Parents Please Wake Up
Replies
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I understand your passion about this, and agree that it's a huge problem. I try to keep in mind that people are working with the only means they have - which in many cases, isn't much. Many are poorly educated and just downright poor. They're focused on keeping their children full, not nourished. A child's education includes very little on nutrition, and adults certainly are not educated on it. And even if this education did exist, it doesn't help kids in inner-cities who have little to no access to vegetables and whole grains.
Not everyone lives a good life. I grew up living in other people's bedrooms or on their couches for a period. Do you (general, not directed to one person) think my mom was worried about my nutrition? She worked 2-3 jobs sometimes and bought me fast food so she could have dinner with me before running off to her next job. She bought me more fast food when we were cut off of food stamps as well, when her income went up. It's cheap to feed many people from the Dollar Menu. Sad but true.
- lack of formal education on nutrition
- lack of resources or access to healthier foods
- lack of time/money
Things to consider when we see the state of our children's health today. That, to me, is sadder than watching a kid inhale his 5th Happy Meal that week.
Thanks for this. You said it way better than I could have. I feel like when people make posts like this they almost always leave out the scenario of the parents who are doing the best they can and either can't afford or lack knowledge about proper nutrition/health. A disproportionate number of children with weight problems actually come from families like this. I was one of the luckier ones, but I grew up with so many people who weren't, and what I learned is that it's a problem way bigger than anything that can be solved by telling parents to "wake up."0 -
I would argue that its not the food thats making children fat, its the lack of activity. I ate fast food, pizza etc.. growing up, pretty regularly but I played a lot of sports and ran around the neighborhood with friends.
Exactly!!!
The school systems have cut physical education funding. Some schools do not have any PE class at all. I ate junk growing up and was very thin, even into my teens. Every year my parents had me in a sport program - outside of school. And, we constantly ran the streets, playing outside for hours at a time. It was safe and fun. We didn't know we were exercising.
Let's face it, times have changed. It is not safe to let your kids play freely outside for hours at a time. Schools can't afford PE classes. And most families can't afford private sport lessons. We have to take it upon ourselves to make a difference. Petition the schools for better PE programs, walk/play with your kids and quit making excuses.0 -
I am very conscious of the way I feed my children (5 & 8) because I want them to be as healthy as possible and I don't want them to develop bad habits that they struggle with in adulthood (like myself). I write a blog (now more of a facebook page) that gives other parents and idea of how easy and affordable it is to provide a healthy diet for their kiddos, and how kids don't have to be picky eaters...we usually make them that way!
http://www.facebook.com/whataremykidseating0 -
also, the opposite is not the best way.
I grew up fighting over sweets with my older brother, because our mom never bought them to us, she didn't want us to get fat and ruin our teeth.
When we got them as present we would always fight about who got more...
So i became selfish and when i'm eating chocolate or something it's like i'm afraid my brother is going to eat it instead, and there will be no chocolate left for me.
This is why I gained weight.
Now that i'm older and i'm living alone, i make all the food decisions by myself, i can have all the junk food i want... but still there's that "child nature" in me.
of course, children like sweets, but making them available will maybe make children crave them less... and not care about the candy drawer.
oh and by the way, my brother is overweight now too, the reason i'm slim is that i'm watching what i eat.
so it affected both of us.
I agree with this. My father was very strict and NEVER would let us eat out. My mother was a little more lenient, but we had to hide it from my dad on those rare occasions. My little brother was overweight his whole life, since he was a baby (very chubby as well) - I was always thin (until I got pregnant) - well my brother would also want more than his fair share of whatever we were allowed to have, and we often fought and since I was older my mother would make me let my brother have it.. Wellllllllll... now... I seem to "hoard" food. I hate sharing food, I hate people eating off my plate, and I always felt like in a group eating I had to take more than my fair share because I thought there would never be enough for me. Weird how the brains works.0 -
I don't understand what some parents are thinking when they buy their kids fast food nearly every day and give them stuff like pizza, chips, candy, and coke on a regular basis. Those things should be "treats" that are had only every once in a while. So many families feed their children junk food every day, and that is making generation after generation of obese people. I was 250 lbs by the time I was in jr high and 300 lbs by the time I was in high school. When you're a kid you're not born knowing what a proper meal should look like or what a portion size should be, we only know what we are shown and taught by our parents. It all starts when we are kids. If we learn bad eating habits and are never taught right, it's something we have to struggle with and try to over come when we are adults, which makes it a thousand times more difficult.
