Parents Please Wake Up

13567…17

Replies

  • Lucia_Armstrong1973
    Lucia_Armstrong1973 Posts: 51 Member
    What I don't understand is people saying that fast food is cheaper. I grew up the youngest of six kids, on just Dad's income as a mechanic. I never felt like we were "poor" (we were, but my folks were good at stretching dollars) but there's now way we could have afforded McDonalds or pizza at every meal. In fact, on those rare occasions we had McD's, my Dad would go to the drive thru and get burgers, while Mom stayed home with us and cooked her own fries. A couple potatoes, or even a big bag of Oreida, is a lot cheaper than eight small fries! Not to mention that a gallon of KoolAid is way way way cheaper than eight soft drinks. For that matter, homemade burgers are a lot less expensive than even dollar menu burgers, and way tastier now that I'm not a dumb kid. But it was a special treat for us to get McDonalds, and they gave in once in a while.

    Just about all the meals I cook for my husband and myself cost around $5 for the two of us. You can get a lot of meals out of a Big Pack of chicken breast ($1.99/pound on sale), a bag of mixed frozen veggies ($1.79 for 16oz bag for store brand) and box of dry pasta or rice ($.99 for 16oz on sale or store brand). Add some kind of sauce/marinade for flavor, and you have a balanced tasty and FILLING meal. On the other hand, if we each got a burger, fry and drink from the dollar menu, we'd be talking $6 and I know damn well neither one of us would be satisfied.


    yep have to agree with you! there is noway could be able to afford fast food most nites. you sound like me can make a good meal out of a few pounds :D i also love the task of trying to be inventive with my meals and getting it under a certain amount but that could be just me :laugh:

    This is assuming you don't have to catch the bus to the grocery store, and pay a jitney to drive you home with said groceries. You also left out the price of "some kind of sauce". 5.00 at the market is fine for two people, but what about when there's a third, fourth or fifth someone?

    Also, yes, when we were growing up McDonald's was much more expensive. No dollar menu!
  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member
    I understand your passion about this, and agree that it's a huge problem. I try to keep in mind that people are working with the only means they have - which in many cases, isn't much. Many are poorly educated and just downright poor. They're focused on keeping their children full, not nourished. A child's education includes very little on nutrition, and adults certainly are not educated on it. And even if this education did exist, it doesn't help kids in inner-cities who have little to no access to vegetables and whole grains.

    Not everyone lives a good life. I grew up living in other people's bedrooms or on their couches for a period. Do you (general, not directed to one person) think my mom was worried about my nutrition? She worked 2-3 jobs sometimes and bought me fast food so she could have dinner with me before running off to her next job. She bought me more fast food when we were cut off of food stamps as well, when her income went up. It's cheap to feed many people from the Dollar Menu. Sad but true.

    - lack of formal education on nutrition
    - lack of resources or access to healthier foods
    - lack of time/money

    Things to consider when we see the state of our children's health today. That, to me, is sadder than watching a kid inhale his 5th Happy Meal that week.


    Thanks for this. You said it way better than I could have. I feel like when people make posts like this they almost always leave out the scenario of the parents who are doing the best they can and either can't afford or lack knowledge about proper nutrition/health. A disproportionate number of children with weight problems actually come from families like this. I was one of the luckier ones, but I grew up with so many people who weren't, and what I learned is that it's a problem way bigger than anything that can be solved by telling parents to "wake up."

