and get 12 sandwiches out of it. It becomes a problem between buying healthy food and buying filling food. It's not an easy decision, but seriously, sometimes it's what gets you through. Until you've had to choose between a pot of mac and cheese for .65 cents and one tomato for the same cost, STOP JUDGING.

As far as snack cakes go, when you're poor, there is mental turmoil in the fact that you can't buy your kid new clothes, the toys his friends have or a fancy new bike. So you give the kid a Ding Dong instead. It's a bad habit and it's setting the kid up for bad choices in the future, yes-- but being poor is a serious struggle when you see your kid suffering. You'd do anything to see him smile. And sometimes a Ding Dong will make him smile. I'm not saying he should eat a box a day, of course, but at least try to put yourself in her shoes before you judge.

Again, these are still choices made and excuses given. I get the situations, I've BEEN THERE for YEARS! I know how it is to only have "food money" to use for a birthday party instead of real cash to buy presents. I have wrapped up their favorite sugary cereal and fruit snacks as presents so they felt like they got more gifts besides new underwear. I get that, believe me, I do....but this is a lifestyle that needs altering. You can't use the excuse of not having enough money to eat healthy. Because I'm there every single day.

No one's trying to be mean, just trying to express that a picky child is picky because of the parent.

That is really not true. My brother grew up in a household where we ate at Indian, Ethiopian, Morrocan, Japaenese, REAL Chinese (we lived in Europe) restaurants almost every night, or my parents would host a dinner party every weekend serving glazed duck or moussaka or something equally complex. My brother was still a picky eater. I was not. My cousin gives her kids all kinds of foods. One of her sons is a picky eater. The others are not. It has nothing to do with the parents.

Ok, there is no comparison there.....I'd be picky too if it's "weird" food (as a child would see different ethnic foods to be)....but to have a child exposed to processed canned goods and candy and snack cakes and refuse to eat healthy foods IS the parents fault. You're twisting things.

No, I'm not twisting things, I didn't say my cousin raised her kids eating what you call "weird" food, and I didn't say we only ever ate those kinds of foods - even if we had, I don't think those foods would be weird to those in the ethnic background. Again, we were not raised in America. These foods were "normal" for where we were raised. My brother as a kid and my cousin's kid did/do not eat veggies. No matter how they were cooked. My point was that it doesn'tmatter sometimes what the parent feeds or tries to feed. Sometimes picky eaters are just picky.

Few of you are helpful, but the majority of you seem to think that asking for tips means judge my choices. I will feed him what he likes regardless, but I asked for tips to ADD healthier foods, not replace with. Thank you, but no thank you.

Why would anyone want to feed their kid garbage? I'm not judging, but I'm curious. We ate junk food as kids maybe once a month as a "treat." We didn't expect spaghetti-o's every day. Junk food is not supposed to be part of your everyday diet, especially as a growing child. Processed junk on a regular basis is just setting a kid up for an unhealthy future.

I was raised on "garbage" so to me it was fine. I just over ate it growing up. I dont let my son over eat it.

Not bashing, but I think you have it backwards.. my pedi has always told me that I control what my boys eat, they decide the amounts that they eat. So even if you don't intend for him to over eat.. how can you inforce that? How can you tell when enough is a enough for a 7 year old. The go through so many growth spurts and all. At times my 4 and 2 year old can empty our fridge in pantry in 3 days.. other times I wonder how they are functioning on the amounts they eat. Just something I wanted to mention.

Thank you so much for what you said! I have no job, which means no extra income, which also means that 200 is the ONLY money I have for food. so yeah buying the "crap" lasts longer throughout the month than buying healthy food that will last two weeks. Until you have been poor you dont know how hard it is to buy food. Not only do I have to use that money to buy food for the house that also includes 5 meals a week for school.
I am so tired of people telling me that being poor means nothing and that I can still provide the good stuff for my son. No I can not. the last time I tried to buy nothing but healthy food on my FS I ran out of food two weeks before I got more FS. I am done defending myself against the over oppinionated people that seem to think they know the "right" way of doing things. Until you are flat *kitten* poor and broke, shut up!

I just wonder, how if you say you have no income, no job, you have $200 a month for food...how do you have the internet? Are you incapable of working? Go apply at Mcdonald's if you have to. SOMEONE is always hiring. The area I live in was hit HARD because of the economy and I know all the restaurants, fast food places, etc. still hire.

Is it just you and him? Because I was feeding a family of four off of a budget of $280/month. That includes a grown male, myself and my two children ages 7 and 8. This also included 10 lunches/week for them for school. That was a budget that I created for us because there's no need to spend a lot of money of food. I never once had a problem finding things to make and having left overs to get extra stuff.