I've been struggling for years to undo the damage that my upbringing has done to my body as well as my mind. I have a very long way to go and it's extremely hard, but I'm doing it. And it pisses me off to see parents out there doing the same thing to their kids that my parents did to me. And it makes me want to shake their parents and scream - WAKE UP! Can’t you see what you’re DOING? Because when I look in the mirror at the 340 lb woman staring back at me I'm looking at THEIR future. And that breaks my heart.
If you’re a parent I’m begging you, BEGGING you, to put your foot down and turn things around for your children. YOU are the one shaping your child’s body and mind. You have control over what goes in your shopping cart and what goes on your table. You’re the parent. Love them enough to make the right choices for them.
I know I'm probably going to get flamed for this post, but I don't care. If just one parent reads this post and decides to make healthier choices for their family then it's worth it.
This is EXACTLY the reason I want to become a community dietitian, hopefully working with low income families. We spend so much on healthcare already these days and so many adults are on medications for diabetes, blood pressure, heart disease, etc. and so much could be prevented with education, it just has to be made available. There is even research to show that diet can reduce symptoms of allergies, asthma, ADHD, autism, and many other conditions that plague children today; along with the fact that children born after the year 2000 are projected to live shorter lives than their parents for the first time in history because of their lifestyle habits, there is no reason for this in developed countries. Great post!
P.S. We ate junk growing up and my mother honestly hates vegetables and most fruits (she admitted to me that when my sister is away at college she buys none. NONE!) and luckily I never got fat from it but I did have bad allergies and asthma and I've noticed that now that I eat clean with lots of fresh fruits and veggies that I no longer suffer from asthma and allergy symptoms but I haven't even caught a cold in YEARS! I really think eating right has a lot to do with overall heath.0 -
What I don't understand is people saying that fast food is cheaper. I grew up the youngest of six kids, on just Dad's income as a mechanic. I never felt like we were "poor" (we were, but my folks were good at stretching dollars) but there's now way we could have afforded McDonalds or pizza at every meal. In fact, on those rare occasions we had McD's, my Dad would go to the drive thru and get burgers, while Mom stayed home with us and cooked her own fries. A couple potatoes, or even a big bag of Oreida, is a lot cheaper than eight small fries! Not to mention that a gallon of KoolAid is way way way cheaper than eight soft drinks. For that matter, homemade burgers are a lot less expensive than even dollar menu burgers, and way tastier now that I'm not a dumb kid. But it was a special treat for us to get McDonalds, and they gave in once in a while.
Just about all the meals I cook for my husband and myself cost around $5 for the two of us. You can get a lot of meals out of a Big Pack of chicken breast ($1.99/pound on sale), a bag of mixed frozen veggies ($1.79 for 16oz bag for store brand) and box of dry pasta or rice ($.99 for 16oz on sale or store brand). Add some kind of sauce/marinade for flavor, and you have a balanced tasty and FILLING meal. On the other hand, if we each got a burger, fry and drink from the dollar menu, we'd be talking $6 and I know damn well neither one of us would be satisfied.0 -
I understand your passion about this, and agree that it's a huge problem. I try to keep in mind that people are working with the only means they have - which in many cases, isn't much. Many are poorly educated and just downright poor. They're focused on keeping their children full, not nourished. A child's education includes very little on nutrition, and adults certainly are not educated on it. And even if this education did exist, it doesn't help kids in inner-cities who have little to no access to vegetables and whole grains.
Not everyone lives a good life. I grew up living in other people's bedrooms or on their couches for a period. Do you (general, not directed to one person) think my mom was worried about my nutrition? She worked 2-3 jobs sometimes and bought me fast food so she could have dinner with me before running off to her next job. She bought me more fast food when we were cut off of food stamps as well, when her income went up. It's cheap to feed many people from the Dollar Menu. Sad but true.