    Of course there are many factors that play into this, and the reasons for each family to choose the foods they do. There are people that are 'stuck'. They don't have the time and money for shopping, preparing, etc. The 'solutions' for these families are definitely more in depth than saying wake up and change. There are many families though that either don't know better or don't care about what they are eating and feeding their children. There is some denial in many families too I think. Then there is how the foods and drinks are packaged and marketed. When high calorie sugary drinks are being marketed as healthy, and all sorts of boxed foods are labeled whole grain and low fat, etc (think children's high sugar cereal, crackers, snacks, etc). Children do develop life long habits based on how they grow up in their families. Regardless if you are 18 or 40 and out of your parents' house, the effects of your childhood are with you forever. What you do with that is up to you, but it will always influence you, like it or not.
  • Want2weigh165
    Want2weigh165 Posts: 29 Member
    Although you make some very good points, I think a lot of the problem is the fact that many parents are struggling financially. I am one of them. A single mom, laid off, no food stamps to rely on like some others I am trying to live off of what I have saved. So at times me and my two year old son eat hotdogs mixed with pork n beans and broccoli on the side, less than a three dollar meal for several days b/c my budget is so tight. Even fast foods, sometimes we can split a double cheeseburger and small fries for two bucks. I'd love to have a lot of money to be able to cook and afford fresh fruits and veggies, chicken breast (it's like six bucks a bag!) etc. but for now I know we are eating high sodium foods, but we drink plenty of water and pray that my 25 dollar budget per week can increase soon!
  • silhouettes
    silhouettes Posts: 517 Member
    What I don't understand is people saying that fast food is cheaper. I grew up the youngest of six kids, on just Dad's income as a mechanic. I never felt like we were "poor" (we were, but my folks were good at stretching dollars) but there's now way we could have afforded McDonalds or pizza at every meal. In fact, on those rare occasions we had McD's, my Dad would go to the drive thru and get burgers, while Mom stayed home with us and cooked her own fries. A couple potatoes, or even a big bag of Oreida, is a lot cheaper than eight small fries! Not to mention that a gallon of KoolAid is way way way cheaper than eight soft drinks. For that matter, homemade burgers are a lot less expensive than even dollar menu burgers, and way tastier now that I'm not a dumb kid. But it was a special treat for us to get McDonalds, and they gave in once in a while.

    Just about all the meals I cook for my husband and myself cost around $5 for the two of us. You can get a lot of meals out of a Big Pack of chicken breast ($1.99/pound on sale), a bag of mixed frozen veggies ($1.79 for 16oz bag for store brand) and box of dry pasta or rice ($.99 for 16oz on sale or store brand). Add some kind of sauce/marinade for flavor, and you have a balanced tasty and FILLING meal. On the other hand, if we each got a burger, fry and drink from the dollar menu, we'd be talking $6 and I know damn well neither one of us would be satisfied.

    Fast food is cheaper than cooking at home if you have 2 or less people to feed, 2 Double Cheeseburgers and 2 Fries are only $4, or used to be. not defending anyone, just saying.
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
    Young or old we eat what we want. Filling the refrig with fruits, vegs, low fat whatever, Isn't going to stop school trading and just plain not eating. How healthy is not eating at all? Children are influenced more out of the house then in. It's called fitting in or finding persons like themselves. At any age we can decide when we want to control how much we eat 14 or 40. Blaming other people for our own choices is like saying we are not in control of ourselves. "Only I can hurt me, should I choice". Power, will and choice are ours to control.

    LOL I guess we'll have to agree to disagree then. :) I think parents play a HUGE role in how there children eat. Yes, they may not eat the most nutritiousness stuff when they are around, but parents still control what goes on the dinner table and what they serve them for breakfast, snacks, etc. And when a parent teaches a child about good nutrition and teaches a kid to make healthy food choices it has lasting effects.

    I agree. At least it worked for me. I taught my girls that eating healthy foods was important. Snacks and other unhealthy foods are great on occasion, but most of your meals should healthy. I was a poor single mother of two often working 2 jobs but I still prepared healthy meals most days. They are both in their 30's now, are both healthy and neither has ever been overweight. My youngest is now raising her son in the same way. When my grandson was 3 his favorite meal was baked mauhi mauhi and whole wheat couscous with mixed vegetables. Sure he loves cookies and pizza and Taco Bell, but he also loves tofu and carrots and apples and peas (his favorite). And he's rarely sick.
  • Want2weigh165
    Want2weigh165 Posts: 29 Member
    Well I have to be one of the few who TOTALLY AGREE WITH YOU. When I married my bodybuilder husband, he was super healthy (still is, of course). I still don't eat as healthy as he does, but at least I don't eat junk all the time or eat fast food (hardly ever). We vowed that our chidren would BE TAUGHT...as PARENTS SHOULD DO...what's healthy, what's not, how much to eat, when to STOP, and staying active and exercising daily (even if it's just for a bit).