If its just you and your son, that's $50 a week. That is plenty. Talk to your local grocery stores, they will tell you when they get produce in. On those days, they always have their older produce practically free, but you have to be there fairly early. I am assuming since you don't have a job you can go once your son in school. I buy this when I can and freeze what we won't eat that day or the day after.

Junk food is more expensive. Maybe you need help with healthy meals? Maybe you need help cooking? Google it.

This is sort of a "button-pushing" topic for me as I have been in VERY tight financial situations (read $300/month grocery budget for a family of 5 including an adult male and a breastfeeding female) and still managed to plan healthy and balanced meals for my family.
I am not sure what the OP is looking for as you have rejected all the ideas offered to you. You don't plan on changing your shopping habits, you don't think this stuff is bad for your son, you seem to think it provides adequate nutrients (and if not then the vitamin picks up the slack), so...what are you after?
If you want your son to eat healthier then you are going to have to dig deeper than hiding some veggies in his spaghetti-o's and gimmicky food nights.
He's 7. He can understand "I'm sorry, but spaghetti-o's are not in the budget this week, but I'm making a homemade marinara instead and would love some help."
I honestly couldn't tell you how much spaghetti-o's cost, but I know that you can buy a can of tomatoes, frozen peppers & onions, dried italian seasoning and a box of name-brand protein enriched noodles for $5-6. And with only 2 of you eating there is at least 3 meals in that. And my 10 year old LOVES left over noodles in her lunch bag.
My suggestion is to replace the junk with reasonable options. Frozen is cheaper than fresh. And shop at markets for in-season bulk foods. Green beans are a good deal now, and if you roast them they taste almost like french fries. And choose a treat night and bake something yourself. Or make a dessert at the beginning of the week to portion out throughout the week. Make your own waffles and pancakes from scratch and freeze them. It's CHEAPER and you can add healthy ingredients.
Breakfast favorites at my house are eggs, homemade granola, homemade pancakes and waffles, and homemade muffins. None of these items cost more than $.50 per serving.
Lunch favorites are noodles (my kids love macaroni so I cook them protein-enriched noodles and add a small amount of shredded cheese), soups (usually made from leftover meats and veggies), and of course pb sandwiches. Again--super reasonable.
They eat things like apples and peanut butter (or lately pumpkin and yogurt dip), yogurt, chocolate milk, in-season fruit, occasionally smoothies, popcorn (instead of chips), graham crackers (instead of cookies) for snacks. These are all inexpensive and healthy alternatives, yet still kid-friendly.
And for dinners...we serve a BALANCED meals. They don't always choose to eat it, but we encourage them to try a bite of everything. And no snacks unless they do.
Put it in front of him. Explain why you've made it. Express your empathy.

Also...I agree with allowing your kids to eat as much as they want. I would never limit my children's meals. So when my 10 year old girl ate 5 (FIVE!) portions of spaghetti squash lasagna (which, coincidentally cost about $5 for the entire meal) I encouraged her. Our pediatrician also stresses quality and allowing them to eat as much healthy food as they want.

Lastly...I am willing to bet a month's salary that a child has never been taken from their parent because their parent stopped buying junk food and the child decided to not eat the healthy choices being served.

perfectly said!

He used to be way more open to different foods. As a baby he loved anything green: spinach lasagna, chicken and broccoli, ect. He used to love steak and pork chops. The older he got the less he was willing to try. I have tried the "you can only eat what I cook foods" and that resulted in him sitting at the table for 3 hours not eatting anything. I am not the type of person to force a child to do anything. Not for 3 hours at least. Don't think that he gets away with what he wants and doesnt have to do anything he is told, that is not true. His Dr has told me not to worry too much about what he eats because right now he is perfectly healthy and not over weight at all.

you are setting it up as a battle of wills... my 6 year old would sit there for a month and scream and fight. That is not how i play the game. When we are done eating we clean up and walk away. I let him leave his plate out for a while if he changes his mind before bed time. I would never force him to sit there.

Few kids are stubborn enough to starve themselves...

Exactly my thoughts. I think most people don't realize how "open" kids get when they know something else ain't coming. Hunger is a helluva motivator. And no, (for the other parents that don't approve) the child won't whither away if they don't get dinner one day.

If the rest of us finishes our dinner, we get deesert. Nothing like eating our deserts in front of the one that decides not to eat their veggies that night. haha

bossypants....

:laugh:

Thank you! I have seen my son refuse to eat for a day and a half because I tried to keep him from eating what he liked. That resulted in him telling his school that I am refusing to feed him and me getting CPS called.

That's messed up how kids will retaliate like that. At 7? I still think it's a battle of the wills here. If he's going to pull THAT, then you aren't going to get him to eat things he doesn't like. Why? Well because he knows you won't go there.

If you try the hard core method again, I'd make sure to write a letter to the school before hand. Or try thiis on a friday so you have the weekend to battle.