- lack of formal education on nutrition
- lack of resources or access to healthier foods
- lack of time/money
Things to consider when we see the state of our children's health today. That, to me, is sadder than watching a kid inhale his 5th Happy Meal that week.
i have to disagree about lack of money we dont have hardly any money (i mean we cant even treat ourselfs to a coffee out) but we always make sure that we do get a good meal in my daugther and ourselfs. but i suppose some people with limited income will have other things in priority first.0 -
What I don't understand is people saying that fast food is cheaper. I grew up the youngest of six kids, on just Dad's income as a mechanic. I never felt like we were "poor" (we were, but my folks were good at stretching dollars) but there's now way we could have afforded McDonalds or pizza at every meal. In fact, on those rare occasions we had McD's, my Dad would go to the drive thru and get burgers, while Mom stayed home with us and cooked her own fries. A couple potatoes, or even a big bag of Oreida, is a lot cheaper than eight small fries! Not to mention that a gallon of KoolAid is way way way cheaper than eight soft drinks. For that matter, homemade burgers are a lot less expensive than even dollar menu burgers, and way tastier now that I'm not a dumb kid. But it was a special treat for us to get McDonalds, and they gave in once in a while.
Just about all the meals I cook for my husband and myself cost around $5 for the two of us. You can get a lot of meals out of a Big Pack of chicken breast ($1.99/pound on sale), a bag of mixed frozen veggies ($1.79 for 16oz bag for store brand) and box of dry pasta or rice ($.99 for 16oz on sale or store brand). Add some kind of sauce/marinade for flavor, and you have a balanced tasty and FILLING meal. On the other hand, if we each got a burger, fry and drink from the dollar menu, we'd be talking $6 and I know damn well neither one of us would be satisfied.
yep have to agree with you! there is noway could be able to afford fast food most nites. you sound like me can make a good meal out of a few pounds
i also love the task of trying to be inventive with my meals and getting it under a certain amount but that could be just me :laugh: 0 -
There is a balance and it can be tough to make it happen. We've taught my son the difference between healthy food and unhealthy food and at the age of 5, he understands that there are just some things we don't eat every day, but that treats are ok too. For example, he of course loves fun kids cereals, but we buy a variety and give him the choice of heart healthy, muscle building, or treat cereal (the treat cereal is only an option once maybe twice a week). He usually goes with muscle building, but sometimes with excitement he says, "HEART HEALTHY!!" The problem with many parents is that they give up on kids who are picky eaters and give them only the foods that they will eat without any backlash. After being consistent with exposing our son to many foods, I can proudly say that we went to a Hibachi restaurant last weekend and Gabriel's favorite things were the Salmon and Broccoli!0
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oops...sorry, double post!0
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I would have to agree that it does start with the parents. Parents are children's first role models. My 4 girls ages 7,4,3 and 2 are not overweight but since I have gotten healthier they have picked up on my good habits. They have always eaten lots of fruits and veggies but now they eat whole wheat, ground turkey etc and they haven't noticed any change as opposed to other things. They exercise with me by choice
They just watched my husband and I complete a 5k. It feels good to know I've made this change for my family early on. If I hadn't they could have been on my roller coaster ride to obesity. However I didn't remove all sweets from the house because I think that can also develop them being secret eaters like others have posted.
My oldest daughter's school has a program where a nutritionist "Mrs. Healthy" comes to school and talks to them about food choices and even gives them samples and has them help make a healthy snack. I think it's a fabulous idea and really got her thinking and asking me if we could buy a few things that she had talked about 0 -
Interesting topic. I do agree to some extent with the earlier poster about not offering up any solutions. You've obviously put some thought into it so what are your opinions on what should be done? Personally, I agree that it starts with education. My mother recently had a quadruple bypass, is now seeing a dietician among other things, and still has trouble making better choices. I think if she would have been educated when she was younger she wouldn't be having so much trouble now.