    Our daughter is the healthiest child in her class at school...but we don't buy her the "easy" school lunches (which would save me so much time). I make her lunch every single night for school the next day, and you can be darn sure that it's VERY healthy...but also VERY good-tasting. I've been doing this every single day of her life since she was born...starting around 12 months, while she was still exclusively breastfeeding. She self-weaned at about 20 months of age, so she's had a "homemade lunch" (haha, literally!) since the day she was born.

    And I wouldn't have done it any other way.

    PARENTS...wake up. You are giving your children a death-sentence. They are learning from YOU. They want to be like YOU. They want to please YOU. Give them a positive role-model to look up to...you're #1 in their book!

    how can you sit here and assume that these parents need to wake up and accuse them of giving the children they love a death sentence????? some parents CANT afford to buy the expensive foods and single parents who have to work may not have the time to prepare gourmet foods you and your bodybuilder husband can afford. shame on you for making assumptions. Instead of complaining next time you see someone at the grocery store while you are stocking up on your healthy foods and they are strugglilng to buy the cheaper foods so their kids they love can survive, throw them some money and help them out so you can stop feeling the need to accuse parents of giving their kids a death sentence for money they may not have
  • lizgreenhill
    lizgreenhill Posts: 185
    I Dont buy junk food for my house. There is no chips, pop, candy, gummy anything, koolaid on occasion, and we do not eat fast food ever. My son is 5 he weighs 55lbs and hes 4ft tall. he doesnt have fat anywhere on his body, and im sure he can out eat anyone i know and he doesnt get fat. He is extremely active and i plan on keeping it that way. When he wants a snack he i tell him to eat some yogurt or eat some type of fruit and he loves it. I think parents need to quit being so lazy and start making home cooked meals instead of going out and shoving grease down their kids throats. I really feel bad for the kids that have to grow up with that kind of lifestyle because of their parents/guardians, its truly sad.
  • cheekydeeky
    cheekydeeky Posts: 146 Member
    i think for me the wake up call was when my teenager had bloodwork and she had high cholesterol. within 6 months of not eating burger king anymore, her bloodwork came back normal and healthy. that's all the evidence i needed.... we are now a healthy and happy family.
  • d2footballJRC
    d2footballJRC Posts: 2,684 Member
    I would argue that its not the food thats making children fat, its the lack of activity. I ate fast food, pizza etc.. growing up, pretty regularly but I played a lot of sports and ran around the neighborhood with friends. I was a skinny kid. I didnt get over weight until I got married, had kids and started working a job where I sat on my butt all day. Kids nowadays dont go outside, they dont ride around the neighborhood on their bikes. They sit in front of a tv and play X Box. When I was a kid I would wake up on Saturday morning and eat breakfast and my dad would say "go outside and play" I would go outside till lunch, then back out till dinner then back out till street lights came on. That doesnt happen now. Kids dont even walk around mow lawns anymore. adults do.

    This... I don't always eat clean or healthy. it comes down to activity. When I was a kid wasn't fat either, I was always out side running around with friends, wasn't til college and computers and sitting at a desk job til I really blew up in size. Activity is just as important as the food we put in our body. I absolutely hate it when people say weight loss is 85% diet, 15% exercise.

    I'd say it's 50% diet, 50% exercise. I truly feel that if you don't learn to move and exercise while you may lose the weight on the diet but down the road you'll be right back to were you started. Now that I finally started this trip and truly doing it for myself, I will never go back. I've accepted that exercise will have to be part of my life, and believe it or not I now enjoy it.