Also, while I appreciate your passion, this message board isn't exactly your target audience. I'm assuming most people here are trying to improve themselves. Given that you feel so passionately about this, do you have any ideas about how to get your message out to people who aren't taking an active interest in a healthier lifestyle?0 -
To start, most parents do what they know or think is best. I don't think parents ever have a cruel intention of making their kids un-healthy or overweight, I'm pretty sure most parents would like to avoid that teenage angst coming from depressed girls and boys too I assume. My mom/dad meant well, they just didn't know about proper nutrition past fruits/veggies/beans. this didn't stop the fast food and pantry full of snack cakes though.Young or old we eat what we want. Filling the refrig with fruits, vegs, low fat whatever, Isn't going to stop school trading and just plain not eating. How healthy is not eating at all? Children are influenced more out of the house then in. It's called fitting in or finding persons like themselves. At any age we can decide when we want to control how much we eat 14 or 40. Blaming other people for our own choices is like saying we are not in control of ourselves. "Only I can hurt me, should I choice". Power, will and choice are ours to control.
That mindset makes this issue and other more serious issues in our society seem not fixable if you boil it down to a gleaming generalization about how peers influence more than parents. though that's true, that doesn't mean that parents give UP all their rights to their peers. in this man's case (the way he's thinking) we should just group everyone on an island by age and let us all raise each other. until those peers start providing a roof over said kids head, if a parent does their job by showing the kids proper nutrition then they've taught all they could, and then it is up to the child what they do. if you do not know better you will not do better and that is as simple as that.0 -
I do agree with the point that the parents influence the kids eating habits. I also agree that it is not so simple as saying 'Feed your kids better food'.
I'd suggest Googling the term 'food desert' and reading up on this concept. There are people who end up eating junk daily not necessarily because the food is cheaper (which ounce for ounce it's not) but when you factor in transportation, some people do not have ACCESS to grocery stores when all they have within walking distance (because some people do not own cars, or have the storage space to store a lot of groceries) are fast-food places and convenience stores.
I also agree that lack of activity is a big issue, and part of it is our culture of fear. I do NOT think that the world is much more dangerous than it ever was (although I have the privilege of living in a small town on a not-so-busy street.. others are not that lucky) but that we are so saturated with messages of kids getting kidnapped and molested that we are hyper-aware of the risks that have frankly, always been there.
Get to know your neighbors. I think we need to foster the 'village to raise a child mentality' so that we can go back to the days when we COULD let kids out for hours at a time. And turn off the TV, cause not only does it make the kids fat, it makes the parents paranoid.0 -
It seems that what we have proven here is that this stuff is not easy. It should come as no surprise that people spend their entire lives studying health and how to make it better and even in that community there is disagreement. The problem is not just the parents responsibility and not just the Government/education/medical or whatever other "windmill" you wish to tilt at but rather it is some combination of all of these. If you feel as strongly about the health of the children try a different approach, because attacking the parents without really understanding what their situation is will yield nothing but defensive parents. They will shut down and assume you just have an ax to grind and will not make any useful changes. This kind of transformation takes effort and will not be easy. Just for an experiment the nest time you see parents who need to "Wake Up" that instead of pointing out their failures you spend some time getting to know them and finding out ways to help them make the right choices, help them through their daily problems and find solutions for them.0
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Wonderful topic!
Parents are to blame for the epidemic of child obesity in our nation.
It's disgusting enough when we ruin our own health getting fat, but not our own kids. We have 5 boys, and from the moment they could walk they've all done daily exercise under my supervision. And once they turned 14, I never needed to tell them; they had their own programs.
Not a single one of my kids is fat. They're all muscled, strong, fit and well adjusted, making good grades and at the top of the social heap. And then I see my neighbors' kids unable to play rough, throw a ball or do much of anything off the computer. Most are taking some medication and one poor kid is actually already a diabetic.
It's disgusting. These obese little underachievers have already had their self-esteem crushed, and they'll battle the damaging results the rest of their lives.0 -
When I was little, there were always fruits and veggies in the house, but they were my 'dad's' food. My brother and I got into the habit of sneaking food from a very little age because it was all for someone else. I still find myself doing that to this day. For my kids, nothing is off limits in the house to eat, but we talk about the food. They are learning that there are foods you can eat whenever you are hungry (fruits, veggies, lean meats, fish, etc.) and food that you don't eat all the time (pizza, corn dogs, ice cream). We put kid size portions of food on their plates, and if they are hungry for more, they can have it. When they have ice cream, it is in mini ice cream cones, they get a few tblsp of ice cream. It is the perfect size for them and keeps the calories in check. I can only hope that as they grow older, they have better habits than I do!0
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Hi
My childrens favourite meals are cod fillets baked with a sprinkle of parmesan served with broccili and baked potatoes, or a nice rare steak.