    Add in to the OP there are much worse things going on at home then someone feeding their kids fast food.. Pure neglect, abuse, alcoholism, or lack of anything that even seems like care or a parental image is more damaging to those kids then the food. Food and bad habits can be broken.. Abuse and neglect leave far deeper scars.

    Lastly OP, Right now you are in what is called the weight loss high. It's like a relationship,fresh, full of energy and life. I'll be curious to see if the Zeal is still there in the end. This is a life style change and if you can have this same zeal when you've completed your diet then you'll be a very effective advocate for this.

    I just don't like how people blame their parents for their transgressions. Are you telling me as you went through school and life until recently you never knew what you were eating was wrong? At least at my school, we had health class and physical education that we talked about this stuff. I don't think blame should be placed fully on the parents.
  • silhouettes
    silhouettes Posts: 517 Member
    I would argue that its not the food thats making children fat, its the lack of activity. I ate fast food, pizza etc.. growing up, pretty regularly but I played a lot of sports and ran around the neighborhood with friends. I was a skinny kid. I didnt get over weight until I got married, had kids and started working a job where I sat on my butt all day. Kids nowadays dont go outside, they dont ride around the neighborhood on their bikes. They sit in front of a tv and play X Box. When I was a kid I would wake up on Saturday morning and eat breakfast and my dad would say "go outside and play" I would go outside till lunch, then back out till dinner then back out till street lights came on. That doesnt happen now. Kids dont even walk around mow lawns anymore. adults do.

    That's true in part, but when I was younger, I was outside all day after school until dinner time... walking and playing.

    But due to my horrible diet I mentioned a few posts again I was always overweight. I guess this has to do with your body type and how you digest more than anything.
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
    Fast food is cheaper than cooking at home if you have 2 or less people to feed, 2 Double Cheeseburgers and 2 Fries are only $4, or used to be. not defending anyone, just saying.

    it would cost less than $4 to make 2 cheeseburgers at home, and they could have less fat, more veggie toppings, and the burgers would be thicker. Sure, you'd have leftover buns which can be frozen for later, and you'd have leftover cheese to use in other dishes, but the cost of just those 2 burgers and fries would be less.

    And you could subtract the gas $ spent driving to get the fast food, unless you never go to the grocery store for other things, but you know you do.
  • pandabear_
    pandabear_ Posts: 487 Member
    I love how people blame so much on there child hood when they have been out of it for so long. If you are over 18 and you are on this site worry about yourself take responsiblity for your own actions and move on

    That's exactly what I thought!

    And blaming your weight gain is not going to help your loss. Just focus on a goal instead of blaming. Blaming never helps anyone!
  • PepeGreggerton
    PepeGreggerton Posts: 986 Member
    I disagree that fast food is cheaper.
  • andrejjorje
    andrejjorje Posts: 497 Member
    It starts with education, in my opinion. The vast majority of people don't honestly know enough about nutrition to create a truly healthy diet for their children. Look at the forum posts on this site (a place where people are actively working at it) for how wide ranging and at times far-fetched the claims are. Even people who are educated on the subject (at least the ones I respect) fully admit that a lot is still unknown in this area.

    Some things are easier than others, granted, but if people don't have the full picture they end up making a lot of mistakes anyway even with good intentions.

    This .....
  • atsteele
    atsteele Posts: 1,358 Member
    also, the opposite is not the best way.
    I grew up fighting over sweets with my older brother, because our mom never bought them to us, she didn't want us to get fat and ruin our teeth.
    When we got them as present we would always fight about who got more...
    So i became selfish and when i'm eating chocolate or something it's like i'm afraid my brother is going to eat it instead, and there will be no chocolate left for me.
    This is why I gained weight.
    Now that i'm older and i'm living alone, i make all the food decisions by myself, i can have all the junk food i want... but still there's that "child nature" in me.
    of course, children like sweets, but making them available will maybe make children crave them less... and not care about the candy drawer.
    oh and by the way, my brother is overweight now too, the reason i'm slim is that i'm watching what i eat.
    so it affected both of us.

    My parents didn't allow sweets but on rare occasion as well. No sugar cereals, no kool aid, no cookies or chips. Only maybe on a birthday or a holiday. And I might have WANTED to eat junk food more often but it wasn't available. As a kid, I really enjoyed eating and enjoyed a variety of foods. And as adults only one of us four kids is overweight and that's only because he chooses to be sedentary. As an adult I see that my mom made a lot of sense: what's not available doesn't get eaten, and when you are hungry at mealtime, you end up eating what is nutritious and healthy. I might have more goodies in my house than my mother did, but I really limit how much they are allowed to partake. And in reality, I could probably remove all the junk and they wouldn't be scarred in any way and probably eat even better than they do now.
  • PBJunky
    PBJunky Posts: 737 Member
    Fast food is cheaper than cooking at home if you have 2 or less people to feed, 2 Double Cheeseburgers and 2 Fries are only $4, or used to be. not defending anyone, just saying.

    it would cost less than $4 to make 2 cheeseburgers at home, and they could have less fat, more veggie toppings, and the burgers would be thicker. Sure, you'd have leftover buns which can be frozen for later, and you'd have leftover cheese to use in other dishes, but the cost of just those 2 burgers and fries would be less.

    And you could subtract the gas $ spent driving to get the fast food, unless you never go to the grocery store for other things, but you know you do.

    Seriously you can make burgers for $4? Bloody hell our food is damn expensive on this side, decent patties would cost you $7.5 and that excludes the toppings, buns and basting
  • brittanyleigh05
    brittanyleigh05 Posts: 16
    Hi

    My childrens favourite meals are cod fillets baked with a sprinkle of parmesan served with broccili and baked potatoes, or a nice rare steak.

    We taught them from birth that fast food is ok for a treat but they hate Mcdonalds (apart form the shakes) so if they are naughty we threaten to take them there for dinner lol

    I have always advocated that no food is 'bad' as that leads to issues but everything in moderation. They both have a very heatlhy attitude to food as nothing has been denied them but both would choose strawberries or satsumas over sweets and chocolate so we must have done something right.

    They are boys aged 9 and 11.
    martyxx

    that is awesome! i babysat for a family who has 5 children, and they were always the same way. their kids love fruit and normally would rather have fruit than candy. however, they do love some chick-fil-a. :)
  • baypathgradLyns
    baypathgradLyns Posts: 639 Member
    I am very conscious of the way I feed my children (5 & 8) because I want them to be as healthy as possible and I don't want them to develop bad habits that they struggle with in adulthood (like myself). I write a blog (now more of a facebook page) that gives other parents and idea of how easy and affordable it is to provide a healthy diet for their kiddos, and how kids don't have to be picky eaters...we usually make them that way!

    http://www.facebook.com/whataremykidseating

    Can I just say WOW!!! this is amazing what you are doing on FB!!! way to set an example :)
  • twynzmom
    twynzmom Posts: 172
    and parents need to get their kids out of the house and into sports and exercise as well
  • silhouettes
    silhouettes Posts: 517 Member
    I said I wasn't defending anyone, but to make 2 healthy hamburgers and 2 healthy fries at home there is no WAY it's less than $4.

    My 93 percent hamburger alone costs $4, my buns over $2, cheese over $2-3 becuase you can't just buy one piece and fries are $2-$3 a bag.

    Cheap buns that aren't healthy are maybe a $1, but hamburger is still $2-3 for a pound of 73 percent around here, and then there is the cheese and fries again.

    I don't eat Mcdonalds anymore or their cheeseburgers and fries, they probably raised the price since I got them last, the $4 was when I went last.