We taught them from birth that fast food is ok for a treat but they hate Mcdonalds (apart form the shakes) so if they are naughty we threaten to take them there for dinner lol
I have always advocated that no food is 'bad' as that leads to issues but everything in moderation. They both have a very heatlhy attitude to food as nothing has been denied them but both would choose strawberries or satsumas over sweets and chocolate so we must have done something right.
They are boys aged 9 and 11.
martyxx
This is exactly what my husband and I plan to try when we have children. I think that if you can teach them moderation at a young age then they will have the knowledge and ability to make good decisions when they get older!0 -
I agree that as a culture we rely on junk and fast food way too much. But I think our kids eating habits are a learned behavior. So many of us learned how to eat in a more healthy manner out of necessity (to lose weight), so we really don't know enough to teach our children. Then there are others who just don't know how to not give in to their kids whining and begging. Then there are some for whom fast food is financially cheaper and faster than going home and preparing a better meal. There have been many days in my life, where I have had 5.00 in my pocket and that's enough to buy 3 burgers and two fries for the kids to split. With a glass of milk or water, that's a meal! (Albeit not a healthy one, but it does put something in their bellies) With some of the food prices nowadays, that would only have bought a small package of meat, definitely not a nutritious meal.
So, while many people are lazy, or whatever, there are a lot of reasons people do not feed themselves or their children properly.0 -
I can tell you that as a kid growing up my parents really didn't buy junk food and pizza was a once every couple weeks thing. But we usually had the giant buckets of ice cream in the freezer and mom made a lot of fried food. But, I played outside from sun up to sun down, participated in sports, and all kinds of things until I left school. Then when I could make my own food and exercise decisions I made a lot of really bad ones and ended up fat.
I don't blame my parents for this. I made the choices and I watched myself balloon up to 300lbs. My kids are thin, and we eat pizza, and sometimes fast food, and sometimes other junk. But more often than not, I make them a well balanced meal and tell them when we eat junk food that it's not good for us but is okay once in a while.
ALSO, like BobbyClerici they exercise at my house. Stuff like my gym teacher taught me. Sit-ups, Push-ups, Jumping jacks. When the weather gets nice again they'll be outside jump roping with me.
To summarize. As Parent's it's our job to give our kids the knowledge and tools to make the right choices and hope that as adults they use it.0 -
Exactly!Just posting that parents should be healthier doesn't help the problem. You've posed no solution to the problem other than 'parents should do better'. The problem is far more complex than that and acting like it's a simple matter is, in my opinion, a disservice.
Don't be so myopic. One doesn't have to have a mapped out strategy plan to call attention to a problem. Sometimes just starting a dialog about an issue can be helpful and plant some seeds.
And it's not like they don't know what to do already - we all did long before we took ownership of our health.
Eat less - move more!
There's the solution.:drinker:0 -
I would argue that its not the food thats making children fat, its the lack of activity. I ate fast food, pizza etc.. growing up, pretty regularly but I played a lot of sports and ran around the neighborhood with friends. I was a skinny kid. I didnt get over weight until I got married, had kids and started working a job where I sat on my butt all day. Kids nowadays dont go outside, they dont ride around the neighborhood on their bikes. They sit in front of a tv and play X Box. When I was a kid I would wake up on Saturday morning and eat breakfast and my dad would say "go outside and play" I would go outside till lunch, then back out till dinner then back out till street lights came on. That doesnt happen now. Kids dont even walk around mow lawns anymore. adults do.
Honestly I have to disagree with this,
I got given healthy food (with some sweets occasionally) all the way through high school and weighed 100 pounds. In college I started working in and eating fast food whilst still running around the park and riding on my bike. Not everyone is the same, me and a few friends - sure we are inside sometimes but a lot of the time we will just go for random walks around outside, etc. And I then put on the weight as it did not cancel out the amount of cals eaten.0 -
The reason I woke up from this vicious cycle of unhealthy lifestyle was because I became a father. As soon as my beautiful daughter was born something clicked in me that I needed to show her the right way to eat and avoid being another statistic on the whole "America is obese" category. I am not a healthy 151 pounds (down from 205) and I haven't felt better in my life.