    I'm just saying from the view of me, how struggles with money and staying healthy, I know the prices of food at the grocery store around here and they are ridiculous!!!!

    And yes, when we buy the 93 percent pound of $4 hamburger, it is all eaten, none left to be frozen.

    EDIT: and don't forget the price of tomato's, lettace, ketchup, mustard, onion, and seasonings (who eats hamburgers without some kind of season?) if you need them. I don't have spare tomato's and lettuce in my refridgerator most of the time.. I know I should, but I just don't, we use all we buy for what it's bought for.
  • lizgreenhill
    lizgreenhill Posts: 185
    how can you sit here and assume that these parents need to wake up and accuse them of giving the children they love a death sentence????? some parents CANT afford to buy the expensive foods and single parents who have to work may not have the time to prepare gourmet foods you and your bodybuilder husband can afford. shame on you for making assumptions. Instead of complaining next time you see someone at the grocery store while you are stocking up on your healthy foods and they are strugglilng to buy the cheaper foods so their kids they love can survive, throw them some money and help them out so you can stop feeling the need to accuse parents of giving their kids a death sentence for money they may not have
    [/quote]

    I agree with you. It is not always the parents fault that they can not afford to buy their kids food ,but instead of buying some types of junk food because it is cheaper isnt a good thing either. hell i used to be that parent. I have been a single mom 3 out of the 5 years my son has been alive. I have raised my son on my own with under $700 a month for bills and food it was rough and its not always the easist making "smart healthy choices" but u do with what you got. I used to take my son out atleast 2 times a week for fast food because i worked crazy shifts and didnt have the time to make him dinner. But then i changed my work shift and made sure i was home every single night to cook my son dinner to make sure he had a home cooked meal.
  • ALW65
    ALW65 Posts: 643 Member
    You know what's great about this thread? I think it's fair to say that everyone who posted had a point. Some were more zealous than others, but they all had good thoughts about the issue and/or the problem.

    Just like training ourselves to eat healthy and exercise, there are always obstacles in the way with our kids. It's the rare person who knows all the "right" stuff to do and can actually do it 24/7.

    Hopefully we all keep learning, teach by example, and share what we learn with our friends and family.

    (Like the Prell commercial...I told two friends, then she told two friends, and so on, and so on - You're older like me if you remember that one!)
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,228 Member
    I have one child who is overweight and one child who is underweight. I myself am obese. Of course, I am here to change that and in the process I have been teaching my one child to eat healthier. I actually did not even realize the portions she was eating until I started this plan. She would sit down for a snack and have 4 or 5 servings in a sitting. Anyway, when I asked the doctor about her weight, the response was more or less to increase her activity levels. It is my understanding that pediatricians generally don't put children on a diet unless they are obese. But they lecture parents if kids are over and underweight which is extremely frustrating to say the least. It is like I'm being accused of starving one and stuffing the other. It is also very difficult to deprive one of foods she likes and wants, and encourage the other to take double servings. While I can't say that I am not guilty of feeding my children junk, I am saying that it is far easier for someone without children to wag their fingers at people who do. As a previous poster said, it is not as cut and dry as telling someone to feed their kids better food.
  • Hambone23
    Hambone23 Posts: 486 Member
    also, the opposite is not the best way.
    I grew up fighting over sweets with my older brother, because our mom never bought them to us, she didn't want us to get fat and ruin our teeth.
    When we got them as present we would always fight about who got more...
    So i became selfish and when i'm eating chocolate or something it's like i'm afraid my brother is going to eat it instead, and there will be no chocolate left for me.
    This is why I gained weight.
    Now that i'm older and i'm living alone, i make all the food decisions by myself, i can have all the junk food i want... but still there's that "child nature" in me.
    of course, children like sweets, but making them available will maybe make children crave them less... and not care about the candy drawer.
    oh and by the way, my brother is overweight now too, the reason i'm slim is that i'm watching what i eat.
    so it affected both of us.

    ^^^ This. My mother made food off limits; it turned into binge eating when I was old enough to be on my own. Nutrition is important, but I think teaching your children moderation is probably just as important. But I have no kids. So what do I know? :}
  • UpEarly
    UpEarly Posts: 2,555 Member
    Meh... I don't think being raised on healthy food necessarily means that you're going to be a fit, thin, healthy-eating adult.

    I grew up in a house without soda. Meals were home cooked. We almost NEVER had fast food, unless it was some other kid's birthday party at McDonald's. Dessert was fruit. Bread was whole wheat. I ate broiled fish and salad as a toddler.

    By the time I was in high school, I was sneaking junk food into my diet whenever I went out with friends. And when I got out on my own , I completely discontinued eating the way I was 'taught' because junk food was faster, easier and cheaper. I totally rebelled against every single one of my nutritionist mother's lessons. :-)

    I've learned on my own to do what works for me - which is a mix of mostly healthy homemade food, with a moderate amount of junk thrown in to keep me from feeling deprived.
  • annameier8706
    annameier8706 Posts: 417 Member
    I agree. I am constantly shocked at Wal Mart at how many children (under 5) I see drinking soda. This last week I saw a two year old drinking soda out of a baby bottle. This bothers for me than just the soda though. It's all about healthy choices, and moderation. Yes I give my kids candy and desserts. Yes I let my kids eat chips and pizza and fast food. But less than once a week. Soda though, they will not have soda until they are well over 5. There is no reason a child can't be healthy with 100% juice drinks, water, and milk.
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
    Of course there are many factors that play into this, and the reasons for each family to choose the foods they do. There are people that are 'stuck'. They don't have the time and money for shopping, preparing, etc. The 'solutions' for these families are definitely more in depth than saying wake up and change. There are many families though that either don't know better or don't care about what they are eating and feeding their children. There is some denial in many families too I think. Then there is how the foods and drinks are packaged and marketed. When high calorie sugary drinks are being marketed as healthy, and all sorts of boxed foods are labeled whole grain and low fat, etc (think children's high sugar cereal, crackers, snacks, etc). Children do develop life long habits based on how they grow up in their families. Regardless if you are 18 or 40 and out of your parents' house, the effects of your childhood are with you forever. What you do with that is up to you, but it will always influence you, like it or not.

    I agree that many are in denial. They purposely refuse to believe that they are teaching their kids unhealthy habits and making them ill because they are too lazy to do the right things. Anyone that says they don't have the time and money to shop and prepare a healthy meal is really just saying I don't have time and money to raise my children properly. And their is a very small minority for which not have the $ to feed their children is true, but in those cases the children will be thin from not getting enough to eat. They are not eating fast food, because no matter how much people say it's cheaper, it is not. Most who say this still have cable, and game systems, and cell phones and all the other uneccesary trappings and the trust is that they are just too addicted to unhealthy food themselves or too lazy to prepare healthy meals. Or both.
  • wychwych
    wychwych Posts: 21
    I am a product of my upbringing. I was fed good wholesome old fashioned food.....and was expected to clear my plate. We didn't eat 'junk' food but some of the things we did eat where high fat. We ate lots of fruit and veg but as a large family it was sometimes first come first served so we used to dig into mum's fantastic pies and puddings even when we weren't hungry so that we didn't miss out. As I reached 10 or 11years old, mum realising that I was way to heavy started to go the other way........trying to enforce really strict diets on me. I rebelled and began secret eating. I was bullied and felt that I could never meet the grade either in the eyes of my parents or my peers.
    Now as a mum myself, I have always fed my daughter a healthy home-cooked diet. Nothing is excluded and she is not expected to clear her plate. We occasionally eat junk food, but it is occasionally. At a similar age to when my problems began my daughter began to put on a little weight. We had a chat and she said it was worrying her a little. I refused to put her on a diet but she decided herself to eat healthier things like fruit as snacks. She still eats crisps and chocolate like any other teen but she is now a happy healthy 15 year old who is a normal weight and is able to wear what she wants...... if anything the clothes she had last year are now too little loose on her.
    It would be easy to blame my mum for my weight problems and while she did have a role to play, ultimately my weight problem is down to me.
    It is easy to be critical of other people and the choices they make. I can cook and although I am on a low income I able to make healthy meals within my budget. Too many people I know can't cook, so junk food, processed food and ready meals are their only option as they are too scared to experiment. I feel that it is only through accepting my part in the problem that I can move forward.
  • calliope_music
    calliope_music Posts: 1,242 Member
    what about the parents that don't have access to a grocery store? or, if there's one close by, they have to take their 5 kids under the age of 10 on the bus (which costs money) and transfer a few times? or, if there's no money for the bus, they have to walk 3 miles in the snow with their kids because there's no babysitter? or, if there's a babysitter available, how are they going to pay for it when they don't have a job and are on food stamps?