It is all thanks to my lovely daughter: Daddy loves you!!!0 -
IMO, pizza, depending on where you buy it, is FAR from the worst thing you can get your kid. I like Papa Murphy's take and bake because they use quality ingredients and don't load the crust down with grease like places like Pizza Hut, and you can get loads of veggies on it.0
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I do not buy it when people say parents don't know better.
I mean come on!!!! We all know that fruits and veggis are good for you, that baked is better then fried.
It take me 15 minutes to make a full healthy meal with salmon.
They do not do it because it's easier not to. how can they look at their little one that are overweight and not think that there is a better way? If I need help as a parent, I ask for it!!!! There is books, doctors, nutritionists, community organism.0 -
Aren't you preaching to the choir??0
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I love how people blame so much on there child hood when they have been out of it for so long. If you are over 18 and you are on this site worry about yourself take responsiblity for your own actions and move on
The thing about childhood is that the habits you develop in your formative years are the hardest to break, because we're meant, as human beings, to learn how to do things that will help us develop skills so we'll survive on our own. However, when we suffer from abuse or are shown the wrong habits to adopt (like over-eating -- which I think came over from previous eras where we didn't have ENOUGH food, so you ate whatever was given to you because who knows when you'll eat again?), we need to work harder to break them when we become adults.
That's kind of how this whole growing up deal works. You don't just get to wave a magic wand and go "Oh! Everything I learned in childhood is gone now!".0 -
Well I have to be one of the few who TOTALLY AGREE WITH YOU. When I married my bodybuilder husband, he was super healthy (still is, of course). I still don't eat as healthy as he does, but at least I don't eat junk all the time or eat fast food (hardly ever). We vowed that our chidren would BE TAUGHT...as PARENTS SHOULD DO...what's healthy, what's not, how much to eat, when to STOP, and staying active and exercising daily (even if it's just for a bit).
Our daughter is the healthiest child in her class at school...but we don't buy her the "easy" school lunches (which would save me so much time). I make her lunch every single night for school the next day, and you can be darn sure that it's VERY healthy...but also VERY good-tasting. I've been doing this every single day of her life since she was born...starting around 12 months, while she was still exclusively breastfeeding. She self-weaned at about 20 months of age, so she's had a "homemade lunch" (haha, literally!) since the day she was born.
And I wouldn't have done it any other way.
PARENTS...wake up. You are giving your children a death-sentence. They are learning from YOU. They want to be like YOU. They want to please YOU. Give them a positive role-model to look up to...you're #1 in their book!0 -
I agree that we have to educate our kids at a young age. When we had junk in the house my kids wanted to eat it all day long if I would have let them. Now we have fruit, veggies and healthy snacks and they are loving it. Now it is mommy can I have a banana, an orange, or something like that instead of mommy can I have some chips, cookies or candy. I feel so much better now knowing I am feeding my kids healthy foods. They get a treat once a week and now it is exactly that, a treat. My kids are 4 and 2 and I am hoping I am instilling healthy habits in them now that they will carry with them as they grow up. I definitely do not want them to deal with the issues I did being a heavy teenager and young adult, as well as an older adult now.
Stephanie0 -
I agree, my mom used to give me whatever I wanted. She was addicted to chocolate so she was always pressing it to me.... fortunally I didn't like chocolate, but I have a picture of her literally putting me and a bean bag in front of the TV with a huge bag of chips when I was like 8.. I didn't know better than.
Dinner and Lunch consisted of canned spaghetti, lots of frozen pizza, tons of chips, and french fries. And I remember she used to pull me out of school at lunch just to take me to Mcdonald's.
I agree up eating fast food and junk food at home, I actually looked forward to some of the schools food for a change. I struggle now because of this, because I can still taste that food and how much easier it was to cook and grab on the go.
I wish there had been better options when I was younger, but there wasn't and now I'm paying the price. It's not all her fault mind you, it's mine now that I'm out on my own, but when I was younger, yes I believe it was.0
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