    perhaps there's not a grocery store nearby, but a convenience store that sells canned junk? that's where most of the people that i work with do their GROCERY shopping.

    junk food keeps kids fuller longer. for me, a big mac meal is going to keep me fuller than a piece of fish and some vegetables. parents buy their kids junk food in the area i work with BECAUSE of this. if they have a set amount of food stamps - let's say 500 a month, because that seems to be the average around my area for a family of 5 (an adult and 4 kids) - junk food is simply going to fill them up longer. many of the families i work with, who are absolutely destitute - once that food stamp money is gone, that's it. i had a mother tell me she was going to go sell plasma to try to get her child a nice Christmas dinner. my hubby and i easily spend 400 a month on food for the two of us, and we mainly buy generics and on sale.

    and activity, sure. what about the gangs that shoot people? around here, that's pretty normal. or people who just mug you on the street. there are rec centers, but they cost money to enroll. most parents that i work with don't want their kids outside unless they're home.

    education is key here. parents simply need to be educated on the choices for their kids, and access to nutritious foods needs to be improved, particularly in urban areas. and calling this child abuse? no. i work with kids who have been raped by their fathers, had the crap beaten out of them, neglected, been crack babies, etc. that's abuse. this is simply lack of education and lack of access to nutritious foods. unless you've been in this situation (maybe you have, i was just too upset to read through the whole thing) don't bother calling it abuse.

    /gets off soapbox
  • eliz_in_pink
    eliz_in_pink Posts: 278 Member
    :) Stacy, I heart you for this post.

    I'm a step-parent and only have every other weekend to undo what is being put into my step-daughter's body when we aren't with her... She is nearing 10 (December 30th) and her mom feeds her everything under the sun that isn't healthy (whole cans of Spaghetti-Os, fast foods, and JUNK.. just straight JUNK!) She is one of the 'chunky' kids in her class because her mother refuses to learn to cook. Troy, my fiance, is an amazing cook and always cooks healthy when we have a meal. My step-daughter has decided that she wants to be more like me and we have healthy snacks (fruits & veggies) and she has opted for healthier meals too or smaller portions when she is with us.. This is not something we make her do, but at 10 years old she knows that she can make most of her own decisions when it comes to eating when we give her options.

    She gets pumped full of the other 'crap' and she knows she is one of the heaviest in her class. It made her sad when we went shopping and we could fit into the same jeans.. I remember feeling like her. I feel for her. I don't make her feel bad, though. She knows that when she is at daddy's house we will eat healthy and eat the way she wants to. We don't force her to eat healthy or what-not. She even exercised with me on Saturday. What a trooper she is, I didn't pressure her into working out. While I want her to be healthy, the last thing I want to do is make her feel bad because of the choices her mother makes through the week for her.

    My wish for her is that her mother would learn how to cook healthier and eat healthier, as even her mother (and this is not be being spiteful) has put on about 50-75 pounds over the past year. I want them both to live long, happy, healthy lives.
This discussion has been closed.

Categories